"It's still crowded as before. Walang pinagkaiba sa Pilipinas." Komento ni Saph habang tumitingin sa paligid. "People still minding their own businesses and don't give a shit about anyone else's."
Naroon sila sa Siam, isang distrito sa Bangkok, Thailand. Tiningala niya ang mga mall na nagtataasan at mga gusali na wala pa noon.
"Still a busy neighborhood, huh?" Si Nate na panay din ang paglilibot ng mga mata. "Remember when we used to do some pick-pocketing here?" Sabay turo sa isang eskinita kung saan may mga nadali sila noon upang dukutan.
"Yeah." Aniya habang inaalala ang tagpong iyon. "Para lang meron tayong pambili ng mainit na sabaw para sa kumakalam nating sikmura." Sabay lingon kay Nate.
"Tom yum goong!" Sabay nilang bulalas kaya naman pareho silang bahagyang natawa.
"You're such a pain in my ass before kaya palagi tayong napaparusahan. Kaya palagi tayong hindi pinapakain ni Boss." Sabi ni Nate na napapailing pa. "That's why we were left with no choice but to find another way so we could eat."
"You were the one who taught me how to nick some people for money."
"We both need to survive and you were the reason why we got starved in the first place." Pang-aasar nito.
"Fine, fine, it was my fault." Pag-ako ni Lux. "I can't help it, I'm just a kid back then. I was.... weak."
"I know, that's why I've been so protective of you." At seryosong tumitig sa kanya. "And still am."
Si Sapphire na ang unang umiwas at ibinalik ang tingin sa paligid.
"So this is what you call a trip down memory lane, huh? Reminiscing our past adventures of being a small-time thief?" And walked along the road.
Sumunod naman sakanya ang binata at iniwan ang nirentahang sasakyan sa parking.
"Come on, follow me." Utos sakanya ng lalaki na nagpatiuna na sa paglalakad kaya naman sinundan na lamang niya.
Medyo natatandaan ni Saph ang daang tinatahak nila. Alam niya kung saan sila patungo at hindi niya alam kung ano ang magiging reaksyon niya sa makikita. Ngunit nanlaki ang mga mata niya nang makita ang lugar kung saan sila unang nagkakilala ni Nate.
The place looks as if it was abandoned a long time ago and it appeared as if it was burnt down by a huge fire. It was totally different from what she remembered.
"What happened in here?" Tanong niya habang pumapasok sa loob ng sirang gate.
"Fire broke out and everyone got arrested including Boss." Sagot ng lalaki kaya naman mabilis siyang napabaling rito.
"What? When was that? Was it when you were still part of the group? Were you arrested too? What happened? Paanong nangyari yun? Boss has a connection with the government, right? How did he end up getting caught? Who sold him to the police?" Sunod-sunod niyang tanong.
"I did." Seryosong sagot ni Juggernaut na nakatitig na sa sunog na gusali. "He needs to pay for his crimes and for what he has done to us, to you."
"Oh, Nate."
Hindi makapaniwala si Saph sa ginawa ng kaibigan. Ni wala siyang alam tungkol sa naging buhay nito pagkatapos siyang mabili ni Madame Pearl at dinala sa isla. Ni hindi niya naisip kung naging madali ba ang buhay nito noong nawala siya.
"What about the fire?" Sunod na tanong niya. "Were you also the one-"
"Yeah, I burned this place down." He answered intensely. "And it was a spectacular scene. The angry flames looked magnificent while devouring everything in here." He's describing it as if he's still currently watching that scene.
"And then what happened to you? Where did you go after that incident?"
"I finally got my freedom." Sabay lingon sa kanya na may kaunting ngiti na sa labi. "I got to be me."
"You've become Juggernaut?" Tanong niya na ipinagkibit-balikat lamang nito.
"I've become who I am supposed to be." At muling ibinalik ang tingin sa gusali. "Too bad, no one tried to buy and build this place."
"They don't want bad omens, I guess." Na naglakad pa upang libutin ang paligid. "The history of this place isn't nice and no one would want to keep any bad luck with them."
"Yeah, this place was horrendous but I wouldn't say it was all bad luck coz this is where I met you. My bratty little, Xury."
