Seonghwa sighed for what must have been the 50th time since Hongjoong had informed him of the news. His knee moved restlessly up and down as he fidgeted anxiously.
"It's only three day, right?" he asked, the worry seeping into his voice, almost causing it to crack.
Hongjoong echoed his sigh, and stopped his packing to turn and look at the oldest member.
"Only three days, Seonghwa," he reassured. "It's really not that long."
"Oh, it will go fast for you no doubt. But it will feel like an eternity to me."
Hongjoong just shook his head. "You sound like Wooyoung right now."
Not being able to resist the urge, Seonghwa moved to help Hongjoong pack, although in a more neatly manner. It was not due to his cleanly nature, but rather as a way to release the pent up agitation and worry that filled him.
"I am happy for you, Hongjoong, I really am. But..." his voice trailed away, and he bent over the suitcase to tuck the pair of socks in.
Hongjoong smiled at him. "I know, Seonghwa. And I really wish it didn't have to be now, but you know it is another good opportunity to get Ateez's name out there."
"What if something happens while you are gone? What if-"
"Seonghwa, you are overthinking. I am leaving you in charge and I know you can do it"
"I don't have leader qualities like you do. I don't know how to balance being strict and being their friend. You do it so perfectly."
Hongjoong couldn't help but smile again. Despite being the oldest in Ateez, Seonghwa loved to hang out and be chaotic with the younger members. He was the youngest in his own family, after all.
"It will be fine," he reassured him again.
But as he continued packing his bag, his heart grew heavy. If he had to be honest, the same worries filled him. Manager Ho had officially returned now and was picking up more shifts. Would everything really be okay?
Several weeks had passed since the incident where Yunho had taken the blame for Mingi and since then the manager had mostly kept to himself. To Hongjoong's surprise, the manager actually let them get away with a lot more now. Wooyoung had smart-mouthed him on several occasions, Yeosang had repeatedly forced him to repeat instructions over and over again, and Mingi had continued his bad habit of always being late. And yet, the manager had kept his cool every time.
If not for this reason, Hongjoong might have actually turned down the fashion show he had been personally invited to. He was not completely at ease, but he kept telling himself three days was not that long.
"It will be fine, Seonghwa," he repeated, although he was really talking to himself this time. "Get Yunho to help you if needed. Okay?"
Seonghwa nodded miserably, before forcing the leader a smile. "Just enjoy yourself, Hongjoong. And don't worry about us."
Hongjoong smiled back at him, hoping it didn't look just as forced. Knowing his chaotic members too well, the captain knew he had every reason to worry.
* * * * *
Two days had quickly passed without any major mishaps, and Seonghwa was finally beginning to be able to relax. There was one more day to get through and then Hongjoong would be back.
Despite the younger members being on their best behaviour, it still hadn't been a stress-free couple of days. Ateez had been invited last minute to sing at a huge charity function. And since it was for struggling youth, something Ateez stood for, KQ had agreed. The poor staff had been thrown into a panicked rush to design a special stage for the event and create their outfits. For despite being a charity function, many important people were going to be present. And the company was pressuring Ateez to make a good impression by expressing the message while incorporating their own lore.
As it was happening the same day that Hongjoong was returning, Ateez had to prepare the choreography as seven, as their leader would be too jet-lagged to join them. And while they were at the company to practice, the stylist noonas dragged them away into the dressing room and began checking their new outfits.
Seonghwa didn't need to have his stylist say anything, for he could tell by the way she cocked her head to one side and clicked her tongue disapprovingly that something wasn't right. And he guessed it, before she even spoke.
"Your waist is so tiny," the older woman scolded him gently. "You and Sannie, you need to eat more, yes?"
Seonghwa just smiled awkwardly. He was proud and happy with how he looked now, a big step from the boy who had grown his hair out to hide his face. But he was aware that his body proportions meant he needed extra fitting for the stage outfits. Not as much as San though. San always gave the stylists grief with his wide shoulders and slim waist.
