How does it feel?
It is only cognized by the person who went through the emotion, the pain.
Some comforting phrases are not always what the person needs,
Because they can be delivered by everyone.
What the person requires is the warmth and love, feeling of someone who is there who listens...
Listening is itself a greater power,
Though, where is the person who wanted to be heard?
Without him, the bench in the lawn feels lifeless,
Without him, the cafeteria seat makes me lose my appetite,
Without him, the library feels like all the demons from the books are after me.
Without him, I don't feel the need to be.
How does it feel?
It is only known by the person who went through the emotion, the pain.
"How's this one?" I asked, showing my diary to Vian.
He was peacefully sleeping on the bed where I was writing the verse for our novella under the effect of the table lamp, however, accompanied by a little moonlight giving peaceful insights which were soon to be become into the orange hues of the sun turning the sky magical again.
"Love, it's four in the morning, do you want me to get up now and see?" He whined in his sleepy voice, rubbing his eyes nonchalantly, laying on his front on the bed.
"Ouch!" I shouted a little dramatically to gain his attention. And I got it.
He shuttered opened his eyes and turned his head towards my side, "What happened? Did you get hurt?" He asked in a hurry.
"I was kidding. Hehe. But now that I have your attention, please see this piece of verse," I pleaded.
"Not funny, Jo."
He took the diary from my hands and glared at me with his dramatic anger-filled eyes and then softened them as I showed him my toothy smile.
"It's - it's... well, I have no words left. It's perfect for the protagonist at this point. Great work, Author!" He exclaimed and pat the diary on my head, still angry that I woke him up to make him read this, and I couldn't help but feel shy at his remark and bit my lip.
Make your sleep mode on. I'm tired of working for you.
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I woke up the next day a little late.
Nothing new for us.
Because I slept late!
I told you to turn your sleep mode on, it's not that difficult to switch it off on time.
Vian was ready in his bottle-green-colored outfit and told me about today's activities, which included trekking and a special bonfire arrangement at night.
He said again, "Good morning, sunshine! We have to meet someone today, love. Get ready."
"Good morning, marshmallowz! And with whom?" I asked stretching my hands and legs, yawning like an ape.
"It's a surprise! Just get ready quickly, breakfast is ready!" He exclaimed.
"I'm too tired to get ready!" I whined.
"Do you need my help?" He asked, smirking, and I was fully awake by then suddenly.
"No- just get out!" I said, and he walked out of the room laughing.
I got ready, though I was late, he didn't mind, and continued journaling sitting on one of the seats near the kitchen island.
Wearing my black sneakers, at last, we were ready to move out to meet "someone" that was a surprise for me.
Act with curiosity! If I were Vian, I would have canceled the plan of going out with you.
"Hold this bottle for a minute, my shoelaces are not properly tied," I said and stretched my hand for him to hold my diary and bottle for a minute.
He didn't say anything and just stood there with his expressionless face again.
"What?" I snapped my fingers at him to bring him back, in case he had zoned out.
Just like you. Bahaha
"What?" He snapped back sternly.
"I asked you something?" I said and gestured at the stuff in my hands.
He didn't say anything again and kneel down, knotting the loosened lace tight, and stood up, clapping his hands scantly to remove the unseen dust.
"Umm... thanks!" I exclaimed lowly, and a small smile lingered on my face.
"Where are we going? Just tell me already! I hate surprises. Like I love them too, but I hate them too. Can't help," I stated after trekking for a while.
The words "clarity and precision" left from your dictionary. I waved them Goodbye, just now.
"Wait, Princess, good things take time."
"I can't wait, Prince," I bowed at him, and we snorted and fell into a fit of laughter.
"Don't call me Prince, jeez, that sounds weird."
"But that's the truth, Prince, a Princess must have her Prince by her side."
"Sometimes I wonder, that before meeting with you my life was dull yet sincere, but after meeting you I can't stop making satirical comments..."
"Because... that's the real you, Vian. You have trapped yourself in this shell, and the time has come to break that shell out and be free."
He nodded at me, scrunching his nose, and announced suddenly, "We have reached... the lake."
What? The lake? I couldn't comprehend that I was imagining the story I read yesterday or was it all happening in front of my eyes... but it felt so real.
He intertwined my hand in his just like every time, his every finger complimented by my smaller one, holding his hand tightly.
"Let's meet some swans? Shall we?" He asked knowingly.
Vian took a step into the boat and held my hand tightly. I carefully entered the boat which was moving involuntarily in the water and sat at one corner of the boat.
He started to row the boat and despite the restricted place, we went deeper rowing in the lake.
That's not restricted for you. Deep down, you know that.
He slowed the pace of the moving boat because the sight around us left us bewildered in amazement.
Many swans swam across our boat, some flapping their wings while some stretching their necks.
"Umm... I don't think it's a good idea, because they are not those and seems like they don't know us now..." I said because the swans didn't feel like they were there to be friendly with us.
One of the swans came near Vian, and before I could say something, Vian shushed me up. He slightly and very politely bowed his head, despite knowing of the consequences.
To my contrary surprise, the swan bowed at him back and made a gurgling sound from her neck. She entwined her long neck with Vian's and spread its wings to cover him in his embrace.
What a once in a blue moon scenery!
I was scared, but he seemed calm and serene around them. The other swans had encircled our small boat, fidgeting around, making babbling sounds.
He gestured me to do the same, the memories of what the professor had told us once came in my mind, and I bowed in front of all of them to make them believe that I was not going to hurt them.
So there's no need to be all defensive and frenzy.
