Third Person POV
Cassius hadn't even realized he had dozed off, but was jolted awake by the sound of Safania screaming. Startled, he stood up and backed away in shock. Three attendants came rushing in, including Layla.
"Safania? Safania, listen to me," Layla said, kneeling by Safania's bed. "It's Layla. You're safe."
"You're lying," Safania cried, tears streaming down her face. "Where is his majesty? Take me to him. Take me to King Alterius."
"Safania, you're safe here. He can't hurt you here."
"You're testing me," Safania accused, her eyes beginning to glow as she grew more hysterical. "I don't want to be here, I want to be with him."
Cassius looked on, horrified. He felt a pain in his chest, like someone was wringing his heart out to dry.
"Safania, deep breaths, okay?" Layla said. "Maria, you need to calm her down."
"I'm really trying," Maria replied desperately. "But I'm so tired Layla."
Layla turned back to Safania. "Safania, Cassius is here."
"Stop lying!" Safania exclaimed angrily, clenching her forehead. Sparks shot from her hands as she raised them to her head.
"I'm not lying sweetheart," Layla said calmly. "He's right here."
Layla looked at Cassius and mouthed the words "come here" to him. He stepped forward, making contact with Safania's glowing eyes.
"Saf, it's me."
Safania focused on Cassius, shaking her head. "You're not real." She turned back to Layla. "Get out of my head," she shouted angrily.
"Maria, hold up," Layla said to Maria, putting her hand up. "No one's in your head anymore Safania. And he's still here."
Safania looked to Cassius, confused.
"Do you remember when we played chess together? And you got mad at me, so you played terribly?" Cassius began.
Safania nodded slowly.
"And I put you in your room to punish you. But you..." Cassius smiled to himself. "You crawled all the way back to the library. I think mainly out of spite. I couldn't believe it. That's when I knew I was in deep, deep trouble. That's when I knew that falling in love with you was inevitable."
Safania's eyes had returned to normal. "Cassius?" she whispered.
Cassius took her hand and nodded.
Slower, silent tears began to fall down Safania's face. "I'm sorry," she whispered.
"Why?' Cassius asked, confused.
Safania paused, searching for what she wanted to say. "I'm sorry I'm not the girl you fell in love with," she finally replied, staring down at her bed.
Cassius looked at her in disbelief. "You are," he told her emphatically.
She shook her head. "He changed me. I wasn't..." she choked on her words. "I wasn't strong enough."
"Shh," he told her, pulling her to his chest. "You are stronger than anyone I've ever met. We're going to get through this."
"Will you stay?" she asked, finally looking at him with somber, tear-filled eyes.
"Always," he told her, helping her lay back down. He tenderly brushed a strand of hair out of her face and continued to gently brush her hair with his fingers as she fell asleep.
"You were great," Layla said supportively, putting a hand on his shoulder.
Cassius brushed his thumb lightly against Safania's cheek. "How often does this happen?"
"Usually once a day," Layla replied grimly.
"Do you know?"
"Know what, your highness?"
"Do you know what my psychotic brother did to her?" he asked, turning to stare at Layla with a dark expression in his eyes.
Layla paused. "Not really," she said finally. "Sometimes she lets things slip, but she's never talked about it when she's been fully conscious."
"What has she let slip?" Cassius asked, his jaw clenched.
"I think she should be the one to tell you," Layla told him softly.
Cassius looked back to Safania, a pained look covering his face.
"She is getting better," Layla said encouragingly.
"This is what better looks like?" Cassius asked.
"I know it's frustrating, but it's going to take time."
"I know," Cassius replied, looking sadly at Safania. "I just wish it had been me. She didn't deserve any of this."
"No one deserves this," Layla replied.
"Will she remember this when she wakes up?"
"It depends," Layla answered. "Sometimes she has a vague recollection of it...sometimes she doesn't remember it at all."
Cassius nodded.
"I'll leave you alone then," Layla said. "But we're here if you need anything."
"Thank you," Cassius replied, his gaze already completely focused back on his sleeping fiancé.
**********
Safania's POV
When I woke up, the first thing I saw was Cassius looking at me. "You're up," he said with a soft smile.
