My nerves, they give me a sign
Tell me I'm not fine
mhm
You've got be nervous to speak
So I just won't say anything at all
I've got an urge to release
And you keep telling me to hold on
Nervous~ The Neighborhood
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next day is a mess.
Felix is utterly exhausted because he once again had gone to bed too late, a decision that he knows he will regret but is still too stubborn to change.
But time's a bitch.
So, he finds himself seated at some random greasy fast-food restaurant, Seungmin gouging himself in onion rings across from him, trying to ignore the fatigue that mercilessly tugs at his eyelids and sinks his limbs to the floor.
He looks around, desperate to distract himself and stay awake, when he sees a boy in a uniform approaching their table. He has styled light brown hair, and fucking violet contacts in.
Felix prepares to order himself some chicken, but is startled by a buzz from his phone. He picks up the screen and looks at it, not thinking much of the notification, until he sees who it's from.
Meet me for lunch.
~ Hwang Hyunjin
And he nearly spits out his room-temperature water that was probably supposed to naturally come with ice, before he feels his phone ding again.
Right now.
~ Hwang Hyunjin
Felix quickly fiddles with his phone, now too busy to pay mind to the boy who was currently trying to take his order.
Sorry, but I have to decline your offer. I can't make it. Ask someone else.
He writes back, and finally acknowledges the boy now standing at the end of the scratchy wooden table.
Who he now notices is very attractive.
Yes, he has overly noticeable purple contact in, but he is covered head to toe in thick silver clothing. He has sharp eyes, with prominent cheekbones, and Felix wonders why a guy who looks like a prince is working in a fast food joint.
He clearly has money too, with his ray bans resting atop his flawless nest of golden hair, and his designer shoes that are polished a pearly white.
"I see one of you has already gotten some food, but what would you like, cutie?" And the boy fucking winks after asking his question, striking Felix in the heart with cupid's arrow.
"Nothing! I'm still looking at the menu!" He blurts out, overwhelming pressure crushing him.
"Oh, okay! Just call for me whenever you need." He slides the pad that he was going to use to jot down the orders into his back pocket, sticking his tongue in his cheek. He (weirdly seductively, might Felix add), looks Felix from head to toe before introducing himself.
"Yang Jeongin."
Felix just bows his head in response, watching the boy walk away and wondering why he was so flustered.
"Damn, smooth Lix. Smooth." Seungmin nods his head as if he was agreeing with himself.
And Felix is about to proudly and vehemently defend his (non-existent) honor, when he feels yet another vibration in his left pocket.
I will pay generously.
~ Hwang Hyunjin
And Felix really wants to type out a quick "Sorry, I already declined," and be done with the matter in a few quick seconds, but then he thinks.
Generously?
It wasn't as if he wanted to accept the offer, but clearly, Hyunjin had money, and lots of it at that.
"Hey Kardashian-"
"Don't call me that."
Felix is a tiny bit annoyed, because kardashian was just the perfect name for Seungmin. He still was never going to stop calling him that.
"As I was saying, Kardashian, do you think I could run away right now?"
"Wait wha-"
And Felix has bolted out of the restaurant.
He quickly responds to Hyunjin, slightly disappointed that he couldn't have just eaten some chicken in peace.
Okay. Send the Address.
Felix doesn't enjoy being able to be bought, but that was how it is. He receives the address and hurriedly calls an uber, texting Seungmin a quick apology that he truly did mean.
~~~~
This is a restaurant?!
Felix is currently looking up wide-eyed at the 'restaurant' Hyunjin told him to go to, which looked the part of a luxury hotel.
He was especially staring at the name
It was called Hwang Gourmet.
There isn't a way that Hyunjin owns this place... right?
Yeah.
That isn't possible.
Okay Felix isn't stupid. Hyunjin definitely owns this place. His suspicions aren't confirmed though, so he shall pretend he doesn't suspect anything of the sort.
He is so underdressed. Like so underdressed. If he walks into this building wearing his pink hoodie and overalls with his cliche dirty converse... all would be lost.
Fuck it.
Felix is strutting towards the building. More like charging, actually, trying to enter it without anybody noticing his strange attire.
He bursts through the glass doors.
The floor is quite slippery.