The other swan hugged me in her embrace too, and instead of getting scared this time, I caressed the soft feathers on her beautiful skin lightly to which she snuggled her head in the crook of my neck which forced out a giggle out of my mouth.
I caressed the other swans too, and they all chafed their beak on my hair like they were trying to kiss me.
Vian and I tittered at this beautiful environ, which was unbelievable to everyone but mesmerizing, amazing for us.
Enjoying the moment, I didn't forget to click pictures to remember and pause this memory till my existence in this world.
Two swans formed a heart shape with their necks, making us laugh in happiness. The sound of them, mixed with the sound of us giggling with them, felt like the esthesis when one finds peace.
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We reached back near the cottages where the bonfire was being set up but before that, a performance by the dwellers was programmed and was added on the spot to the day's activity.
We were given traditional dresses of their village to make it feel more resonating and memorable.
Vian and I changed into the royal clothing, where mine one was a pretty white gown.
"You look beautiful," he remarked when I was setting my hair into a bun. I couldn't help the happy feeling eliciting within me every time he complimented me.
"Thanks! You look handsome as always my Royal Prince," I bowed at him chuckling.
He removed the hairpin from my hair and let my hair fall freely on my back. He tucked the loose strands of hair behind my ear and pecked my lips.
"Don't apply that blushing thing you use..." he stated standing beside me looking at my reflection in the mirror.
"Why?"
"Because I think it'll overdo your natural cherry glow," he remarked, and I squinted my eyes at him cloyingly and let out a chuckle.
Still, I couldn't believe how everything was going so perfectly.
For once, think of an answer and spat back on his face.
"Vian... don't eat sweets today..." I remarked at what I made instantaneously.
"Why?"
"Because you already are so sweet today!"
Was I supposed to laugh?
"HA- HA?!" He forced himself to laugh, but it was obvious. I messed up.
Tell me about it, we already know this. No surprise for us.
"How much time did you spend coming up with that line?" He asked all of a sudden.
"Vian!!!!" I whined and begged him to keep all the caustic remarks aside for everyone but me.
We went out of the cottage to witness the pleasant evening I hadn't seen in a while.
The night sky was covered with a greenish hue of the galaxy and different colors were roaming and flickering around caused by the fireworks let in the open sky. It felt like the village illumined in this soothing light.
Vian's face prophesied with happiness and joyousness as soon as he saw the fireworks. His dark past was now concealed with love and kindness, just like all these colors hiding the dark sky.
The performance by the natives continued for a while, and we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves with them while singing as well as dancing with them too. Vian was too shy to dance, but I wanted to enjoy this day to the fullest, so without thinking I jumped in between the pool of women and danced along with them.
As if you think before doing anything.
The bonfire was set, the cantaloupe-colored aura all around, swaying our heads to the soft music playing in the background. My head was on Vian's shoulder, and we were seated near the bonfire while hugging our legs.
The day couldn't get any better. Only that it felt like the peace before the storm.
"Let's play a game, guys, a game of Truth and Dare!" Chloe spoke as soon as the professor and some other students left back to their cottages.
I was too mesmerized and hypnotized by the scenery in front of my eyes, that leaving early didn't work out for me.
She spun an empty bottle, a smirk plastered on her face, and the bottle pointed at her friend, Bonny.
She chose Truth to my contrary image of her. "So Bonny, are you Chloe's slave? Because I didn't see her doing any of her work on her own." Someone asked her, to which all made sarcastic hooting.
I didn't care much and hugged Vian from the back, my head still on his shoulder. He snaked his arm around my shoulder and rested his head on top of mine lightly.
Just then, my name was called, bringing me out of my fantasy bubble.
"So, Jo, truth or dare?" Chloe asked me.
"Ah... truth as always..." I answered.
"Do you really like Vian? Or this is a part of your game plan?" She asked me, making me knit my eyebrows in confusion on hearing her words. The hooting voices started again. Only if they were serious this time.
"I don't need to prove my love to anyone. But since I chose truth, I will answer your question, that I love him."
The strange hooting voices turned into gasps and excited hooting, making the smirk on Chloe's face wide enough.
"Then what's this?"
She clicked on her phone and a recorded voice echoed near the bonfire.
"It will always be a part of my plan to get close to Vian first, and I promise you that I will make him this vulnerable under my spell of fake love that he will speak out the real truth from his mouth himself without me even asking for it. By hook or by crook. By love or by war."
Muted gasps and murmurs filled the field area, while my face lacked expressions. I didn't dare to look towards Vian and my lips started to tremble. The uneasiness could be easily predicted by just looking at my face.
The shock hit me like a rock because I was the one who had said those words... it was my voice. The secret plan was now in front of everyone.
Chloe and Bonny were the ones laughing at me this time, and I couldn't help but speak out about anything. Because no voice came out of my mouth.
The secret which was always meant to be a secret was out now. And I was the one who was at fault.
My hand was yanked in midair by none other than Vian as thick drops of fresh tears started to fall down his cheeks from his bloodshot eyes.
I couldn't help my body like I had lost all the senses of speaking, moving, hearing, or anything. I could hear just one thing... the sound of sobs leaving from his mouth and the sound of my breathing, which was heavy enough.
My eyes just saw him getting away from me... far, far away by every ounce of time moving.
"N-no-" I tried to speak, but my blurry vision and hoarse throat didn't help me at all.
Was this the end? Was this our destiny?
I was betraying him... all this long... and I knew this. I knew this all along.
I kept my hands on my mouth, still trying to process what the hell just happened? How did I let this happen?
I couldn't become the Princess he loved, but he was always my Prince.
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Thoughts?🦋