third person pov
the aftermath of rachel catching a pigeon in a pan was the escalade into a group discussion surrounding phoebe's 'husband'.
"this is unbelievable pheebs, how can you be married?" joey chokes, leaning back against the counter. the group gathered in the girls kitchen, gianna with her head in the fridge.
"well, i mean, i'm not married married, ya know, he's just a friend and he's gay and he's just from canada and he needed a green card." phoebe tries to explain, standing from the table to lean into the fridge behind gianna.
"i can't believe you married duncan. i mean how could you not tell me? we lived together, we told each other everything." monica coughs in disbelief, gesturing with her arms.
"i'm sorry monica but i knew if i told you, you'd get really, like, judgemental and you would not approve."
"of course i wouldn't approve." monica replies quickly, prompting gianna to send a glance to chandler. they both furrow their brows at each other, soft smiles tugging at their lips as they do. "i mean, you were totally in love with this guy who, hello, was gay. i mean, what the hell were you thinking?"
"you see, and you thought she'd be judgemental." ross offers, holding his drink out as he does.
"ok, i wasn't in love with him and i was just helping out a friend."
"please, when he left town you stayed in your pyjamas for a month and i saw you eat a cheeseburger." monica exposes phoebe and the group gasps, gianna sharing a shocked glance with chandler, both looking away from each other before they started giggling like school girls. "well, didn't you?"
"i might have."
"i can't believe you didn't tell me." monica mutters, shaking her head.
"oh, c'mon, like you told her everything." gianna laughs, standing up for phoebe.
"what have i not told her?" monoca scoffs, folding her arms across her chest.
"oh, i don't know." gianna thinks for a moment before pacing behind the sofa. "umm, how about the fact that the underwear out there on the telephone pole in yours from when you were having sex with fun bobby out on the terrace." gianna points, watching the group explode into shock as they rush to the terrace.
"wait a minute, who told you?" monica glares, following gianna's gentle gaze as she bites her fingernails. "you are dead meat." monica continues, tone scathing as she looks at a sheepish chandler.
"i didn't know it was a big secret." he teases, wiggling her finger.
"oh it's not big, not at all, you know, kinda along the same lines as, say, oh i don't know, having a third nipple!" monica accuses, pointing up at chandler dramatically. gianna chokes on her juice, eyes widening at chandler.
"you have a third nipple?"
"you bitch." chandler seethes, staring down at monica.
"oh my god, my boyfriend has a third nipple." gianna mutters, glancing around the group with a shocked expression.
"whip it out, whip it out." ross chants.
"c'mon there's nothing' to see, it's just a tiny bump, it's totally useless." chandler explains, stepping away from the group.
"oh as, as opposed to your other multi-functional nipples?" rachel stammers, looking over to gianna who was trying to suppress a laugh.
"i can't believe you. you told me it was a nubbin." joey shakes his head, watching chandler closely.
"joey, what did you think a nubbin was?"
"i don't know, you see something, you hear a word, i thought that's what it was." joey tries to explain, but notices the group's look. "let me see it again."
"yeah, show it! show it!" the group cheers, trying to coax chandler into revealing his third nipple.
"joey was in a porno movie!"
"wah!" joey exclaims, jumping back as the group turns to look at him quickly. gianna's eyes widen, staring at her brother in disbelief.
"if i'm going down, i'm taking everybody with me."
"you were in a porno?" ross chokes, watching joey closely.
"ahhh, alright, alright, alright." joey repeats, settling down to tell everyone. as he does, gianna steps over to chandler, watching his shoulders release when he sees her. chandler gently wraps his arm around her shoulders, heart beating fast when her arms wrap around his middle tightly. "i was young and i just wanted a job. ok? but at the last minute, i coulnd't go through with it so they let me be the guy who comes in to fix the copier but can't cause there's people having sex on it."
"that is wild!" monica cries, watching joey nod his head with a smirk.
"so, what's it shaped like?" ross asks, turning to face chandler again.
"yeah, is there a hair on it?"
"what happens if you flick it?" the group begins to ask questions, gianna trying to shield chandler from them, giggles rolling over her lips.
*
"so, uh, does it do anything, you know, special?" ross questions, leaning over to where chandler and gianna sat cozily beside him. gianna was curled up into chandler's side, knees tucked under her chin as they read a magazine together.
"why yes ross, pressing my third nipple opens the delivery entrance to the magical land of narnia." he replies, not looking up from his magazine.
"you know, in some cultures having a third nipple is actually a sign of virility. you get the best huts and women dance naked around you." beside ross, julie leans forward and smirks slightly at chandler.
"huh? are, uh, any of these cultures, per chance, in the tri-state area?" gianna quickly hits the back of her hand against his chest, furrowing her brows. chandler smiles cheekily at her, pressing a chaste kiss to her temple.
"you know, you are so amazing, is there anything you, you don't know?" ross gushes, holding julie's hand. behind the couples, rachel glumly sits opposite monica at the counter. through the front door of the coffee house, phoebe steps inside, a round of cheers and whistles fill the place.