Hindi maiwasan ni Saph na mapangiti dahil roon. Yes, the place was a nightmare for a child like her but it was bearable because she has Nate beside her, keeping her safe and protected most of the time. And if it weren't for him, she would have not survived there. Either she was killed or she might have taken her own life so she could not be in pain anymore. She owe him big time.
"I remembered when I first came here, I keep on crying, wanting to go out. The boss wanted to punish me but you saved me. You were also a kid but you were mature for your age." Pagbabalik tanaw niya sa nakaraan nila.
"Iyakin ka kasi nun. Ayaw tumigil sa kakangawa kaya galit na galit si Boss. But I understand how sacred and how fragile you were. That's when I decided to be your protector. Kaya nga binansagan tayong 'the princess and her knight." Sabay tawa nang kaunti.
"Yeah, I remembered." At saka siya naglakad palabas muli at tinahak naman niya ang daan patungo doon sa dating abandonadong gusali kung saan sila ikinulong at tinangkang sunugin ng mga kasamahan nila. "Those other kids tried to trap and burn us here."
Halos wala nang natira sa lumang gusali dahil natupok ito noon ng apoy. Sadyang walang bumili ng lupa roon dahil hindi maganda amg reputasyon ng lugar nila. Kahit pa nasa Siam sila banda ay walang nagagawi roon dahil kasumpa-sumpa ang lugar.
"How can I forget that too, that's where I got this." And pointed at his burnt scar on his face. "Those scumbags don't deserve to live."
Saka lang naalala ni Saph na nawala nga pala ang tatlong lalaking iyon na nagtangka sa kanila. Ni hindi niya nalaman kung ano ang nangyari sa mga ito hanggang sa makuha siya ni Madame.
"Nasaan nga pala napunta ang mga iyon? Hindi ba't bigla na lang silang nawala? Pero bakit parang hindi na pinagkaabalahang hanapin sila noon ni Boss?" Tanong niya.
"Coz they were worthless pieces of shit!" Naroon pa din ang galit sa tono. "Hindi sila dapat pag-aksayahan ng panahon. They could've been killed for all I care."
Hindi naman na sumagot si Saph tungkol roon dahil alam niyang sensitibo pa din ito dahil sa nangyaring pagkakasunog nito.
"You were always there for me, you keep on saving me and until now, I still have your back just like you told me."
"I keep my word." Anito na itinaas pa ang damit sa likuran upang ipakita ang pangalan niyang naka-tattoo roon. "As long as your name is here, I will keep that promise."
Luxury smiled at him. She's grateful for having Nate in her life, for knowing him when she has no one. He's one of the most important people in her life.
"Now we're finished reminiscing where we started, where are we going next? Food tripping? Or don't tell me you want to act as a tourist and visit all the famous tourist spots here?" Pagbibiro niya na naglalakad na palabas roon.
"We're not yet done, Xury." Balik nito sa kanya kaya naman napalingon siya rito. "You're not yet done reminiscing the past."
"What do you mean? Wala na akong natatandaan pa na napupuntahan natin noon dahil hindi naman tayo maaring lumayo sa lugar na ito."
"Just follow me and you'll see." Na muling nagpatiuan kaya naman sumunod na lamang siya.
Muli nilang binalikan ang nakaparadang sasakyan at bumiyahe sila ng ilang minuto lamang. At kahit hindi sabihin sakanya ng binata ay alam na niya kung anong daan ang tinatahak nila. She vividly remembers the place.
Same as before, Klong Toey is a slum neighborhood in Bangkok and this is where she was born. She lived here before she got sold to a crime boss who runs underground fighting.
"Mukhang mas dumami ang mga tao rito, mas naging magulo at maingay. Ngunit kahit gaano kadamimg tao, mga wala pa ring pakialam sa paligid. They still don't give a shit whether a child needs help." Mapait niyang litanya habang binabagtas ang daan patungo sa eskinita ng bahay nila.
Naalala pa niya na madalas siyang ipasa-pasa ng kanyang ina kung kani-kaninong kapitbahay para iwan bago pumasok sa trabaho. Iba't ibang tao ang nagpalaki sa kanya, magmalasakit upang mapakain siya kahit papaano, kahit kakaunti dahil bata pa siya.
But during that fearful night, no one came to rescue her from the hands of her evil stepfather. No one even cared to call for help to save her. They left her to suffer.
