"Killer, I'm so bored. I might just bust a nut if I don't get out of here."
Killer looked up from the book he was reading, closing it over his index finger so he wouldn't lose his place.
"I don't think you understand what you just said."
Approaching the couch, I continued to walk into the arm, letting myself flop over so my face fell into his thigh.
"Believe me. I do." I sighed, adjusting myself so I was looking up at him, head in his denim-clad lap. "I'm like a wild animal, Killer. I can't be caged like this."
I could almost hear the roll of the man's eyes as he discarded his book, slinging one arm over the back of the couch as his head tilted down.
"Go hang out with Heat. God knows he missed you." He suggested, but I shook my head.
"He's taking a nap. Wire's checking on how the Galley-La guys are going with the ship, Boogie and Bubblegum are out in town trying to get laid, UK, Mosh and Jaguar are hogging Tyrannosaurus, and everyone else is busy, too..." I listed off the rest of the crew, kicking my legs that hung over the arm of the couch.
Humming, Killer moved his hand to carefully brush a stray stand of hair out of my face, quickly pulling it back to rest on his own stomach.
"What about Kid? You usually jump at the chance to bother him." He questioned, his abdomen tensing when I smooshed my face into it.
"Dunno where he is. You're not doing much, so why can't you come cause trouble with me?" Even if I had known where Kid was, I wasn't sure whether or not I wanted to be alone with him. Things were up in the air, and I didn't want to make a greater fool of myself if he had just been messing with me.
"Since when have you known me to be a troublemaker, girl?" Killer scoffed lightly, the leg I wasn't using as a headrest bouncing a little. "Besides, I was reading."
Rolling my face back out of his stomach, I tilted my head all the way back to try and get a look at the book he had put down.
"What were you reading? Anything interesting?" I queried, thankful that he picked up to show me so I wouldn't snap my neck. "The Complete History of Water 7, Volume three. Sounds boring. Ransacking Iceberg's underwear drawer sounds way more entertaining."
Even though I've already done that. Twice.
I jostled along with Killer's shoulders when he laughed silently,
"Hey...why don't you ever laugh out loud?" He stopped the moment I asked, and I worried I may have crossed a line.
"My laugh is...not something you wanna hear. Trust me..." Killer murmured, setting the book back down where he had picked it up from.
"Try me." I challenged him boldly, feeling the hand he had previously held the book in tussle the ends of my hair.
"When I was younger, people thought I sounded like an absolute joke. Not that I really give much of a shit what people think of me...but it wore me down after a while. It's just a personal choice." He explained softly, and I frowned.
"I'll kick the ass of anyone who's ever laughed at you. I mean it." I insisted, and I felt him jostle again, his other arm moving to lay over me, careful not to push down against my chest.
"You sound an awful lot like a scrappy little shit I know..." He sighed fondly, fingers moving higher up through my hair before pausing. "You really should try to talk to Kid. Not taunt, or bicker, but actually talk..."
You keep bringing him up...
Pouting, I craned my neck a little more, managing to see just a little extra of his fuzz-covered chin beneath his helmet.
"Uh, have you even met the guy? It's like trying to have a conversation with a rabid baby bananagator. Besides, what would we even talk about? Scrap metal? The weather?"
Killer's hand that was hanging off over my side clenched and released a few times, and the man puffed out a breath.
"I know about the kiss, (Y/N)." He stated firmly, and I couldn't help but flinch. Why did it come as such a shock to me? It was Killer. Kid's closest friend, basically his brother. Why wouldn't he have told him?
"Ah..." I struggled to find a way to respond, which resulted in me just chewing on my lip like a moron.
"Do you love him?" Another out of the blue question, and I froze up, completely taken off guard.
Why is he asking me this?
"I...really don't know..." I finally managed to speak, averting my eyes to the ceiling. "I mean, I don't not like him? Interpreting feelings isn't exactly my strong suit..." Killer was silent for a while, but I didn't dare look at him. He was probably just looking out for Kid, and I respected that.
"So...does that mean I can do this..?" Raising a brow, I began to look back at him, confused.
"Do wha-"
Before I had even the slightest clue as to what was happening, Killer had flipped me beneath him, his much larger, stronger form pinning me down the the couch cushions. It certainly startled me, the squeak I let out was proof of that, but I wasn't frightened.
