Tw: Very serious abuse, sa etc mentions in this chapter
It had been a really big adjustment welcoming all the Woodbury people here with us. Tyreese and Sasha had been in Woodbury and so they did get to stay here with us after all. They along with my sisters moved into our cell block and then we all helped clear the prison and the new people got the other cell blocks.
The field was clear again too meaning I spent lots of my time out running, Rick spent a lot of time in the field too, he'd become quite the farmer no longer our leader he spent his time outside relaxing. It was good for him. Because Rick had resigned we now had a council, I'd been elected to join the council with my friends but I had declined. I didn't want a role in leadership either, I just liked to help out wherever I could.
Daryl and I had only been getting closer to each other we were basically a couple, neither of had said it but we just both knew. I was actually thinking of asking him if he wanted to share a cell with me soon.
Aelia had really settled in with everyone, she got along best with Beth, Maggie and Glenn, she still completely hated Daryl I'm not sure why. Aurora still wasn't completely warmed up to me, it'd been a few months but both of my sisters were still mourning my mom hard. I wasn't mourning as hard as them because I'd mourned her twice already before this, it just wasn't as hard on me because I didn't even get to see her again for long before I lost her again.
"Hey we're goin on a run, you wanna come?" Daryl asks stopping by me as I'm getting ready to run in the field. "Uh, no not this time." I shrug, I did love going out on runs, especially with Daryl but Aelia wanted me to spend the day with Aurora today so I should probably stay here. "Alright I'll be back soon."
"Stay safe." He nods and kisses my forehead like he always did before he had to leave. "Always am."
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"Hey Jude." I smile at the baby who I spent most of my time around, I swear if we had assigned jobs in here mine would be babysitter for the grimes. "Have you seen Aurora?" I ask Beth who shakes her head. "No, I think she was with Sophia." If she was with Sophia then they were probably in the library. It was Sophia's favourite place in the entire prison.
"Hey guys." Aurora practically scowls when she sees me, I was sure that she hated me actually. "Um you wanna hang out kid?" I ask Aurora who reluctantly nods. "You wanna come too Soph?" She looks between us then shakes her head. "I actually have to go find my mom, you guys have fun." She says before leaving us alone.
"You like reading?" I ask Aurora who shrugs, "I don't know." It was like talking to brick wall, the kid wanted nothing to do with me. "You wanna come and help me farm with Rick?" She may have hated me but she sure did love Rick. Her face lights up just at the mention of him and she nods making me smile. "Alright let's go."
"Hey farmer." Rick chuckles as he looks up at the sound of my voice. "Well if isn't my two favourite helpers." He hums leaning against his gardening tool. "More like your only helpers." I say leaning against the small pen he was in. Aurora climbs up on the wood beside me. "How can we help today Rick?" She asks swinging over the top of the fence.
He gives her some tool and tells her to go dig out weeds or something, I'm not sure since I wasn't really paying attention. "So I take it you're still having problems connecting with her." He asks as I take to sitting on the top of the fence. "I'm telling you the kid hates me." He nods and listens to me speak as he continues with his farming work.
"Selene can you come and help me please." Rick turns to me as we hear Aurora call for me, "well you never know, seems like she's coming around." Rick says raising his brows as I hop off the fence. "Yeah we'll see."
"What's up?" I ask the young girl as I crouch down in the dirt beside her. "This one is too heavy." She mumbles through gritted teeth as she tries with all her might to pull the root out. "Too heavy?" I ask with a laugh. "Don't laugh at me, I'm not strong enough." I nod and pull my knife out, "don't worry about it kid you'll get stronger in no time." I tell her as I begin using my blade to cut away bits of the root so we can pull it out. "Are you sure?" She asks, I smile over at her seeing her genuine curiosity and not that look of annoyance she usually has when looking at me.
"Hell yeah, you think I was born this strong?" I ask, "you don't look that strong." I laugh and lift her up in my arms. "Well I'm strong enough to carry you aren't I?" She giggles as I flip her upside down, "hey let me down!" She protests through laughter.
"How come you like helping Rick out with all this work? Non of the other kids do." I ask as I let her down, her expression falls slightly. "I used to help mommy in the garden before we had to move to Woodbury." I frown slightly and get back down to her height, "and you like gardening because it reminds you of mom?" She nods and picks her little shovel up as she goes back to stabbing the soil. "What did you like to grow in the garden? When I was still at home mom tried to grow tomatoes, they never ended up right and she used to get so mad because dad would have tomato fights with me and Lia and we'd make a big mess." She giggles, "daddy was so silly." I nod with my own laugh.
"Me and mommy grew flowers, lots of flowers. We had a small sunflower garden because she said they were your favourite flower." I nod with a soft smile, "they still are." She grins at me, "they're my favourite flowers too!" I feel glad that we're finally bonding about something.
"Hey you know what, next time I go on a run I'll see if I can find us some flower seeds and then we can plant a little flower garden over there." She looks up at me her wide eyes hopeful, "really?" I nod and then she throws her arms around me. "Oh thank you, you're the best big sister ever. I'm sorry I was mean to you." I shake my head, "it's fine kid don't even worry about it." Then we get back to gardening, Aurora is now way more open with me and talks the entire time we work together.
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"Hey." It was nearing evening and we were all back in the cell block getting ready for bed. "Hey, you're back late." I hum as Daryl walks into my cell, he'd been getting back late quiet a bit recently. "I was just helping Rick out with something." He mumbles shrugging, I don't think much of it. "How was the run?" I ask as he sits beside me on my bunk. "Same as always, I got you something." I sit up and look at him a smile taking over my face. "Ooh you shouldn't have." He shrugs and reaches into his pocket and hands me a little bag.
