Walking into the kitchen I stretch my arms out, yawning. I glance at the clock on the kitchen wall, "six forty" I mutter under my breath.
I grab a piece of bread from the dispenser before putting it in the toaster. My mother bought the dispenser saying it would be a 'game changer' and I had laughed at her for it. Now now I find myself using it more than anyone else in this house.
Leaning my arms down onto the kitchen island waiting for my toast, a hand reaches over my shoulder. Watching as they put two pieces of bread into the toaster. They gently push down the metal handle in one movement. Trailing my eyes up the arm I follow the tense veins before reaching their eyes, which are well above mine.
"Morning." Colten speaks with a post sleep, rasp. He must've just woke up. That makes the two of us.
As cliche as it sounds I've known Colton since we where kids. That being said I can't help but struggle to breath through the awkward energy that always follows when we're alone. Has it always been this bad or has it been getting worse? To be fair, he only really knows me through my brother anyways. Colton grew up with him not me. I just happen to be his best friends little sister.
He met my brother, Damon, at a basketball club when they were seven and they have been inseparable ever since. I eventually met him once he started coming over to hangout with my brother after basketball practice, but we never really talked and always passed each other in the hallways as if we didn't know each other. As if he wasn't walking around in my house.
"Morning..." I'm surprised he acknowledged me at all. Usually he comes down and he goes to the fridge whilst I focus on my own breakfast. Wordlessly grabbing enough for him and Damon he retread back upstairs. This is different.
Grabbing my toast, I quickly put it onto a plate to avoid burning myself before reaching for the strawberry jam and opening it. Slowly spreading it across my toast with a butter knife I can't help but feel him staring at me. I don't ask about it through. It's not like we're incapable of interaction. There are times we do hold conversations. All of which consist of him poking at me to annoy Damon. Otherwise I don't exist to him.
He doesn't stay for long as his toast finishes soon after mine. Carelessly he grabs them both with his bare hands not reacting to how hot they are before making his way back upstairs. Wondering if it hurt him I don't think on it for too long. Once he's disappeared I pick up my plate and head to the living room couch. Deciding to sit on the ground in front of it, I cross my legs, before gently putting my plate onto the glass coffee table.
It's usually colder in the mornings out here. Living in Wisconsin is pretty hellish for me. Especially since I've never really been a fan of the cold. It's a counterproductive thought since I love Christmas. Letting out a breath I trail my thumb up the leg of the coffee table.
Staring at the gold laced design that loops around into a straight spiral pattern I move my hand up until I reach the sharp corner of the table. I've always liked to touch the legs as the bumpy design always left me with a tingle up my arm. It was another one of my mothers random purchases. She bought it for barely twenty dollars only to find out it was real gold. Since it's laced on all the legs, she got it appraised and it's supposed to be roughly three hundred. Sometimes I wonder where she finds these things.
I reach for my laptop from the wooden laptop holder I keep downstairs instead of my room, to prevent myself from watching shows all night. Before I had the stand I used to just leave the laptop around until Colton got it for me, under the guise of almost stepping on it once since I left it on the ground. I think that was the last time we spoke if you don't count today. He bought it over two weeks ago.
I've been waking up early for the past week since I've got six assignments I haven't started and only have till the end of the month to finish them. I got 2 finished earlier this week and have four left with three weeks on the clock. This is what happens when you put everything off until the due date becomes too apparent to ignore.
I open a blank document and I just start typing. What am I typing? Not important and honestly it's just word vomit but it's never failed me. My marks always turn out better than good but I think I'm pushing my luck at this point. I've never put off six at a time. Focusing on the clicking of my keyboard I pray to any available higher beings that what I'm writing is at least legible.
A few hours go by and I've long finished my toast so hunger begins to creep up my throat again.
'Are you doing the same assignment you did yesterday?' I cock my head towards the voice, only relaxing when I meet my brother's eyes. Deciding to ignore him I look back to the screen.
Despite him being tall, and really fucking toned for his age, he's incredibly light footed. Not even the beings I was praying to earlier would hear him walk into a room, he's that quiet. Though the word 'quiet' doesn't suit his character at all. Damon is the type of person to make fun of a teacher to their face or purposely hit someone in the back of the head with a basketball just because he can. He's careless. I like to remind him that it'll come back and bite him in the future but of course he didn't care when I told him.
"What the fuck Damon don't scare me like that," I mumble before turning back to the screen seeing a low power warning. Realizing it wasn't charged after it was used previously, I scold. "Who used my laptop?"
"You did. Yesterday. Like I said," he rolls his eyes before heading towards the front door but I interrupt him before he can leave.
'Wait, where are you going? Where's Colton?' I ask slowly as I divert my eyes around the open living space. He could be in another room but why would Damon alone.
'What do you mean? He left ages ago.' He raises his eyebrows as if my question was stupid. I guess it was. He'd have to walk past me to leave the house.
Confused on how I didn't notice him come back down. He must've purposely made sure not to catch my attention. It's normal for him to ignore me like that but he could've at least said bye.