Sighing softly and feeling a little bad for troubling the stylist, Seonghwa glanced around to see how the other members were faring. Mingi, Yunho, Wooyoung, and Jongho had all finished and were playing on their phones as they waited. Yeosang was just getting the finishing touches done, and San had about 3 or 4 staff members gathered about him, waving about their scissors, and their hands full of pins. They either came to a decision or gave up, because they suddenly took the jacket back from San and hurried away with it.
San turned and grinned at Seonghwa.
"How are you still getting fitted, hyung?" he teased, coming over to stand beside his hyung.
"Eun-ji noona is having her baby soon," Wooyoung hissed at him, as he came over to join them.
"Ah," San murmured, nodding thoughtfully. "I wonder if she will bring it in after it is born. I really hope so."
Wooyoung nodded in agreement, before reaching out and poking Seonghwa. "Aw, hyung. You look absolutely breath-taking."
Seonghwa couldn't help but smile.
Wooyoung glanced at San, and San grinned back at him.
Sensing that trouble was brewing between the two, Seonghwa stepped back, shaking his head.
San's grin widened. "What's wrong, hyung?" he asked innocently. "You afraid I might do this."
He quickly reached out and tickled Seonghwa under the arm.
Seonghwa let out a laugh, before trying to push San away.
"Not now, San," he tried to tell him in a stern voice, but failing miserably.
"Aw, you are not ticklish are you, hyung?" Wooyoung joined in, attacking Seonghwa from the other side.
Seonghwa doubled over laughing as he tried to pin his arms tightly to his sides and protect his vulnerable tortured armpits. But as he glanced up to see what Wooyoung's and San's next move of attack was, his smile faded.
Manager Ho had entered the room and was leaning against the doorway, his cold dark eyes watching them sharply.
"Yah, guys, we better stop," Seonghwa tried to warn his two dongaengs as he straightened himself up.
But Woosan didn't hear him, and the moment he lowered his guard, they attacked him once more. They were expecting him to dodge or push back, but since his attention was no longer on them, they pushed against him harder than they meant to. Seonghwa was sent reeling backwards and San tried to grab at him to save him. His hand clutched around Seonghwa's jacket and there was a loud tearing sound, followed by the clattering of hundreds of pearly beads sprinkling across the floor.
Seonghwa hit the floor with a loud thump and the air was driven out of his body. He lay there motionless for a moment, before Wooyoung and San frantically helped him sit up, apologising as they did so.
Seonghwa looked passed them to where Manager Ho had now pushed himself away from the doorway and was heading over to them. Seonghwa immediately rose to his feet, putting himself between the approaching manager and WooSan. But he was distracted as a sudden wail rent the air.
"No, no, what happened? The outfit..."
Seonghwa turned to see a pale-faced Eun-ji staring at him with a horrified expression on her face. As San moved to comfort her, the poor stylist burst into a flood of tears. She shook her hands in despair.
"We have no time. Oh, what do I do?"
"It's not your fault, noona," Seonghwa quickly told her. "I'll explain what happened and cover any cost."
Wooyoung went to protest, but Seonghwa ignored him.
"Don't stress about it," San told her gently as he slipped an arm about her. "It's not good for the baby. You should finish up and go home. I'll ask my stylist to fix the jacket."
Eun-ji smiled through her tears, before taking Seonghwa's ruined jacket with trembling fingers. She then hurried away with it.
Seonghwa sucked in a deep shuddering breath before slowly turning to glance at the manager. For a moment, Manager Ho just stared sharply back at him. Then in a curt voice, he ordered,
"You three follow me."
He didn't even wait to see if they would obey. He swung about on his heels and strode out of the room.
Closing his eyes tightly for a brief moment, and thinking of his beloved fellow matz, Seonghwa reluctantly followed, while Wooyoung and San dragged their feet along behind him. They followed Manager Ho into his office and stood stiffly at attention before his desk. They didn't have to wait long for Manager Ho to speak.
"When I returned I had hopes that you boys might have matured a little. Your leader Hongjoong insisted he could keep you all in line and discipline you as needed. But from what I see, not one single thing has changed." His voice was growing louder and angrier with every word. "You are all still immature, reckless, and without a single ounce of respect. Wooyoung, and San, is Seonghwa your dongsaeng or is he your hyung?"
