All around our estate, numerous busy bee workers were perfecting our home for the hundreds of mafia workers from around the globe that will be celebrating our triplet's birthday in the grand ballroom tonight.
All Smith parties go down in history for being over the top and dramatic. Thanks to my lavish wife and crazy father-in-law.
But everyone from the illegal and the legal side of the world KNEW that this party celebrating the big three of our littlest angels would put all our past parties to shame.
Which was why no one was surprised at the colorful choice of words that were coming out of my wife Reese Smith's mouth every few minutes.
She just wanted this day to go perfectly.
If only she truly knew what was in store for all of us, she would have locked everyone away and kept the triplets in hiding.
"Where is my baby," a familiar feminine voice was heard from the main hallway.
Walking towards the foyer I was met with the site of my gorgeous parents holding hands and my mother holding a pan of lasagna.
"I'm here ma,"
"Ugh not you idiot I'm talking about my little babies," my mother Martina scolded me with.
"Of course, he would think you were talking about him. We raised a selfish little bastard," my father Angelo muttered.
"I feel the love," I said while walking over to greet both of my parents with a bone crushing hug.
"No, but seriously, where are my bambinos?" my father all but yelled out.
As if the adorable triplets could hear their grandparents, the hallway was suddenly filled with the sound of little footsteps approaching.
"Nonna, nonno!" (grandma, grandpa)
Wasting no time, the triplets ran up to their grandparents and were welcomed with hugs and kisses.
"I remember when I was greeted like that by my parents, and then ma would give me cookies after she kissed my face."
"Ya but now you're just yesterday's news, a has been." A husky voice said.
"Uncle Alessandro," the triplets screamed.
"Come here my little zucca's." (pumpkin in Italian)
After being gently put down by their grandparents, the triplets attacked their favorite and only blood uncle.
My brother Alessandra Martinai is one scary motherfucking and after my wife he's the second most feared current mafia boss.
But the second he's put in front of my two princesses that man turns into a complete simp.
"Uncle Ale we made you and nonna pictures!" Little Angelica beamed.
"Oh boy I can't wait to see them but why don't you go show nonna the pictures first. Nonno and I will come see them after we talk with your dad, ok zucca?"
"Ok Uncle Ale" they yelled.
I don't think I'll ever get over the fact that they talk in sync so much.
Turning around the sibling trio went to my mother and with Leo leading them they made their way to their bedroom.
Firming a tight line with my mouth, "come on let's go to Reese's office and talk."
Making small talk with my brother and father about their lives, we eventually made it to Reese's office. Opening the door, we were met with my gorgeous wife holding a gun to one of her men's heads.
"Am I seeing things or is that a puddle, in between his legs?" My father questioned.
"No, you're definitely not imagining things he definitely wets his pants. That's actually the main reason why we put in hardwood floors a few years ago. You'd be so shocked but way too many men just pee their pants when they're afraid" I replied.
Reese is the most feared person in the underworld, despite that so many people come to our mafia to work with the hopes that they'll break her. An opinion that she loves because those are the ones that fall the hardest, and she loves to make them fall.
Reese had this habit of calling her man to her office, of course since they're being called to her office instead of the basement they go in relaxed.
Which is mistake number 1, they go in happy but 98% of them leave traumatized and with a pee stain in their pants.
What can I say my wife is a complete mafia boss babe.
Turning her head Reese saw us from her preferential vision, and quickly turned her head back to the worker.
"Get the fuck out of my office," she hissed.
Not having to be told twice the worker got up and was about to walk out when my wife put her hand on his arm.
"But make no mistake one little negative incident and next time you'll be peeing yourself again. But it will happen while you watch me fuck your wife... you'll probably learn a thing or two let's be honest."
Looking down at my little woman in disbelief, the worker gulped in fear and nodded his head. Walking out the door he briefly made eye contact with me.
I'm guessing he wanted me to tell my wife not to do that.
But why would I do that?
Reese doesn't do it often but sometimes to keep her workers in check, she'll have sex with their wives.
She'll never rape she would never EVER do that. I don't know how she knows which women are in too other women, she just tells me 'As a pansexual woman my gaydar is intense'.
All I know is every time they finish the woman,typically the woman ends up begging Reese for one more round, nine times out of ten the woman ends up leaving her man in hopes of finding a woman like Reese.
And no, I don't have a problem with it because I get to watch, so I encourage it.
The first few times it happened the men and women in our mafia could not believe it. But now they encourage the new recruits to do a small fuck up.
Call them sadists, but for whatever reason they just love Reese Mrs. Steal your girl, and they love to see our men complain that their wives have decided to leave them after having sex with my wife.
"Hi dad" Reese said after putting down one of the extra towels she keeps in the corner over the puddle of urine.
"Oh bambina! How's my favorite child doing? Hm, is my idiot son treating you, OK?" my dad exclaimed while wrapping his arms around Reese.
"I'm right here dad." I gritted out
"Good then you can hear me loud and clear when I say it's never too late to get an abortion. And remember if you ever hurt my daughter, I will abort your ass."
"I've always wanted to be an only child," Alessandro cheekily muttered.
"Don't worry dad, your son is treating me like the true queen that I am, but if shit gets rough, I'll help you hide the body." Reese said with a wink.
"What is it, gang up on Ace Day huh?!"
"Stop being so dramatic for a minute we have pressing matters to discuss- the safety of our little bambinas" my dad said.
In an instance the joking atmosphere we had created turned tense. We all had taken extra extra extra steps to ensure tonight went smoothly.
But we're mafia people as much as we say and would like to think no one would ever touch us. We know it's truly not possible.
"I just got off a round of phone calls with the Vietnamese, Spanish, Canadian, and French mafia. They all very nicely told me they are bringing extra men to make sure that everything goes well tonight." Reese stated.
Looking over at Alessandro he looked deep in thought, before a pissed look came over his face.
"What about the Irish and the Brazilian mafia, they're both allies ... what once we're not on our A game and they decide to just jump ship." Alessandro complained.
"Actually, they were the first to offer their people, but the Brazilian mafia unfortunately their heir was kidnapped a few days ago, and the Irish mafia princess was taken today." She spoke.
"Wait, the Irish mafia too?"
Reese and I were on the phone together when the Brazilian boss, Davi told us his son was kidnapped but this was the first, I was hearing about the Irish mafia,
"Yes, we can't confirm that it was the Swedish mafia that did it, but we think it is, and they're coming for our little babies tonight.
"Don't worry Reese, we and our many allies in addition to the Italian mafia are going to be here tonight to ensure that tonight is just another over the top extreme mafia birthday," my father said.
If only we knew what would happen tonight.
If only we knew that today would be the last day for years that we would see our little angels.
We would have changed everything, if only we knew.
Going double update, buckle up.