Cana stuffed her hands in her coat pockets as soon as she stepped out of her car, her entire body chilled from being out for so long.
At first, she'd wanted to wait out in the parking lot for Mirajane's shift to end, but then she started to feel anxious, so she'd gone on a drive around the town. It probably would've been smarter to turn the heat up in the car, but she just wasn't feeling right at all, and she had hoped that the coldness would keep her mind occupied.
Gildarts meant well, he always does, but he really wasn't helping right now. It was hard enough finding the time to be happy with where she's been right now, Cana just wanted to be able to enjoy these feelings of peace she got during these trysts.
She hated feeling so many emotions at once like this. Maybe Gildarts is right, maybe she should rethink what effect this arrangement has on her mentally, but it's just so easy to not think about it. They were having fun, pleasing each other to forget about whatever stressful situations they were in. It didn't have to be any deeper than that. It isn't any deeper than that.
But what made Cana the most anxious was the fact that she really needed a drink right now.
Get it together. Don't let her see you upset, she'd feel terrible.
She opened the side door, knowing it'd be unlocked already because she told Mira she'd be here after her shift. The warmth inside made her sigh in relief, and slipped out of her coat and tossed it on the rack beside the door.
She didn't have to venture far to find Mirajane- she was pacing the living room and speaking loudly into her phone- so Cana decided to sit on the couch to make her presence known without bothering her.
Mira seemed very agitated, if the tone of her voice and the way she just couldn't stand in one spot was anything to go by. Cana didn't want to be nosy, but it wasn't like she was making any effort to conceal the conversation she was having with whoever she was calling, so listening in a bit shouldn't hurt...
"...No, but you can't keep coming in late! Because if I let you do it, I'd have to let everyone do it!"
Whoever it was on the other line definitely had to be someone who works at the restaurant, most likely one of her siblings.
"I understand, but maybe this is a conversation you just have to have with her, then. Because if you don't say something, I will." Mira angrily inhaled through a nicotine pen in her hand and huffed out an even angrier puff of smoke.
"If you're scared to set that boundary with her, then- No, stop that, I don't hate her. But if she's gonna keep being difficult, then I'd like to talk to her in private."
It's been a long, long time since Cana has heard one of Mira's threats, that woman always found a way to say the scariest things with the nicest words.
"What- Of course not, I'm not a monster," She wasn't facing her, but Cana could just sense the dramatic eye-roll Mirajane delivered, "I'm not going to hurt her, calm down. But I mean it, I have to set an example, and letting my little brother get away with anything he wants at work isn't right. If you still want those hours, you have to act like it."
The large cloud of vape that filled the area made Cana instinctively turn around, only to see Mira looking so grumpy it was scary, so she faced forward again. In all honesty, she wouldn't be surprised if she got kicked out right now. The moment probably isn't right.
"Fine, we'll talk later, bye." Mira threw her phone on the couch and sighed, and when she sat down beside Cana, the brunette finally looked her in the eyes.
She looked exhausted, and she was wondering if her presence here was even a good thing at this point.
"...You okay?" The brunette asked, her voice quiet as if she was afraid to speak.
Mira studied her face for long enough to make her squirm uncomfortably, and then reached out to rest her hand on her thigh, "I'm fine. That was just Elfman."
"Oh... Do you wanna talk about-"
"He's been coming in late to work for, like, a month straight. I let it slide because I know Evergreen is pregnant and he says she's just been needy lately, but he'd been asking for a bigger promotion so he can make more money for his family, but how can I allow that? I'm not going to just give him better opportunities when he's not putting in the work... I don't want to be mean but I've got more than just his feelings to consider here."
Cana nodded silently, completely intrigued by the way Mira was actually venting to her. Usually, she puts a sweet smile on her face and acts like everything is perfect. It's nice to hear talk about her true feelings, like she's getting more comfortable with her...
"And he thinks I just don't like Evergreen, but that's not necessarily true... I mean, she has her moments, but I've always been supportive of their relationship, I think they're good together. Maybe it's because she's scared of me, but whatever. It's not like I want it to be harder for him to make money, but... Ugh, maybe I should just give him a loan or something outside of work? That way I'd be helping him as a big sister and not being unfair as a boss."
She hit her vape again, trying to take this edge off, but she set it down on her coffee table as she started to consider her guest. A light pink dusted her cheeks as the situation dawned on her, leaving her feeling a bit embarrassed with acting out of character like this. "I'm sorry, let's just forget about all that. How was your day?"
