classes pass, and now it's lunch time. he has not looked at me once. i'm in the worst mood. i'm by my locker, which is right at the end of the hallway. it's quiet up this end of the hall, and i can hear the voices and laughter of all the students further down. i'm collecting my things from my locker, when i feel a presence behind me. instantly, i get this horrible feeling.
"chaewon?" says a quiet, breathy voice from behind me. i sense his height, his strength, and the sneakiness laced into his words.
my shoulders tense slightly, and i sort of freeze, not wanting to face him. so much has happened recently, but it's not as though i'm just going to forget how he treated me at the bonfire party.
"chaewon." beomgyu says again. "can i just say something to you." he says.
last time beomgyu approached me in the hallway, yeonjun came to the rescue. i don't think yeonjun is going to come along this time.
"chaewon, please." he sighs.
eventually i turn to him, looking at him impatiently with hurt in my eyes. he's a tall guy, but i'm not going to let him make me feel small-
"what?" i sigh, holding my books to my chest.
he pauses, his eyes traveling my face. "okay, i know this seems like ages ago so you probably don't want me to bring it up." he says. "i tried to apologise but yeonjun..." he drifts off, careful not to say anything bad about him. "look, i was drunk, and-"
"are you making excuses?" i ask him.
"no, i just- look, i'm not like that, okay? i don't make out with girls at party's and start touching them up behind cabins-" he's saying, but instantly his words make me feel uncomfortable and vulnerable. i turn my head down the hall, making sure no one is in a close enough range to have heard that, but at the same time, i want someone to intervene. i want him to go.
"i know that's a sick thing to do, and i know it was wrong. i'm sorry, okay? trust me - i'm not like that most of the time." he says.
i look back to him. "oh, so just sometimes. well that's okay then." i say sarcastically.
"fucks sake." he swings his head back in frustration.
"excuse me?" i say.
"sorry, it's not you, i just- i'm shit with words." he says. "and i fucked up that night. i treated you like trash and i lost all my friends because of it." he says, and for a second, i feel ever so slightly sorry for him. "and after everything that has happened, with the video and stuff, i don't want you to hate me." he says.
i frown slightly. "the video?" i say, not seeing how that's at all relevant. "so you just want to make amends with me because i've suddenly gone viral?" i say.
his eyes widen slightly when i say that.
this dickhead.
"you know, for a second i felt sorry for you." i say to him, turning back to my locker and closing it. i start heading down the hallway, but he whips me around by the shoulder, turning my back to everyone.
"don't handle me like that." i say, but my voice has gone quiet.
"that's not what i meant." he says. "it's not because of the video, i just- i mean- i don't-"
"why are you trying to make amends with me, beomgyu?" i ask him. "we're not close, it's not as though we care about each other, i'll be gone in two weeks, so why are you suddenly making an effort with me?" i ask him.
he pauses in thought, clearly not having a clue how to respond to that. we both know exactly what he's doing.
"is it just because you want to get in on all of the sudden popularity i got from that video?" i ask him. "look, i don't want it, you can take it, but don't for a second think that i believe any of your apologies." i say to him. "you make me sick." i say, trying to walk away again.
"hey." he snaps quietly, grabbing hold on my wrist and pulling me back to him. that hurts. "look, i've apologised, don't be a bitch about it."
i look from my wrist and back up to his face which has turned urgent and bitter. what a complete dickhead. "who the hell do you think you are?" i say to him, feeling his strong hand clenched tightly around my puny little wrist. still hurts. really hurts.
he speaks quietly but harshly, standing close to me so that no one else hears. with him standing so close, i feel unimaginably small. "ever since that night, rumours spread and everyone is treating me like i'm this twisted predator or something. you've completely fucked up my reputation-"
"me? i fucked up your reputation?" i say, honestly unable to comprehend what he's saying. "are you that delusional? do you actually believe that?" i say.
"yes i believe that. i know that. none of this would have happened if it wasn't for you." he said. "yeonjun, one of my closest friends, beat the shit out of me because of you, and turned everyone against me. my life has gone to shit because of you." he says.
i stare up at this unbelievable guy. "how can you be so blind?" i say to him. "you were the one who did that to me, so you were the one who suffered consequences." i say. "now you just want to play the innocent and get me to publicly announce to the world that you're not the twisted predator everyone says you are, because all you care about is your stupid reputation?" i say, staring at him with disgust. "there's no way in hell i'm going to take the blame for what you did to me and fix your fucking reputation. you can do that on your own."
