blue
"hey, finneas took off a while ago. i stayed and played around with some vocals. i was about to check up on you, i wanted to say goodbye before i left." billie said when she heard the door unlock and lock again from the inside.
"that's fine. uhm... you can stay over as song as you want. i think i gonna go to sleep." i said with a raspy voice, trying to hide my face so she couldn't tell i've been crying.
"hey, what's up? you don't look well." she spoke softly as she stood up to pull me into her embrace. i almost immediately sinked in, burying my face into her neck and squeezing her tighter as she did the same. i just cried in her arms.
she ended spooning me to sleep, but right before i dozed off i asked her to stay over and she did.
-
three days later
"did you end up asking your grandma about death?" i stared at the ceiling as i laid on my bed.
"i did." he answered. "she ended up telling me a super cliché answer though. it was something like, as you grow older and experience the beautiful, majestic, ugly, stupid, frustrating, hopeful parts of life you begin to feel satisfied with what you have done, or what change you have done, it can be minor or big, but it matters. as you grow older you'll realize that it's just how life is, you are born from the womb, live an average of eighty years then die. simple."
"i don't know if that's beautiful or sad." i said, just above a whisper.
"can i ask you a question?" lucas asked, but i think i already have an idea of what it could be.
"we're you scared that you would die?"
"yes." i answered. "i was just a child, i wanted to live my life. i had still not had my first kiss, i hadn't tried having sex, alcohol, drugs. i didn't do anything illegal yet, i was scared of what would happen next. i was terrified i was never going to fall in love with a girl."
"i was terrified i would lose you. i tried to be strong for you, i didn't allow myself to shed a tear with you anywhere around, but i broke down almost every night and cry myself to sleep." he admitted.
"i love you." i pouted, a small little tear fell from the side of my eye and disappeared at my hairline.
"i hate you." he kissed my forehead.
we rarely talk about deep stuff and are rarely affectionate with each other, but when we are i try my best to not take those moments for granted and spoke them up as much as i can.
"did you talk to billie after that night?" he asked.
"no, i don't know how to start a conversation." i answered.
"maybe start with a hello." he made fun of me. "she doesn't know why you were crying in her arm right?"
"she doesn't, she just held me all night while i cried and left quietly in the morning after a vivid memory of a forehead kiss." i answered.
"you should just kiss already! i know you know that she knows that you like her and i know you know that she likes you! so stop fucking around and do something about it!" lucas said with a frustrated tone.
"i don't know if she likes me or not. what if i kiss her then she tells me it's not like that and things get weird between us? i don't want that!" i shook my head.
"i will not hesitate to set you on a blind date."
"don't even think about it, i will not hesitate to slash your throat."
"wow." he widened his eyes. "too far, too far. i could in vision my own death and the news headlines and everything."
"gay boy burtally murdered by lesbian best friend after blind date gone wrong." i said in a new reporter voice. "and the once you read the article, the last paragraph with be like: will this disease ever come to an end? when will it stop? where will they draw the line? are we even safe with them around?"
"it's disgusting, honestly." lucas said. "you don't want more lies on the internet, do you? so you can't kill me."
"oh i don't care anymore, i'll kill you if i want to."
"i don't feel safe in this relationship at all. i may have to report these death threats to the police."
"be my guest, i'm a rich white lady."
"yo"
"you sounded straight when you said that." i turned to him in shock.
"that was so uncalled for! what the fuck. take it back, take it back right now! this is my thirteenth reason, right here."
"sorry i don't have a bathtub, the shower will just have to do."
"i changed my mind then"
"too bad."
-
billayyy ❤️🔥
hey shorty
i'm taller than you 🤠
but go off ig
you are so not 🙄
how are you?
you doing okay?
yeah
i'm doing fine
you caught me on a bad day the other day
you are you tho?
we all have bad days
glad you're feeling better <3
i'm good too
wyd?
went to my parents house from finneas'
and no one is here 💔😔🤚
iM sO lOnLeY i HaVe No BoDy
PLEASE-
poor baby is home alone
it's scary and dark outside!
you're scared of the dark?
i still wake up in the middle of the night
wake up mom and sleep next her 👍
valid but confusing
anyways wyd?
i was practicing for an audition
it's tomorrow 😶🌫️
i wanna hear!
plus i'm sure you'll do great :)
thanks
you already know you can come over whenever
the studio is like monica's apartment from friends
if that's the case
then i'm gonna be over more than at mine's
it would be with great pleasure that
i'll be able to accompany you ;)
can you cook?
depends 🤷♀️
i can make a simple burritos
cook for me
i'm coming over.
okay joey
-
"okay so, i've been doing research for the last trip i'll take and it think i found it. but you have to approve of it too, cause you're also going to be on the rode with me." i said as i was washing the dishes.
"and.."
"and i wanna go visit a memory i can't seem to forget. i wanna find another ufo in joshua tree."
"a ufo?" billie starred at me. "i believe in aliens, so you can count me in baby."
"hell yeah." i smiled.
"so what's that memory you were talking about?" she asked.
"you'll know later." i answered. " when are you free?"
"this whole week-"
"aright! we're leaving tomorrow!" i clapped you hands.
"tomorrow?" billie frowned her brows, surprised by how soon it is.
"that's the fun of this, every decision is made with out thinking about it, plus the sooner we ride the sooner we are there the sooner we see a ufo." i explained.
"do you know where we're staying, at least?" she asked, nervously laughing while slightly shaking her head.
"yes! i've got everything figured out, you just pack a small bag and we'll be on our way."
"i don't know if i hate the impulsive side of you or i love it." she groaned.
"you love it." i groaned mockingly.