He falls.
Very (un)gracefully.
Flat on his face.
That's one way to make an entrance. It's just another story to tell (is what Felix tells himself for comfort even though in reality he is currently having the most embarrassing moment of his eventful life.)
He hurriedly stands up and brushes off his denomed legs, looking around and making sure nobody saw.
Everyone did.
Everyone didn't include Hwang Hyunjin though, so he still exhaled in relief.
"Are you Lee Felix?"
His head shot up and to the woman behind the front desk counter, who had her own gold-lined label titling her the 'Restaurant Receptionist,' which Felix didn't even know existed.
"You are! Please follow me."
If he was meeting anyone else, he would be seriously concerned and creeped out. But it was Hyunjin, so it felt quite normal.
He quietly walked after her, trying to ignore all the judgemental gazes he felt boring through his overalls and light pink jumper. He cursed under his breath, wondering what Hyunjin would think of him once he saw his outfit.
Although he obviously doesn't care about Hyunjin's opinion.
He wanted to get paid.
The girl is leading him to an elevator, and Felix notices she had a very nice suit on as a uniform. Just what kind of restaurant was this?
The elevator doors open to a long hallway, and the female starts hurriedly walking down the hallway all the way to the end, muttering a "we must not be late" lowly under her breath.
They finally arrive, and the woman opens the doors to reveal Hyunjin. He is sitting alone at a table, his black hair down and lucious, looking down at an empty plate. He is dressed in a solid ebony suit, which only seems fitting. Felix looks at his face, lips obscenely pink and skin velvety smooth, with his eyes shadowy and desolate, and his eyebrows somehow trimmed to perfection, and Felix really needs to stop.
Hyunjin looks up slowly, looking at Felix's outfit from head to toe and his eyes not faltering.
"RR, take him to change clothes. Immediately. Discard the old ones."
What?
Bang boom pow, a couple seconds later, he finds himself being dragged by the arms forcefully out of the room, the doors to the room shutting once again.
Okay this has to somehow be illegal.
It is, but it seemed Hyunjin didn't care.
"Sorry Felix, I must do this. Boss's orders, you know?" The girl let go of his arms, which he could have sworn she wasn't the one dragging him, since they were so effortlessly strong. Maybe the suit just disguised her muscles well.
"Follow me, all you have to do is put on a different outfit. Don't worry, I won't actually get rid of your clothes, that's just what the boss'll think."
He's starting to like this girl.
He follows her into another room, and the restaurant he's in is still adorned head to toe in pure white furniture with enchanting golden accents.
There are clothes everywhere in the place he is led to, and the 'RR' as Hyunjin called her earlier is running around the room looking at the different options. She eventually pulls out a fucking ivory colored buttoned jacket with the same pants matching, and a simple white shirt for under. She practically throws them in Felix's face, which he takes as a cue to get changed.
The entire time he is just thinking:
What the actual fuck?
The entire day from when he accepted this offer to now has just felt like a fever dream, and he really wants to wake up from it.
Hyunjin sure is a peculiar sugar daddy.
~~~~
Awkward.
He is staring at Hyunjin, unsure of what to say or do, dressed head to toe in he doesn't know what material, but it feels expensive. Hyunjin keeps sipping on his wine and stealing looks at him, and he isn't sure how to respond, so instead he just keeps eating his costly steak by taking small bites and nibbling on them, and he wonders once again what the point of Hyunjin having him here even is.
They are sitting across from each other, and they themselves are complete opposites.
Moon and sun.
Dark and light.
Even their suits, for gods sake, are ebony and ivory.
There are red candles surrounding the entire room, and it gives the place a romantic vibe, which in turn just makes Felix even more uncomfortable.
"I'm very sorry for the short notice. Due to some circumstances, I have to eat here, and that chair felt too empty for me to enjoy my food."
Felix immediately thinks who the hell needs all chairs to be filled to find food tasty?
Cause he could have just gotten rid of the chair.
But no, instead he called the random guy he painted who crosses his left leg over his right and made him rush over, ordered him to change into an uncomfortably formal outfit, and proceeded to not really talk and make it awkward for the both of them.
No wonder he's a snake.