"woah!"
"foxy lady!" joey nods, eyeing phoebe up and down.
"where you goin'?" julie asks, phoebe walking behind the sofa to talk to monica and rachel. gianna sits up slightly, swinging her legs over chandler's lap, not even seconds later, a hand resting on her thigh.
"um, i'm going to meet duncan, he's skating tonight at the garden. he's in the capades."
"the ice capades?" joey asks with enthusiasm.
"no, no the gravel capades." gianna shakes her head, tongue poking inside her cheek as she teases her brother.
"yeah, the turns aren't as fast but when snoopy falls...funny." chandler continues, watching gianna's face scrunch as she laughs. joey stares at the pair blankly, the slightest furrow in his brow.
"i can't believe you're dressing up for him. i mean, you're just, you're setting yourself up all over again." monica shakes her head slightly at phoebe who shakes her head in disagreement.
"ok, no. for you information i'm going to see him so i can put all those feelings behind me. ok, and the reason i'm dressed like this is because i think it's nice to look nice for your gay husband." phoebe explains, the rest of the group sharing a look. after a moment, gianna leans forward to pour more milk into her tea.
"oh, damn, we're all out of milk." she pauses, holding the pitcher in front of chandler's chest, flipping the lid open. "hey honey, would you fill me up here?" the rest of the group can't hide their laughter, gianna biting her lip at chandler turns to look at her slowly.
"oh i see, i see, because of the third nipple thing. ha...ha...ha..." he dissolves into a pool of embarrassment as gianna giggles quietly, squishing in beside him as a way of apologizing.
*
gianna felt elated, her body was constantly on fire-but not the scorching, searing, hot, painful kind, but the beautiful, poetic, tantalizing kind. she walked through the halls of the university to her office and settling down into some work.
"knock knock." behind her, regan was leaning against the door frame, sleeves pushed up to his elbows as he folded his arms.
"hey reg-" a sudden realisation dawned on gianna, a very real and heart-wrenching realisation.
"oh that's a new one, kind of hoping that one doesn't catch on..." he teases, now leaning back against her desk. his figure towered over her and gianna almost thought about not saying anything. "so, what do you say to dinner tonight, at mine?" and well, now she had to tell him.
"uh, regan, there's actually something i need to talk to you about."
"okay, is this a sit-down kind of thing, or would i be better lying down?" gianna suppresses the laugh bubbling up her throat.
"regan, i like you a lot, but i just think we are maybe better off as friends..." she trails off, trying to read his facial expressions, but he was giving away nothing. "i'm sorry."
"no, gianna, really, it's okay." there's a pause, comfortable. "to be truthful, when we went to your apartment the other night, i had a feeling there was uh, someone else." regan smiles softly, nodding at gianna.
"i'm still sorry. i feel as though i led you on."
"well, maybe a little-" gianna gives regan a look "-but, nothing will change our friendship, okay? besides, i have a proposition for you."
"oh?"
"my friend over at the bronx zoo is leaving his position, something about a better offer internationally." gianna nods in understanding. "and he offered me an interview, but i've already applied for another position there, plus i don't think that role suits me so much-"
"regan, get to the point." gianna laughs, leaning back on her chair.
"so, i asked if i could give a recommendation, and agreed. how does the international relations officer at the bronx zoo sound?" a wide smile crosses gianna's cheeks.
"oh my god, that sounds amazing!"
"great! i'll let him know you want an interview." regan nods, a charming smile pulling at the corner of his lips.
"oh, thank you so much regan!" gianna stands from her chair and watches regan hold out his hand for a handshake. "i think we are past hand shakes mr grant." she teases, wrapping her arms around his middle. "thank you for everything." beside them, the phone rings and gianna sees the familar coloured blinker flashing. "i better take this, see you around?"
"of course." regan bids farewell to gianna and shuts her office door behind him quietly.
"hey ross, what's up?" gianna smiles, placing the phone on speaker. as the pair worked in similar industries and gianna always had questions for ross for her classes, they found it easier to put each other on their work speed dials.
"julie and i are having everyone over for dinner tonight, can you make it?"
"what time?"
"sixish?"
"sounds perfect, i'll see you guys then!"
"bye-bye."
*
at ross' apartment, him and julie are setting the table.
"julie, can you hold this for a second, thanks." he hands her a bowl before taking her cheeks in his hands and kissing her. the rest of the group beside phoebe and gianna gather inside, chandler sneering when he sees the couple making out.
"uh, julie?"
"yeah?" she mutters, her and ross breaking their kiss.
"sorry, you had a paleontologist on your face. but, uh, it's gone now, you're alright." he teases, the rest of the goup following behind him as they begin to sit around the table.
"hey, chan, where's gianna?"
"oh, she had some work to do, she should be here soon." he nods, leaning forward on his elbows.
"so, how's it going? you two finally together..." monica wiggles her brows at chandler, the others following suit, except for joey.
"don't say anything wrong here buckaroo."
"buckaroo? whatever, uh, yeah it's great."
"it's great? that's it!" rachel stammers, gesturing with her arms. chandler shrugs, leaning back on his chair.
