Ava's POV:
The sentence replayed in my mind over and over like a broken record.
After Seth's big announcement, he left me in my own thoughts.
Unwanted thoughts such as:
If they didn't sleep together, why lie?
Whose baby was Mina carrying?
Did Luke know the baby isn't his?
Was there a baby at all?
Was it me?
Was Luke finding a reason to divorce me?
But, why divorce me after twenty years?
Why didn't he do it before?
Was he using Mina to spite me?
I told myself to not think about it. It doesn't matter why they did what they did. None of it matters. Why? Because it never happened.
With the thoughts raging in my nightmares, it didn't take long for Spring break to roll around.
"It's the first day of Spring Break. Why the pout face pretty lady?" Eli returned to school for the last day before the official start of Spring Break.
Surprisingly, he didn't earn an earful from the teachers. They only told him they were glad to see him back. Then again, Eli is a fairly decent grade and behavior student - minus the public class skipping.
"Are you still upset that I didn't pick up your calls?" He asks. "I told you I wasn't feeling well."
"I understand."
"No." He circles until he is in front of me, "Don't be understanding. I'm in trouble! I'm a bad boy!"
Most days, I'm amused by Eli's behavior but the talk with Seth really puts me in a damp mood.
"You're not doing your sarcastic chuckle," he says. Eli held my face, "Something happened while I was gone?"
From the time I started interacting with Eli, I've noticed several things.
First, he's not-so-bad looking if he takes care of himself. But, he refuses to cut his hair.
Second, he acts like he's weak but he can hold his weight. Then again, I don't weigh that much - do I?
Third, Eli is a master at reading the atmosphere. He understands when and when not to intervene. When to step forward and when to back down.
The sound of motorcycles rushing into the streets and we turned our heads to see Seth racing toward his house. He parked the motorcycle and our eyes met. Seth nods lightly as a greeting gesture before he walks into the house.
I'm certain he's waiting for my desperate ass to go over there and beg him for more information.
My pride won't allow that.
No matter how many sleepless nights build up.
Lost in my thoughts, I stared at Seth's house for a bit too long for comfort and forgot the person in front of me.
"Hello?" Eli waves a hand in front of me, "Your boyfriend still exists."
I close my eyes to collect my thoughts for a few seconds. "Sorry. I zone out."
Eli chuckles, "And here I thought you were thinking about Seth."
"Well, he did fly past us."
Eli played with his thumbs before he asked a question which dampens both of our moods. Not like it wasn't already dampened before. "You guys hung out?"
I shrugged, "Yeah. Kind of." If you consider low-key threatening and one-up-ing each other hanging out.
"I thought you...hated him."
I look at Eli, "What made you think that?" Was I that obvious?
"Well, your sarcastic comments and dirty looks, or was I reading into that too much?"
Eli is spot on.
"You're reading into it too much," I said. "Seth and I are...friends." I almost wanted to throw up saying that, but I have to practice and learn how to make it sound believable.
"Oh, friends." There is an obvious discomfort in Eli's voice, one which I can't ignore.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Nothing." He stands up and hides his hands, "I'm- nothing."
I followed his lead, "Nothing sounds like something and you better spill that something Eli because you know better than to hide something behind nothing with me." I hope that made some sense.
"I'm just surprised because you never told me that you and Seth are friends."
I folded my arms, "Am I supposed to tell you who I'm friends with?"
"Just thought it might be nice to know."
"Nice to know or nice to keep track?"
"Is there a difference?"
"There may be now."
This type of conversation is not how I wanted to start my Spring Break. Not how I want to spend what's supposed to be a relaxing week.
"Alright." He holds his hands above his head, "No. Nope. I'm not going to do it."
"Do what?"
"You know what I mean."
"No. Elijah. You're not making any sense." And he better explain it to me now because we both know, I never use his full name.
Eli takes a deep breath, "I don't like it."
"You don't like it?"
"I don't like it that you're hanging out with Seth."
"What?" There's a smile on my face, but it's more of a you-are-kidding me type of smile.
"Yeah. I don't like it."
"You don't like it?" I'm attempting to wrap my mind around his statement. "Why?"
"He gives me uncomfortable vibes."
"Uncomfortable vibes?"
He crosses his arms, something he rarely does, "You know I thought I made it clear that I don't feel comfortable seeing you together."
"When did you make that point?"
He shrugs, "I don't know. Maybe when I asked him to stop eye fucking my girlfriend."
I'm conflicted.
Am I upset?
Or am I turned on?
"Look, we were just hanging out."
He takes a step closer, "Really?"
"Nothing is going on and you're blowing things out of proportion."
"I am blowing things out of proportion?"
I let out a small chuckle, "Did I stutter?"
Eli sniffs lightly before he turns his back on me to gather some air.
I should stay quiet, allow this silence to cool our heads. Oh, who the fuck am I fooling? "I don't know what the big deal is?"
He turns back, in an almost ominous manner, "The big deal is-" he lashes out, "he-"
"So what?" Don't do it. Don't take another step. "You hang out with Mary all the time." Ah, shit. You did it. "You don't see me bringing that up."
"Mary has nothing to do with this."
"I'm pretty sure Mary has something to do with this."
He tilted his head, and not in a cute manner either. "Oh?"
He's not backing down.
"Entertain me. How?"
And neither will I.
"Oh, hahaha Eli let's build a haunted house together."