Cana narrowed her eyes, not appreciating what she knew Mirajane was trying to do. "Don't apologize, you're allowed to not feel good sometimes, and you're allowed to vent. You're always open to hearing everyone else's problems, you shouldn't feel guilty about your own."
The blush on Mira's face darkened, and her hand rode up higher on the brunette's thigh. "Thank you... But I think I got most of it off of my chest. Talking about something else would make me feel better..."
"Okay, well, i'm sorry that I couldn't make it to the Café during your break, I ended up talking to Gildarts like you told me to- mmph!" Cana's words were cut off by Mira's lips, she pulled her in by her coat and was exploring the depths of her mouth with her tongue in record speed.
She had no time to catch up as Mira started to kiss her like her life depended on it, easing her way onto her lap and tugging her coat off of her.
After savoring the experience for a bit, Cana gently pushed her away. "Mirajane!"
"I'm sorry, I just really needed that," She giggled as if she wasn't just violating her face a second ago, "You can keep talking now, I'm listening."
"As I was saying," Cana grabbed at Mira's hips, her face a look of mock-annoyance, "I talked to my dad and, well, it kinda went how I thought it would."
"And how's that?"
"...Not so great. Just like I thought, he really has his reservations about you. He basically told me I shouldn't be doing this because it's not safe, based on your past."
Mirajane's eyes widened, and the silence that followed had Cana wishing she would've said that in a more sugar-coated way. Although deep in thought, Mira traced Cana's fingers with her own before trailing her touches up and down her arms. "I see... I guess I expected that, too."
"But he's totally just being paranoid. I'm not worried about it."
"I mean, he does have a point."
"Um, what?"
"I did have a pretty fucked up past," The following sweet giggles that came out of Mira's mouth did not fit what she'd said at all, "I've been a part of things you'd never believe. If I was a parent, I wouldn't want my kid around me either."
Cana frowned deeply at that, "But Mira-"
"I like to believe that time in my life was led by a different version of me, a version that I've smothered down somewhere... but the truth is, it'll always be me, and I've learned that it's better to acknowledge and accept rather than forget and ignore... I was young then, well, younger, and I think I learned a lot from those... experiences... and after Lisanna had gotten hurt, I... I think it's important that we don't pretend it never happened, I guess as a reminder of what going down a path like that can do."
"I get that, and I'm not trying to act like you weren't a menace to society then, but... I don't want to minimize all the changes you've made and say that you can never be trusted because of some bad choices you've made when you were 18."
Something in Mira's eyes changed, and her expression became unreadable as her voice lowered to a whisper, "You're awfully confident that I'm not just as crazy as I used to be."
Her face bright red, Cana tried to stop herself from getting turned on from that sultry tone of voice, "What are you trying to say? You're still out here doing illegal shit?"
"Maybe, maybe not. Maybe you'll never find out."
"...Are you just saying that to be all sexy and mysterious right now? 'Cause you can't fool me."
Mira's resolve broke as she leaned back in a fit of laughter, "So I'm assuming you don't like the 'bad girl' type, then?"
"You're too cute to be an intimidating 'bad girl' to me, sorry," Her laughter was too contagious, Cana found herself joining her and pulling her closer, "Well, not when you're horny, though. You turn into a sex-demon when you're horny."
"A what?" Mira laughed even harder, "You mean like a succubus?"
"If the shoe fits..."
"That's funny... Have you noticed my pelvis tattoo..?" Pulling down the waistband of her pants, Mira exposed the smooth skin of her pelvic area, a part of her that Cana has been well acquainted with by now.
"Yeah, of course. You know how many times I've been down there..?"
"No, silly. Have you noticed what it is?" She traced the little heart tattoo there with her pinky finger, "It's a succubus heart. I was supposed to go back and get the rest of the details done so it'd actually look like a succubus symbol, but... Well, I initially got it because my ex used to refer to me as a succubus, but we broke up before I got the whole tattoo done."
Suddenly, Cana's hold on her hips slacked and her throat went dry. "Your ex..?"
"Yeah. And if I'd gone to a shop, I could've gotten the whole thing done in one session. But this tat was a stick-and-poke, done by ex himself, so you can imagine why I decided against getting the rest of it done. I still think it's cute like this, though."
