Tension between Estelle and I simmered below the surface, but over the next week the palace began to feel lighter, despite the heavier military presence in the castle. There were a few soldiers from Nadora that I recognised, but either they had been briefed, or they did not see me behind all the dresses and jewels I was wearing.
Just two days after my Father had arrived, the King was able to announce the dismantling of the western border dissenters. Aria had been elated at the news, but I could see the hesitation behind Masons smile.
The rule with my Father had always been that if he wanted to speak to you, he would find you, and I knew that was no different now. Since he made no attempt to approach me, I simply continued on with what I had been doing, listening and learning, and waiting for when he would strike. I was comfortable that while he was here, another attack on Mason or Aria would be unlikely. I wished I could assure Aria of that since she was still on edge but I stayed quiet.
With my Father around, I began to feel more uncomfortable in what I was doing, starting to see it through an outsiders eyes. I told myself again and again that this was what I was here for, and what I had been trained to do, but I was finding it harder to believe in the mission when I was growing more unsure about what the mission actually was.
After the queens confession of why the two Kingdoms had been fighting, the already waning trust I had in my father seemed even weaker. When we were in a room together I found myself watching him, looking for signs of malice or deceit. If I knew him better I might have been able to see them, but he was someone I could not read no matter how hard I tried.
On the warmest day I had encountered since coming to Corisan, I found myself sitting in the training courtyard. All the soldiers were out riding for the day, practising their skills, and I took the opportunity to sit on a small bench that was in the sun without being disturbed.
With eyes closed my head rose up to face the sun automatically and I breathed in the scent that carried on the warm breeze.
'I didn't think ladies liked to sit in the sun'
I crinkled my nose but made no other move 'Perhaps I am not a lady'
Masons chuckle was closer than expected and I opened my eyes to see that he was leaning on a column a few paces in front of me. His face was neutral but there was a smile in his eyes.
'Do you mind if I sit then, oh peasant one' the joke was terrible.
I moved over on the bench to allow him enough room. He pulled himself up from the support and strode forward, taking the seat beside me. He was close enough to touch.
'Why are you sitting out here, in the heat?'
'I have not felt the sun in weeks,' I closed my eyes and tilted my head back up to face the rays 'and I have missed it very much'
'It has not been that long' I held my hand up to stop him from speaking any further 'A day without the sun is a day too long'
He was quiet for a beat and I sensed him watching me.
'I have to tell you something' the lightness of his tone had changed, he sounded hesitant.
My eyes slowly opened and I shifted so that I could see him clearly. He was wearing unadorned garments, and it was nice to see his clothing a little relaxed, even if his face was tense. I waited for him to continue speaking.
'Now that the East and the West are cooperating, and Father and King Fitzcharles are in peace talks, Mother told me today that she has already written to request the presence of the foreign Princesses, and that it is time I find a wife. They will be arriving soon' the words came out quickly then he glanced at me from the side to see my reaction.
Inside my chest, I felt like my heart had been battered, but I schooled my features to remain pleasant 'I am sure she knows the best timing for these things'
Now Mason turned to face me properly and stared at me.
'You think it is a good idea?'
This was not the time to falter, so I went on with a confidence that I didn't feel.
'Well if you want to ascend to the thrown one day, you cannot be unmarried. So yes, I think its a good idea'
When I finally made eye contact, I had to look away. The emotion behind his eyes was familiar and consuming. He stood from the bench and stepped away, a mask shuttering over his face to hide the previous emotions and he turned his back to me.
Seeing my chance to escape I stood to slink off in the other direction, desperate for a private place to process the possibility that my feelings were running away from my control. But as I lifted my head, I saw Mason turn back to face me.
His expression was a terrifying mix of anger and resolve. He stepped forward with purpose, and I stepped backward in response. In five steps he had me cornered against a column and his arms came to either side of my head so that it felt like he surrounded me. 'We keep finding ourselves in this position' I attempted to joke.
All thoughts joking or trying to escape from his body barricade fled my mind when I met his eyes. It felt like I was drowning in a sea of green and gold.
'Do you really think it's a good idea?' He repeated. I tried to utter an excuse but he was too close, and I was lost.
His face was inches from mine, and his gaze darted from my eyes to my lips, causing me to lick them unconsciously.
'Mason...'
It was barely a whispered warning but he cut it off by gently pressing his lips against mine, my eyes falling shut at the first touch. My heart stuttered then took off as the kiss deepened. His hands came up to cup my face and he pressed me against the column, consuming all my space, drawing me in.
I surrendered to the feelings raging inside me at the feel of his kiss, so focused and intent, like he was trying to discover me, looking for answers to questions I didn't want to be asked.
Fear overtook my brain and the palms I had unknowingly rested on his chest clenched into a fist, pushing him away as I fought to protect myself. I missed the warmth of his body against me almost instantly. I stared at him incredulously, and he looked back at me with dark eyes, his breathing uneven.
'Why did you do that?' The words didn't come out as strong as I had intended, but I ignored the tremor and focused my attention on his eyes.
Mason, on the other hand, was having more trouble getting his breathe back than I was and kept glancing down at my lips every few seconds. 'Because I got tired of waiting, and I could not stop myself anymore'. The admission both scared and thrilled me, and part of me to step forward into his arms again, but I remembered who I was.
With a deep breath I moved away from the column and out of reach of his arms 'That cannot happen again' I whispered, looking around to make sure no one had seen us. Even without Estelle and my father here, I had to assume he had spies that I knew nothing about.
Mason stood his ground and his eyes remained locked on me, 'I think you wanted that to happen almost as much as I did' his confidence returned with his breath 'And I think that you felt the same thing I did'
My cheeks burned with horror as I realised what I had just done, I had ignored all my instinct in that moment for something that I selfishly and stupidly wanted. In doing so I had put not just myself but Mason at risk. My stomach churned at the thought that my father could find out what I had just done, no matter who had kissed who, I would be considered a traitor.
'Woah woah, where did you just go?' Mason held his hands up to bring me back down to earth and I blinked through the blank stare until his handsome face was in focus again.
I couldn't admit that I didn't know what to do now. When he saw my expression he sighed and came toward me again but this time he simply pulled me in for a hug, no trace of bravado on his face. He was gentle but held me firmly to settle me.
The sound of his heart beating beside my ear calmed me. While my pulse was going wild, his was steady and I leant into him, ignoring the warning bells in my brain telling me to run in favour for the sense of peace his presence washed over me. He quietly stroked my back and didn't say a word, letting me process everything.
'It was just a kiss Eve' his tone was light and joking, but his concern came through. There was no way I could tell him that technically I had just committed treason. Gathering my thoughts I subtly inhaled his scent one last time, like sunshine and dusty books, he smelt like the library.
I leant back and resisted my guard going all the way back up. 'That can't happen again' my words were more insistent this time, hoping he understood the emphasis. He studied my face, looking for something that he wasn't going to get. 'I thought that ... but it does not matter' I could see he was frustrated as he released me and stepped back. An awkwardness settled over us as the warm sun disappeared behind a cloud.
'You should go, you will have to prepare for the arrival of the Princesses' the words I uttered put the barrier back between us, hopefully for good this time.
His back was rigid as he turned to walk away, and this time he kept on going into the castle, not looking back.
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This was the chapter that literally gave me butterflies to write!!
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