As the night draws to a close, most of the guests have left. The servers and bartenders are slowly cleaning up while you're outside on the balcony.
Your eyes are drawn to the twinkling stars in the sky as you lean your arms against the glass railing. Despite the light pollution coming from the city, the stars seem a bit brighter today.
In an attempt to distract your mind, you look for the pole star and attempt to make out some of the constellations.
The cold breeze blows across your skirt and bare arms, though you're not even remotely cold. Cold has never really bothered you before.
Due to your ice magic, you keep yourself from freezing in cold weather, and in summer, you use it to keep cool.
Even though you are doing your best to distract yourself, you find that you are still thinking about Loki.
Your fight with him still bothers you, and you're angry with yourself for letting your mind linger on it.
You're just annoyed that you allowed him in as the man has many red flags.
On top of that, you had a feeling that you were going to get hurt, but you somehow ignored your intuition completely.
Again.
That's twice in a very short amount of time.
How did this happen?
As your mind spirals further and further, you are reminded of why you didn't do love to begin with.
Over the years, many people have broken your trust, and it seems Loki is no different.
Five centuries ago, you finally embraced the fact that you didn't age like everyone else and that that wasn't going to change. After that, you were able to finally live your life to the fullest, and that meant you opened yourself up to making friends and forming relationships.
You ended up meeting a stable boy named Henry, whom you thought was your soulmate and eventually captured your heart. Both of you felt like you understood each other, though you never told him about your actual age. That seemed like a conversation for another time.
As his interests were the same as yours, everything worked out well. He wasn't the kind of man to force you to do household chores, though it was expected of a woman. Instead, you shared that duty while you helped him with the Duke's horses. Though, you were never allowed to ride them.
It seemed like everything was working perfectly between you two, but your instincts told you something was off about this man.
As if he was too good to be true.
He was.
One day, your neighbor learned that his wife was expecting, though he knew that the child wasn't his own. The man had been travelling far in order to tend to his sister, who was gravely ill. He spent months traveling to the south of Spain by horse and carriage.
When he confronted his wife, she confessed to her husband. She told him she wanted a child so she was less lonely during his travels and that he failed to give her one. She then admitted that she had shared moments with Henry and begged her husband for forgiveness.
Instead of responding to his wife's plea, he grabbed his shotgun and headed straight for Henry.
He pointed his gun at Henry as he opened the front door, forced him to come outside and face him in front of the entire village. Afraid and upset, you asked your neighbor what had happened.
The neighbor explained and asked Henry what he had to say for himself, and Henry laughed. There was no denial on his part. Rather, he confessed to the neighbor's wife that he loved her from the first moment he saw her. He also told her that his relationship with you was only so he could stay close to her as you owned the house next to theirs.
With his shotgun pointed at Henry, the man asked you what punishment Henry should receive.
No longer caring about the fate of the man you loved so dearly, you answered: "Do with him what you will."
Leaving Henry behind, you walked back inside to pack up your possessions. When you retrieved your baby blanket from a box hidden in your wardrobe, a gunshot sounded throughout the entire village.
Your final words were, "Good riddance."
You left the village and never returned.
This was the day when your idea of a perfect relationship came crashing down. As a result, you closed your heart and refused to allow anyone else in ever again.
For centuries, it remained that way.
Until Loki came along and changed everything.
Suddenly, love seemed less complicated, less fleeting.
Even though Loki is a prince and you are a mere commoner, he is just like you: Someone who has not been handed things on a silver platter, has struggled and fought for the things they wanted.
Despite your very different lives, you felt an immediate connection with him.
With Loki, trust came very easily. As if somehow you were destined to meet. Though, you know how ridiculous that sounds as you don't believe in destiny.
Suddenly, quietness fills your mind as you sense a presence lurking behind you. Though you hear no sound, the tall figure is moving closer. With one quick movement, you unsheathe the dagger from your thigh, turn around, and thrust it firmly against the neck of your target.