"okay fine, it's like i'm living the dream-" as he speaks, the front door clicks open.
"what's like living the dream?" from the door, gianna calls out as she places her coat on the coat rack.
"ross living in this apartment! that's what!" chandler answers, his smile widening into a smirk when he sees gianna walk around the corner of the wall.
"you come straight from work gigi?" joey asks, raising an eyebrow at her office attire.
"yeah, i was tutoring a student." she shrugs, walking over to wear chandler sat.
"can i just say, those pants make your butt look fantastic." he teases, taking a hold of her hand as she rests it on his shoulder. gianna flushes a deep shade of red, joey turning to stare sternly at chandler.
"ha, thanks honey." she whimpers, voice small as she flushes with embarrassment.
*
after dinner, the group had sat around ross' living room, gianna and monica sitting together on the sofa.
"what's this in my pocket? why it's joey's porno movie!" chandler exclaims, pulling the tape from his pocket. gianna flushes a deep shade of red, sinking into the sofa as the group glances at joey.
"pop it in!" ross cheers.
"i'm fine with it, i mean, if you're okay watching a video filled with two nippled people." joey shrugs, chandler continuing to put the tape. into the player.
"great, people having sex, that's just what i need to see." rachel groans, holding her glass in her hand.
"what's wrong with people having sex?"
"well, well um, you know, these movies are offensive and uh, degrading to women and females. and uh, and the lighting's always unflattering. and, monica help me out here." rachel begins to explain before turning to her friend for back up.
"hell, i wanna see joey." she smiles, grooving with the cheesy porn disco music.
"so, is there like a story or do they just start doing it right..." julie trails off, eyes widening slightly "oh, never mind."
"ok, now wait a minute. that is the craziest typing test i've ever seen." chandler jokes, pointing at the screen from his new seat beside gianna. she was still smushed back into the cushions, chandler's hand brushing up and down her knee.
"all i say is she better get the job."
"looks to me like he's the one getting the job." ross jokes, arm slung over julie's shoulders.
"shhh, ok, here i come, here i come. see i'm coming to fix the copier, i can't get to the copier, i'm thinkin what do i do, what do i do....so i just watch em have sex. and then i say, wait, here's my line," he pauses, letting the tv speak.
"you know that's bad for the paper tray..."
"nice work my friend." chandler nods, the group continuing to watch.
"thank you. wait, wait, wait, you see me again. hand on, the guy's butt's blockin me. there i am, there i am, there i am, there i am..."
*
some time had passed, the porno movie long finished as the group continued to lounge around ross' apartment. gianna had fallen asleep against chandler a long time ago, back pressed against his chest as she snores softly.
"you know, it still smells like monkey in there." monica mentions, stepping out of the bathroom.
"that saves us a conversation." julie mumbles, ross smiling down at her cheekily.
"well, listen, this had been great but we're officially wiped." chandler nods, glancing down at gianna quickly.
"me too, we should get goin'." joey adds, beginning to stand from the arm chair.
"no, no, i mean no, c'mon you guys, i mean, c'mon look it's only eleven thirty. let's just talk, we never just hang out and talk anymore." rachel pleads.
"rachel, that's all we do." monica replies, sitting up on the floor.
"maybe that's all we do. what about julie?"
"what about julie?" julie questions, raising her eyebrows confused.
"well, you have been in our lives for nearly two months now and we don't really know you. i mean, who is julie? i mean, what do you like, what don't you like? we wanna hear everything." rachel rambles, sitting opposite julie on the coffee table.
"well, that could take a while."
"so. i mean, who here does not have the time to get to know julie?" rachel gestures to the group seated around her.
"i got the time to get to know julie." chandler shrugs, settling back into the sofa and tugging gianna closer to him.
"i got time."
"rach, i know her pretty well, can i go?" monica asks, however, rachel gives her a stern look. "that's fine."
"ok, julie, so now let's start with your childhood, what was that like?"
"well, in a nutshell..." julie goes to begin but rachel cuts her off.
"nah, uh, uh."
some more time had passed, the rest of the group began to fall asleep as julie told rachel everything.
"and my second grade teacher was ms thomas, and my first grade teacher was mrs cobb." julie continues, rachel furrowing her brows.
"mrs, mrs gobb?"
"no cobb, as in a cobb salad." rachel nods in understanding as julie corrects her.
"now, what exactly is in a cobb salad."
"i'm going home." chandler announces, quickly pulling a confused gianna from the sofa with him. joey and monica follow closely behind, rachel looking around in defeat.
"what's going on?" gianna mutters sleepily, a yawn escaping her lips as chandler pulls her away from ross' apartment.
"tell yer later..." he slurs, yawning beside her.
chandler never told gianna what happened, instead the pair climbed into bed without changed and curled under the covers, not remember walking back from ross' apartment with joey and monica.
*
not edited.
i'm back baby!
i hope you all had a wonderful christmas, and if you don't celebrate christmas, happy holidays!
hopefully should be uploading more chapters more regularly!
love, pipes x