"You're going to church?"
When I told Kate where I was going, she was a caught off guard. She gave me a confused look, then looked me up and down before crossing her arms.
"Amaya invited me."
"Ok, when can I meet her?"
"I don't know. We're not dating." I said, making her stare at me as I was sliding my shoes on. I saw her look me up and down before meeting my eyes, which I knew she was questioning why I was dressed like this.
"You're wearing that to church?"
"Amaya said I could wear whatever."
"But it's church." I shrugged as she kept looking me over, clearly confused but I ignored her as I looked at myself in the mirror.
I sprayed myself down with perfume, but not a lot before fixing my hair. I was wearing it up, but I was making sure my curly hair was ok in the back.
"You look cute. Amaya must be something special to be able to get you to go to church. You haven't went in years."
I sighed as I looked over at her. "I know, and I'm nervous."
"It's ok." She smiled.
"You do remember what happened last time I was in church, right?"
"This one might be different."
"You don't know that." I said.
She slightly smiled. "What about Amaya. She's gay, and she's going to church."
"What if they don't know she's gay? What if she introduces me as her friend, and it makes things weird?"
"You think?" Kate asks. "You think Amaya hides her sexuality from church?"
"I mean.. I would. They're not friendly when it comes to that."
Kate nods before slightly smiling. "Let me know how it goes." She said, then looked me over. "You should change your shirt though."
"Why?" I looked down at myself.
"Cause you shouldn't wear a graphic tee in a church."
"I don't own anything nice."
She smiles before motioning for me to follow her. I followed her up the stairs, and towards her room before walking inside.
I stood there as she was looking through her closet, then pulled out a while, long-sleeve button up. It looked like a man shirt, but Kate smiled at me once she saw my face.
"It's mine. It's a women's shirt."
"It looks gay."
"Well.. unless you want to wear a dress."
I quickly grabbed the shirt and thanked her. I saw her smile as I walked back to my room, and continued to get dressed.
As I stood in front of the mirror, I looked myself over before sighing. I messed with my hair a little more before nodding in aprroval.
After I had everything ready, I grabbed my phone and texted Amaya. I told her I was on the way, and when I looked at the time, it was a little before eight.
When I walked out of the room, Mason was walking towards the kitchen before seeing me and stopping. I saw him look me up and down before smiling.
"You look good." He said, making me nod. "When Kate told me where you were going, I was caught off guard a little. I thought you didn't believe?"
"I don't. But I want to go with Amaya." I said, seeing him smile.
"Have fun." He said before walking away.
Then, Asher came running towards me and jumping into my arms. I held him and looked at him before seeing him smile at me.
"Where you going?"
"I'm going to hang out with a friend." I said.
"The new one?" He said, making me nod. "I wanna meet them!"
"You will."
Asher looks at me for a moment. "Bring them over, please." He held my face. "Please, Aunt Remi."
"I will, booger. I promise."
After I placed him down, he ran away and I said my goodbyes to Kate as I walked out of the door. I heard her tell me to have a good time, but all I did was roll my eyes.
My nerves were shot though cause I didn't like churches, and I had a pretty bad experience with them when I was younger, so I never went back to one.
That day I went to grab something for Mason, was the last time I was hoping to go, which I was completely wrong.
Amaya was definitely changing me in ways that I didn't even know cause I'm a little curious about the Bible, but then again when I'm not around her, I don't care about it.
It's weird.
As I was driving, I tried calming my nerves as I was reaching Amaya's house quicker. I pulled into her driveway before parking, and stared at the house before getting out.
I walked to the front door, then knocked and waited for Alina to answer the door.
The door opened after a moment, and Alina smiled at me before inviting me inside. I nodded at her as I saw her in a dress, which made me look like I needed to change.
But thankfully, my sister came through, and let me borrow one of her shirts that I didn't mind wearing, but it looked a little too gay to be wearing at a church.
"You look cute." Alina said as I was following her to the living room.
"Thanks." I said as I looked around for Amaya. "Where's Amaya?"
Alina smiled at me before stopping. "She's getting ready. The church services don't start until nine, but Amaya likes to go there early to help everyone."
I nod as I looked around before looking back at her. "I haven't went in years."
"Amaya said you didn't believe."
She looks at me as I nod, then I looked away to avoid eye contact. "Yeah.." I looked around the living room before Alina excused herself and left.
My hands were shaking, and my knees were sweating in these pants. I tried calming myself down but nothing was helping cause I was nervous as hell.
Churches never were something I liked cause of the people. They all criticize everyone, and I never did like it.
Then there was the painful experience I had the last time I went that made me dislike it even more.
Something about them makes my skin crawl, and I knew it had something to do with sin.
But what I'm curious about is Amaya.
She believes and goes to church, but yet she's into me. I want to know how to thinks about that, and how she manages to keep going to church after everything.
Then, I want to know if her church knows her sexuality and if they're ok with it, which I find hard to believe if they are.
It makes no sense, but I guess today I'll have the answers.
Hopefully.
As I was looking around, I saw the bookshelf then walked towards it. I noticed there were a lot of different books, and it made me curious as to how much she reads.
I knew that she couldn't do much around here, so I guess she reads to pass the time and entertain herself.
I looked around some more before seeing Amaya come into the living room. She was wearing a pink and white dress, and her hair was down in waves.
I was completely in awe as I stared at her once she approached me with a smile on her face.
"Hey."
"You look beautiful." I said out loud.
She blushed then smiled at me. "Thank you. You look beautiful as well." She said as she looked me over.
"This is my sisters shirt." I pointed out. "I didn't have anything." I saw her smile as she looked up at me.