"Darling, it's me! Lower your weapon." Loki exclaims. "I came to speak with you."
His hands are raised, shocked by the blade resting against his neck. You stare into his eyes and curl your lips as you slowly lower the blade.
"I am not your 'darling' and I don't want to speak with you, do you understand? Or is that too complicated for your self-centered God brain?" You snarl as you pull the slit of your dress aside and sheathe the dagger. "Just leave."
"I will not be leaving. I need to explain myself." Taking a few steps closer, Loki says, "I need you to listen to me. Please, Da ... Nova, I beg of you."
"There is nothing left to say. You have made yourself quite clear ... almost crystal clear."
"Darling, you don't understand..." He starts as he places his hand on your shoulder.
Your forehead creases as you shrug his hand off your shoulder. "Do NOT call me darling! You have no right to call me that!" You shout at him as you turn away from him.
"Nova, I sent her away. She means nothing to me. All I care about is you." He grips your hand and pulls you back, making you turn back toward him.
"Whatever you do in your bedroom is not my business, remember? If you want to spend your days in there fucking that blonde whore, then that's your decision. Don't mind me! But don't expect me to stick around until you might have use of me again." You look him straight in the eyes, your blue eyes tearing up and staring intently into his emerald ones as you pull your hand from his.
"Nova, please, listen to me." Loki grabs both your hands this time and pulls you closer. You attempt to pull away but he has a very tight grip on your hands this time.
"Loki, let me go." You try to pull away from him, but he tightens his grip, causing you to wince.
"No, I need you to hear me out!" He begs.
"You are hurting me! Let go of me!" You whimper, your eyes filling even more with tears.
Noticing his grip is too tight, he quickly releases your hands.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..."
That's your problem, Loki. You never mean to, but you do it anyway. You don't realize how much you hurt the people who care about you, both physically and mentally. And god forbid, if they do find a way to get close to you, you push them away and treat them like absolute trash." Tears roll down your cheeks in frustration.
As tears now gather in his own eyes, Loki sighs softly. "Nova, I care about you. More than you could ever realize." He drops his head and rubs his forehead.
"You ... care about me?" Loki looks up at you and nods with a half smile.
Confusion stirs within you, but you remain silent, eager for him to continue.
"You've intrigued me since the day you froze Thor and I at the top of Stark's hideous tower. Even though you know the kind of man that I am, you gave me a second chance, no questions asked. Your presence vexed me, but your unending kindness softened me. I feel things I haven't felt in a very long time and that terrifies me immensely as it didn't end well for me the previous time." Loki stares into your intense gaze focused on his words, inching closer as he speaks.
"All I've wanted to do since you came into my life, is protect you. Before Thor and I left for Asgard, well, we shared an amazing night and it was impossible for me not to think about you the entire time we were there." Loki gently grabs your hands and caresses them.
You let out a deep sigh and take a moment to process his words, until a thought enters your mind.
"The blonde ... Did you sleep with her?" The thought of Loki touching her sends shivers down your spine.
Loki takes a moment to find his words.
"There was an attempt. All I wanted to do was forget about you. But I couldn't as I couldn't stop thinking about you. So, the honest answer, almost, but no, I did not." You can see the pain in his eyes as he explains. You can tell that he feels ashamed of the actions he took and the foolishness he committed.
Loki looks up at you and he can see that you doubt his words.
"I could show you, if you'd like?" Loki says as he pushes on your mental barrier. Not knowing if you want to see any of it, you fight him for a moment before giving in. You have to know.
You lower your mental barrier and allow Loki to create a link with you.
Immediately feel pain.
Sorrow.
An overwhelming sense of sadness.
Shame.
Guilt floods your mind.
You feel his anger and defeat during your first meeting.
"Nice try, mortal. But you cannot kill a God."
The wonder and attraction that led up to your first kiss.
"Kiss me."
Overwhelming lust and desire when you spent the night together.
"You squirm so nicely for me, pet."