"If I were to kiss you right now, like Kid did, what would you think?" Killer asked me in all seriousness, his knee pushing high up between my legs, dangerously close to touching my crotch.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Shifting nervously under his body, I gulped back the jumble of my upcoming words, hoping I wouldn't sound like a blathering idiot.
"I...don't know..." I murmured quietly, unsure of where my volume ran away to.
"Would you hate me, and push me away? Or would you fall for me instead? Are you really gonna lay there and tell me you have no idea?" He pushed for some kind of definitive answer, but I really didn't know.
I knew I had strong feelings towards Kid, but where would that lead? He was a difficult person, and seemed incapable of all the things that were supposed to be important for that kind of relationship. Killer? I cared for him too, and he was nowhere near as brash or insufferable.
"Wh..What do you want me to say..? I just don't know." I wasn't trying to mess with him, or play my stupid games. My stubborn nature had nothing to do with it. The extent of my knowledge regarding relationships, both romantic and sexual, were shrouded with booze and pre-dawn getaways. How could I possibly know?
Killer's fingers curled tight into the material of the couch either side of me before one of his hands lifted and covered my eyes. A few strange sounds followed, but then I felt the cool surface of his helmet against my arm.
"Then...let's find out..."
The weakest of whimpers crept out of my throat when I felt Killer's lips against mine. They were warm, and a little rough in texture, but his delivery was as gentle as humanly possible.
His breath, now clear of the mask that always hid his features, fanned hot across my face as he lead the kiss, without the aggression of tongue. The hand he kept over my eyes trembled slightly, but it was nowhere near as tense as my entire body.
There was so much he was revealing to me with the lock of his lips. I was no longer clueless to how he had been feeling, and I would have been lying to myself if I had said there wasn't at least something there.
It felt like an eternity, but finally the man pulled back, and the cold surface of his helmet abandoned my skin. Moments later, he returned my sight to me, sitting back on his heels and watching me for whatever reaction I may have.
"S..So...now do you know..?" His voice was taut, and I could see how his shoulders tried to remain still as stone, grounding him so he wouldn't show any kind of, well, anything. He was good at that.
I...think I...
Swallowing thick, I slowly sat myself up, ankles together as I slid them out from beneath Killer and to the floor. My fingers flexed against my own knees before I nodded once, cautiously, and stood up.
"I...think I should go find Kid..."
I have to.
I walked only four paces towards the door before I backtracked, stopping before Killer, who hadn't moved, to place a hand on his shoulder.
"If that was...sincere...I want you to know that if things were different...I would've had a different answer just now..."
Killer sighed and reached to pat the hand I had on his shoulder, motioning his head to the door.
"Get a move on. Last I saw he was on the roof."
Guilt was definitely one of the many things I was feeling at that point, but I knew what I had to do. The smile I offered Killer was a hybrid of sad and thankful before I turned and rushed out of the room, my shadow chasing me against the honeyed light of sundown that painted the walls.
Yeah, I know now...I definitely know...
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***BONUS KILLER POV***
Once the door shut behind (Y/N) I allowed myself to fall backwards, uncaring of how the hard arm of the couch smacked into the back of my neck.
Lifting my head slightly, my fingers curled into the holes of my helmet, and I pulled it off so I could run a hand down my face.
Kissing her had been exactly I had imagined it would be. Soft, sweet, something I had never really known before those few short moments.
It had been a vile, greedy act on my account, even though my initial plan had been to prove a point to her. I never stood a chance, and I had known that from the very beginning.
I knew there was no need to send myself into a panic. The fact she had retraced her steps back to me, to reassure me that she held no hard feelings, was enough to let me know that i wouldn't lose her as I knew her now.
Still, what had I done to myself? Going in to that idiotic plan, I didn't doubt she would realise her true feelings for Kid and run to his arms, but now I had gotten a taste. I had to live with that one, bitter-sweet moment for the rest of my life.
Groaning under my breath, I gave the bridge of my nose a good, hard pinch before putting my helmet back on, rolling so the holes were covered by the back of the couch I would likely lay upon for the remainder of the evening.
"You better not fuck this up Kid...cuz that's the last time I'm gonna be able to control myself for you..."
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*** :)
Next Time: Ultra-Violence***