Full disclosure: I know nothing about athletes or track or what locker rooms are like.
CW: sex between consenting adults
I'm giving you a nice, warm and fuzzy chapter because the one after this is a doozy. After that things will slowly get better for a while... then a lot better for a while. Then there will be a big sad moment. Then the happy ending. It may take a while because the chapters just keep on coming.
Thanks for all the comments, it really makes all the procrastination I'm doing with the rest of my life so that I can write this feel worthwhile lol
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A gentle breeze ruffled Casey's hair, blowing the tiny wisps not secured by her small ponytail against her forehead. The field was silent and the only sounds she could hear was the scrape-scrape of the other athletes lining up their cleats as they got into position. The morning light was bright and crisp, the sun not yet as overbearing and blazing as it would be by the afternoon. In the distance a bird called. Her fingertips steepled against the ground as she breathed in and out, a deeply steadying breath. She could feel Izzie three places to her right and knew she would be crouching in her own starting position, her powerful leg muscles flexing in anticipation, that familiar look of intense focus on her face. Casey imagined that she could feel their connection, giving her strength.
This was the biggest meet they'd had since starting at UCLA a couple months prior. At first her performance had been the best it's ever been. Everyone on the team loved her and their coach smiled at her with a look of satisfaction at the end of every practice. Izzie had also fit right in, knowing, as usual, exactly what to say and do to endear people to her and, at times, to keep them in their place. Of course they were both still low in the hierarchy as freshmen, but gradually they were proving themselves. And their older teammates were starting to take notice. To invite them to parties and out for pizza. To include them on group text threads.
But as time wore on the meets had become more competitive and as everyone's expectation that Casey perform her best every time had increased, so had her anxiety.
At their last practice Casey had made one mistake after another, her irritation and erraticness slowly affecting the whole team until Coach had yelled, "Get your head in the game or get off my field Gardner!"
Frustrated and angry with herself and the world she'd stormed off the field and into the locker room kicking a wall and practically ripping her locker door off the hinges as she opened it. The room had been tense.
"Jeez, get it together," one of their teammates had muttered.
And another had said, annoyed, "Hope you do better than that at the meet Gardner."
Casey had glared at her, as if daring her to say more, but then Izzie had been there saying, "Ok, ok, back off guys. Leave her alone. We all have bad days."
Izzie put her body between Casey and the other girls until they turned to their own lockers and conversations. Casey sank onto the bench, beginning to remove her shoes in a huff. Izzie turned and rested a firm hand on Casey's shoulder, squeezing slightly. She didn't say anything, knowing from experience that Casey would not be capable of talking right now. Eventually she sat down to take her own shoes off. Wordlessly Casey got up and headed toward the showers.
The warm water hitting her face and body was calming and centering but she could still feel the irritating fluttering in her chest and the tingling in her arms and legs... the difficulty breathing. The panic. God, it was everything she'd feared. Failing. Choking. Being so close to success and then blowing it. It was happening. She swallowed and tried to empty her mind. She listened to the sounds of the other girls as they laughed and talked, quickly showering, dressing and leaving for breakfast or classes. She already knew she would not be eating breakfast. She wondered if Izzie would wait for her or know to give her space. In her current state of mind it was hard to care.
Suddenly she heard the sound of the shower curtain swishing against the floor. She spun to see Izzie, hair damp and body wrapped in a towel closing the curtain behind her. Casey stared at her.
"What are you doing?" Casey asked, wide eyed.
Izzie smiled hesitantly, unwrapped her towel and Casey watched the muscles under her naked skin ripple as she tossed it over the curtain rod. A little zap of electricity shot through Casey. Izzie's damp hair clung to her neck and snaked over her delicate collar bones. She bit her lip and smiled, making it clear what she had in mind.
"No," Casey whispered, harshly, in alarm, "No way. There are other people here!"
"Everyone's gone," Izzie said nonchalantly, coming closer, "you've been in here forever."
Izzie gently took one of Casey's hands. She reached up and brushed a lock of hair off Casey's forehead with warm fingers. Casey wanted to tell her that this couldn't happen. That they would get caught, that she wasn't in the mood. But Izzie was in the stream of water now and it was forming small beads on her neck, trickling down her chest, around her breasts and off the tips of her nipples. They'd never been in the shower together before.
"You're the best athlete on the team," Izzie said quietly, "that's why they're giving you a hard time."
Casey shot her a look of disbelief.
"Ok," Izzie laughed, "except for Brooke. And maybe Tanya. But they're seniors Casey!"
Casey smiled, halfheartedly. There was a warm tingling between her legs that was getting harder to ignore with Izzie so close and so... naked. She sighed and brought her hand to Izzie's waist, letting her eyes slowly travel over her body and face... unhurried, unfocused, unintentional. Izzie's tenderness had calmed her frenzied anxiety enough to reveal the sadness and fear underneath it. She stared into Izzie's eyes, letting her feelings show, not hiding anything. Izzie's answering expression was all compassion and concern.
"It's gonna be ok," she said, cupping Casey's cheeks. Her voice was warm and encouraging.
Casey hung her head.
"It's just like... I don't know how to get out of my own head!" she groaned, looking up at the ceiling.
"I'm gonna choke at the meet, I know it," she said quietly.
Izzie dipped her head to make Casey meet her eyes.
"Ok. You're not gonna choke. You're gonna kick ass, like you always do."
Casey couldn't help but smile a little. Izzie's face was flushed from the steam of the shower and her dimples were dancing along with her speech. Her lips were slightly parted and her eyes... Her perfect eyes were caressing Casey's face with so much love, as if soaking in every detail, landing frequently on her mouth. They were so close now. Casey's hands rested on Izzie's hips, her thumbs stroking the skin there. But Izzie reached down and took her by the wrists, walking her back until she was pinned against the wall. Izzie's strong fingers gripped her wrists firmly, pushing them into the wall. The cool cement block of the wall felt good against the hot skin of Casey's back.