"This was our house." Sabay turo niya sa bahay na nasa harapan niya.
Ganoon pa din ang itsura at laki. May iba nang nakatira at iba na din ang kulay ng pintura. Hindi na rin niya namumukhaan ang mga kapitbahay nila noon at di na siya nag-aksaya ng panahon para alalahanin pa dahil sapat na sakanya na tanda niyang iniwan siya ng lahat at walang tumulong ni-isa para sagipin siya nang gabing iyon. No cared.
"Let's get out of here." At nauna na siyang naglakad pabalik sa labasan.
"Wala pa limang minuto kang nakatayo roon ay lumabas ka na agad." Ani Nate sa kanya.
"It's because I can't stand that filthy place." Madiin niyang sabi. "Mas masahol pa yan kaysa sa kuta natin noon na pinuntahan kanina."
"This is where you were born, right? No happy memories?"
Saglit napatulala si Saph at pilit hinahanap sa isip ang tanong ng binata.
"There's none, not even one." Mapait niyang sagot.
Iyon naman kasi ang totoo. Wala siyang masayang alaala noong bata pa siya. Ni wala siyang matandaan na kahit ni katiting na minahal siya ng kanyang ina. She never celebrated her birthday because her mother wasn't always around. Baka nga sadyang hindi nito alam kung kailan siya ipinanganak. Nakita lang niya ang birth certificate niya noon kaya niya nalaman ang petsa ng kapanganakan niya.
Ang matandang kapitbahay lang nila noon ang nagturo sa kanyang magbasa at magsulat ng pangalan niya. Matalino daw siya dahil mabilis siyang matuto ngunit hindi rin nagtagal ang pag-aaral niya dahil lumipat ng tirahan ang matanda.
Hindi siya ipinasok ng ina sa paaralan dahil gastos lang daw iyon. Her mother told her that it isn't books and schools but the experience is the best teacher. And she was damn right because she did learn a lot.
Sa isla na niya natutuhan ang iba pang dapat matutunan. Marahil ay isa iyon sa naipagpasalamat niya dahil nakapag-aral siya at hindi lamang mga simple ang natutunan niya. They weren't only trained physically but also mentally which made them so dangerous.
"So I guess, bringing you here will help you refocus your head." Wika ni Nate na nagpahinto sa kanyang pag-iisip.
"What do you mean by that?"
"You always seemed distracted and you lost your touch. You're becoming.... soft." Pambibitin pa nito. "You're growing some conscience."
Hindi niya gaanong nagustuhan ang sinabi nito.
"Is that a bad thing?"
"It depends." Sabay kibit balikat. "It is when you're always putting yourself in danger. When you're giving your enemy an act of mercy when you shouldn't."
"I know I'm becoming inefficient lately and always causing troubles- making you guys worry but I can have my concentration back-"
"Can you?" Putol nito sakanya. "I don't think you can anymore." Sabay iling. "That's the reason why we're here in the first place. I need your focus for your upcoming battle. I want your old self back!"
"You mean the brutal Sapphire?"
"The fearless one."
She mockingly laughed at his remark.
"I am always fearless, Nate. I don't fear anyone and I have nothing to be afraid of." Seryoso niyang sabi.
"That's not what I meant." Seryoso na din ang mukha nito at hindi na nang-aasar. "I can see fear in your eyes but not for yourself." At namulsa habang pinagmamasdan siya. "Nakakaramdam ka ng takot para sa iba- para sa mga taong mahalaga sayo. And that would make you vulnerable. And in our world, vulnerable means predictable. And being predictable will make you lose everything."
Saph couldn't answer back because she knew he was just telling the truth. She's becoming soft or more likely she's becoming weak- the opposite of how she was raised by Madame. If she's back on the island, she would've been punished already or worse- been killed for being a weakling. There's no room for conscience in there because failure was never an option for the org.
"We have to do a restart on you." Ani Nate na binuksan ang passenger seat. "This is just a warm up." Sabay turo sa pinanggalingang lugar. "We'll go now so we could start."
"Where?"
"You'll see." At sumenyas sa kanya na sumakay na.
