I wore my new necklace everywhere. Even into the city with Ava, as we maneuvered through the many stores and their Christmas sales. I'd started to really love shopping now that I could get whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted, for myself.
It bothered me a little that I probably seemed selfish, but I tried to drown that thought with the fact that I'd never had the chance to be selfish before. Even if I wasn't, I let myself be. Just for a little while.
"Oh my god!" Ava put her hands on her cheeks as she stared in front of us, her squeal making me nervous for her. Then she took off, and I was afraid I'd lose her in the sea of people, but she stopped as she slammed into a wall of a man, who lifted her and wrapped his arms around her.
The kiss they shared made me feel hot, and I quickly glanced around to make sure they weren't being stared at. I could've guessed by watching less than half of their greeting that this was Ava's boyfriend, the one she was so deeply in love with after having such a bad relationship before.
"I thought you'd be gone until New Years!" Ava sounded breathless as she finally reconnected with the ground, and beamed up at the man. His cheeks were covered in light stubbles, matching his blonde, styled hair.
He was handsome, and his smile and eyes looked kind. Though he wasn't even in the same league as James—but maybe I was biased.
"I wanted to surprise you," he said, smiling. "Is this your new friend? Nina's sister?"
I tried to ignore the slight edge in his voice as he said my sister's name, but it wasn't easy. It seemed everyone had something against her, and I understood, but she was my sister and I felt a need to protect her.
But I managed to hold my tongue.
"Yes," Ava confirmed, "this is Elina. Elina, this is Gage. My boyfriend."
"I could've guessed that," I told them, holding my hand out to greet Gage.
He took it and smiled. "Sorry about the PDA."
"No, don't be, you missed each other!" I waved his apology off, and smiled, excited to finally meet the man Ava had told me so much about during our night out, and this morning.
"A lot," Ava confirmed, wrapping her arms around the man's waist. "Do you want to get lunch with us, Gage?"
"I'd love to," he replied, then he shot me a questioning look, "if I'm not ruining your girl-time?"
"Not at all," I said, linking my arm with Ava's, "I'd love to get to know this amazing man I've heard so much about."
From what I knew, he wasn't associated with the mafia very much. As an errand boy, he only had limited information at hand, and that's the way everyone involved liked it. Ava knew the risks of that, but then again, she said was so far on the outside that it shouldn't really be an issue. I hoped she was right, and that the long experience she had in this world meant she knew better.
Even if she could be blinded by love.
We found an area with food trucks just down the street from where we ran into Gage, and after ordering way too many small taco's and making small talk, I had to admit I understood how Ava could fall so quickly. He was charming and sweet, and it didn't seem like he had a bad bone in his body.
I was a little concerned that he did, though. I'd read too many books where the innocent guys turned out to be villains, even if I wanted to believe the best. I crushed my doubts with another bite of the delicious Mexican dish, as my phone vibrated in my purse.
It was pure luck I found it before it stopped ringing, and I excused myself to take it. Not that they minded; Ava was already seated on Gage's lap, as if I wasn't there anymore.
"Hello?" My voice was probably less than flattering as I dabbed a napkin on my lips and swallowed some food.
"What are you eating?" The sound of James' voice made me smile. "Is it inappropriate to say I wish it was me?"
I let out a giggle. "Yes, but I like it," I admitted. "I'm having some delicious taco's, with Ava and her boyfriend. Though I'm currently third-wheeling hard."
I glanced at the couple, who'd now started feeding each other sensually, as if no one else was around at all. I both loved and hated it.
"Sounds nice. Mind if I crash your party?" he asked, and to be honest, my heart started racing just with the thought of an unofficial double date with my friend. "I'm off for today, Damian told me I had to get laid, 'cause I was being annoying."
"I can fix that later." I wished he was in front of me so I could give him a wink. I said, "Please crash the party, they've forgotten I'm here, I think. By all the food trucks."
"Save me a taco?"
The hope in his voice made me smile. "No promises. Hurry." I hung up, feeling all kinds of giddy as I took another bite of the shell I'd started when my phone rang, as I leaned across the table to tap Ava's shoulder. She looked startled and apologetic as she met my gaze, and I grinned. "James is coming, I hope you don't mind."
"Oh, not at all!" She sounded genuinely happy about it, actually, which warmed my heart. "Baby, Elina's boyfriend is joining us too."
Gage looked as if he didn't know who Elina was for a second, and I bit my lips together to hide my laughter. When he turned his head towards me, it was obvious he'd been lost in his girl, and forgot all about me, and I really, really liked that Ava had someone who cared that deeply about her after what I'd understood had happened to her in the past.
I didn't mind at all that I didn't exist to this guy. In fact, I applauded it. And I winked at him as he smiled apologetically my way.
"Probably for the best," he muttered, "since we're forgetting her. Sorry. Again."
"Again, don't be." I smiled reassuringly and eyed the last taco I'd bought, seriously considering eating it. Even if I said I'd save it for James. My kindness won over my stomach, and I let it sit, as I asked, "What do you do, Gage?"