"I see. The food is great." He paused, reaching for any topic to try and make conversation. "I noticed that this place has Hwang in the name, do you have anything to do with that, or is that just a coincidence?" He asked the male, already knowing the answer in the back of his mind.
"Yeah, I own it." Hyunjin said it as if it was the most obvious fact to ever exist.
Felix still didn't like him.
"Whoa, you own this?" He used every ounce of surprise he had left in him to try and flatter Hyunjin.
"Yeah."
The flattery didn't work, and now Felix is just trying to occupy the awkwardness by fogging up his wine glass with his breath and drawing a face. He even resorted to tracing the design on the tablecloth with his forefinger for a while.
"How are you?"
Felix freezes, bite only half chewed, eyes sliding from the food before him and up to Hyunjin.
He swallows and clears his throat before saying the only response that came to his mind.
"I'm fine, thank you, and you?" And then Felix is flabbergasted by his own stupidity, and so very pissed off at himself for saying something like that in such childish spite.
Hyujins reaction is unexpected.
He recoils as if he's been whipped, flinching at Felix's response as if it burned him. He soon regains his confidence slowly and sits back up straight, taking another drink of swirled wine, pinky extended as the glass makes contact with his pink lips.
Felix himself takes a drink of the expensive burgundy liquid, eyes patient and hiding all shock.
"Same here." That's what Hyunjin says. Just 'same here.'
What the fuck?
Felix sees that his eyes are still distant, pristine hair gliding over his alarmingly gone look, and perhaps Hyunjin senses Felix's smokey endless eyes cause his head whips around to face him, stares reconnecting.
And there's silence between them for the nth time.
Felix is just purely rubbed the wrong way when it comes to all things involving Hyunjin.
His overly perfect face and faux innocence and seemingly sweet and effortless charm.
Something is wrong with this boy. Very, very wrong. And Felix wants to escape.
He wants to rise up, dust off his clothes (That he didn't even ask for.) and walk out, amused and excited to escape the frigid and empty being.
But bills need to be paid.
So instead he will take another effortless bite of his steak and just try to disengage with all interaction with Hyunjin, and pretend that he's not desperately unsettled by the darkened wall blocking all emotion and intimacy behind Hyunjin's eyes.
~~~~
The rest of the dinner didn't go any better.
It was full of discomfort and tension, tension that Felix didn't know how to deal with. The only way he knew how to deal with conditions like that was talking and laughing, and with Hyunjin things like that seemed to only increase the gaucheness in the room.
He had departed with Hyunjin fairly quick, trying to leave as soon as possible. It was even more awkward, because for some reason Felix decided to spread his arms wide for a hug, as if they were old friends, to which Hyunjin gave the most judgemental look Felix has ever seen.
The first time Hyunjin wore an emotional countenance was a face of pure disgust, and it was simply directed at a gesture of a hug.
More of a reason to escape Hyunjin as soon as possible is what Felix thinks.
But there was one more thing.
Hyunjin had offered to fucking take Felix home.
So- through streams of doubt and self-depreciation- he miserably declined, the words basically flowing out of his mouth as he goes on and on about how he could never burden Hyunjin like that when he himself wasn't deserving. (He was honestly just creeped out, and letting Hyunjin walk him home would've been the last drop in the ocean, and it would've flooded a city.)
He was taking an uber to the hospital currently, and had successfully fled from the fancy palace he was once in.
He exited the uber, traveling towards the front doors of the hospital, and attempting to intelligently pull a push door as his bewildered brain struggles to comprehend basically anything that is happening.
He walks in and the front desk clerk gives him a nod after recognizing him. (Her name is Marie, Felix knows that because she has a normal name tag and not one that says some shitty code like 'HC' for hospital clerk.)
His head is addled with sour-tinged curses to society as he marches his way to the left and walks through a door that is all-too-familiar for him.
"Felix!! It's so great to see you!"
"Grams!" He runs up to the side of her bed, pressing the button to pull down the railing, and takes her in a warm embrace, careful not to mess with the tubes that are all around her.
"How are you doing boy?" She croaks, her gray hair peeking out from atop her head, and her eyes crinkling to the point where Felix can't see them, and he himself wonders if she even could see through the sliver of space left.
"I'm doing great!" Felix lies. "Are you doing any better?"
