The letter that greeted me the next morning was not from my father like I expected, but from Mason.
Meet me in the courtyard. We need to talk
It was delivered when Estelle was getting breakfast, and just before she walked back into the room I shoved it in my pillowcase, sitting casually back at the table when she arrived with the food.
'At least it is now edible food' she had taken a Nadoran tray from the kitchen. 'Estelle, surely they would see that you had taken food meant for the Nadoran guests?'
After the Queens comments last night I was not too worried, but Estelle did not know that and she was behaving carelessly.
'No one noticed, it will be fine. I can just fein confusion'
Estelle was acting cold toward me and the tension remained, but I could not think about that now, instead I had to ask her about what had happened last night.
'I finally met the guard you told me about, Elias?'
She dropped the food from her hand as I watched her face burn bright red and her mouth open and close. 'You have seen him?' She whispered.
I looked around the room confused, but nodded 'Why are we whispering?'
The cautious Estelle that had trained me so thoroughly was definitely back. She gestured for me to scoot closer to her. 'He is... we are...' she couldn't finish her sentence. She jumped up and an uncharacteristic look of fear crossed her face. 'Nothing, Eve. Nothing'
I eyed her, noting the way her face had shut down from showing any emotion. 'What is going on?' I stopped whispering, too frustrated at her evasiveness to care about being quiet.
'I can not tell you Eve... because of who you are, and the rules it would break if you had to keep my secret'
Understanding dawned on me. As spies we were required to report and misbehaviour amongst the ranks to our master. My father believed it was effective in keeping his soldiers in line, but really it bred mistrust within the spies and meant that there was always a fear that someone would report you.
Looking at the response on Estelles face led me to the conclusion that she and Elias had feelings for each other. This had never been a problem before seeing as Estelle and I were the first female soldiers and spies, but Estelle knew as well as I did that my Father would never approve of two soldiers marrying each other.
'Estelle, I could never betray your trust. You are more than a friend to me, you are my family. If you have... feelings... for someone, then I want you to share that with me. No code is more important than our relationship'
She looked at me blankly 'I didn't think I could tell you. I thought you would tell your father'
'I would never. My loyalty to him is as a soldier, but it is to you as a sister'
The tear rolling down her face was the strangest thing I had ever seen so I walked over and wrapped her in a hug.
'I love him Eve, so much' her voice was muffled against my shoulder while she cried. I rubbed her back to soothe her, not quite knowing what to say.
After a few minutes she stood back with a deep breath. 'I am sorry, it is just such a relief to tell someone after all this time'
We sat back down at the table and picked at the food while we talked 'All this time? How long has this been going on?'
She was sheepish now 'About 4 years?'
My jaw dropping in shock prompted her to laugh and wipe her eyes.
'You have been in love with this man for four years and you've never said anything to me!'
'I've never said anything to anyone,' she admitted 'We had only just noticed each other when he was told he would be stationed as a spy here in Corisan. He has only come back to Nadora once. But we write letters, and he has said he wants to marry me'
It was like a whole new person was sitting in front of me. The huge smily on Estelle's face had a glowing quality to it, probably from the thoughts of marrying the man of her dreams.
'He was kind to me last night, and he has beautiful eyes' She grinned but from my face she could see that I was keeping something from her. I guess it was time for confessions.
'Last night Mason followed me out onto the Balcony and we fought but then we... kissed?' I covered my face with my hands, hearing her gasp. I couldn't look at her so I continued as quickly as I could get the words out, 'Then the King and my father came out onto the balcony and caught us' - another gasp made me wince but still she said nothing.
'And then Mason was sent back into the ballroom, and the Queen came out and rescued me from a definite dressing down'
She ignored my approval of her beau and instead stared at me in horror.
I fell to the ground and kneeled in front of her, 'It was just a kiss Estelle, it did not mean anything'
The silence was overwhelming but I sat back and waiting for her reaction. I did not expect that she would start to cry again, tears falling down her face.
'You are in danger' she whispered shakily. It was not an accusation, it was a statement. Even though I was scared myself, I held her hand and waited for her to calm down.
My thoughts jumped guiltily to the note I had hidden in my pillowcase from Mason, asking to meet. In that moment I made up my mind that I would not go and talk to him. The fear emanating from Estelle was palpable, and she didn't deserve to be put through anything just because of a little mistake on my part. No, I would not see Mason today.
'I will go to my Father soon Estelle, I will explain everything and hope that he will pardon my mistakes. I will prove my loyalty to Nadora' I said the words even as my heart whispered the doubts I had.
She nodded tearily, but we both knew that anything I said to him would be futile. My fate would all come down to his mood.
———————————————————————————————————————-
In the afternoon I looked for Elias. Aria asked me to come sit in the drawing room with the Queen and the princesses, but I did not wish to speak about the incident with Caleb yet, it was up to her to solve the issue. I was too caught up in what everyone kept implying, that Mason might have matrimonial intentions toward me.
I brushed off the thought, no matter how incredible, and focused on the task at hand, finding Elias. Luckily, or perhaps unluckily for me, Elias was searching for me as well. He found me in the library and handed me a note with an apologetic smile.
My chambers. Now.
Well, there could be no doubt who the note was from. I followed Elias as he walked down a bunch of corridors, coming to a stop at a dead end wall. Before I could ask what he was doing he made sure no one was around, then pushed a stone, revealing a door.
'I didn't know there were hidden corridors here'
He shrugged off my comment and gestured me inside quickly, shutting the door behind us. 'This way' he grabbed a lamp from the floor beside the door and lit it with a flint from his pocket. The glow led the way down the dark halls.
