(Isabella pov)
i'm so pretty it's honestly a crime. i'm sitting here and looking at myself in my vanity. but my vanity lights aren't on cause i hate those lights it's only good for when ima doing my makeup or when i need light in my room but don't wanna turn on my big light.
so i'm sitting and admiring my beauty that god took his time on before my phone starts ringing.
i've been hanging out with my mom today cause we don't hang out often and i miss her so i just relaxed with her today. now she's sleeping cause she barley got any sleep last week or this week cause she's been overworking herself.
i honestly want to make it a goal in my life to work a good job for her to be able not to work anymore and still live comfortably. my mom doesn't have very expensive taste so she mostly saves up most the money she has for if anything happens to her i'm set for life. but i really don't wanna think like that.
i couldn't imagine living without both my parents, but i really can't live without at least one of them.
i pick up my phone, answer the facetime, and set my phone up against my vanity mirror.
"what's up." i asked after answering javons facetime call.
"hey i'm just gonna be honest i haven't even started the paper, and i'm not sure if you have but i called to see if you want to do it together." he asked setting his phone up on his gaming desk.
"oh shit i forgot about that paper. yeah let's do it together." i agreed
"wait ima call you back on my laptop." i told him cause i didn't wanna set up my phone and everything. i want to lay in my bed and do it. but i feel like if i set my phone up on my bed. the fabric would make it hard for me to hear him or him to hear me.
so i rather just put my MacBook to use and call him off there.
"alright." he said.
i said bye before i grabbed my laptop from ontop my dresser. i also grabbed my backpack from my floor. i put my laptop onto my bed and put my backpack right next to my bed on the floor.
honestly can't imagine putting my backpack, the one i take to school on my bed. it would just make me feel like my whole beds dirty.
i open my laptop sit down and get situated before calling javon back.
"you know i though you were gonna be quicker then that." he said answering his phone and setting it back up onto his desk
"i'm sorry do i hear complaints from a guy who asked me for my help?" i asked stopping what i was doing just to look at my laptop.
"no no i'm sorry." he apologized.
"thank you." i responded before bringing out my heavy ass geometry book to write on.
"okay this paper has to be good soo, what have you wrote so far." i asked him.
"um my title and my name, oh and don't forget the date." he said turning to his paper then turning back to me.
"i'm not even gonna hate cause i only have that too."
"let's start then." he said
*****
after two and a half hours and one of my mental breakdowns we finally finished the paper.
"okay read yours." javon said pausing his music from the playlist we created, he had playing in his background so we can both listen to it.
"okayyy kinda nervous." i said and laughed before i started to read my paper.
"why are women treated the way they are, women create life, a homey feeling, and go through so much, yet still get treated like trash. why are women expected to have kids? some women can't, emotionally or physically. some women can't even take care of themselves, or aren't stable enough mentally or financially to have children. other women aren't able to have kids, no matter how much they want to they just aren't able to. why should they feel ashamed cause they aren't able to do what other women can. why are women being put down by men and even other women for not being able to have kids? also some women don't want the responsibility or to be tied down to have kids. they want to travel and live there best life without having to worry about kids to feed or to take care of. there's not a problem with women not wanting to have kids it's normal but why are women all viewed to have kids and settle down, just stay at home and be with your kids all day. having a child is a huge responsibility women have to be strong enough to handle it. pregnancy is just the beginning throwing up all day and night, not being able to do things you did before, not being able to eat and drink things like before, and being responsible for what happens to your baby inside your stomach. childbirth is one of the most painful things a women can go through, for some childbirth is less painful then others, but it's still hard. 66 deaths out of 100,000 takes place during childbirth, only in Atlanta. Men often like to compare childbirth to getting hit in the genitals or even go as far to say getting kick in the genitals hurts more then going into labor which is just not true. getting kicked in the genitals last for only a couple minutes child birth can last up to hours or even days. women often give off a homey environment or even a homey mentality. being nurtured by a women is such a good feeling knowing there going to take care of you emotionally. if a women is really in love they will go to there limits for you, and make sure you get taken care of. weather it's making sure your fed, your comfortable, or making sure your taking care of your self, hygiene or physically heath wise. once a month a majority of women go through what we call a period, which some people find nasty. why? women bleed out of there private area once a month for 7 days and get called disgusting. we didn't ask for it, it's natural for us. going through cramps twenty-four seven, but getting told it's not that serious to stop complaining about how much it hurts. men like to compare themselves to women oftenly they like to say it's harder being a man, i won't disagree cause i don't know the struggles of being a man, but it's mostly the audacity to say men work jobs, men provide, men do harder activities. so us women are getting compared to men cause they work jobs, so do women. they have kids and need to provide for them, they can't be sad and be lazy. they suck it up and give there kids a better chance to have a childhood. not always there kids but also there siblings, maybe there parents where not very good and they had to step up and be a parent to there younger sibling. us women are not allowed to sit around and do nothing cause then we aren't very lady like, we are lazy, nobody is gonna wanna marry us, we aren't going to be able to be a good house wife or stay at home mom. being a women or even girl in this generation anything you do is gonna be judged because we can never just get a break. if you wear makeup you automatically wear way to much, but if you don't wear any makeup you aren't mature and nobody is gonna find interest in you. being a women today you will never catch a break.
written by: Isabella Romano"
i finished reading my paper before looking up at wanna.