"Why yes, they tell me I'm getting stronger all the time." His grandma laid back down onto the springy polkadot mattress. "They're lyin though. I know they're just doin it for my sake." She sighs, along with Felix.
He knew that the answer wasn't going to be good. He doesn't know why he asked, when he knew that the answer was going to be bad enough for him to get tipped off at the doctors.
They don't care about her, and it was all because Felix couldn't pay for treatment. All they did was act like they cared enough for them to try. It was all a facade.
It's his fault that he can't pay for proper treatment.
It's his fault that all they are doing for her is feeding her countless and countless pills that have no affect. Some of them even make it worse.
Felix reached out a hand and placed it on her pale cheek, hoping that somehow everything would be alright.
Her skin was cold.
He smiled at her, because if she doesn't make it through this, then he at least wanted her last few memories to be filled with cheer and smiles, not guilt and sadness.
She relaxed into his touch, enjoying her only familie's company.
It was mutual, the fact that they were each other's only family. The rest were gone.
He saw how his grandma looked him up and down in wonder and curiosity.
"Why are you wearing such nice clothes? You don't have to get all glammed out just to visit me. I feel underdressed." She chuckled, her eyes once again disappearing and her chest thrown back.
Felix wished she could get all 'glammed out.'
He just pressed his lips to her forehead. "Why? Are you saying I look bad?"
She just lightheartedly chuckled in response, her head thrown back once again and her breath shaky. "Maybe I am." She challenged, teasingly grabbing his ear and dragging him down closer to her.
"I want you to know that I will get better. This sickness won't last forever, I'm gonna keep on a'kickin until the afterlife has to drag me there."
She laughed after. She fucking laughed, as if her being in a hospital bed was the funniest thing she has ever seen.
He moved so his head was behind her, so she couldn't see his face of sadness.
"I know, Grams, I know."
He couldn't let her see him like this. He couldn't be so vulnerable in front of her, not when she only deserved to be happy.
"Sorry, but I have to go now. All me mates are waiting for me."
"Oh, I see. Well don't leave me waiting for ya for too long, yer my only company." She said with a grin wide spread across her face.
If you die of old age, there are two possibilities.
Number one; you die as an elderly person who is ready to die.
Number two; you die as an elderly person who isn't.
Both are sad.
Grams always pretends to be ready to go. She pretends to be strong, pretends that nothing can faze her. (Maybe that's where Felix gets his acting skills from.) But she isn't good at it, not good enough to prevent him from seeing through her.
In reality, his grandma is scared.
Who wouldn't be?
Felix can feel his only family's eyes on him as he retreats and walks away, giving a wave behind him but not turning back, because he refuses to reveal his tearful demeanor and has absolutely no idea how to deal with the circumstances.
He nearly falls over and collapses onto the ground after exiting the room.
Cause it's hard to see your only family dying in front of you, knowing that you have no way to stop it, because you don't have any money.
Whoever said money doesn't buy happiness was wrong.
And he is just about to go onto his disgusting day when an even more disgusting face shows in front of him, intercepting him.
"You know her fees are due." The doctor spoke, clipboard in hand, pencil in shirt pocket.
And Felix has the sudden urge to take a brick that is laying by the wall- which he doesn't know why it's there- and bang it on the doctor's head. At least that would give the brick a purpose.
But he obviously can't do that, so he chooses to simply glare at the doctor with a fury that only the devil himself could match. (Also known as Hwang Hyunjin, but Felix totally isn't thinking of him right now because there is no reason to be.)
"I know, I can pay right now." He mumbles, feet stuck to the floor.
Because the only reason he can pay is because he went out to lunch today.
With Hwang Hyunjin.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
AN:
Do you like the nickname Kardashian for Seungmin? I was just thinking of "Kim" and I came up with it on the spot. I personally love it. (And I will take offense if you don't)
I'm hoping this makes up for the lack of hyunlix in the previous chapter, cause this one was SO MUCH more fun to write.
I'm just writing the chapters as I go and posting them, no prewrites simply because I'm not that patient- even though I know most authors do that.
I AM SO EXCITED TO WRITE THE NEXT CHAPTER, and you should be excited to read it ;)
<(•-•<)
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