Hindi alam ni Saph kung saan sila patungo at tumataas lang ang antisipasyon niya sa kung anoman ang binabalak ng lalaki. Medyo malayo sa main city ang lugar na hinintuan nila. Takang-taka talaga siya kung ano ang ginagawa nila doon dahil hindi naman niya natatandaan na nakapunta na siya roon noong bata pa siya.
"What are we doing here? What kind of facility is this?" Tanong niya habang bumababa sa kotse. "What are we really doing here, Nate? Why are we here?"
"Impatient, huh?" Na binigyan pa siya ng nakakalokong ngiti. "Come on, let's get inside and you will find out why." At iginaya na siya papasok sa loob ng pasilidad.
Nililibot ni Saph ang paningin sa loob at napagtanto niyang isa iyong nursing care home para sa mga matatanda.
"What exactly are we doing here?!" She almost hissed at him.
"You're going to visit someone." Anito bago lumapit sa isang nurse para magtanong.
Nang ituro ng nurse ang daan palabas sa may likurang bahagi ng lugar ay tinahak nilang dalawa iyon. When they went out, it was a spacious garden backyard where the elders spend their time enjoying the beautiful view and fresh air.
May mga naglalakad nang dahan-dahan. May iba naman na nakaupo sa wheelchair habang tulak tulak ng nurse. May iba din nakaupo lang habang nakikipaglaro ng chess sa kapwa matanda. Iyon ang nadatnan nilang tagpo roon at wala talagang ideya si Lux sa kung sino ba ang dinadalaw nila.
"Sino ba ang pakay natin dito?" Bulong niya sa binata. "Why do we need to waste our time here?"
Tinitigan muna siya ni Nate bago sumagot.
"I told you, I need to pull your old self back. You said you're void of any emotions since you lived on the island but I need your rage, your hatred to come back."
"Stop fooling around, Nate." She said it because he doesn't make any sense to her.
"I'm not." Sabay baling sa di kalayuan. "Go on and approach that person." Turo nito sa isang matanda na nakawheelchair at mag-isang nagpapahangin.
Kunot noong binalingan niya muna si Nate na halatang seryoso sa ipinapagawa kaya naman sinunod na lamang niya. She walked towards that person who is isolated from the crowd. Obvious na lalaki kahit pa nakatalikod ito at nakatingin sa kawalan.
When Saph went in front of the old man, a shock of waves filled her. She couldn't believe that she would see him after two decades and she can still remember everything, every horror, every pain that he inflicted on her when she was just a fragile kid.
"You're still fucking alive!" Nalasahan niya ang galit sa tono niya.
Para namang walang narinig o nakikita ang matanda at tagos ang tingin nito. Nakatulala lang sa kawalan kaya mas lalong lumabas ang galit sa dibdib niya. She can never forget what he did to her that left her with a scar not just on her face but on her entire being.
"Do you still remember me you filthy pig!" She said, gritting her teeth with so much anger. "Do you remember what you did to me, huh?"
Nang ilapit niya ang mukha rito ay doon lamang unti-unting tumingin aa kanya ang matanda na para bang pilit siyang kinikilala.
"Look at me, look at my face you, bastard!" At mas inilapit pa ang mukha.
Bahagya naman itong nanginig sa takot habang iniiwas ang mukha sa kanya.
"Don't you dare move your face away, I want you to fucking look at me!" Mas malakas nang sabi niya ngunit hindi naman nakakaagaw pa ng atensyon sa ibang mga tao roon. "Look at what you did to me! Look at what you did to my face!"
Nang hawiin niya ang buhok na nakatabing sa mukha niya ay doon napabaling sa pilat niya ang mga mata ng matandang lalaki. Her so-called stepfather grew his eyes wide upon staring at her scar and she knew that finally, he recalls what he did to her.
"See this scar, huh? Do you remember now how you gave this to me?" And she angled her face so she can show it to him up close. "Do you remember how you carved my face with a fucking knife?!"
And as Saph questioned him, she also recalls what happened that night. She said that she was void of any emotions but how come she can feel what she exactly felt that night? The cold tip of the blade pierced her skin as it gets deeper. And he kept on cutting her longer than she tasted her blood coz she kept crying- begging him to stop. That was the very first unbearable pain she endured and it traumatized her- scarred her for life.
"L-Lux... L-L-Luxu... L-Lux-xury." Utal-utal nitong wika.