San visibly flinched at hearing his name and shook his head timidly.
"He's our hyung, sir," he whispered in a tiny voice.
Wooyoung was a bit more vocal however. "I have plenty of respect," he argued, before adding in a low voice. "Just not for you."
Seonghwa immediately nudged him with his elbow and Wooyoung rolled his eyes.
"You are proving my point, Jung Wooyoung," Manager Ho hissed, his eyes blazing with barely restrained anger. "I clearly heard Seonghwa tell you two to stop harassing him while he was being fitted. And yet you both disrespected his authority and continued fooling around. Even now you refuse to take his authority seriously."
San glanced at Seonghwa, wondering if his hyung was truly upset by the way they played around with him. He was sure Seonghwa was usually the one who tried to initiate the playful banter between them and not-so-secretly loved it. Had he read it wrong?
Manager Ho now turned his anger on to Seonghwa. "And you. You are not any better than either of them. If you tell a dongsaeng to do something, enforce it. You are their hyung, so stop allowing them to run wild and undermine your authority. You are only showing yourself as weak and a pushover. If Hongjoong left you in charge, then step up and start acting like their hyung."
Tears stung Seonghwa's eyes at the sharp lecture. A part of him felt like he had let down their captain, while another part shattered at the thought of no longer allowing San and Wooyoung to fool around with him. He felt someone take his hand, but his vision was too blurred to see who was attempting to comfort him. He just squeezed their hand back tightly.
"We have been together for five years," Seonghwa heard San suddenly say in a voice that was tinged with anger over the injustice. "I think we understand our own dynamics well enough and know when not to take things too far. An outsider would not see it as we do, and should not try to interpret it as they like."
Manager Ho slammed his fist down on the desk, causing all three of the Ateez members to jump with fright. "You have no respect for your hyung, your leader, or even your manager. Has fame gone to your heads so much that you think you are higher than others?"
To everyone's shock, Wooyoung chose the following silence, to let out a chuckle.
"I say, if you need anger management classes, I'd be happy to pay for them for you. I am sure that's something proper a respectful dongsaeng could do for his senior."
Seonghwa turned to gape at the younger member. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see the manager's face had started turning a bright shade of red as his anger boiled over. Reacting quickly to try and save his dongsaeng, Seonghwa thought of what Hongjoong might do in the situation and took a step closer to Wooyoung.
"WOOYOUNG, APOLOGISE THIS INSTANT!" He demanded angrily, his voice rising to a height it had almost never reached before.
Wooyoung gave a careless shrug. "Aw, but Hyung, I'm not really that sorry so what's the point?"
Behind him, Seonghwa heard San suck in air between his teeth. He squeezed his eyes shut as he heard the manager's footsteps come around the desk.
"I was going to let you all off with a simple lecture and warning, Mr Jung Wooyoung," Seonghwa heard the manager hissing angrily. "But you are continuing to prove that such discipline is not enough for you. San."
Hearing his name, San inched forward, his hand still holding Seonghwa's tightly, although now he was seeking comfort rather than giving it.
"Y-yes, sir?"
"Apologise to your hyung for your disrespect and the damage to his outfit."
San glanced at Seonghwa and his gaze faltered, lowering to the floor. He was truly sorry for what had happened to his hyung's outfit, and he was even more sorry if Seonghwa had taken his silly antics the wrong way. But it was one thing to be truly sorry for something, and another to be forced to apologise in front of everyone. He bowed his head low, wanting to get it all over with and to go back to the comfort of the dorm.
"I am sorry, hyung," he murmured softly in a repentant voice. "I was wrong for fooling around and not listening to you. If you felt disrespected in any way, I hope you can comfortably tell me, and I will change my behaviour accordingly."
Seonghwa squeezed his hand tightly. "It's okay, Sannie. I'm not-"
"Seonghwa.." the manager warned in a low voice. "You accept his apology. Nothing about his behaviour was okay, so be wary of how you word it."