"Oh Loki, please don't stop! You are about to make me come!"
How lonely he felt in Asgard and how he missed you.
"You seem to care for her very much."
"I do. She allows me to be my true self without judgement."
Then your heart sinks into your stomach ...
The terror that rushed through his body when he found you in between the rubble at the HYDRA base.
You watch as Loki grabs your unconscious body and pulls you into his lap, sobbing as he asks for help.
"I ... she needs assistance. Nova..."
A battle of emotions and strong feelings for a non-human Midgardian woman forced him to give in to what he had avoided for so long.
Back at the compound, Loki is in his room surrounded by a bunch of Asgardian wine and ale. Suddenly, the blonde exits the bathroom.
You watch as she attempts to seduce Loki and you cringe as she touches his bare chest. You want to pull away but you power through and keep watching what Loki's showing you. You need to know.
She kisses him and he reluctantly kisses her back while she takes control and throws him onto the bed. She crawls on top of him, kissing and fondling his crotch but he doesn't seem to get hard, no matter what she does.
You watch as he explains to the blonde that he can't do this and that his heart belongs to another woman.
The blonde seemed quite understanding.
"I am also an actress. So, if you want me to, I can pretend to be your new girlfriend? Make her jealous?" she asks.
"I highly doubt that that would still work."
"We can always try. Love is worth a shot, Loki."
A relieved whimper escapes you as tears run down your cheeks.
"I may be the God of Mischief and Lies, but I promise I didn't lie to you, darling." Loki closes the link and pulls his energy back. You open your eyes and Loki gives you a moment to ponder what you just saw.
"Why did you yell at me down in the medical bay?" you finally ask.
"I thought I had lost you and I could not bear that loss. We Gods live for several millennia, but the woman I grew so fond of nearly gave her life to save others. You left me utterly powerless for the first time in my life." Loki raises his hand to stroke your cheek with his thumb. "What use is being a god when you can't protect the ones you care for so much that it hurts? So, I did what I do best and pushed you away. I have lost too many things in my life. This would have broken me completely." He sobs.
"If you had lost me, you would have found a way to move on, I'm sure." You say dismissively, remembering Loki's history with women.
"No, darling. That would have been the end of me."
"Oh Loki, don't say that." You grab his cheeks with both hands and pull his face closer so your forehead touches his. "You would hurt the people who love you."
"You nearly died in my arms. There would be no coming back from that. Not after I've opened my heart to you." Loki wraps his arms around you and pulls you in close as his tears continue to flow.
You keep quiet for a minute, basking in his embrace as you let out a deep sigh.
Loki laid himself bare right in front of you. He chose to be vulnerable, showing all his cards as you're sure he hasn't done many times.
You lift your head off his chest and look him straight in the eyes.
That's when you finally feel all the tension from the last few weeks ebb from your shoulders. Not waiting a moment longer, you press your lips against his in a loving and passionate kiss. Loki wraps his arms around you, grabbing a tight hold on you.
An explosion of emotions breaks free after weeks and weeks of desire. Desire to be held and longing to be kissed again by his lips. For the briefest of moments, his lips are yours again and yours are his as you bask into the feeling of a thousand butterflies fluttering in your stomach once again.
Your lips break and a smile adorns his lips as your thumb caresses his cheeks. You gaze into his eyes and let out a small nervous giggle.
"Does this mean you'll forgive me?" Loki asks carefully.
"It's a good start." You chuckle. "But I am still expecting a chocolate muffin."
"You are absolutely right! " Loki chuckles and grabs a hold of your hand, trying hard not to stare for too long. You can tell that Loki approves of your look. "Aren't you cold, darling?"
"Not at all."
Being the gentleman that he is, Loki shrugs off his suit coat and wraps it around your shoulders, rubbing his hands up and down your arms. You expected the coat to carry some of his warmth, but it doesn't, though you do get a whiff of his cologne.
"So, now what?" You ask, and Loki looks up and down at you, not letting go of your hand as he takes a few steps backwards to admire you.