"You still fucking remember my name." May pait at galit niyang sabi.
Hindi niya namalayan na nakalapit na din sa tabi niya si Nate at saka may inilahad sa kanya. Napatingin siya sa balisong sa palad nito.
"You know what to do." Anito at iniabot na sa kamay niya na kanya namang tinaggap.
Nang lumakad ito palayo at saka luminga sa paligid na animo'y nagbabantay ay naintindihan na niya ang nais nitong ipagawa. He said he needed her rage to come back and now it is crawling back at her- building inside her.
"P-Please." Hirap na sabi ng matanda sa harap niya. "P-Please, h-have m-m-mer-cy on m-me."
She raised her head and gave him a wry smile.
"Mercy?" Pag-ulit niya. "I also asked for that, remember? I begged for you to stop but you just kept on going. You cut my face to make me pretty." Kumuyom na ang kamao niya kaya't humigpit na ang hawak niya sa balisong. "But I also made some damage to you have I?"
Inangat niya ang baba nito upang makita niya nang maayos ang pagmumukha nito. She caressed his left eye which she stabbed that night too, leaving him one-eye blinded.
"But it's still not enough." She said as she opened the knife, freeing the sharp blade from its cover. "You deserved more than that!" And without hesitance, she slashes the knife on his cheeks- twice. Left and right.
He screamed in pain and that caught everyone's attention in there. Saph stepped back as she saw him holding his both cheeks that are bleeding heavily. And she didn't even feel any remorse or pity, instead, she felt joyous- a sense of satisfaction enveloped her. And so she smiled wickedly at the man before running away with Nate.
Mabilis na silang umalis doon bago pa man sila mahuli ng mga rerespondeng pulis kung sakali mang tumawag ang mga naroon ng tulong.
Saph didn't know that she has still this rebellious act in her. She thought she has lost it on the island. That trip was really making her feel angrier but alive and it made her want to pour that anger out on someone if only she was in the middle of a fight.
Hawak-hawak pa rin niya ang balisong na may bahid ng dugo habang nasa loob sila ng sasakyan. Matulin ang pagpapatakbo ni Nate upang makalayo sila sa crime scene. They could end up in jail if they get caught.
"Here, wipe it." Abot sa kanya ng pamunas.
Kinuha naman iyon ni Lux at saka ipinunas upang matanggal ang dugo sa kutsilyo.
"How did you know he was there?" Tanong niya nang di lumilingon sa binata.
"I have my resources. I knew some people here who can help me with whatever I want." Na lumingon pa sa kanya saglit bago ibinalik ang mga mata sa daan. "He was there for almost two years after he was diagnosed with Alzheimer's."
"What a lucky bastard!" Galit niyang anas. "He gets to forget everything while I still suffer. How cruel and unfair the world is!" Gusto niyang manuntok o manakit sa galit.
"Kaya nga kita dinala dito para kahit papaano makaganti ka at maibalik mo yang galit mo sa mga taong naging dahilan ng pagdurusa mo."
"You should've seen the look on his face as I slashed this knife at him." And she smiled at the satisfaction she was feeling right now. "The feeling of inflicting pain on him- it felt highly satisfying."
"But still not enough, right?"
"I don't know." Aniya na kinapa pa sa dibdib kung ano ang nararamdaman.
"You're still craving for that revenge, right? You still want to inflict pain on those people who abused you and made you suffer?"
Yes, I totally do!
Aniya sa isip na hindi na naisatinig pa kaya tumingin na lang siya sa labas ng bintana.
"Weber died before I can inflict pain on him." Sabi niya habang nakatitig na lamang sa tanawin sa labas ng bintana. "He and his sister, both ended their lives before I can exact my revenge on them."
She didn't have the chance for the retribution she wanted for the siblings. It would've been better, she would've felt better if they had received the punishment they deserved. But they took the easy way out- an easy death for them to escape this world's verdict on them.
"But you said you betrayed your org, right? Then you just gave them your punishment." Anito na ikinailing niya.
"It's not what they deserved. They deserved harsher punishment from the law." Saka ito nilingon kaya naman nilingon din siya pabalik at nagtama ang kanilang paningin. "Their deaths are not enough. It's not enough for me."
He reached for her and patted her head.