Seonghwa's jaw twitched at the sharp lecture. It took every ounce of his willpower to not embrace San and tell him that he loved playing with him and that he had never felt disrespected or offended in any way. That it was all okay.
But he couldn't make things worse for San. So, he just stiffly nodded his head.
"I accept your apology, San."
Manager Ho nodded approvingly. "Alright, very good. San, you may return to the dorm then." He paused and glanced at Wooyoung, then added. "You may leave as well, Seonghwa. I don't know how long we will be."
Seonghwa glanced at Wooyoung, then back at the manager. "If you don't mind, sir, I'd rather stay here."
"I do mind," the manager cut in sharply. "I believe this whole incident started due to a lack of respect and obedience, so don't start being a bad example to your dongsaengs now."
Seonghwa hesitated for a moment longer, his gaze lingering on Wooyoung. But feeling San's hands shaking in his own grasp, he knew there were other things to attend too. He didn't want to risk angering the manager further and prompting him to end up punishing them all. He could see San's face growing pale with drop of perspiration gathering upon his brow. He knew he put up an argument, San would be driven to the point of a panic attack.
Bowing his head stiffly, he turned and pulled San out of the room. He wanted nothing more than to call Hongjoong and beg him to come back, or to at least be given some advice on what to do. But he couldn't. It would just upset the leader and make him anxious while he waited for his flight home. Seonghwa couldn't do that to him.
He heard a soft sniffle, and glanced at San. The younger dancer was trying his hardest to keep it together, but he was failing miserably. Sighing, Seonghwa slipped an arm over his shoulder.
"It's okay, Sannie. You can let it out. I know he frightens you." He frightens me too, Seonghwa thought although he refrained from voicing his thoughts.
San leaned heavily against him, sobbing for all his worth.
"Stupid Wooyoung," he sobbed. "Why's he always gotta be so mouthy?"
Seonghwa's lip trembled and he pulled San closer so that he wouldn't see that his hyung was crying too. He wanted to comfort San, but there was nothing to say.
Back in the manager's office, Manager Ho had strode angrily over to the desk and swiped up a sturdy wooden ruler.
Wooyoung watching him calmly. He was not at all afraid of the manager as most of the others were. For Wooyoung was someone who actually took respect very seriously. Despite what others often thought of him, Wooyoung was a very considerate, humble and caring person. He had a big heart that never seemed to tire of pouring out love on those about him. But with that big heart, came a fiery temper that blazed at any injustice committed against those that he loved. And he had no respect whatsoever to those that abused their power and authority over others. With all his energy put into loving, he had none left over to put up with any nonsense.
And so he watched the manager with dark eyes and a small taunting smile. There was no respect there for the older man with his inferior complex, who somehow felt threatened by these men who were half his age.
"Put out your hands," Mr Ho snapped angrily as he came over to stand in front of Wooyoung.
"Do you want my shoe too?" Wooyoung asked, his eyes widening into a mock expression of innocence.
Mr Ho's mouth tightened, and he turned to throw the ruler back onto his desk.
"If you not going to take this seriously, and are just going to get smart with me, you can get against the wall instead."
Wooyoung scowled at him, but moved to comply. He stopped halfway however, and turned back to look at the manager.
"Did you get a written warning last time? Because maybe you should stick it to the wall above my head so that you don't get carried away like you did with Hongjoong-hyung."
Manager Ho's hands were visibly shaking as he attempted to regain control of his anger. It was taking every ounce of his being not to get physical with the younger man, right then and there. But Wooyoung had a point. Manager Ho knew he had to restrain himself and not punish anyone in anger. For he had in fact, received a warning for that incident.
"Keep up this sassy attitude and you will get a taste of the cane. Wouldn't that be a shame after your leader took it in your stead to save you from it?"
His words hit Wooyoung like he knew they would. His face flushing with shame and anger, Wooyoung turned back around and his palms slapped into the wall as he braced himself against it. Behind his, he heard the dreadful clinking of a belt buckle being undone, and then the soft hiss as it was pulled free.
Manager Ho placed his left hand heavily against the nape of Wooyoung's neck, causing Wooyoung to flinch.