I wasn't sure I wanted to ask, but an errand boy for someone far out of the inner circle of men and weapons couldn't possibly live on whatever he was paid to deliver stuff. This family was tight knit enough that errand boys weren't even that needed anymore. I knew dad had fired his a few years ago.
He cleared his throat and sat a little straighter, clearly trying to make an effort to be nice to Ava's friend. "I'm an editor for a magazine," he said, shrugging it off like it was nothing when Ava beamed up at him with pride.
A normal job. For a normal man. A good one, too.
"Have I heard of it?" I decided I liked having a conversation with someone who didn't know about the worst of the mafia and the public executions and didn't smell of blood when they got home from work.
That had happened at least twice since I officially got together with James. Both those times, that I knew of, he'd go straight for me, to kiss me. As if he was afraid I wasn't real, or something. He never washed up beforehand, and as a result, I had become so accustomed to the coppery tang in my nose as his lips touched mine, that I probably wouldn't even think twice about it anymore.
That scared me a little, so the innocent gleam in Gage's eyes interested me.
"I don't know, it's called Wireframe," he said, "it's a tech-thing."
"Oh." I nodded. I hadn't heard of it, but it sounded even more normal. Ordinary.
Maybe I'd made a mistake when choosing James. My life could've been very different if the man I'd end up with wasn't a Strac. Or an Orlov. Or a Wrecker. Whatever that meant. I wanted to choke my thoughts dead, because I hadn't ever been happier than I was with James.
I hadn't ever had so many mind blowing orgasms either. My own hands and toys couldn't get me remotely close to what James did with his mouth, his large, skilled hands and his cock. So thinking I'd be better off with someone outside of the family was seriously wrong. No one outside would be better equipped to help me should something happen—like that little trip to Durfair.
My thoughts were out of control. I had no idea why I was suddenly doubting the best thing that had ever happened to me, just because Ava had a loving relationship with a decent man—a decent man who didn't smell like gunpowder, or would come home to her, kiss her and she'd have to wash his shirts and get the blood out—
"You saved one!" James pulled me out of that miserable train of thoughts, and I forced a smile. It wasn't hard, because he sat down next to me, put his hand around my neck and pulled me in for a deep kiss.
My doubts were eradicated. James was it, just like he'd said all along. He was mine, and I was his, and there was nothing that could ever change the way I looked at him, or him at me. Especially not when his kisses made my stomach turn over in glee, and my whole body was lit on fire—even out in public.
"It was hard," I told him, sending him a strict look as he pulled back.
He raised a brow. "I know more things that are—"
"This is Gage," I interrupted, clearing my throat before he could reference his cock in front of my friends. I dared to think Gage was a friend too. "He's Ava's boyfriend."
James grinned wildly at me, kissing my heated cheek quickly, before he leaned across the table to shake hands with Gage. "James," he introduced himself, "Elina's future husband."
"Oh, you're engaged?" Gage lifted his eyebrows, and looked to where my hands rested on the table.
"Not yet," James said, "but I've asked a handful of times already."
Gage smiled. "And you're still together, even if she said no?"
"Yeah, it's no big deal." James pulled me closer, letting me sit between his legs where he sat with one leg on either side of the bench-seat. He picked up my last taco and said, "She'll say yes soon enough."
I just rolled my eyes as he winked at me, and took a bite of the food. Gage's smile widened as he looked at Ava, letting his gaze drop down to her hands as if he was considering asking her something too. The difference would be that Ava would jump up and down with joy and say yes, while I'd laugh it off if he asked again.
The question had lost all meaning between James and I. Or maybe I was just being stupid. It wouldn't be the first time, and as I watched my man's chiseled jaw move as he ate and kept talking to Gage and Ava, I wondered why I didn't just say yes the first time he asked. It wasn't rocket science to figure out that he'd been right.
I sighed, leaning against James' chest as I heard it rumble with laughter. His arm went around my waist, holding me close, as I shared a very happy smile with Ava.
After a few more minutes of talking, James and Gage decided we would go see a movie together. I hadn't been to a movie theater my whole life, so the excitement that built up inside me was on another level. Especially when the one we went to looked old on the outside, and new on the inside.
"I vote for a boring movie, so we can flirt and make out on the back row," Gage said as we looked at the scheduled movies on the screens.
"I second that," James agreed, squeezing my hand.
I didn't object, and neither did the giggling girl in Gage's arms, so we ended up going to a movie that our men said would be boring as hell.
With popcorn and soda, we settled on the back row, where I was mesmerized by the view. Seeing a movie theater in real life was something completely different from seeing one in a movie, so I smiled widely and sat back to enjoy the experience.
Not that I saw much of the movie. James had his arm around me, and kept kissing my cheek and neck, until I turned to tell him to slow down, and he captured my lips with his instead.
I felt like a teenager. A rebellious teenager who wasn't allowed to date boys, so I snuck out to the movies where no one would see that I made out with the cutest boy in school. Only I was an adult, and my boyfriend was the cutest boy in the whole damn city.
I made him promise to take me to a movie we'd want to see some time, and he did, albeit a bit breathless and occupied with biting my lower lip. If we didn't go straight home after this, I'd probably end up jumping him in an alley or something, because his hungry kisses were making me into a living, throbbing puddle.
And I loved it.
I loved him.