Izzie's face inched closer, as if about to kiss her, but then she paused, hovered there, so close to Casey's face that Casey could practically feel the energy rolling off Izzie's skin. Couldn't even focus on more than one small part of her face at a time. Izzie's eyes were still dancing over Casey's face and under her gaze Casey felt beautiful... handsome... desirable... strong. She felt like herself.
"And, I know how to get you out of your head," Izzie all but whispered, all traces of kidding gone.
Casey sighed out a breath, speechless... weak.
"We're gonna get caught," she said softly, and her wobbly voice made it sound more like a plea than a warning.
"We're not gonna get caught," Izzie said, voice gruff.
Then Izzie kissed her. Her lips were gentle and tender at first but quickly became firmer. Assertive. She pressed her body into Casey's, making her whimper and sigh at the contact. Izzie continued pinning Casey's wrists as she parted her lips with her tongue, licking into Casey's mouth, dominating her. Casey's knees were suddenly weak and she was grateful for the wall behind her. She leaned all her weight against it, widening her legs slightly as Izzie's thigh pressed in between them, pushing up into her. Casey moaned quietly, making Izzie smile into their kiss. Izzie's mouth slid down to her jaw, nipping at the skin there, then at her earlobe, then her neck.
"Fuck," Casey sighed, allowing her body to bear down against Izzie's thigh.
The sensation made a trail of delicious sparks erupt in her vagina and scatter outward, filling her whole pelvis with warmth. Izzie let go of one of her wrists to grip Casey's breast, squeezing roughly as she began to suck and knead at Casey's neck with her mouth. Casey moaned. A desperate, wanting sound. Izzie gripped her wrist more tightly as she moved Casey's hand up, pinning it next to her face. And finally, finally, her free hand reached down, her fingers sliding confidently into Casey's vulva, trailing fire.
Casey moaned, making Izzie say, "Shh, shhhh," smothering her sounds with a searing kiss as her fingers began to circle Casey's clit.
Casey's hips were moving now, twitching toward Izzie, trying to find a rhythm... her body too keyed up with anxiety and her sudden arousal to focus. In a small part of her mind she realized she was going to come really soon and that she would be powerless to control it or slow it down or modulate it in any way. Izzie slid two fingers into her making her moan into Izzie's mouth, her free hand slapping onto the bare skin of Izzie's back. Izzie began a fast paced thrusting, in and out, in and out, curling her fingers as she pulled out, her wet mouth sliding down to Casey's neck again. Casey tilted her head back against the wall, panting, her eyes desperately scanning the ceiling, trying to focus.
"Izzie," she whimpered.
In a distant part of her mind she wondered if Izzie's wrist would get tired, if their height difference made it easier for her. But Izzie's fingers were driving lightning bolts of pleasure into her, straight up through the middle of her body. And Izzie's mouth was melting a hole into her skin. And all the muscles in Casey's pelvis were clenching around the intense point of pleasure deep in her core. She was panting, moaning quietly, trembling. She was so close. So close but not quite there. She just needed a little more...
Izzie released Casey's other hand and slid her hand down so that her fingers could circle Casey's clit while her other hand fucked into her. Her arm muscles clenched from the effort. Casey cried out; a sound that was a gasp, moan and groan all rolled into one. She gripped Izzie's shoulders tightly for stability.
"I... I'm-"
Izzie's head snapped up, her dark eyes intense and focused. She sealed the hand that had been stroking Casey's clit tightly over Casey's mouth just in time to smother her loud moan. Izzie kept thrusting into her, pressing on Casey's clit with the heel of her hand. Casey's eyes clenched shut and her muscles bunched as the tsunami of pleasure broke and surged outward from her core, annihilating all other sensations. Emptying her mind completely. Izzie was whispering in her ear as she thrust firmly... Her voice soothing... her words unrecognizable to Casey's overwhelmed senses. Her hand was tight against Casey's mouth as Casey shook and whimpered through her orgasm. A warm tear rolled down Casey's cheek, lost in the spray from the shower. And as Casey's breathing slowed and the pleasure got less sharp... less forceful, she allowed herself to rest in the slowing waves of satisfaction, rocked along, safe and warm, her body buzzing. At some point Izzie slowed her rhythm, removing the hand from Casey's mouth. Then eventually she stopped. Sliding her fingers gently out. She carefully gripped Casey's sides, knowing that rubbing her skin would be too much stimulation just now. Silently they rested their faces together, Izzie nuzzling into Casey's cheek... then her neck, kissing her gently.
Finally, Casey pulled back and looked at her. Lethargic and weak. She caressed Izzie's cheeks and hair with her fingers. Izzie looked back at her with so much love. And in that moment Casey's wonder and devotion to her girlfriend was an overwhelming force that obliterated all other concerns. Because how bad could anything be when she had this beautiful person pressed up against her naked body with a look of abject adoration on her face?
Casey put her hands on either side of Izzie's face and kissed her, deeply, gratefully. As Izzie sank into her, smiling, Casey flipped them, pressing Izzie up against the wall. Sinking to her knees with worshipful devotion.
"Oh, you don't have to-"
But Izzie's words were abruptly cut off by a gasp as Casey buried her face in her girlfriend's pussy.
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Casey centers herself on the memory of that clarifying moment of healing in the shower as the starting gun fires and her body launches into space. And as she flies over the track, feeling as if her cleats barely even make contact with the ground, her mind is as open and clear as the morning sky. She crosses the finish line to the cheers and shouts of her team. Her body and Izzie's find each other through the commotion, weaving together in a hard embrace, sharing a joyful, smiling kiss.