Although she went back to tracing over the ink on her skin, Mira was paying close attention to how Cana had gone silent, and the short breaths she was taking in. She looked up into her violet eyes, held her gaze for a moment, and whispered, "What's wrong?"
Despite herself, Cana had started to remember the conversation she'd had this morning. With all of the anxiety she'd had from the conversation with her father, she completely forgot about the things Natsu told her. She really wished she didn't remember, because although she'd humored the idea of asking Mira about it, all of it made her feel things that she felt like she shouldn't be feeling.
And for some reason, Cana felt like Mira already knew the answer to the question she asked. "I-it's nothing... I'm just... curious, I guess. Who, um, who is your ex?"
"Hm... Why?"
"Like I said, just curious. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."
Mira narrowed her eyes. "Why do I get the feeling that you don't actually want to know who my ex is..?"
It was easy to forget how well this woman can read people. "Alright, fine, it's just that Natsu told me some things earlier and it made me feel confused, I guess? I dunno, but I would've forgotten all about it if you hadn't mentioned that."
Now, there was a hint of worry on her face, which only made Cana feel worse. "What do you mean Natsu told you some 'things'?"
"Just things about your past. Well, past relationships specifically."
"...What kind of conversation were you having for Natsu to have felt the need to bring something like that up?"
Oh shit... Cana needed to think of an excuse and fast, but all she could do was stare at her in a bug-eyed daze. At this point, she'd have no choice but to confess that she'd gone and blabbed about their hookups.
By some miracle, though, Mirajane decided to take pity on her. "Actually, forget it, it's not important," She ignored the heavy sigh that the brunette let out, "The ex I'm referring to is Laxus, but I'd like to know what Natsu told you."
"Oh... He told me about Laxus, and he also mentioned Erza."
"Erza?" The way Mira's voice grew wistful and the fond smile on her face brought back those weird feelings in Cana's chest. "That felt like so long ago, wow..."
"So it's true? I guess I should've noticed... You guys were together while she and I lived with Makarov, right?"
"Yes, during highschool. Gosh, she was such a goody-two-shoes, rule-following prude. We couldn't stand each other for years. When we dated, I used to convince her to skip classes with me and she'd spend the entire time freaking out, ugh, and it was so adorable. We ended it when Jellal moved back in town, I don't think either of us saw our relationship going long term, anyway. Oh, and don't tell her you know any of this, she still gets super embarrassed about it."
"Of course. But at least you guys are still friends after all of that, yeah?"
"Oh yes, we got on each other's nerves but there was never any bad blood. I do think nowadays Erza does a much better job of not making our history with each other obvious, but it's just that I can't resist the urge to tease her, so I like to hint at it sometimes, y'know?"
"Right... And, er, what about Laxus?"
"Oh," She was doing that cute little laugh again, making Cana suppress a grimace, "That one's a bit more complicated..."
"How so?"
"Well, we dated off and on for years, even since before I dated Erza. But during our 'off' moments we still hooked up... I guess it's because of all the time I spent visiting my siblings at Makarov's house, we were always seeing each other. Right now we're not together, I think we're done with all of that, but like I said, we still see each other..."
Knowing her past history with Erza wasn't so bad, but something about knowing that she's still involved with Laxus made Cana suppress a scream. "When was the last time you... saw him?"
"Um... About 2 weeks ago."
"Oh... Does he know about me?"
"Depends. Do the people you hook up with know about me?"
"...I haven't hooked up with anyone other than you since we started dong this."
"Oh?" One of Mira's eyebrows rose, but her eyes told that she wasn't really surprised, "Cute. To answer your question, yes, Laxus knows. And if it makes you feel better, he's the only other person I've been seeing for a while now. Well, occasionally Freed will join, but we don't need to get into the nitty gritty details."
"Hey, you can hook up with whoever you want, I'm not the boss of you."
"I know, but still, safe sex is important and I think it's fair to have an understanding of how many people someone is active with before you do it with them."
"True..."
Mira tilted her head to the side when she saw the way Cana let her gaze fall, and she hooked her finger under the brunette's chin to get her to look her in the eyes. The seconds she spent quietly observing her felt like hours to Cana, and trying to act like everything was fine was out of the question.
"Are you okay, sweetheart?"
"I..." Ignoring any bit of embarrassment inside her, she sighed, "It's just a little intimidating to think about the type of people you're used to. Erza and Laxus are, like, miles out of my league. Makes me wonder why you decided to start this with me if you could've been doing this with someone better, I guess."
