I woke to my head throbbing with pain, but that was more my fault, after the funeral last week, I locked myself in my room and stayed there, so now, not only do I have a headache, but my stomach was rumbling so hard that I was sure the whole compound could hear it, so that was particularly my fault, I hadn't eaten or dranken anything after the night I left Arthurs funeral and to be honest my body was really starting to feel the effects of that.
Just when I climbed out of bed and put a black robe over me, I stepped over to the door but instantly fell as the sling ricochet and I groaned whilst hearing a knock on the door, 'One second', I said whilst taking the strap off, shoved it under the blanket and walked over to the door.
As soon as I opened it, I saw Bucky stood there with worry, 'are you okay, what happened', he says as I nod, 'I'm okay, I just fell', I said whilst seeing that he became relieved. Honestly, he's been doing that since Arthur's funeral, I mean, knocking on my door to see if I was okay and of course me being me, I just ignored him and went back to staring out the window and I'd just completely felt bad for ignoring him and everyone else that came to my door, but it was mostly him anyway.
After Vivian, I honestly just locked myself up in my room so I didn't give the team shit and say something I'd regret.
When I was just about to say something, we heard my stomach again and he just gave me a look, 'let's go, we should eat something', he suggests as I wrap myself up tighter and shook my head, 'I don't want to go downstairs', I said as he sighed, 'Fine let's go out and eat', he suggested again and I just simply nod, I had no energy to argue, I had a feeling he was going to win anyway.
________
I watched as Bucky smiled and talked to the market stand owner whilst I held the food and he brought some peaches, 'mulțumesc', he says as I stare at him, he knows Romanian, one of the languages I know too.
'Come on', he says, looking back at me when he gave the old women the money for the plums he brought, 'ta schimbarea', she says as we look back at her and again he gives her a smile and says, 'A pastra aceasta', he says as she nods, and we walk away to find a seat.
Once we did, we sat down as he unwrapped the food containers and I looked at everything, I didn't know what this type of food was, but it looked intriguing and delicious, well I hope it is anyway.
He handed me a pair of wooden sticks as I watched him break his in two, so I followed the same process and pulled it apart like he did.
I had no idea how to do this, I've never eaten with sticks before, knives and forks, yes, but this was different, how am I supposed to eat it.
Just when I was going to ask for some proper cutlery, I internally shut my mouth because I knew I'd say something wrong and I didn't want to offend someone that overheard me, but I didn't know how to use these, there was no pointy edges like they have on a fork to pick your food with, instead, it was a simple stick, well two anyway.
Bucky for some reason put his sticks down after putting one of the pieces in his mouth and reached out to the sticks I had in my hand, I think he could see the questions running through my head and he'd be correct, 'hold it like this', he says, directing my hand the way it should be held as I watched, he made me hold it like two pencils with both bases touching each other and I held the other one against my ring finger and held it with the base of my thumb, 'move the top chopstick with your thumb, index finger and middle finger', he instructed as I did it and he gave me a proud nod, 'good, now try to pick one up', he says as I look at the containers and see which one to pick but he points at one for me, 'try the spicy tuna roll', he suggested again and I try picking it up. It fell the first time, I didn't think it would, but it fell back in the box, so I picked it up, this time, adding a little pressure so it didn't wobble out of my control and ate it.
'It's good', I said as he chuckled and nodded, 'I know', he says and then tells me to try the rest.
________
He handed me a plum after we ate and thankfully I wasn't completely useless and knew how to eat it became I've had them before, 'do you like plums', I asked as he nods, 'It's good for the brain, all that antioxidants, it keeps it protected', he explained as I nod, how have I just noticed how clever he is, maybe it's because I don't talk to anyone and made a mental note to fix that, I need to do better as a new member of the team, even though I have been here for nine months, but still I need to do better, even if it is temporary.
'Look', he says, pointing at something and I look over at it, 'do you want to go on it', he asked as I look back at him, 'really', I asked as he nods and chuckled at the same time, 'let's go', he says as I quickly get up and follow behind him, this was going to be exciting.
________
I stared at Bucky, who was already sat on the seat, and, just now noticed how close we'll be sitting next to each other so I took a moment and then walked over to take a seat.
When I did, the man put the bar down whilst Bucky's hand came out to me, 'here', he says as I take the cone and look at the fluffy blue cloud, 'what is it', I asked as I looked at him, 'candyfloss', he answered, simply and then I nod, 'and how do I eat it', I asked again whilst his hand came out, ripped some off and ate it whilst I watched him, 'is it nice', I asked and listen to him chuckle, 'try it', he says as I look back at it, rip some off and ate it, wow, a sugary delight, the thought ran across my mind as it instantly melts in my mouth.