"Now, I would love to dance with this beautiful maiden, clad in my signature colors. It would be incredibly rude of me not to." He twirls you around, making you giggle.
The band is still playing and the balcony door has been left open ever so slightly which allows you to hear the music outside. Loki spins you around and grabs your waist as he leads a slow dance. You put your head down on Loki's shoulder and let out a soft sigh.
"The song you sang was breathtaking, darling. You have a voice like a siren. I was completely captivated." You lift your head and your gaze meets his.
"You think so?" you ask sheepishly.
"Of course, I would request you to sing more often if it didn't make you so incredibly sad." Loki looks into your eyes and smiles softly.
"Singing doesn't usually make me sad, just this time." A giggle escapes your lips. "But I don't have a reason to be sad anymore."
"Good." Loki stops the dance and holds out his arm. You eagerly grab onto his arm and follow him as he leads you back inside where your fellow Avengers seemed to be eavesdropping but pretending they weren't.
"Kissed and made up?" Steve smirks.
"Yes we did." Loki kisses you on the head, embracing you tenderly.
"So, when did this happen?" Tony approaches and gestures to the two of you holding hands.
"Oh, leave the love birds alone Tony." Nat nudges him.
"Fine." Tony rolls his eyes as he takes a sip from his glass.
"We do need to talk about this at some point, Nova." You nod at Nat and smile, happy that she isn't freaking out about this.
"Now we know we need to have a karaoke night or something. I mean, we knew Nat could sing but the voice on you Nova, wow!" Steve says as the rest mumble in agreement with him.
"Sure, but make sure there's enough alcohol to help convince me next time." You say as the rest laugh along.
"Well, I'm off to bed now, it's getting late." While he gets up, Steve sets his glass down on the table.
"Good night everyone." Steve says as the rest of them begin to get up and head to bed as well.
"I'm heading to bed as well." You say as you face Loki.
"Let me escort you to your chambers." Loki entwined his fingers with yours as you walked back up the stairs to your room. You turn to Loki as you approach your bedroom door.
"You look absolutely ravishing in that dress. I feel absolutely blessed to be allowed to gaze upon your beauty." With a smile, he pulls you in for one last passionate kiss.
"Good night, my darling." Loki kisses your hand before slowly stepping away to his own room.
"Good night, Loki." A smile spreads across your face as you enter your bedroom.
You sit down on your bed and unbuckle the straps on your high-heeled sandals, kicking them off with a sigh of relief. Beautiful as they are, those shoes are a pain to walk in.
After searching for clean pajamas, you put the dagger and holster back where they belong and place the shoes back on the shoe rack. You hate the idea of taking off your dress but you're also eager to slip into your pajamas and head to bed. It's been a long night.
The first thing you notice as you enter your bathroom is a red rose with a note attached to the stem.
'I present you with this Midgardian peace offering, hoping you'll accept my sincere apologies. Happy dreams, my darling.
- Loki'.
You bring the rose to your nose and smell it, sighing happily. You look at yourself in the mirror one final time before taking off the dress and wiping away the makeup.
~~~~~~
Snow crackles under your bare feet and a luxurious white gown flows against your legs. Your long raven hair is covered with tiny snowflakes as the wind plays with your hair.
The cavernous vale you find yourself in is surrounded by vast and jagged blue mountains. Though the vale is covered in snow, it is entirely barren. Not a single animal, tree or house can be found here. All you see is snow and mountains and all you can hear is the whistling of the wind past your ears.
You walk endlessly in the same direction, not knowing where your feet are taking you. Everything within you tells you that you should go home, but you can sense something.
Someone.
Someone ... familiar?
"Where am I?" you wonder out loud. "What is this place?"
The wind picks up the snow and obscures your vision, encircling you for a moment until both the wind and snow settle when the sun pushes through the clouds.
Suddenly, a figure clad in gold and black appears a distance away from you. You slowly approach the figure and you start noticing small details. Blonde hair, golden gown, crown on her head and arms wide open as if ready to embrace you.