"Oh Daryl this is perfect." He smiles as I grab his face and press kisses all to his cheek. "Yeah?" I nod and look at the necklace in my hands. "Yeah, now come put it on for me." I say grabbing him by the hand and pulling him up.
The necklace he'd gotten for me is a small little moon charm, it's so small and dainty that it rests above my locket perfectly. The two complimenting each other in the best way. "How was your day." He asks as I pull the small charm between my fingers.
"Oh it was actually really good, I finally found something to help me bond with Aurora, she likes gardening so I told her that I'd try find some flowers for us to plant on our next run." Daryl nods, "that's good, I told you it'd be any day now." He says brushing my hair out of my face. "What flowers?"
"Huh?"
"What flowers does she like, I'll keep an eye out next time I'm out." If the perfect man did exist that man would be Daryl Dixon without a doubt. "Sunflowers." I tell him, "oh like you."
"It's still weird to think that she's my sister, I mean I'm old enough to be her mom." I say before my good mood dampens slightly, "what's wrong?" He asks making me shake my head, "nothing." I mumble running my tongue across the inside of my cheek. "Is this about..." I nod, "my daughter would've been her age." He nods in understanding before we hear a voice at the door.
"You have a daughter?" My mouth parts in shock once I see Aelia. "Had." I answer awkwardly looking down. The day we merged with Woodbury she told me that she understood, that she wouldn't pry on my past but she just couldn't help it. She'd asked so many times since and I just knew that she was about to ask again.
She took it personally that I didn't want to tell her, it wasn't personal though or maybe it was but I just didn't feel comfortable and I didn't get why she couldn't just accept that. The difference was she wanted me to tell her everything but the others were just willing to be there in case I wanted to talk about it on my terms. There were things I hadn't told anyone, of course there was it was a decade of torture and there were things I'd even blocked from my own memory.
"Look Aelia, this is not the time." I didn't want to ruin the good day I'd just had. "I just don't get why you'll tell him but you won't tell me." I shake my head. "Just leave it alone please." The determined fire is set in her eyes so I know she won't and this will end in an argument.
"Selene I just-"
"She told you to leave it alone." Daryl growls from behind me, he didn't like my sister much either. That was one thing they had in common. "Nobody was speaking to you, so mind your own business." He scoffs at her words, they were pretty hypocritical. "Why don't you mind yours." He fires back making her eyes narrow.
"She's my sister you disgusting red neck. I don't know how you've manipulated her but I won't let you take advantage of her any-"
"Hey!" My voice raises which surprises her as I cut her off. "Stop talking Aelia, you don't know what you're talking about. Do not accuse him of taking advantage of me again." I say as Daryl has gone still in shock. I was surprised he hadn't gotten angry, he was pretty quick to lose his temper in a situation like this.
"I'm going to get some fresh air." I say before turning to Daryl, I felt bad about what my sister had said. I could tell it'd affected him, I could practically see her words running on replay in his mind. "Come with me." I say softly as I take his hand in mine. He meets my eye and nods, still not seeming all there.
"Do not just walk away right now." I sigh and drop Daryl's hand as Aelia follows us down the stairs. "Aelia please, I'm tired and I do not want to do this now." I practically beg her, I'm especially hating this because I can see everyone leaving their cells at our commotion.
"I'm sorry what I just said upset you, I know you care about Daryl but-"
"Aelia don't." I'm really starting to lose my patience with her and I honestly feel as though I'm nearing my breaking point. "Selene, I'm your sister I just want to help you. I just want to understand you, what happened. I spent ten years thinking about you, you aren't the only one who suffered those ten years."
"I'm not the only one who suffered?" I'm in disbelief that she just said that, "you think I don't know that? Why do you think I don't want to tell you what happened to me? I'm still trying to protect you but you really wanna know? You want to 'understand' me? Okay, you want me to tell you that at first he starved me most days, that if I really wanted to eat I had to beg him and even then my meal would be food he'd chewed and spit back up. He told me that if I was really hungry I'd eat it or I wasn't hungry enough and could go a few more days without food. He never stopping using that as a punishment. Speaking of punishments you want to hear about how if he thought I was taking too long on the toilet he'd rip me off and hold my head in the bowl? You want me to tell you that he'd almost drown me in my own piss and shit?"
I see the negative effect this is having on her but I'm too angry and upset to care so I keep going. "That enough for you or should I keep going? You wanna hear about the freezer? How he'd lock me in an old little freezer for hours until I'd screamed my throat raw. I died down there Aelia, not in a metaphorical sense either, he killed me and brought me back to prove that I couldn't escape him, not even with death. I tried it, to kill myself, it never fucking worked. So I was stuck there, handcuffed to a fucking pipe on the wall, I was cuffed to that wall for a decade. You wanna hear about my almost daily beatings? How when Daryl found me he thought I was a walker because any visible skin was discoloured with bruises upon bruises."
"And you wanna know about my daughter? He was a man who got me pregnant and then... he killed my babies because he said I wasn't allowed to love anything more than him." My anger has dissolved into full fledged grief and regret.
"You want more stories like that because I've got plenty." She shakes her head as tears spill over her eye lids and pour down her face. "Was this everything you hoped it'd be? Do you understand me now? Are you happy?" I'm finding it hard to feel sympathy for her right now as she sniffles. "I understand that you suffered with losing me but don't you dare ever say that I'm not the only person who suffered, again. What we went through is not comparable at all. All I did was fucking suffer."
With that I turn and grab Daryl's hand and then walk us outside for that fresh air that I desperately needed.