"If there is one thing I hate, it is disrespect and a smart mouth."
Wooyoung couldn't stop his own smart mouth from speaking. "That's two, sir. Maybe I should pay for Math classes as well."
THWACK!
The sound echoed across the room, before a loud silence fell.
It was like all air had been driven from Wooyoung's lungs. He couldn't breath or make a sound, he just leaned against the wall, his hot face pressed to the cool wallpaper. For a moment, he did not even feel pain. His legs just felt extremely numb. But it only lasted for a second. The pain suddenly blossomed and spread, tingling and burning.
Wooyoung let out a shuddering gasp, the tears springing to his eyes. It hurt.
Manager Ho had stepped back after that blow. His hand had gone to his face and he breathed heavily as though trying to calm himself.
"Don't make me angry," he muttered. He squeezed his eyes shut as he pinched the bridge of his nose tightly. "Just go."
Wooyoung slowly turned around, his movement stiff and careful. "Sir?" he asked, wondering what game the manager was playing at now.
"Go back to the dorm and tell Seonghwa he's to punish you. He is your hyung and currently in place of the leader. As it was him you first disrespected and disobeyed, he should punish you."
Wooyoung stumbled towards the door, no longer confident in himself or the situation. He stopped as Manager Ho spoke again.
"This is a final chance. If Seonghwa does not punish you, I will never trust either of your two hyungs to do it. He is not only to punish you for disrespecting him, but for all the smart mouthing as well. Is that understood?"
"Ye-yes, sir."
Bowing his head so the manager would not change his mind, Wooyoung hurried out the door as fast as he could. That single blow had definitely left a fine bruise, and Wooyoung couldn't help but feel a bit of regret over his actions.
Back in the office, Manager Ho collapsed into his chair. Did he really need those anger management classes?
* * * * *
Seonghwa leapt to his feet and rushed to the front door of the dorm as he heard a car pulling up in the drive.
"Wooyoungie, are you okay?"
He pulled the younger man into his arms, his sharp eyes gazing him up and down. He had noticed the slight limp, but Wooyoung didn't overall seem that worse for wear.
Wooyoung just bowed his head, his face flushing.
"I'm sorry, hyung. I kept smart-mouthing him and he got too angry to punish me, so..."
The look that crossed Seonghwa's face could have killed Wooyoung. It wasn't anger. It was an expression of complete dread, horror, and worry.
"He...he wants me to do it?" Seonghwa asked hesitantly.
Wooyoung bowed his head again. "I'm sorry, hyu-"
Smack!
Wooyoung yelped, his head snapping up to stare at Seonghwa with a mix of hurt and betrayal. Seonghwa hadn't actually hit him very hard, but he had unwittingly hit the bruise straight on. Seonghwa looked a little surprised at the tear that had sprung to Wooyoung's eyes.
"What were you thinking, Woo?" he scolded. "How could you be so foolish? You know what he is capable of. Didn't you know how hard he punished Yunho the other week?"
Wooyoung rubbed his backside gently before realising he was making it worse.
"I'm sorry, hyung," he muttered. "I just can't take him seriously, and I can't help but want to let him know that."
Seonghwa put a hand on his shoulder and pulled him firmly through the living room and towards the matz bedroom. Wooyoung immediately sensed what was happening, and dug his heels into the floor.
"Wooyoung.." Seonghwa warned, as he stopped and turned to face his dongsaeng.
"We don't have to do it for real, hyung," Wooyoung protested. "How is he going to know anyway? I'll just limp around for a bit, and he will never know."
"Do you think your behaviour was okay?" Seonghwa asked calmly, his eyes studying Wooyoung closely.
Wooyoung stared back up at him, and for a moment his gaze faltered.
"It's not like he deserves my respect anyway."
Seonghwa didn't say anything. It had been drummed into him since youth that you had to respect those above you (in both age and experience) no matter how much you liked them or not. But he also couldn't help but agree with Wooyoung. Why did they have to respect someone who had caused them so much pain and grief? It tore Seonghwa apart, not knowing which part of himself to listen to.