"oh come on, things happen, people move on." he sighs, rolling his eyes. "just get over it and make the damn video."
i just stand in shock. what the actual fuck? my heart is thudding with anger.
"let go of my wrist." i say to him.
"no, chaewon- you don't understand." he says, his grip tightening even more. how is that possible? the pain is becoming unbearable, it feels as though the bone is about to snap. "my life has been flipped upside down because of that night, you've got to fix it-"
"let go of me." i say again, blocking out his words. all i can think about is the pain flaring up my arm.
"not until you agree to-"
"beomgyu, let go." i say again, with a slight wobble in my voice.
"no, first, promise me that you'll-"
"let go of me!" i finally scream, and the entire hallway goes silent.
he releases my wrist harshly, and i stand frozen for a second, breathing deeply. i sense everyone's eyes behind me, but i don't turn to face anyone. i stare at beomgyu, who stares at me.
"you're a bitch." he says simply with a scoff before walking past me, disappearing into the silent crowd behind me.
i just stand frozen, my chest rising and falling. i look down to my wrist, seeing the dark red imprints of his fingers. it hurst like hell. people start to whisper behind me, and quiet voices begin to arise again.
"chaewon." daeun says, appearing from behind me, her hand on my back. "what just happened?" she asks with a concerned expression. then she glances down to my wrist, eyes widening. "did he do that to you?"
i feel the presence of more people, and i'm surrounded by kendall, landon, jayden, liv and taehyun.
"hey, what happened?" landon asks me.
"what did he do?" kendall asks.
"did he do that?" jayden looks down at my wrist.
"what just happened?" taehyun asks.
wow. overwhelming. okay, let's string some words together, chaewon, it's not rocket science. "he's acting as if it's all my fault." i say quietly.
"what is your fault?" kendall asks.
"what he did to me at the bonfire." i say.
"what?" taehyun scoffs.
"what did he say?" daeun asks me.
"because the video went viral and i have loads of followers, he wants me to make a video to fix his reputation so people quit calling him a twisted predator or something." i say, still unable to believe it.
"he wants you to what?" liv says. "nah, where did he go? imma slap that dick so hard-" she starts saying.
"no, please." i say.
"what?" she says to me.
"don't. i'm sick of the drama." i say.
"but you don't deserve this. not him, not elena-"
"elena?" taehyun asks. "what has happened with elena?"
"she's blackmailing them." liv says, and i instantly give her a look, begging her not to say anything else.
"what?" kendall asks, and everyone is just really confused.
"liv-" i say quietly.
"elena caught yeonjun making out with her last night and is blackmailing them." liv says. "if they don't do what she wants then she's telling the school, and chaewon will be sent home." liv says to them all.
my eyes widen. what the hell? no one else can know about yeonjun and i!
instantly there are a load of voices at once, not knowing what to address.
"you guys made out?!"
"when did that happen?"
"oh my god!"
"wait, why would you get sent home?"
"you're leaving?"
"what is she making you do?"
"how is she blackmailing you?"
i just look at liv. why did she say that to everyone? i can't trust anybody, can i? she reads my expression and sighs before speaking.
"girl, trust me. we're all friends, none of us are gonna rat you guys out. right?" she looks to the others.
"yeah, promise!" kendall says.
"we won't tell." taehyun says.
"promise." landon says and jayden nods along.
i look to daeun, who's staring at me puzzled. "sorry, can we just...talk for a sec?" she says to me quietly.
i hesitantly follow her away from the group a few steps and then turns to me. "why didn't you tell me?" she asks me.
i sigh slightly, feeling guilty. "i would have, but-"
"you told liv, who you've just met, but not your best friend?" she asks, feeling hurt.
"daeun, i was going to tell you." i say. "she found me right after it all went down so i just kind of spilt it all to her." i explain. "i would have told you, daeun. of course i would have. you're my best friend. i'm sorry." i say to her.
she looks at me, her face softening, knowing she can't stay mad at me. "you're and idiot, you know that?" she says to me.
"i know that." i say, and she smiles slightly.