You stop a few steps away from her and gaze at her luscious gown. She must be royalty as no commoner could possibly afford an elaborate gown like that.
"Who are you?" you ask bluntly.
The woman responds and you can see her lips move, but you hear no sound.
~~~~~~
Loki stirs, feeling a nippy breeze flow into his bedroom. He sits upright, looking around the room and notices that his window is closed.
Thinking he had imagined it, he lays back down, ready to return to sleep. However, a heavy, demanding breeze flows through his entire bedroom and rustles the sheets and curtains.
Curious, Loki gets out of bed and ventures toward the wind and into the hallway. Trying to feel where the breeze is coming from, Loki spots your door open, the wood covered in a shiny layer of ice.
A sudden wave of anxiety flows through his veins as he pushes your bedroom door open and sees you lying asleep in your bed. Your windows are blown wide open. Snow and ice cover the bedroom floor and bedding.
"Nova?" Loki yells urgently as he rushes to the windows to close them. But you don't react.
~~~~~~
"I ... I can't hear you! Who are you?" You ask the woman once again.
Once again you see her lips move but no sound escapes.
"What do you want from me?"
You keep watching as the woman gets more and more confused and attempts to speak with you.
"Nova!" You can hear Loki's voice yelling for you.
"Loki? What's going on? Where are you?" You yell and look around but you don't see him. It's still just you and the lady in gold.
"Nova, wake up!" Loki voice echoes through the vale once again. The breeze picks up again, and the lady in gold slowly fades from your sight as flurry starts to surround you once more and pulls you from the vale.
"Wait! Where are you going?" You yell at her but everything fades to black instead.
~~~~~~
"Nova!"
Your eyes flutter open and you see a heaving Loki sitting next to you on his knees onto the bed. There is ice covering the walls, ceiling, floors and furniture but it seems to defrost and disappear on its own.
"Loki? What's going on?" You ask sleepily as you rub your eyes.
"Darling, are you alright?" He asks and you get more and more confused.
"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?"
"Darling, the room was covered in ice."
"Wait, how? Where did it go?" You push yourself up and look around the room, noticing it was just as you'd left it last night.
"It disappeared." He shakes his head, "Were you using magic in your sleep? Did you dream?"
You think for a moment, remembering the lady in gold and the snow-covered vale surrounded by towering mountains.
"I guess I did? I was walking in the snowy mountains when a woman in gold appeared in front of me."
"A woman in gold?" Loki asks, raising an eyebrow.
"It's ... not important." You sigh, thinking you're just going mad.
"We will look into this some other time then." Loki says as he heads back to your door. "For now, try to get some sleep darling."
"Wait!" You yell before he closes the door. "Will you stay with me?"
Loki looks at you skeptically for a moment before reentering your room and closing the door behind him. "Of course. Anything for you."
He crawls into the bed next to you and you immediately crawl closer to him, wrapping your arms around his mid and resting your head onto his chest as you slowly drift back to sleep.
~~~~~~
The next morning, you wake up to the smell of coffee filling your nose. Getting out of bed, you pass your desk and notice a cup of coffee sitting on top, joined by a little note. You raise the mug to your lips and blow softly as you grab the note and read.
'A coffee for a good start of your day.
- Loki.'
You smile and head into the closet with your cup, looking for an outfit to wear. You opt for simple blue jeans with a navy shirt and navy sneakers. Now fully dressed, you head back to your bedroom when you hear a knock on the door. When opening the door, you see both Thor and Loki waiting.
"Hey guys, what's up?" You allow them to come inside and gesture for them to take a seat on the couch as you close the door.
"Darling, we have to talk to you about something." Loki starts as you sit down next to him. He leans in and places a soft kiss on your cheek, making you blush ever so slightly.
"Sounds serious." You look at both of them, one eyebrow raised.
"We have a suspicion of who you actually are." Loki begins.