"We were in a classroom project together!"
"Oh, hahaha Eli let's hang out and share this joke no one will understand."
"You hate my jokes!"
"Oh, Eli, let's watch a new movie without asking your girlfriend!"
"You hate watching horror movies!"
"Who says?!"
"You!"
"Well, have you ever considered that I may have changed my mind?"
Eli grunt and turned around again. "Unbelievable. Unbelievable," he repeated. Eli turns back with his palms pressed together, "Okay. This- maybe, we need to take a breath." He takes a deep breath and then waits for me to do what he says.
I exhale sharply, "Look, Seth is a friend." At least saying this a second time is less nauseating.
Eli crosses his arms, "So, you're going to continue hanging out with him?"
"Yeah."
"And that's it huh."
"Yeah."
Eli sniffed lightly, "And even if I said I feel uncomfortable seeing you two together?"
Before I would agree with him and dodge Seth but now I realize I can't do that forever.
I shrugged, "I don't feel comfortable when you hang out with certain others but you don't see me complaining."
"You mean Mary?"
I step closer, "It means I trust you."
"I trust you."
"Then, start acting like it."
"I just don't trust him." When I didn't respond, Eli nodded once before he said: "I need to go."
I didn't acknowledge his statement.
Eli exhaled a soft breath before a chuckle-like sound exit, "I see," were the last words he said before he left.
The day feels exhausting, not the physical type of exhaustion but the mental one that somehow drained all your power.
Two days passed since our fight and neither of us raised our flag of surrender to make some grounds for negotiations.
My hand gripped the phone and I swallowed firmly.
"You look like a bucket of sunshine."
Most days I wouldn't be surprised to hear that voice since he's like a cockroach, he's always lurking around.
But, right now, it's different.
"This is my backyard, what are you doing here?"
"Brought over some pie," he says. "You should try it."
"Why?" I asked. Seth never brought over pies or anything before.
"Well-" He sat beside me, "thought you may need some pie after the hurricane."
I closed my eyes momentarily and exhaled, "You saw."
"The whole neighborhood saw," he says. "You guys weren't exactly quiet about it."
"I don't recall raising my voice."
He hums lightly in protest, "I wouldn't necessarily say that."
I groaned and pressed my hands against my face, "How loud were we?" I really don't remember raising my voice at Eli, but with the both of us drowning in emotions, I wouldn't have doubted that we did without realizing it.
"Remember the birds chirping while you guys were fighting?"
"What? What in the world are you talking about?"
"Do you remember? Yes or no?"
"No."
"That's how loud you guys were."
"What does birds-"
"You guys were so loud, the birds flew away-" he says, "in fear."
My face was back into my palms, "Why can't you talk normally?"
"Come on Makee." He crosses one leg above the other, "Where's the fun in that?"
I turned my head towards him, "You find joy in this, don't you?"
He nods, "Yeah."
I sat there and debated whether or not I should commit murder. Considering how I'm underage, they would most likely send me to the juvenile hall. Is it worth it? Spending some time and having a record? My parents would surely be disappointed. But, I'm sure they will get over it once I'm out of juvie and turn a new leaf.
"Don't you think you're overreacting?" Seth dares to say.
I look at him again, "What?"
"You know, you're kind of blowing things out of proportion."
"I am blowing things out of proportion?" Oh, deja vu.
He smiles, "Did I stutter?" And unlike me who said it out of pure frustration and rage, Seth said it out of delight.
I swing an arm toward his chest and pull him closer, "Say it again. I dare you."
His brows inch together, "It's a high school relationship sweetheart. I wouldn't dream of a happy ending."
"Don't call me sweetheart," I hissed out.
Seth raises his arms, and I push him back.
"Seriously though," he grumbles, "Chill. You're like sixteen, dating another sixteen years old."
The longer I sat there and allowed Seth's words to sink in, the more sense they made. I am a teenager, dating another teenager, and we're fighting about who made the other feel uncomfortable.
"Oh my-"
Seth leans back and chuckles, "Finally sunk in?"
"Shut up."
"I mean, it makes sense."
"No, it doesn't."
"Well, think about it," he says. "You went back in time so your brain is currently underdeveloped. It has the thoughts, hormones, and whatever of a teenager. And what does a teenager do?"
"Act stupid."
"I was going to say, overreact based on their emotions, but yeah- that."
With the months going so smoothly, I started to feel even more uncomfortable - as if this is the calm before the big storm. My relationship with my family, friends, and partner had been driving in such a smooth lane, I'm afraid the bumps may come. And perhaps, that's why I erupt with Eli. If I created the bumps then anything that comes forward wouldn't seem so bad.
"So, why are you here? Other than to tease me about my overreaction."
Seth exhaled dramatically before he stood up, "Mina called and we talked."
"Yeah?"
He rolls his eyes, "She loves you."
"Who doesn't?"
"So, I'm here to offer some advice."
There's a type of uncomfortable quietness in the air as the sun strikes past the clouds. It's been cloudy the whole day despite it being April. I should be out having fun right now instead of moping in my backyard. Maybe that's what I'll do later.
"As I said earlier, we're still young. Don't take whatever is happening now so seriously."
"I don't speak cryptic."
Seth blows out a light raspberry, "Without the cryptic," he says. "What I'm trying to tell you is-"
There it is again, the quiet.
"Spit it out, Carrillo."
"You should break up with Eli."
So, persistent.