"I...I don't remember falling asleep," I said, confused. "The last thing I remember was talking with you on a rock, looking out over the meadow. I fell asleep on you, didn't I? I am so sorry."
Cassius continued to smile while he helped me sit up. "You needed your rest," he said encouragingly.
"What time is it?" I asked, looking around. The sun was up, so it was still daytime.
"Late afternoon," he replied.
"I've been asleep for hours?" I responded, shocked.
Cassius hesitated.
"What?" I asked him.
"You...woke up for a little bit. But you pretty much went straight back to bed."
I racked my brain trying to remember. I didn't remember waking up. Wait...yes I did. Cassius had talked about playing chess. Why were we talking about that? My brain was such a garbled mess. I had giant gaps where I knew things happened, but I had no idea what.
"I had another episode, didn't I?" I asked, talking a guess.
Cassius paused, then nodded.
"And you saw..." I said aloud, embarrassed. "You have to understand Cas, I don't mean what I'm saying. It's like...it's not even me saying it. I don't even remember what happened, but I know in the past I've said some really messed up things. I'm really sorry." I babbled.
"Shh," Cassius told me. "Saf, you don't have to explain any of this to me. I've been training with Peria's military since I was a child. This is all normal following a traumatic event."
Right. He had seen this sort of thing before. He had been in battle...he had fellow soldiers get captured. And he had captured other soldiers in return...
I felt panic rising in my chest. Had he tortured people before? Did he know what Alterius had done to me? Had he done it to someone else?
Of course not, I told myself. This was Cassius. Your Cassius. He's not his brother. I tried to convince myself, but I couldn't shake the panic. I started to feel like the walls were closing in on me.
"Saf? Hey, stay with me, okay?" Cassius said to me. I looked to him in terror. "Saf, what is it? Talk to me," he pleaded.
I tried to keep my breathing even. Don't ask, I told myself. You'll hurt him. He'll know you don't trust him.
But I had to know.
"Have...have you ever tortured someone?" I asked, the question escaping my lips.
Cassius frowned. "Yes..." he answered reluctantly.
It was the answer I had been expecting, but it felt as though all the air had been sucked out of the room.
"Saffy, please let me explain before you start jumping to conclusions," Cassius said calmly, clearly observing my panic. My eyes met his, waiting for his explanation. He sighed.
"Three people," he told me. "The first was a soldier who deserted his watch, which led to his entire unit being killed. I kept him in solitary confinement for a week, then banished him to the Northern colonies. The second was an Iradian soldier who knew where they were keeping one of our top generals. I'm normally a good interrogator, but we knew we didn't have much time, so we used more extreme methods to get him to talk. The third was involved in the plot to kill my mother. He had run away like a coward, but my soldiers eventually found him." Cassius finally broke his eye contact with me. "I'm not entirely proud of what I did to him," he admitted.
"What about lashings?" I asked, finding it hard to believe that he had only ever tortured three people. "Are you including that?"
"I don't lash people Saf," Cassius said quietly.
"But...you told me that you're used to obedience. And people are so afraid of you."
Cassius smiled faintly. "People who gain respect and submission through the sword lose it just as easily when the sword is taken away. If your only power comes from hurting others, you're not really that powerful."
I nodded slowly. "And...you never..." I struggled, trying to ask the question I desperately needed to ask, even though I already knew the answer. "You never...to a woman..."
"Safania," Cassius murmured sadly. He knew exactly what I was getting at, and I could hear the pain in his voice that I was even asking. "Of course not. I would never, ever do that."
"I know," I said quickly, feeling the tears start to build up in my eyes again.
"Then why ask?" he asked me, confused and hurt.
"I just...I don't know. I guess I just wanted to hear you say it."
We sat in silence for some time after that, tears now silently rolling down my cheeks.
"Saf?" Cassius asked quietly.
"Do you still love me?" I asked him, too afraid to look at his face.
He sat on the bed next to me. "Come here," he said, pulling me onto his lap and holding me closely. "I will love you until the end of time Safania of Eir. Nothing will ever change that."
I let Cassius's familiar scent and embrace calm me. As he held me, I could feel tension leaving my body.
"Can I ask you something?" Cassius asked me after a few minutes, while he continued to hold me.