"It looks good."
Alina came back in after a moment then asked if we were ready to leave. I followed Amaya outside as Alina was locking the doors behind us, and we went towards her car.
"Alina can help me in, Remi. You don't need to." Amaya said as I was ready to get her into the passenger seat.
I nodded before stepping aside as Alina got Amaya in, then I hopped into the backseat before shutting the door.
Once we were all in, Alina left the driveway and got onto the road. I was trying to calm down as Amaya was talking to Alina, and I was staring out the window.
My leg was shaking, and I wish it would stop. I tried keeping my mind away from everything, but it was hard.
Everything was rushing past me.
After a few minutes, we were pulling into the church. I looked around and saw how many people were here, making me regret this decision as I got out.
Alina was helping Amaya as I was looking around. I saw many people with their kids and family, walking inside as I was standing there.
I followed them inside after a moment, and I felt my nerves go completely crazy as we walked into the doors.
The small room in the front that greeted everyone was bright, and filled with flowers. I saw a big Bible in the center, opened as many people were taking different entrances into the main part.
It split off into the door open areas that lead to the main room, and people were walking in.
I was behind them, trying to keep my nerves down and not make eye contact. I looked at the floor then looked around for a moment before looking back down.
Once we stopped, Alina excused herself as Amaya looked over at me. She smiled before turning towards me, making me look down at her.
"Are you ok?" I nodded, but she knew something was wrong. "I didn't want you to come if you were uncomfortable, Remi. I just wanted to ask if you want join me."
"It's fine."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
She slightly smiled before looking somewhere, and I did the same before seeing a man walk towards us. He was the same man that I encountered that day that I was here, and he leaned over to hug Amaya.
"Brother Smith, how are you?"
"I'm good." He smiles before looking at me. "I see you brought your friend here." He held out his hand, and I shook it.
Amaya smiles at us. "Well, Remi is more than a friend." She said, making me look at her.
"Oh?" The man smiled before looking over at me. "Girlfriend?"
"Something like that." Amaya said. "We are seeing each other."
The man smiled then held out his hand towards me once more, then shook it.
"Welcome to the family, Remi." He said.
After he left, I was confused as I stood there for a moment then saw more people coming up to Amaya. I saw them hug her, asking her how she was before she introduced me to them.
Amaya never once told anyone that I was just a friend. She mentioned me as someone she was seeing, and everyone greeted me with a hand shake.
It was weird.
"I can tell you're nervous." Amaya said as I sat down in a pew. "It's ok." She reaches over and grabs my hand, making me look around. "No one is judging us, Remi." Amaya said, making me look at her. "Is that why you're nervous?"
"Something like that." I said, making sure not to mention my past.
"They're all loving here." She said, but I kept looking around. "Remi?" I look at Amaya as she was leaning towards me, making my eyes widen.
Then, she kisses me.
In front of everyone.
I panicked and looked around, but nobody was paying attention.
I didn't see nobody yell disgusting words or threaten to send me to hell. I didn't see an angry man and woman tell us that their children shouldn't see that.
Nobody was angry.
Amaya looked at me with a smile, making all my nerves completely disappear.
Alina came back after a moment, then the service started.
It was a nice service, and I paid attention to everything as I listened.
He introduced me again to everyone, and I was completely caught off guard when he said, "Amaya's girlfriend."
That made Amaya squeeze my hand as I looked over at her.
When the service was over, I felt something weird inside of me. I didn't understand it before Amaya was grabbing my hand, and taking my attention away from the feeling, and towards her.
Everyone greeted everyone once more before it was time to leave.
"What did you think?" Amaya asks as we were by the car, waiting for Alina.
"I liked it." I said, which made her smile.
"Really?" She asks.
"Yeah.. it was soothing." I said.
She smiles before grabbing my hand and holding it. "I'm so glad."
Alina came after a few minutes, then placed Amaya into the passenger seat. I hopped into the back, and we left after a few minutes.
"Y'all hungry?" Alina asks.
We all went into town to grab something to eat. We went through a drive-thru cause Alina was in a hurry to get back home.
Once we arrived at the house, I waited outside the car as Alina was helping Amaya out. I followed her towards the house then inside once Alina unlocked the door.
We walked into the kitchen and ate, which I kept catching Amaya look at me. I saw her stare then look away when I would look over at her.
After we ate, Amaya and I went into the living room. I sat next to her as she was talking about the service, and I couldn't help but smile.
"I'm glad you liked it."
"Me too."
"I also wanted to ask you something." She said as she grabbed my hand. I kept looking at her as she was looking down at our hands before looking at me. "Will you be mine?"
That made me smile like I never smiled before, and I saw Amaya smiling as well.
"Yeah." I said, making her grab my shirt and pull me towards her.
Our lips touched, and she smiled against them before pulling back. I couldn't help but stare at her then heard Alina in the kitchen.
"Amaya, phone call."
After she left, I sat there with a smile on my face as I looked out the window. I heard noises before looking over to see Amaya come back into the living room.
"I have a doctors appointment." She said. "I'll text you though." She smiled.
Alina was standing at the entrance, watching us as I nodded towards Amaya.
"I had a great time, and I'm glad you did too." She said as she followed me to the front door.
"Me too." I said.
Once we were outside, I leaned over to kiss her. She smiled once we pulled back then we said our goodbyes.
After I left, I couldn't help but smile. But then something wasn't settling in my stomach for some reason.
It didn't settle with me that Amaya asked me to be her girlfriend so soon, and how I had to leave all of sudden cause she had a doctors appointment.
But I shook my thoughts away as I drove home with Amaya on my mind.