'This corridor used to be used to sneak out visiting dignitaries in case of an attack' he explained, 'We should come to the Kings chambers soon' I nodded and watched the man walking before me. I knew that Estelle wouldn't like me to say anything to him, so I held my tongue. But here in the glow I could see that his blonde hair and green eyes made him handsome.
We came to a stop in front of another wall but this one had a door handle. Elias pushed down to open it then stepped aside for me to walk through 'I will take you back to your room when you are ready'. I couldn't get a single word in before he closed the door and shut off my only chance for escape.
I looked around and saw that I was in the waiting area of my Fathers wing. The decor was understated and classy. I could hear the ticking of a large clock and the rustling of papers in the adjoining room, so I knew I was not alone.
'Evelyn, enter'
His voice was in commander mode. I walked into his study and saluted him. Remaining in position until he nodded to release me.
'Last night proved to be... interesting' he commented, bringing his hands together in a knot. I waited, knowing that it wouldn't be my time to speak for a while. While I listened to him I took the rare opportunity to study him.
He had always been an intimidating man, not just because he was the King, but because of his sheer size. He was tall and lean but there was definitely muscle there. His face had grown thin in the past few years and it made his already-small eyes look even more out of place on his face.
Even if my mother and I did not get on, I was glad that I got her facial features, although looking at my fathers nose I could see the resemblance somewhat between us.
He rose from his chair and walked around the room, his easy gate deceiving. 'Estelle failed to inform me that the Princess of Proemysta was attending last nights ball, as did you'
I made no excuses because I knew he would not accept them. I only hoped that Estelles punishment would not be terrible.
'You asked me yesterday why I was here. Why do you think I am here?'
Having not anticipated speaking so quickly I stammered for a second before gathering my thoughts.
'Well, it has been reported that you have come to assist in brokering peace between the East and West of Corisan, but I know that peace is never your agenda'
He nodded at my perception and waited for me to go on.
'You have brought the entire army'
The thought of the Nadimi spy sitting in the dungeon nagged at me, and I knew this might be the only chance I had to question my Father in a place that he could not have me executed. At least not without raising some serious questions.
'And you sent a Nadimi to purposefully miss in an assassination attempt on the Crown Prince' the words fell out quickly and I watched him for a reaction.
He smiled and tapped a finger on the desk 'I have always said you had a good understanding of strategy. And it seems that I have underestimated your perception and deductive skills. How did you know about the Nadimi?'
'I visited him in the prisons. He spoke to me in ancient Nador'
He nodded as he sat down. Leaning back in his chair, he thought out loud 'The Nadimi was mostly so that William would fear for his Son and subjects lives and ask for help. It is fortunate that it threw you into the path of the Crown Prince. Two birds with one stone'
The hair on the back of my neck stood up as I realised what he was saying, and what he might have seen. 'No it is not like that, the Prince and I...' my objection was cut short by my father standing with a glare on his face.
'Do not lie to me, girl. Anyone with eyes can see that the Prince has feelings for you. Last nights little conversation with the Queen confirmed that. I had assumed you had some sort of plan, otherwise why would you have let yourself be caught out on the balcony in a compromising position like that?'
He knew he had me there. If I admitted to having feelings for Mason it was as good as admitting to treason, and the likelihood of being put to death rose significantly. So even though I had definitely not intended on being discovered kissing Mason, I had to act like it was my plan.
'You are wrong, and even if the Prince did have feelings for me, the King made it pretty clear last night that he does not approve of that kind of relationship between the Prince and I'
He looked at me with a cruel smile.
'And yet William told me last night that he was pleased that Mason was opening up to someone. He has been waiting for his son to develop feelings for anyone. He doesn't care that you are not royal!'
The King was not mad? The small amount of joy I felt by his approval was quashed by the sarcastic smirk from my father 'Since he has no objections to you, I think this will give us an advantage'
'But how? It does not matter if Mason has feelings for me, that does not benefit Nadora if he doesn't know that's where I am from. He will think he is aligning with Luridia'
'Once you are married it will not matter'
'Married?!' I stood up with no attempt to hide my horror, 'Father, no! I cannot marry him' a withering glare replaced his smirk at my familiarity with him. 'You can marry him, and you WILL because I order you to'
My legs trembled even as I tried to hold my ground 'If I marry him and then am taken away, I will be ruined! I will never be able to marry again' I could not comprehend the position that my father's plan would put me in.
'That does not matter. You have no reason to marry, and even if you did, your mother has insisted that no one know you are her child and so you have no dowry. You are a soldier and that is all you will ever be'
There was no hint of compassion or mercy. He was angry and tired of the discussion. His words stopped me in the middle of my protest.
He stood up again and gestured for me to stand from my chair. My chair gave a small squeak as I pushed it back and stood in front of his desk, eyes ahead, back rigid, the automatic pose of a soldier waiting for orders.
'You are to convince the Prince you are in love with him. Then when he asks you to marry him you will accept and once you are married I will take over. If you do not accept these orders the army that I have brought with me will engage in an occupation of Corisan and the deaths of the royal family will be on your head'
The threat hung in the air and I felt the floor fall away from beneath my feet. With his army here he could make good on that threat. Only once he was gone did I let myself crumble back onto the seat beside me, feeling the punch to the gut.
I had never outwardly questioned orders, I had always been a loyal soldier. But deceiving Mason, Aria and the whole royal family in order for my father to take over Corisan? My stomach felt ill at the thought that if I refused the outcome would be even worse.
Elias walked me back to my room, completely silent beside me and allowing me time to think. As much as I wanted to come up with a solution, my brain felt muddled and tired. There was simply no way out of my fathers orders, and a very small part of me was still holding onto the fact that the neither the King or Queen objected to Mason and I's relationship. Although I was sure that if they knew the whole truth, that would not be the case.