He sighed. "You didn't have to agree with what he said, Wooyoung. But you really went out of your way to torment him and push his buttons. He probably would have let it go if you just kept your thoughts to yourself."
"But if we are always bowing and yes sir-ing, it's just going to go to his head. Why should I have to give him what he wants just because he can abuse his authority if we don't? I am not going to beat around the bush anymore, hyung. That b*****d abuses us. Don't try and sugar coat that using words like punishment and discipline."
He shoved passed Seonghwa and marched up into his room. He stopped at the door however, and headed for San's room instead.
Downstairs, Seonghwa sank onto the couch and buried his face into his hands. A soft shuddering sob broke from him, and he rubbed at his eyes in frustration. You are the hyung, Seonghwa, he berated himself. You can't cry now. You have to figure this out.
But as he tried to think of how Hongjoong would deal with this, the manager's cutting words kept floating back to his mind.
"And you. You are not any better than either of them. If you tell a dongsaeng to do something, enforce it. You are their hyung, so stop allowing them to run wild and undermine your authority. You are only showing yourself as weak and a pushover. If Hongjoong left you in charge, then step up and start acting like their hyung."
Would Hongjoong be disappointed in him? Was he a pushover after all?
He tapped his fist against his forehead as though trying to force his mind to work harder. How would Hongjoong deal with this, he thought again. What would Hongjoong do? What would...
"I'm not Hongjoong," he whispered out loud. "I don't need to be Hongjoong."
He rose to his feet and hurried up the stairs, skipping two at a time. He knew where Wooyoung would have gone, and he was right. He found Wooyoung and San sitting together on the bed, neither of them uttering a word as they both stared miserably at the floor.
To Seonghwa's surprise, they both rose to their feet and bowed their heads apologetically.
"We both reflected on our actions, hyung, and we realise Manager Ho was right. You did ask us to stop fooling around and we didn't take you seriously. We could have hurt you, and we caused unnecessary stress for Eun-ji noona. You are our hyung, and we often take advantage of the fact that you don't hold that above our heads. So, we want to apologise if we ever offended you."
They both bowed in union again.
Seonghwa was speechless. This wasn't what he had expected. But even more so, it wasn't what he wanted. The sudden mature respectful nature actually made him feel queasy and uncomfortable.
"Wooyoung, San, I-"
"I'll go get the belt, hyung," Wooyoung interrupted, before walking around Seonghwa towards the door.
Seonghwa grabbed his arm before he could leave. "Woah, woah, not so quick. You are getting too hasty now."
He narrowed his eyes and glanced back at San. San shifted uneasily and his gaze flickered everywhere but Seonghwa's direction.
Seonghwa sighed. "Okay, you almost had me fooled. Let me guess-" He gently but firmly pushed Wooyoung and San down onto the bed and stood before them. "You planned on being very sincere and apologetic. And then Wooyoung offers to go get the belt, which obviously would make me feel bad and decide to be more lenient because you are so obviously repentant. Or I might be so taken aback that I would forego the entire punishment. Was that the plan?"
Wooyoung let out an even louder sigh. "You could have just pretended to fall for it, hyung. We put a lot of effort into that."
Seonghwa's mouth twitched, but he refrained from smiling. "Listen." He moved closer, crouching back onto his heels so that he was closer to eye level and no longer towering over them. "I am your hyung, but first and foremost, I am Seonghwa. I love messing around with you guys, and I don't want that to stop. And I entirely agree with you both that Manager Ho does not understand us and our relationship with each other. But-" he paused and his expression became a little sterner. "You guys do need to listen when we are out in public. I did ask you to stop fooling around, and because you didn't, my outfit got damaged and Eun-ji noona could have gotten in a lot of trouble for not having it ready in time. Do you understand what I am getting at?"
Wooyoung glanced at San, before they both nodded. Thinking back on the event, they did feel very sorry towards the poor stylist who was already struggling enough.