'Do you like it', he questioned as I nod again, 'Mmm, I've never had it before', I said as he chuckled and rips another piece whilst I look at his gloved hand, why does he wear a glove on one hand and not the other, it doesn't make any sense, the thought ran across my mind whilst he ate.
Very weird indeed, she says as I nod a little and agreed, I wanted to ask, but I thought it be a rude question or that he had insecurities or he would feel uncomfortable, so I refrained myself from doing that.
'There has to be a cleaner way of eating this', I said as I looked down at my fingers and saw the little specks of candied feathers on them, 'when we get down, I'll get a water bottle and you wash your hands', he suggests, so when I nod again, I notice his silent laugh.
________
We headed back to the compound after two rides around the Ferris wheel and looked over at the team who we're playing some sort of bored game and they just looked at me in surprise, 'when did you come out of your room Y/n', Wanda asked as I look at her, 'oh uhm, Bucky took me out to get some food', I said as they all smiled.
'Well, come on, you should join us, we just started a new game', Sam said as we walked over and I saw that they we're playing monopoly, which was one of the games that me, Coulson and the team used to play, so we could pass the time and I guess this team do the same too.
Tony had come out from somewhere, probably from his lab downstairs as they look at him, 'already done', Nat says as he shook his head, 'Of course it hasn't, the thing just likes to break down on me Nat', he says as they laughed.
'What's wrong with it now', Pietro asked, and he shrugged his shoulders a little, 'that's what I'm trying to figure out, I've infused it, but it won't add to the agility, and now the kid is getting on my nerves that he wants to be able to jump even higher', he explained, '...and I thought hell didn't exist', he says as they laughed again whilst I picked up the cards and looked at them, 'you could attune the boots', I said as they all looked at me whilst Tony poured himself a scotch, 'what', he questioned again.
'Attune the boots of the wearer, if you do, they'll be able to project an additional fifteen feet just to get that extra leverage', I explained, shuffling the cards, and rearranging the board back to start.
'How do you know all this', Tony questioned.
'Because I'm an expert in engineering, Aerospace engineering and Nuclear, oh and the mechanical part of it too', I responded.
'Really, I could do with the help', he says as I shook my head again, 'I told you, I don't want to, besides, you have it handled', I said.
________
I went for a coffee after my all – nighter and sighed under my breath, now they can't complain I don't do anything for them, the thought ran across my mind as I pour the hot substance into a to go mug and once it's filled, I walk out.
I breeze hit against my face as I walk further out and take sips, allowing the substance to heat my body and to shield me from the cold.
I sat at the end of the cliff again, just like every morning actually, how long, she asked as I brought my hand out again, 'rising from the east', I began to say and then counted how many hours there'll be, 'two hours left for the sun to reach full peak', I said and just when I thought she'd answer, someone laughed behind me, so when I turned, I saw Bucky and Steve and put my hand down, 'morning', Steve said, taking a seat beside me as Bucky did too, 'morning', I replied and then looked back again.
'How do you know', Bucky asked as I look at him, 'how do I know what', I asked.
'The sun', he answered as I nod, put my coffee mug down, grab his hand, which was insanely hard and even heavy too which I found weird, but ignored it and made sure his fingers we're parallel to the horizon, once they we're in place, 'see that', I said as he looked over and nods, 'now your index finger rests just below the sun and your pinkie parallel to the edge of the horizon', I explained whilst he nods again, 'and then you move your hand up and count and you should get two hours', I said whilst letting go and he does it, 'your right, two hours', he says.
'I know I am', I said as they both chuckle and I teach Steve to do it to, I'm not going to leave one of them out, besides, I like teaching people new things they don't know.
________
I decided to join the team with their meeting, I hadn't been to one for weeks, so I decided to listen in and hear what the team got onto when they went to their missions and I was happy it was a success.
Then it moved onto Wanda asking how Coulson's week had been going, to which he explains that he'd been tracking a civilian he's been dealing with, who has some sort of abilities that made him special and somewhat dangerous.
'Is he a threat', Nat asks him and he shakes his head, 'No, yes, I mean, I don't know yet', he states and then puts the file on the table we were sat around and I pear up and the first thing I see is a picture of a man, one that I recognise.
'He's harmless', I state and everyone looks at me this time when Steve stops talking and I see Coulson's brows draw together.
'You know him', he asks and I nod, 'Mmm, his name is Steven and he works at a museum', I reply, 'he's a puppy dog, he doesn't hurt anyone', I add and then Coulson moves the pictures around and picks out one that he shows me, 'that's what he did', he tells me when I see bodies on the floor and blood everywhere, 'do you want to change your mind now', he says when I'm confused and look back at him, 'not really', I said and stand up to leave.
'Where are you going', Coulson asks.