"soo whatcha think, i feel like it could have been better." i nervously laughed cause he hasn't said anything.
"i love women." he said after sometime of just looking at me.
"you like it." i smile.
"yeah it's so good your for sure getting an A." he said
"okay thank you but read yours i wanna hear it." i told him insisting we don't waste any more time cause i still have to clean my room and do my skin care.
"okay mine isn't as good as yours buttt, i'm kinda proud of it." he said before taking a deep breath and starting to read it.
i would tell you guys but he was kinda shy and didn't want me to share it with all you.
"i feel like it's not good enough, or long enough." he said putting his paper down.
"i really liked it though i'm proud of you." i smiled at him.
"thank you." he smiled and took his head out of the frame.
"can you help me add to it?" he asked me.
"sure." i told him.
"you should grab a new piece of paper so we can write it down again as it being like 'finalized' and we can add to it." i said putting air quotation marks when i said finalized.
"okay." he did as i told him to and grabbed out a paper with a new pencil cause he said his ran out of eraser. i swear when i first saw it like 3 hours ago it was brand new.
but, who am i to judge i made mistakes and erased my paper multiple times.
"okay i'm thinking to add something onto this part about men having feelings too."
"okay maybe put; just because men cry there considered weak? their humans with feeling just like everyone else. men are allowed to cry yet they would never in front of anyone just because of the overwhelming though of being seen as not taking seriously or just weak in general." i gave him an idea.
"that's good sweetheart now repeat that nice and slow for me, yeah?" he said making me internally fold.
"okay." i responded before repeating it to him a little slower so he could write it down.
*****
"are we done." i yawned as javon wrote his name at the bottom of his paper.
"yeah you should get some sleep, you look tired." he said.
"i know i am but i have to clean my room and do my skincare." i groaned and leaned my head onto my arms that's resting on my soft fluffy circle pillow.
"stay on the phone with me." he insisted.
"it's gonna be boring but if you insist." i snickered.
***
"okay so first i wash my face with this cerave cleaner, look it's for sensitive skin." i show him the bottle, not me pretending this is a whole youtube challenge.
"my sister has that in her bathroom." he let me know.
"your sister is my soulmate." i sighed
"no she isn't." he mumbled under his breath.
i was going to make a remark to it but decided against it.
i already finished cleaning my room, noodles was not very happy when i vacuumed my floor, i honestly think i hella scarred him.
but i finished and i cleaned my vanity while javon was talking to me and telling me about his day.
i also did some laundry, i have clothes that are javons here so i washed them cause my dresser has one empty section in the left bottom so ima just put his clothes in there, he even has boxers here how? i don't know i'm not even sure he showered here before.
my bed is made and looks so comfortable i have 4 regular pillows on it then 4 circle flurry pillows on it, all my stuffed animals which is 6 of them and about 4 blankets throw onto my bed neatly so i can sleep with them tonight.
my rooms usually cold cause it's on the third level of the house so yeah it gets pretty cold down he and i don't like turning on the heater cause i feel like i get hot fast from it so i snuggle with a lot of blankets.
"can i see you tomorrow." javon broke me out of my thoughts.
"i don't know depends are you gonna bring me my clothes from your house?" i asked him.
i really want my underwear and clothes i got, some of the clothes i got will make really cute outfits.
"i mean i guess yeah i can." he looked a little put down.
"then yeah you could see me." i told him before i put him on mute and set my phone on the counter facing the ceiling so i could go pee.
when i finish i wipe,flush, and wash my hands before grabbing my phone and turning off the light. i made my way to my bed and laid there
of course before i laid down to turned off my lights and unplugged what doesn't need to be plugged in.
"i'm tired" i yawn.
"me too." javon agreed before he yawned to.
"i'll see you tomorrow, when are you coming?" i asked him before i laid on my stomach and put my phone laying flat on the bed.
" in the morning i'll take you breakfast." he said.
"okay, i'll talk to you later i'm so tired." i said and i started closing my eyes.
"okay bye."
"bye"
after i hung up the phone i laid back down so i can fall asleep, but i never did.
"fuck." i mumbled and i flipped over and laid on my back.
i don't wanna be like this again.
i'm tired but i can't sleep, no matter how much my minds telling me to sleep my body isn't ready to go to sleep.
after having a mental battle with myself i decide to say fuck it and take one.
i get out of bed and walk to my dresser.
i open my underwear drawer and feel around until i reach the back of it and feel a bottle.
i pull the bottle out and open it.
i tilt the bottle and it drops a pill into my hand.
i walk back to my bed and grab the water on my nightstand.
opening the water bottle i tilt my head back and place the pill on my tongue, i drink the water to my mouth and drink some swallowing the pill as the water does down my throat.
this can't happen again, he isn't here to help anymore.
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Authors note: there no excuse, i'm done trying to make an excuse for myself i'm just so unmotivated and my mental health isn't all the way there but i'm still doing to post chapters cause i know you guys love them.posting twice a week now!!! i love you guyss my smutty thots.
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