"Don't worry, there is still someone left whom you can punish for your sufferings." Anito na ipinagkunot ng noo niya.
She just let Nate take the lead coz her anger is still rocket high. Bahala na ito kung saan man siya balak dalhin o kung sino ang isusunod na ihaharap nito sakanya. Ang gusto lang niya sa ngayon ay ang makapanakit ng mga taong ginawan siya ng masama. Everyone who owes her will pay dearly. They must suffer her punishment.
She remained silent the entire travel. They aren't in the city anymore and the view of the mountains is breathtaking. When he parked the car meters away from a huge house, that's when the time she asked him a question.
"Sino naman ngayon ang dadalawin natin? Does this person owe me too?"
He looked at her and gave her a sly smile.
"Yeah, big time."
Sabay na silang naglakad at tumayo sa harapan ng gate. Lux surveyed the house and the intricate design was very modern yet homey. Obviously na may kaya ang nakatira roon at talaga namang kuryoso na siya sa kung sino ang taong iyon na dapat niyang singilin.
She was about to ring the doorbell when Nate stopped her.
"Where's the fun if there's no surprise element, right?" Anito bago tumawid sa may bakod para makapasok sa loob.
Lux followed and jumped over the fence too like a thief. They both went inside the house quietly. Still, she doesn't have any clue about whom she's going to meet. She kept on looking around but there's no one in there. And then, on one of the side tables, she saw a picture frame and when she took a closer look, mixed emotions poured inside her.
Sakto naman na bigla silang nakarinig ng kaunting ingay mula sa may pool area sa likod. She heard a child's giggle and a sudden curiosity filled her so she went to look.
Kita niya na masayang tumatakbo-takbo ang isang batang babae bago tumalon sa pool. Sa tantiya niya ay wala pa sampung taon ang edad nito. At isa ang batang iyon sa litratong nakita niya kasama ang pamilya nito.
She can see the joy in the child's eyes while playing in the pool. Her smile resembles pure innocence and it can melt anyone's heart for sure. But not hers. Because how can she feel something when her heart is broken? And the one who broke it was the very same person who was with the child in the pool.
Hindi niya mailarawan ang nararamdaman sa oras na iyon kaya naman napatitig lang siya at hindi na nakakilos pa sa kinatatayuan.
"It wasn't even her real daughter." Ani Nate sa tabi niya.
Hindi naman sila rinig dahil nakasarado ang sliding door palabas sa pool.
"She has her own family now?" May pait sa tanong niya.
"Well, she got married nine years ago. And her husband has two kids of his own. A fifteen-year-old son and a daughter who is turning ten in two months." Anito na ang tinutukoy ay ang batang babaeng naglalaro sa may pool. "The husband's first wife died while giving birth and that paved a way for that woman to enter their lives."
Saph stared at the woman who looks at the little girl with so much affection and love. At iyon ang mga bagay na hindi niya naranasan mula rito.
"How can she love someone else's child when she couldn't love her own kid back then?" Tanong niya habang tila ba may bikig na nakaharang sa kanyang lalamunan.
When her mother kissed the little girl on the head while embracing her tightly, tears suddenly fell from Luxury's eyes and stained her cheek- even the scar on it. She envies the child because she was never been hugged by the woman who has brought her out into this world.
She wanted to feel that warm embrace. She wanted to feel how it feels to be taken care of, to be loved by her own mother. And now seeing her old woman in there, she felt a tiny hope that things will be different now. That her mother will be happy to know that she is still alive.
"What are you going to do now?" Nate asked. "Are you ready to draw your sword and make her pay? Or are you gonna beg for her love and affection just like how you did when she sold and left you behind before?"
Lux couldn't answer him because her mind is too preoccupied. She has mixed emotions now that she found her mother. She's hoping that she would accept her now and if she did, she's willing to forgive her and forget everything in the past.
After mustering the courage, she stepped out of the glass door and made herself visible to them. The two got startled at her sudden appearance but her mother recognized her instantly and went out of the pool to face her.
"Luxury?"
Saph thought she would hug her, so she stepped closer to meet her halfway but the tiny hope that she has for herself was crushed down when her same old mother with a heart as cold as ice stopped her from getting closer.
"You should have not come here! You should stay away from me and my family."