"And Wooyoung..." Seonghwa paused, unsure of how to put his thoughts into words. "You are right. Manager Ho has hurt us. And I won't sugar coat it. He did abuse...He does abuse us all. But let's not become angry and spiteful people because of it. If we remain calm and respectful, but firm in what we believe, it will just make him look bad in others' eyes. And believe it or not, people like that do get punished in time. I'm not telling you to put up with abuse, I just don't want it to change who you are. If you push his buttons, people will blame you and he will think it justifies his actions. Let's not give him that, okay?"
He bit his lip, as he watched Wooyoung ponder over this. He wasn't even sure if he had worded it the way he meant to. In his mind he knew exactly what he had wanted to say, but it was hard to put it into physical words.
To his relief, Wooyoung nodded. "I think I get it, hyung. I admit I may have overdid it back there. I'm sorry I pulled you into it."
Seonghwa let out a shuddering breath of air as a wave of relief crashed over him. He almost collapsed to the floor, as his legs became weak and numb from it.
"I'll go get the belt," Wooyoung muttered, reluctantly rising to his feet again.
But Seonghwa stopped him once more. "I am not giving you the belt, Wooyoung. Manager Ho said I had to punish you, but he didn't specify how. The two of you will be paying for the damaged outfits and will buy Eun-ji noona a gift as an apology."
"That's not a punishment, hyung," San protested. "We should do that anyway."
Wooyoung poked him in the side, and San's eyes widened slightly.
Seonghwa just shook his head. "I know. But you didn't really do anything wrong, San. Yes, you should have stopped when I asked, but I didn't even try that hard to stop you. Of course you weren't going to take me seriously. Wooyoung, however..." Seonghwa turned to Wooyoung and raised his eyebrows.
"Oh, make up your mind, hyung," Wooyoung whined. "Do I go get a belt or not?"
Seonghwa rolled his eyes. "I am not giving anyone the belt. You can come with me down to my room though. We'll discuss the rest there."
He went to head towards the door when San stopped him.
"Hyung, I don't think it is fair that Wooyoung gets punished alone. I ripped your outfit, and I also spoke back to Manager Ho."
But Seonghwa was already shaking his head. "No, San. You spoke up for yourself and for the team, and everything you said was true. You weren't looking for a reaction as someone else was."
San's bottom lip trembled slightly, but he sat back down on the bed. Wooyoung slapped him heartily on the back, before following Seonghwa out of the room. As they headed down the stairs, he spoke again.
"Are you going to tell Hongjoong?"
Seonghwa glanced at him. "I'm not going to lie to him, but I won't go out of my way to tell him either. But do you really think he won't find out?"
Wooyoung sighed dramatically. "Yeah, he's good at that, isn't he?"
Seonghwa opened up his bedroom door and Wooyoung dragged his feet passed him and into the room. Closing the door behind him, Seonghwa turned to face Wooyoung. His heart was growing heavier as he stared at his mischievous dongsaeng. It had been hard enough having to punish San, Yeosang, and Jongho, but there was just some dreaded fear about having to punish Wooyoung. Maybe it was because Jongho was very mature over taking responsibilities for any wrongdoings, and San and Yeosang never blamed anyone or held grudges.
But with Wooyoung, it was different to Seonghwa. There was a fear of tainting his happy careless nature, and of losing that special playful brotherly bond they had.
He jumped in fright as Wooyoung suddenly reached out and took his hand. And Seonghwa was taken aback by the serious expression on his face. This time, it was completely genuine.
"I'm not going to blame you, hyung. I am not sorry that I hurt the manager's feelings, but I am sorry I acted in a way that gave a bad impression on you as my hyung and on Hongjoong as our leader. I know Hongjoong keeps trying to remind up that our actions can damage our team, and I understand that now. Hyung, I really am sorry."
Feeling emotional at hearing those sincere words, but knowing he couldn't show it now, Seonghwa just nodded stiffly and sat on the bed. Then reaching out, he dragged Wooyoung over his lap.
"There is a time and place for playing around, Wooyoung, and while we are with staff being fitted isn't one of them. I have seen you tickling Yeosang while getting his makeup done, and while I know you are just fooling around with him, did you ever stop to think how hard it makes the staff's job? I am not forbidding you to play around in public. I really don't want you to misunderstand that. Just be aware of whether it will trouble our staff. Okay?"
