Soojins POV
I feel dread as I watch Jennies car leave, somethings off and we both know it. I just hope she can wait.
"That wasn't your manager" my mum ask as we start to set the table.
"No it wasn't" I reply flatly.
"Who was it?" I sigh and stand to look at her.
"Jennies manager" she pauses what she's doing.
"You still hangout with her?" her voice surprising soft.
"Yeah, only recently though" I reply quietly suddenly nervous for the interrogation.
"I'm glad, she was always a good influence." I look up finally making eye contact and she's smiling softly at me.
"And she makes you happy" I stay silent and continue setting up the table, she laughs lightly after I accidentally knock over the cups flustered by what she's said.
"I went to the dorm the other day looking for you, Miyeon told me that you haven't been at home for a while" I look up in shock and she has a teasing smirk on her face.
"W-what"
"Soojin, it's okay you're an adult now and I need to apologise to you" she sighs suddenly shifting the mood, she sits down and motions me to do the same.
"I haven't always been the most supportive parent, the last time we talked really made me realise how much I've hurt you. I know honey and I'm okay with it I always have been but I was so afraid of what would happen to you if people found out so I acted the way I did and i'm sorry." she says with tears in her eyes and my own are forming.
"It's no excuse for how I've made you feel but I want to be open with you and tell you that no matter who you love I will always support and love you."
"Mum" I say breathless moving to hug her, she hugs me just as tight. I feel an overwhelming rush of relief and happiness. I didn't even realise how much I needed her support until this moment. We're both crying but I know from happiness and forgiveness. We pull away smiling brightly.
"Now we can finally talk about your love life!" she says excitedly. I giggle by her reaction.
"Well it's a mess at the moment that's for sure." She nods her head in understanding.
"Uh let me guess Jennie and Shuhua?" I nod my head sadly.
"Do you love them?" she says softly.
"Yes" I say quietly.
"Do you love them in the same way" I shake my head no unable to say the words.
"Then you know what you have to do" she says rubbing my cheek.
"But I'm going to hurt her" I say with more tears.
"Maybe, but honey we only live one life and we're lucky if we even get to love. So when you have it don't let it go" I hug her tightly and cry into her neck. I know what I have to do and I think I've always known.
"Thank you mum" I truthfully say.
"No need to thank me my baby, now come lets eat"
...................................
After resting at my parents house I've made my way to the dorms, waiting outside the door nervously. I take a deep breath and go inside, I know Shuhuas here and I've asked Miyeon if she can go out for a bit so I know its just me and her.
But when I open the door I didn't expect to see a crying Shuhua. Alarmed I make my way over to her.
"Shu" I say worried. she looks up at me with tears glassy eyes.
"Jinjin"
"Honey what's wrong"
"M-minnie's left"
"Hey I'm sure she'll be back soon Shu don't worry" I say a confused frown forming
"No unnie you don't understand, she's gone to Thailand" Her voice cracks and she plants her face in her palms. A note falls as she moves.
"What? Shu even if she's left i'm sure its only to visit"
"Y-you don't understand she left because of me" and I finally realise. I sigh and bring her in closer.
"Shu we should talk" She pulls away slowly and looks at me.
"I think we do" She replies. We both sit up straight but still hold hands just staring at each other.
"Ugh, this sucks" I say suddenly feeling emotional, she chokes up as well even more than before.
"Shu I love you so much" I say through the tears.
"And everything we've been through and done I have cherished so much. I really do love you but I think. I think that we should go back to the way we were before" my voice cracks as I say it. More tears fall from my eyes, my heart is breaking saying these words but it's the truth.
She doesn't say anything just yet, but nods her head holding my hand tighter.
"unnie I love you so much, I've always loved you but." she turns away from me not able to say the words. She seems puzzled by her own words and I can understand.
"I know shu, I know" she looks at me again with such a pained expression.
"Shu I loved you, when we were together I really did love you. But I want to be honest." I take a breath trying to calm down.
"I'm in love with Jennie" I say through the tears.
"I know.... And I'm in love with Minnie" She says back just as emotional. We both stay silent just holding each other.
"You should go after her" I whisper in her ear. She looks at me sadly.
"I've hurt her to much, she said that she's leaving because of me. I hurt her so much she can't even be around me anymore" I hold her tighter feeling devastated for them both.
"Shu buy a ticket and go after her, you can't not try you both deserve to be together" I say honestly. She stares at me for a moment like she's contemplating.
"I'm scared" I look at how how vulnerable she looks and it reminds me of how she was when we were younger.
"We're all scared Shu, it's just about doing it despite everything."
"Now start packing you're going after Minnie, I'll sort out the ticket now go" she smiles and hesitantly gets up.
"Jinjin, I really love you" she says truthfully. I smile relieved.
"I really love you too" She smiles back adorably and runs to pack. I'm left alone in the lounge savouring this moment, the words I just said to Shu hitting me. I'm scared too and despite everything that has happened I undeniably love Jennie.
I need to fight for her too.
...........................
" It feels weird how normal this feels" Shuhua says as we travel in the car to the airport.
"A little but it's us we will always be there for each other" I say truthfully. She smiles and holds my hand.