I nodded.
"Would you mind...could I say something to our baby?"
Surprised, I turned my head to look at him.
"I'm sorry," he said quickly. "That's weird, isn't it? I don't want you to feel uncomf-"
"Of course you can," I answered, interrupting him.
"Really?"
"Yes," I said, smiling.
Cassius placed his hand on my stomach tenderly. I still didn't have a bump - Layla said it would still be a few more weeks before I started showing.
"Hi baby," Cassius said gently. "I just want you to know how much your mama and I love you. And I want you to know how lucky you are to have such a strong mother," he said. "And I promise I will protect you. Both of you," he said, looking at me. "Saffy, I'm so sorry."
"It's not your fault," I said, shaking my head.
"I'm going to make it right," he told me firmly, his eyes growing dark.
"What are you talking about?" I asked, confused. Before he could answer, my mother entered my room.
"Safania!" she said, surprised. "You're awake."
I nodded. "Did you come to visit?"
"I'm actually here for Cassius," she replied. "We have to prepare for our presentation tomorrow, and we have a few things to discuss."
"Presentation?" I asked, confused.
"You haven't told her yet?" my mother asked.
"I was just about to," Cassius replied.
"What's going on?" I asked, looking to Cassius.
"We're proposing an invasion of Peria," Cassius replied. "We're going to take out Alterius."
I froze. "No," I said firmly. "You can't."
"Why?" Cassius asked.
I felt the tears start to prickle my eyes again.
"I can't lose you again. Either of you."
Cassius looked lovingly into my eyes as they pooled with tears for probably the hundredth time that day. He took my hand.
"You aren't going to lose us," he tried to assure me. "But we can't let Alterius control Peria. You know better than anyone what he's capable of."
"That's exactly why I'm saying you can't go," I replied.
"Saffy, I promised to make a world that's safe for our child. I need to do this to keep that promise."
"We have a plan starfish," my mother interjected. "And if we can convince the elementalists to join us, Alterius won't stand a chance."
I nodded reluctantly. I had seen what the elementalists could do, and it was incredible. But I also knew what Alterius was capable of. He had no limits, no moral code, and he would do anything to stay in power - even things others would find unthinkable. But my mother and Cassius were right. As long as Alterius was in power, none of us were safe.
"I'll be back my love, okay?" Cassius told me. He placed a soft kiss on my forehead.
"Before we leave, I have a little surprise for you," my mom told me. "I don't want you to get lonely waiting up for either of us, and since you've been doing so well, I got the approval to let a guest stay with you."
My mom walked outside the tent and returned with Emalina. I vaguely remembered spending time with her on our way to the camp, but I hadn't seen her since we made it here. She looked slightly awkward, unsure of how to act around me.
"Em!" I exclaimed, getting up from the bed to hug her. She immediately relaxed and hugged me back, probably relieved that I was lucid and happy to see her.
"We'll be back later," my mother said. "You two will have plenty of time to catch up."
"Take good care of her," Cassius said to Emalina before leaving.
"Of course, your highness," Emalina replied, now acting like her normal, cheerful self. In typical Emalina-fashion, she started spewing gossip at me before Cassius and my mother had even fully left the tent. She continued to talk at the speed of light in an attempt to catch me up on all the current drama in world record time.
I smiled. For the first time in weeks, things felt normal.
**********
Third Person POV
"She seems like she's doing well," Zamari said, as she and Cassius walked to her tent after leaving Safania and Emalina.
"She had an episode earlier..." Cassius told Zamari.
Zamari's expression darkened. "When I think about what that bastard did to her..."
"Has she talked to you about it?" Cassius asked.
Zamari shook her head. "Not at all. But she's not ready. She may never be ready."
Cassius nodded. He tried not to think about what his brother may have done to Safania, but his mind was already running wild with possibilities. "What do we need to talk about?" he asked Zamari, trying to take his mind off of it.
"We're not giving the presentation anymore," Zamari replied.
"What? Why not?"
"Because strategically it's better for someone else to give it."
"Who?" Cassius asked.
They had arrived outside of Zamari's tent. Zamari pulled the door open, revealing Valery sitting inside.
"Hello, your highness," Valery said with a smirk.