"I was thinking" telling Felix as we are in my room, we're under my covers "maybe we could go to Jacksonville and meet my mom and Phil"
"Your saying we" he says
"I guess I am" nodding head, I've been thinking about it and I'm going to go for it "Felix? Do you want to go on a date with me? Like see a movie? That Fast and Furious movie is out"
He smiles "I would love to" smiling brightly, I lean into his embrace and go to sleep. His scent of black amber, dark plum and spice is the last thing I think of before sleeping.
"Mmmm" moaning as the white sheet covers my body, a smile is on my face as my mouth is opened a bit. My heart beats hard as my breath raspy.
Under the sheet, Felix's head pops up from when he was kissing a trail up my body and we smile at one another. Placing my hand on his cheek, he leans up to capture my lips with his own.
Pulling away since I need air, our foreheads pressed together. I breathe out with my eyes closed "I love you"
"Wow" pulling away startled, I look over to see Johnny by the door with hir arms crossed "I'm not even dead for a year and you've moved on?"
"My sister" looking over to see Bella with green skin, red hair and red eyes walk over to Johnny with four extra arms on either side of her body "has always been like that. A bitch. It's why no one will ever truly love her" I watch as they kiss, tears run down my face "deep down" Bella pulls away and starts to dance moving her arms all around as she also twirks while weirdly dancing with her upper hand of her body "she knows it. She doesn't deserve love"
I gasp awake when I'm shook awake, looking around I see I'm in my room and the kittens are all on their little cat tree. Next to me is Felix who looks at me worried "Are you alright?" He whispers
"Just a dream" whispering, placing my hand to my face I feel the wet tears "I'm going to get some water" getting up and out of bed, I grab some water from the kitchen needing a moment to myself. Should I have not asked Felix out? Oh god.
~School~
"Who was the guy you were with?" Lauren asks me as soon as I arrive to school, but instead of answering I push her, Angela and Jessica into the school. Jessica keeps asking what's going on but I won't say. Checking each stall to make sure it's empty before locking the door "what's going on?"
"Promise you won't tell anyone" I ask, they nod their heads "I mean it Jessica"
"I promise" she nods her head
"I had a dream" I tell her
Lauren gives me a look "This isn't one of them speeches"
Shaking my head "No!" Holding my hands up "I had a sex dream about Felix the guy who you all saw me leaving"
The girls smile as Angela says "Do continue"
"I'm the dream I told him that I loved him" telling her.
"Ooh" the girls say
"Then Johnny showed up" any amusement went away "he looked at me all disgusted and betrayed, then Bella showed up saying I was like that. But Bella looked like Poison Ivy with green skin, red hair and red eyes but she had an extra set of five arms" or was it four? It started with an f "the two then kissed and after dream Bella said that I don't deserve love and I never did before dancing all weirdly with the twirking and"
"Hold up" Lauren stops me "how did this dream even happen? I mean you don't talk about your crazy dreams, ever" yeah at some sleepovers I've had with them, I've had pretty crazy dreams causing me to laugh in the real world.
"The big guy? Felix? I asked him out"
"You did?!" They exclaim happily
"Took your guys's advice and asked him out" waving my hand "now I'm having crazy dreams"
"This might be your subconscious" Angela says "telling you that you think your betraying Johnny by going out so soon after his death"
"Maybe talk to his parents" Jessica suggests "have you talked to them since his death?"
I shake my head no. His mom called me weeks age telling me that she found something that she wanted me to have. "Maybe I will"
"Do it" they wave to my phone "now"
"Okay" mouthing as I pull out my phone and call Mrs. O'Conner.
"Hello" she answers
"Mrs. O'Conner? It's Hela" nervousness creeps all over my body "Helena Swan"
"Hela!" She exclaims in joy "It's so good to hear from you, how are you?"
"Meh, not good or bad" I say "how are you? Your husband?"
"My husband and I are getting by" she tells me "I'm guessing this is about the message I left a few weeks ago"
"Yeah" I answer "I'm sorry I couldn't get to you sooner. Life has been crazy"
"With Bella?" She asks "I heard you were in charge with punishing her every day?"
"Yeah" I answer
"I wanted to let you know that Mr. O'Conner and I recently moved but we found a box of things between you and Johnny that I felt you should have" she says
Tears are in my eyes and the girls are curious as to what is going on "Really?"
"Are you crying?" She asks
"No" lying to her and myself "I'm sorry. I'm having a my own little dilemma"
"You can tell me" she says
"There is this guy who has been helping me" I tell her "I met him in Florida at a grief group for those who lost a spouse. My mom thought it would be best if I went to one of those even though Johnny and I weren't married"
"But you did act it" Mrs. O'Conner cuts me off "but back to the guy?"
"I have been thinking about him and less of Johnny" I say "and I feel like I'm betraying Johnny since I'm thinking about another guy so soon after his death" the first bell rings.
"Keep talking" Jessica mouths "we'll talk at lunch" she leaves with Laurene whole Angela stays. We have study hall right now.
"Your not betraying my son" Mrs. O'Conner says "because what happened wasn't your fault, it was that wolf's fault. Johnny would want you to be happy, it's okay to move on from Johnny. Johnny was your first love but he won't be your last. Listen I've got to go soon but I'd like to hear from you again, the box I mailed to you so it should be arriving today"
"Thank you" I say "I'll call when I can" hanging up I look at Angela "Mrs. O'Conner found a box of Johnny's things that she wanted me to have"
"That was sweet of her" we leave the bathroom "what did she say about dating?"
"She gave me her blessing" I say "that Johnny would want me to be happy"