'To the museum', I reply and take my jacket off of the chair, 'take the team, he could be dangerous', he says and I snap my eyes at him, 'he's not dangerous, he's a friend', I tell him protectively because Steven had become my first friend ever since I woke up and he understood some prospectives I was going through, so for someone to tell me he's dangerous, was ridiculous.
'Okay, just take them to tag along', he says and I sigh at him and walk out.
'No one touches him', I tell everyone first because I don't want him to get hurt.
________
I walked into apart of the gallery that Steven had his shop set up in and picked up a hippo and a pencil, then walked over to where the cashier point was and saw someone else behind it.
'Ah, the Goddess of fertility and childbirth', I heard over my shoulder and look behind me to see Steven walking over to me with a box and a smile on his face, 'that's Taweret', he says referring to the hippo in my hand and I look at him then the animal I had in my hand, 'we're you looking to buy it', he asks.
'I was going to use it as a conversation starter, but that's gone to shit', I said and he laughs whilst I put the items down and then I look at him, 'we need to talk', I tell him and he watches me, then his eyes drift to the team, one by one, then me.
''Let's go somewhere private', I tell him and he hesitantly puts the box down.
________
The cool breeze swept and breezed through my hair when we all stepped out onto the roof of the museum and the door clicking shut behind us.
'You want to tell me why you popped up on shields radar', I ask him first and watch him turn to me with the furrow of his brows, 'what radar, and since when was shield still operating', he asks.
'Since always', I reply to him, 'so why did you', I ask and he's silent, 'if your in trouble Steven, you should have come to me', I tell him and he sighs.
'It wasn't me', he states and then I scoff, 'tell me that when there isn't evidence stacked up against you and, oh yes, the photos and videos I've seen', I start, but he interrupts me.
'I'm telling you the truth, it wasn't me', he says in his annoyed British voice and I know he's telling me the truth, 'then who was it then', I ask, then hear a howl in the distance.
'You wouldn't understand', he begins with a sigh, 'try me', I cut him off and there's another howl, this time a little more closer, which draws his attention, and he looks over to the other end of the roof, 'you should go', he says without answering my questions and I'm getting annoyed this time, 'you don't talk to me, I'll be forced to bring you in', I said and he turns to me again, 'I don't want to do that, so just answer the questions I ask', I said because the last thing I want is to bring him into an interrogation room where it'll overstimulate him and it'll be a whole problem of calming him down and trying to get through to him, he was my friend, and I didn't to put him in that position.
Before he could answer or give me any sort of response, there was another howl, this time it was closer, more aggressive and even more vicious that it grabbed all our attention and we stand to attention.
'What is it', Nat asks and I draw my dagger out, 'and the better question, where is it', Sam says whilst we're all staring and trying to find anything that stands out in the dark.
Then out of nowhere, a shadow appears in the night, but it wasn't something that attacked us, instead the figure protected us and fought whatever we couldn't see.
Then there was a lot of grunting, whimpering and then a sharp sound that when the figure stilled, we're all looking at the dead animal, something that I had never even seen before and was sure it was out of this world.
The next thing that grabbed my attention was the figure and we're all watching them pull out the crescent darts that had been used to kill the beast, which he then attaches back to his chest and I'm eyeing the suit they wore, which was an all white hooded top, and a mummy like wrapping on most of their body.
'Who are you', Wanda breaks the silence and then they step away from the dead creature and after a moment of staring at us, the suit disappears, 'Steven', I said surprised and he looks at me like he doesn't know me at all.
'I'm Marc', he introduces and his British accent has disappeared, 'Steven has a twin', I ask confused because he didn't mention that to me and when I look over to where he was standing, he had disappeared from our side, which I hadn't even noticed.
'Where is he', I ask and look around, because this whole situation would have freaked him out and I know how he is around scary situations.
'I'm not Stevens twin', Marc tells me and draws my attention back to him, then after two beats his head falls back and his eyes fall to the back of his head and he's surrendered some sort of control where his eyes roll back and he stares at us, confused, then moves his eyes to the dead animal beside him, which makes him jump back, 'oh my god, dead Jackal, dead Jackal, dead Jackal', he says in his usual British panicked voice and we're all staring at him, surprised and a little curious and confused, 'Steven', I call out to him, but he's still freaking out, 'holy shit, there's so much blood', he tells himself, 'Ahhh, I killed a jackal, I killed a fricken Jackal', he states and runs a hand over his head, then his eyes fall back.
'You didn't kill it, I did', the British accents drops, 'stop being a baby and freaking out', he says then his eyes fall back again.
'I will freak out as much as I want, I told you not to kill anyone', he says and the same thing happens again.
'Hey, I protected your ass, be grateful the thing didn't kill you and your friends', he states.
'Your on time out, I don't care, your staying in this time', Steven says and I'm signing to myself.