Mira's entire demeanor softened and she shifted in Cana's lap, momentarily making her shudder. "I see, so that's why you seemed more uncomfortable talking about my past relationships than my past with literal crime."
"...I guess so."
"Perhaps you should reevaluate some things about yourself. Does the fact that I initiated this between us not make you think that you're exactly my type and I'm truly not 'out of your league' at all?"
With a shrug, Cana averted her gaze, "Just figured it was only 'cause you knew how much of slut I am and that fucking me would help me from being in a depressed funk from getting rejected by my best friend."
"Dear... You think you're the only slut here? I've wanted to do this with you for a year now. I just finally saw the opportunity when you were going through it with Lucy... Which I confess was selfish of me, so I do still want to actually help you if you need it, be it through sex or not. I really hate how lowly you think of yourself, you shouldn't compare yourself to anyone like that, your worth shouldn't be measured in comparison to anyone else. Especially not someone like Laxus, you're a thousand times more tolerable than him, trust me."
A chuckle slipped past Cana's lips as her cheeks softened, and she went back to gripping Mira's hips, "Thanks, I gotta work on being less insecure."
"Everyone faces insecurity at times, but if it becomes unbearable, please let me know. I could look into some helpful resources for you."
"Thanks, you're the sweetest..." She pulled her into a soft kiss, one that had Mira arching her back and subtly rocking into her. "You got any other ex-related tattoos I should know about?"
They both laughed under their breaths, and Mira shook her head, "No, all of my other tattoos were gang-related. Oh, except this one," She showed off the side of her right middle finger, "This was my first stick-and-poke I did myself, mostly for practice."
The side of her finger had the word 'BAMF' tatted in cursive, and Cana couldn't help but snicker at the thought of this sweet little vixen in her lap referring to herself as a 'bad-ass-motherfucker,' despite how true it may be. "For the longest time I just thought that was a bruise or something. Had no clue it was a tattoo."
"What?" Mira pouted, "I said it was my first one! I didn't really know what I was doing..."
"You got that right." Cana laughed harder at the little glare she received, it was always so exhilarating to see her make a face other than a polite smile. "I'm just teasing," She grabbed onto Mira's hand and kissed her knuckles, "It's not that bad, really. I love your little fingers regardless, though... They're just so delicate..."
Now Mirajane's face morphed into a coy smile. She breathed out a laugh, her deft fingers snaking out of her hold and venturing beneath the waistband of Cana's pants. "My fingers love you too, princess."
"M-Mira!" The brunette gasped from the sudden attention her sensitive skin was getting, it seemed like she'd never be able to keep up with this minx.
"That's it, say my name..." Mira swallowed each of Cana's moans, the sound muffled against her plump lips. Her fingers traveled further and rubbed harder the more they made out, until Cana started to break a sweat and her breaths grew shorter.
Cana whined when Mira eased out of her lap and stood up, but she was far from disappointed when she watched her fall to her knees immediately after. Her movements were almost too slow as she worked the brunette's pants down her legs, but she made up for it by delivering kisses to the inside of her thigh.
She pressed her thumb against the center of Cana's damp panties as she felt her grab onto the hair at the top of her head, licking over her covered sex and grinning at the mewl she earned in response.
"Mira... Don't tease me."
"Be patient," Mira's grin deepened as darkness filled her eyes, "I'm going to do whatever I want with this pussy."
Cana bit back a screech, her eyes rolling back as she felt that skilled tongue swirl over her clothed clit. Mira's thumbs traced over the outline of her lower lips, spreading her open and moving agonizingly slow.
"Do you want the strap tonight?"
With her eyes glazed over and her mind nearly blank, Cana could only wordlessly nod her head, which prompted Mira to stand up and give her a quick kiss on the lips before leaving to retrieve her strap-on.
She stared ahead at nothing, trying to figure out how they moved from having a casual conversation to her getting ready to be dicked down. But then again, this is the point of their relationship, after all.
A part of her wished they could spend more time just talking, spending time with Mirajane is always so nice. But she snuffed down whatever emotions that sparked up everytime she thought about it, because the last thing she needed right now was to complicate the last relationships she hasn't royally screwed up yet.
Hopefully, they can just stay like this, and she wouldn't be compelled to make this any more difficult than it needed to be.