"I know we spoke about everything that's happened but I want you to know I really did love you when we were together" shuhua voices.
"I know shu and so did I"
"Can I ask when you knew you loved Minnie" she looks a little uncomfortable but this is new territory between us.
"Hey it's okay you don't need to worry"
"Well I think truthfully... I may have always liked her, once you left and she told me how she felt i think everything just pieced together. And to be honest I always liked you so it was easy realising my feelings but with Minnie it was so different."
"Different in a good way?" She turns to look at me with a relaxed smile.
"Yes, in a good way"
"I'm not upset but you and Jennie, was it during us..?"
"Shu no, when we were together it was always you and me. I was with you and only you, it was just such a mess because she came back, but I promise during us it was just you I wanted. I do want to tell you the truth when we went on our break Jennie made a deal with me." I sigh at the mention of the deal.
" She would leave me alone if I stayed with her during the time me and you were apart. She just wanted to say goodbye one last time and would never speak to me again and not interrupt whatever we had . I knew that she was a big reason me and you broke up so I agreed, it sounds crazy now I think about it but I said yes and well..."
"You fell in love" she says smiling . I cringe by her words but nod my head.
"That's dedication from Jennie I must say" she replies laughing
"hmm she's something" I say smiling at the thought of her.
"I'm happy for you Jin, some of things I did were so horrible and I want to say how sorry I am " She says emotionally.
"Hey we both did things that hurt each other, I'm sorry too but let's move on and be best friends like we always have been. Cause shu you're still everything to me, my soulmate and I love you so much."
"Soulmates forever" she says cheesily, bringing her pinky finger to seal the deal.
"Soulmates forever" I repeat rolling my eyes.
"Promise"
"Promise" I say meaning it. We both smile warmly.
"Now time to get your girl" I say as we pull up to the airport. She takes a big breath.
"Bye jin, and you too" We hug and she leaves I watch as she goes.
Now time to find Jennie.
....................................
I make my way to jennies with a calmness that wasn't there before. Everything's out in the open now, and me and Shu are okay the girl who means so much to me is still here, we've both found love even if it's not with each other.
And Jennie she fills my heart with a sense of wholeness and contentment that I've never experienced before, my love for her overwhelms me in the best possible way and i'm no longer afraid of admitting it.
But as we pull up to the gate I feel a sense of dread looking at the dark house not a single light on. My heart starts to pound in anticipation I knew something was off when we parted. The uber driver stops the car, I don't bother to say thank you to the driver already running out of the car to the front door. I unlock the house with shaky hands, the place completely dark and silent.
"Jennie!" I shout walking briskly to the lounge area but no response, I move to our bedroom and what really alarms me is the empty closet with all of her things. No I think starting to panic. I pull out my phone and try to call her but nothing. The line doesn't even go through meaning she's blocked me. I move to the kitchen checking if anythings missing, it looks like she's left everything besides her clothes and photos.
"Fuck" I sigh and that's when I see it. A letter with my name on the front page. I rush to the letter and clumsily open it.
As I read it's bitter sweet she's keeping her word but again she's leaving without saying a goodbye.
Not again
With determination I grab my phone and call Lisa.
"Hello?"
"Lisa! is Jennie with you"
"Uh no" Fuck if she's not at the dorms where the hell is she.
"Do you know where she is" I say in a rush starting to panic feel like she's slipping away from me.
"Soojin what's going on?"
"Lisa please I need to know where she is"
"Wait did she not tell you?" she says quietly.
"TELL ME WHAT LISA"
"She's leaving to America for a couple of months to film a show, she only agreed yesterday" I stand in shock, not knowing how to process that.
"Lisa when does she leave"
"Uh tomorrow morning I think, wait I'm not sure maybe today I'll try calling her but go to her mums house that's where she was staying before"
"Okay thank you bye" I quickly hang up and call a taxi. I feel powerlessness right now. It feels like the person I love is gradually moving further away, and there's little I can do to stop it.
It starts to rain as I jump into the taxi, each minute passing growing worse. I try calling Jennie again but the same thing happens.
"Fuck" I say helplessly. The driver looks at me quizzing but I don't care how I look at the moment. We finally arrive at her parents house, like her house no our house its hidden with tall hedges and a gate that blocks people from coming in.
"Miss are you sure you want to go out in this weather" he ask concerned.
"I'm fine, thank you" I give him cash and rush out of the car, the coldness of the rain sends shivers down my spine but I rush to the gate and thankfully I remember the pin. It opens and I start to run down the large driveway, my clothes are completely soaked my hair is sticking to my face but I don't care.
There are no cars in the enormous driveway but I'm hoping that's just because they're inside the garage. I make it to the front door out of breath, I frantically pound on the front door not caring if her parents are home and they can hear me.
"Jennie!" I shout still pounding on the door but nothing. Again i knock and knock until my knuckles turn red, but still no one answers. I stop and stare at the door breathing heavily waiting .
My eyes move around frantically trying to figure out what to do. I knock again and again but it's hopeless she's not here.
She's not here, and it hits me that no ones going to open that door. Jennies not going to open that door and she's gone. She's gone and I can't do anything about it. The tears fall as I stand still in the rain feeling numb and cold.
I'm too late.
......................................