'Steven', I try again and this time it draws his attention and he looks at me, 'what is going on', I ask and then he explains everything in detail, from the beginning to the end.
'Marc isn't my twin, he's someone inside me that takes control when he needs to protect me from danger', he says.
'So, he's living in your head', I ask.
'Not exactly, I'm living in his, he just lets me have most of the control and only comes out to protect me or someone else', he replies, 'Marc is the main mind and body, he just created me in response to his trauma', he says, and I stop myself from asking because it wasn't any of my business to ask what that trauma was.
'So your not a villain', I said and he stares at me, 'I hope your joking', he says.
'What do you expect me to think, you didn't mention anything like this the last we saw each other', I said and he nods, 'I know, it was all sudden and a little to overwhelming that it just took time to process and for me and Marc to work on agreements we were comfortable with', he states and I'm asking questions that feed my curiosity.
________
'Ooh, guess what, I'm going to Egypt', Steven tells me with his eyes lit up and a wide smile, 'it's going to be so fun', he says and before I could give him a response, his demeanour changes and his shoulders are in a straight line, 'we're not going there for your entertainment, it's for surveillance and work', Marc tells him and Steven appears again, 'we can have fun afterwards, it'll be great', he says.
'No', Marc gives him a simple answer.
'Yes, and if you don't I'm telling Layla', Steven tells him and Marc scoffs, 'you talk to my wife or even look at her, I'm going to kill you', he threatens him and I'm watching their interaction dear in headlights because I have no idea how this works and it's still confusing to me.
I then get out of thought when Marc takes control for a split second and punches Steven in the face which makes him groan, 'ow, why would you punch me', he says.
'Because your not going on a date with my wife, you do it, I'll make sure you disappear for good', he says and then Steven punches him which makes Marc groan, 'are you fucking...', Marc begins to grumble when Steven takes control, 'yes, you punched me first, didn't feel good did it', he says.
'I see you boys are at it again', I heard and look over to a young women with curly black hair that fell above her hazel eyes and takes a seat beside Steven, 'what's going on now', she asks, then takes his burger and eats it, 'Marc punched me so I punched him back', Steven tells her.
'Good on you, you need to stand up for yourself Steven, don't let him push you around anymore', she says and then takes another bite and he watches her, 'that was my burger', he says and she stares at him, 'mmm, it's very good, tasty too', she tells him.
'I'll have that back please', he says and then takes the bun off of her and eats it himself, 'I'm getting good at standing up for myself', he states and she smiles and then looks at us, 'who are your friends', she asks him, 'that's Y/n, the one I talked about last time', he introduces and I give her a small smile, 'and the team she joined', he adds and they're all introducing themselves.
'Oh yes, the famous avengers, heard so much', Layla says with admiration and then gets to know the team, whilst I clamp my hand shut and dig my nails into the palms of my hands, because I was getting tired and sleepy and I couldn't afford to sleep right now, I'd only lose control and I didn't want that, so I let myself focus on the pain.
________
I jumped awake in my seat, and move my eyes around the room to see some normality, but instead lock eyes with everyone in the room, who were all watching me.
'Y/n', Coulson calls out through the buzz in my ears and I look over at him to see worry etched in his brows, 'I'm okay', I tell him, 'I just fell asleep for a second', I add and he's watching me, 'you weren't asleep', he says and I'm confused until I follow his eyes to the book I was holding and the writing I had scribbled into the pages.
Wake Up.
It reads across the entire page and I snap it shut, fuck, I tell myself.
'When's the last time you got any good sleep', Coulson asks this time and I sigh to myself, 'I can't sleep', I reply and look at him to see even more of his worry, 'how many hours have you gotten this past week', he questions this time.
'Collectively, Ten', I reply and he nods, 'ten hours isn't too bad', he begins but the look on his face tells me all I need to know for me not to correct him, 'ten minutes', he says and I stay quiet, 'I don't need sleep', I tell him, 'I can't afford to sleep right now', I add.
'Yes you can', he says and I can tell by the tone in his voice that he's mad, 'this whole week, or the month', he asks and I know lying to him will only cause a fight and I didn't have the energy for that right now, 'since I got here', I respond and everyone's watching me this time.
'Your off missions until you rest up', Coulson says next and I snap him a look, but before I could say anything, or argue my case, he stops me, 'arguing with me will only make it worse', he states and I sigh my frustration.
'Get some rest, preferably eight to ten hours', he instructs.
'Five max, I don't have my pillow to sleep that long', I state and reason with him, 'where's your pillow', he asks.
'I left it at the compound, in my bedroom, it's the only thing I forgot to pick up', I said.
'I'll send it to you', he says and I nod whilst becoming grateful, because every pillow I've tried hasn't compared to the one I used to have, so Coulson sending it back to me, was more then nice of him.