"Yes, hyung."
"I am not going to punish you for that, just as I am not punishing San. But all that smarth-mouthing is a different question."
Smack!
Wooyoung gritted his teeth together and tears sprang to his eyes. Damn, that really hurt.
Smack! Smack! Smack! Smack! Smack!
"Hyu-hyung," Wooyoung whimpered. The bruise that Manager Ho had left with that single blow was throbbing viciously as if it angered at being disturbed and seeking vengeance.
"How many times do Hongjoong and I have to warn you about angering the manager?" Seonghwa scolded, an angry tone beginning to enter his voice.
Smack! Smack! Smack! Smack!
"I'm sorry, hyung," Wooyoung gasped, his legs beginning to kick involuntarily. "I just don't like him."
"And you think we do?" Seonghwa asked in an exasperated voice.
Smack! Smack! Smack! Smack! Smack!
"Ah-ahhhh." Wooyoung thumped his fist on the mattress, before pressing his hand to his head. Despite Seonghwa not hitting him that hard, the pain was growing unbearable. "Hyungie," he whispered. "Please stop."
But Seonghwa was lost in his own thoughts of how lucky they were the situation hadn't been worse, and didn't notice that the plea was different from Wooyoung's normal loud theatre-worthy acts.
"We can only protect you so much, Wooyoung. But at the end of the day, the manager holds more power than even the leader of the group. Do you know how much Hongjoong worries about this and how much it hurts him when he can't do anything? I know it feels unfair, but for our captain's sake, I wish you wouldn't rile the manager on purpose."
Smack! Smack! Smack! Smack! Smack!.
Wooyoung buried his face deep into the covers, so that Seonghwa would not see his tears. It hurt. It freaking hurt.
"Wooyoung? Wooyoung-ah?"
The concerned voice broke through the cloud of pain, and Wooyoung gasped for air, having almost suffocated himself in the blankets.
"It hurts, hyung," was all he could let out.
Seonghwa took one glance at him and remembered how stiffly Wooyoung had approached him from the car. He mentally berated himself for not having questioned it. He had forgotten all about it when Manager ho had sent a message telling him he had changed his mind and that Seonghwa had to deal with it.
He gently eased the edge of Wooyoung's jeans down an inch, and his heart sank. It was red, welted, and bruised.
"How hard did he hit you, Wooyoung? Why...why didn't you tell me?"
Wooyoung just shook his head. How could he tell Seonghwa that it would have just sounded like an excuse? That he didn't think his hyung would believe him? That he was worried Hongjoong would find out, and the captain would do something terrible? That...that maybe he kind of deserved it for fooling around and offending his hyung?
"Hyung...Hyung, do you really not mind me fooling around with you?"
Seonghwa was startled by the worry in those fearful eyes that watched him carefully. "Wooyoung-ie," he whispered. "Oh, Wooyoung."
He pulled Wooyoung up into his arms and held him tight. A wave of anger surged through him like he had never felt before. It was bad enough that the man had hurt Wooyoung physically, but to cause those doubts were even worse.
But he didn't need to say anything. Wooyoung could feel his answer through that warm secure embrace. He pressed his face against his hyung, and smiled.
* * * * *
Wooyoung had long gone to bed and the dorm had fallen quiet. But the silence was soon disturbed by the front door opening, following by stumbling footsteps and the rustling sound of a plastic bag.
The peaceful darkness was also vanquished as the kitchen light flicked on, and a tall figure slumped into a chair.
They raised the bottle to their lips and emptied it in one long draught. There was a loud click as they pulled off the lip from a new bottle.
One. Two. Three.
The empty bottles lined up like a parade of soldiers standing at attention.
Then the figure buried their face into their folded arms and sobbed bitterly. Their shoulders ached from all the responsibility that weighed down upon them, and their guilt-ridden heart hurt all the more.
"It's hard, Hongjoong-ah," Seonghwa whispered. "It's hard being a hyung."