when we got home, yeonjun goes straight upstairs, quickly. i watch him from the bottom of the stairs as everyone enters the house. jae runs over, jumping about at our feet.
"don't worry, sweetheart." siwoo says, putting her hand on my shoulder. "he can be like this sometimes. it's nothing to stir over." she says, smiling at me. "right, i'm just going to take jae out, be back soon. she says collectively to all of us.
jihye goes to the living room and flops onto it immediately. the walking has been a lot for her little legs today. sehun walks into his office, and juwon steps closer to me.
"were you there?" he says quietly.
i look at him.
"when he goth the black eye." he says. he's noticed it too. brilliant.
oh god. if i give anything away, yeonjun will be in more trouble than he already is.
"i won't tell anyone, promise." he says.
"uh-" i start to say but am luckily interrupted when sehun calls juwon into the kitchen.
i pause, considering what to do with myself. even though he treats me like crap, i can't help my legs from wondering up the stairs and straight to yeonjun's bedroom.
i knock twice, before i slowly push his door open.
he looks up at me from where he's sat on the end of his bed.
i step inside.
"did i say come in?" he says.
i ignore him. i think i'm just coming to terms with the fact that he isn't a nice person. i sit on his bed beside him in silence, and he just sighs, accepting that i'm not going to leave. he kicks his shoes off before lying back on the bed.
"what are you going to say?" i ask him, referring to when his mom inevitably comes to talk with him about the black eye.
he shakes his head. "i don't know." he says.
i sit, staring at his ceiling. "is telling them the truth one of the options you're considering?" i ask him.
he scoffs, staring at his ceiling. "no. corse not." he says. "if my dad knew i took you to a party, he'd-" he says, stopping himself from getting worked up.
"is your mom an understanding person?" i ask him.
"she's a pushover. she's easy to manipulate." he says.
"well then, as long as your dad never finds out and you can get your mom to keep it to herself then it will be fine." i say, trying to be optimistic.
he shakes his head at the ceiling. "i'm already keeping secrets from him. there's no way this can turn out okay." he sighs.
i'm curious what secrets he's keeping, but i don't ask. he'd probably bite my head off if i did that.
"yeonjun." sehun says, suddenly opening the door without warning.
yeonjun sits up.
"a word." he says before walking off, expecting yeonjun to be following.
this isn't good. i thought siwoo would be the one talking with him. why is sehun talking with him.
yeonjun locks eyes with me, as if to say, 'i'm dead' before he gets up and walks out of the room.
i stay sat on his bed for a second, looking around his bedroom. i friend it strange how plain everything is. it's a nice room, don't get me wrong, but there's no character to it. you can't figure out what music he likes, what sports he plays, what hobbies he has, what books he reads, what shows he watches. it just makes him even harder to read.
i feel bad. i know it was yeonjun's idea to go to the party in the first place, but i went along with it. i ended up getting myself in that situation with beomgyu, which got yeonjun and him in a fight. that's how he got his black eye. because of me. i was an idiot for going off with someone that i barely knew.
feeling useless and hoping to distract myself, i end up going downstairs to the kitchen. i'm not sure where sehun and yeonjun have gone to talk, but i don't hear any shouting. when i reach the kitchen there's no one here except juwon, who's sat at the kitchen island with his head in between his hands.
"you okay?" i ask him.
he looks up at me. "my dad took my phone." he starts telling me. "he started looking at snapchat stories until he saw videos and pictures from the party last night." he says.
oh no, this can't be happening. that's why juwon was asking about the cinema - he knew we weren't actually there and that we were at a party. but he didn't tell on us. he kept it to himself and i like him more for doing that.
"he saw a video of you two dancing, he saw the alcohol, i tried to stop him - i really did." he says, scraping at his hair with his fingers.
"it's not your fault." i say, because it's not, but inside, i'm terrified. how is sehun going to react? is he going to be mad at me too? "where are they?" i ask.
"dad's office." he says. "you know you're fucked if he brings you to his office."
i bite my lip. this is all my fault.
then we hear the office door begin to open harshly, and an outburst of noise as if yeonjun tried to leave.
"no! don't you walk away from me!" sehun's low voice bellows.
yeonjun doesn't respond but i can just picture his eyes rolling.
"you've got to start taking responsibility for what you do, boy!" sehun shouts. "you've got to stop playing around!"
"it was just a party, it's not the end of the world-"
"no, you lied to your family!" he says. "she's not been here for one week and you're already getting her caught into all of the stupid shit you do! you're a bad influence on her!"
"well it's not my fault she's here, is it?" yeonjun says. "you're the one who signed me up for it in the first place."
what? i don't think they realise the door is still open.
"yes, because i'm so sick of you messing around! i thought that this would force you to quit doing all of your stupid shit and start being responsible because she's around! but instead you've just dragged her into it all!" sehun shouts.
"you thought that signing me up for an exchange would change who i am?" yeonjun asks.
"i hoped your eyes would open a bit, and you'd learn new things when you go to england, find a new passion, start acting like an adult!" sehun shouts.
so yeonjun never wanted me here. sehun only signed him up, to use me, to change his son. my heart is thumping, and i suddenly feel this horrible tug in my stomach.
"when will you just take me seriously!" yeonjun finally breaks into a shout.
"when you start acting seriously!" sehun shouts. "all of your stupid art and guitar playing and song writing and useless crap is for kids! grow up! get some brains, get a job, start being useful!" sehun shouts.
so yeonjun is a creative person? usually people into art and music have the most insanely decorated rooms. is that why it's so plain in there? because his dad doesn't accept his passions?
"i did have a job!" yeonjun shouts. "you made me quit!"
"because it's a child's job! you're worthless, you should be earning money through working hard for it!"
"you don't think that selling art and doing houses is hard work?" yeonjun shouts. "you need more skill to do that than all of your stupid computer, boring ass-"
"do not disrespect me, boy!" sehun interrupts. "you're so difficult! why can't you just be more like juwon?"
"when will you stop comparing me to my little brother! we're different people!"
"because he focuses on his school work and is a skilled soccer player - if he carries on he way he is, he'll be set for life! he's the better one! you just embarrass me!"
my lips part. did he just say that he prefers juwon over him? i thought that parents love all of their children equally, no matter what. this man is horrible. he calls yeonjun useless, worthless, embarrassing, he tells him his brother is the better child.
juwon and i just look at each other, both of us too curious to not listen to their argument, no matter how guilty i feel for doing it.
i'm learning so much. i remember siwoo said how yeonjun did up the house when i first arrived here. and she asked yeonjun to show me his art but he said he got rid of it, probably because his dad made him. his dad doesn't approve of his passions so is just being plain horrible to him. he's trying to control his life.
yeonjun just goes silent. how do you respond to that? what parent calls their child worthless, useless and embarrassing? and says they prefer their other kid? he must feel crushed.
"i said don't you walk away from me!" sehun bellows.
the door slams and yeonjun appears from around the corner. with his head down, he walks away, heading straight for the front door.