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Trigger warning: Implied rape and cursing. Do not read if you aren't comfortable with those themes.
His nose twitched and his eyes moved under his eyelids. He growled and jumped on his feet searching for what was wrong. He looked at the tears that were still streaming down my cheeks and whined resting his head on my forehead. I encircled him with my arms, still shaking.
****
"What is going on, Lyra?"
"Don't even try. You were the one having a nightmare. Don't deny it, I could feel it. You were scared and I felt scared. You wouldn't wake up."
"I was so preoccupied by protecting you that I forgot that I could be a target as well. The person that made your nightmare made me one too. You had the right reflex, sweetheart. I felt your fear and was able to shrug off the nightmare."
"Show me the nightmare."
"No, Lyra. I don't want you to have to see that. It was... sigh... it was horrible, even for me."
"I was raped and tortured for 3 months. I can handle horrible."
"Lyra, you can't see a man in a painting without freaking out. I don't want to show it to you for a reason. I just want to protect you from this."
"What if I want to protect you? How can I prevent something that scared you so bad if I don't know what it is?"
He looked in my eyes. I could see the dilemma he was facing. He wanted to protect me but he knew that I wouldn't back down either. I needed to protect him. I didn't know why, it was instinctive.
"Remember your grandmother telling you that you are more Alpha than Omega? And how your soul-mate would be the opposite? I feel the need to protect you because I think you're in danger. If I don't act on this instinct, I won't be able to think of anything else. I think I might actually go crazy knowing that you are in danger and that I don't know the source of that danger. Rilos, you need to trust me on this one. I need to know. You can't shield me forever."
A tear escaped from his eye and I caught it with my thumb. I rested my forehead on his.
"Show me."
****
It was dark. I could feel something around my neck, but I couldn't touch it because my hands were bound behind my back. I tried to free myself. The bonds were too strong. I lifted my head and my body froze. I saw myself tied up to the ceiling. I was watching this from Rilos' point of view. I heard someone approach and appear in my sight. Rilos growled, it was Sadist.
"How did you get out of jail?"
"My dad has allies that believe you imprisoned him because you don't like him. They freed us. Now, how does it feel to be powerless?"
"Let her go, this is between you and me. She's innocent."
"You really think she is? Didn't she tell you what happened here?"
He turned around to face me. He lifted my head with his finger.
"So, Rishka, you didn't tell him what happened?"
He slapped me.
"That's why I'm in prison, because you didn't tell the truth. What a little slut, you are.
He went behind me and looked Rilos in the eyes.
"She brought this to herself. Why don't you tell him how you were dressed when you were training? Short shorts and a crop top. You wanted to get raped, didn't you?"
"It's not true, I wasn't dressed like that. I didn't want to get raped, nobody does."
"You were born abnormal, why would you be like everyone else? You like it rough, that's why I used those instruments, but Rilos misunderstood didn't he? He thought I was beating you for fun. You deserved that punishment, didn't you?"
"No, I hadn't done anything wrong."
"Look at you, lying again. I'll have to punish you for that. Your soul-mate will watch. Is he really your soul-mate, though? You haven't done anything with him. Is it because you know he won't be able to satisfy you? You are such a slut, Rishka."
"You're wrong!"
I started crying. He ripped my clothes off.
"Stop it! Please!"
"Don't you dare touch her!"
"What are you going to do? Scream at me? That has never stopped me before. She'll start to like it in a minute, don't worry."
"No! Please!"
"I'll do anything, don't hurt her!"
"I don't care about you, I just enjoy seeing her in pain."
"Rilos, help me! I don't want this, not again! I'm sorry! I won't lie again!"
He started and I saw myself break. Tears were streaming down my face, but no sound could be heard coming from me. Rilos was struggling against the chains and I felt the pain of his arms breaking. He was screaming, not from his pain, but from mine. My vision blurred.
I opened my eyes and I felt tears falling from my eyes and on my face. Rilos was hovering over me, crying. I threw my arms around his neck and started crying harder.
****
"I didn't want you to relive that."
"Everything he said was a lie. I trained in baggy clothes and I never enjoyed what he did to me."
"I know, sweetheart, I know. You wouldn't be traumatized if you had liked that. I knew this wasn't happening, but it seemed so realistic that I didn't think to wake up. I wanted to save you, but when I felt the real you calling, I woke up. I'm sorry I couldn't save you."
"You did save me. I'm here and he can't get to me, ever."
"How can I protect you if I couldn't even protect myself from a nightmare? If something happened to you, I don't think I would recover."
"You were protecting me. That's why you had the nightmare. You have every power in you. Use them to find who did that to us and imprison that person."
"I'm lucky to have you."
"We are lucky to have each other."
"Let's go back to sleep, okay? We both have a long day tomorrow."
"I do? Do I have other things to learn from Ylna?"
"No, but I'll ask Satie to teach you things that you should have learned in school."
"Really?"
"Yes, now sleep, Lyra. I'll watch over you."
"Good night, Rilos."
****