"We have that basketball game against some school tonight so he went home to get ready...you're coming to watch right?"
"I've never missed one," I remind him, looking back at my laptop.
I've always gone to every single one of their basketball games. I could say I knew all the player's personally by how many times I've seen them play. That and because my brother is the captain so that could be a valid reason too.
Pretty much anyone can join the team after passing a basketball athletics test. It's the same with every sport at our school. They take it pretty seriously here. Our school is ranked number one in the state when it comes to sport and coaches and the school board want to keep it in that place. Because of it they're strict about who gets game-time and who doesn't. Meaning newcomers to the team usually get automatically benched if they somehow make it into their trialed sport. It's the worst with basketball, almost all the court time is given to the top five, every season.
Damon, Colton, Noah, Jacob and Thale. In so specific order, they are the best. The best in every category may I add. Not only are they athletically gifted, their luck bled into their physical appearances. They look good. No. Using the word good is an understatement. From my point of view, they're living the dream. They wake up, look in the mirror and stare at their perfect faces and bodies, go to the gym and probably pick up a few girls while their at it, play on court where they're loved and praised for yet again another victory before heading to school where they're adored by all. Their lives are probably heavier and more detailed than that but God would I love to be them for a day.
At least I'd rather be them then be with them. As Damon's little sister I have the unwelcomed privilege of being alone with them for periods of time. I use the word privilege because that's how it's described whenever others bring it up. You get to hangout with them out of school? I wouldn't call or hanging out, just seeing them with Damon at home. There is no way you haven't done it with one of them? If I'm being honest they see me as a little kid who wanders around their friend. Aka my sibling. Which one of them do you have a crush on? None. Not happening.
Being left with them in the living room or talking to them in the kitchen is a common occurrence for me. One that I do not fucking want. People tend to forget the reality of it all. These men aren't fantasies who'll swap spit with me if I blinked at them. They talk and breath and exist. So when I'm alone with them I'm alone with real people. Real people who wouldn't pay attention to me if I wasn't tied to their friend by relation. The only reason they even look at me is because they have to. So they don't seem rude, so no. I do not enjoy it and I am not 'lucky.' It's uncomfortable and forced. If someone offered to take my spot I'd swap with them in a heartbeat.
Scratch that, it's always discomforting unless Damon is there. He's like the mutual friend who's existence prevents the energy from being undesirable. Only in those moments do I understand why people are so infatuated by them. Otherwise I can't grasp it.
Not that I'm 'unpopular' or the 'quiet-smart girl in the corner' I'm directly in the middle of the food chain. Right where the regular people are. The ones who aren't too much or too little. There's nothing to me which in their eyes, makes me boring. I don't hold anything to my name besides Damon and they already have him. Not that they'd ever say it to my face but I can feel the thought lingering when they're around. Oh. It's just Katie.
The only difference between me and the bottom half of that chain is that I don't get tormented by the top half of it. Which is pretty much all of Damon's friends. Sometimes I wonder if him and I are even related. Maybe he sucked up all the good genes that where needed for him to get to where he is and left me with nothing.
The only perk I get from being siblings with the captain of the basketball team is I'm excused from everything. I've never been bullied or anything remotely closed. I could be blackout drunk and venerable at a party and no one from our school, Lakewood, will touch me out of fear. They don't interact with me but they also make sure not to upset me either. When they look at me, all they see is Damon and no one with more than two working brain cells would fuck with him. God even he scares me sometimes and I used to beat him with toys as a kid.
They're group is pretty big because they only have two criteria; be on the sports/cheer team, be friends with someone on the sport/cheer team. The second option isn't as easy as it is. They're all so exclusive, their egos are bigger than they're heads. Only a few funny and unapologetically pretty individuals have slipped their way through the cracks. Despite them all hanging out together,there's a difference between how the basketball team is treated compared to the other sports.
All the sports are difficult to get into given the fact that the athletics testing for each is difficult. No one is harder than the next so it's all about skill. Except for basketball, each year they rig it so it gets harder and harder and now. I wonder is the one for this year is damn near unattainable. The main five are all in their senior year now. Coach doesn't want members messing with the dynamics, especially when the five won't be here next year. So the test is virtually impossible to pass now.
Our school sees the five as Gods for passing the athletics test and managing to be in the top five even though they joined in freshman year when it was just as easy to get into as any other sport. Damon told me about it but he told me not to tell anyone so I didn't. If anything I think it's more complimentary that they would change the test, just because they consider their skills unmatchable.
Sometimes it's draining to think about how bad the hierarchy system is at my school. I wish everyone would just relax for a second. Once the basketball team graduates I feel like it will be a bit better. Sure they'll always be replacements but having them at this school only ties the knot since they sit at the top.
Which is exactly why I feel uneasy when I'm around all of them.
Well all except Noah, I don't think he could ever make me feel uncomfortable even if he tried. He's the only one who I genuinely don't mind being around and if anything I enjoy it.
Not that anyone knows that though. He made it very obvious that know one should know. Especially not Damon.