I hope you enjoyyyy!!!
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Rrrring! Rrrring! Rrr—Click.
"Cooper."
I smiled at the familiar groan of my name and wrapped my finger with the telephone cord as I leaned against the wall. "Bryan..." I kept quiet for a moment, listening to his background noise—specifically trying to hear if anyone was with him. Footsteps confirmed that there was; I wondered whose they were as they echoed throughout the professor's classroom for a while, and upon them silencing, I asked Bryan: "Who are you with?"
"...Pardon?"
"Who's around you? I heard some footsteps... Is it Cameron?!"
"A student just dropped off a late paper, Cooper," the deep voice said simply.
"Mm. Alright," I said before inhaling deeply.
"Why did you call me?"
"I always call you," I tittered.
"Usually to talk about something. What is it today?"
"...I cheated on him today..." I mumbled, my small smile leaving my face. "I didn't mean to. I didn't want to. But she, she looked just like him..."
"When, and with who?"
"Today. This morning," I answered. "It was with a guard; her name is Grennich, Hailey..." I heard a pen being lifted and clicked before scribbling against a paper from the professor's line. I knew he'd report her and get her fired; I was fine with that. "She's taller than him but her face and haircut... She looks just like him...."
"How many times have you been intimate with her?"
"She's always giving me flirty eyes, Bryan. She bats her eyelashes exactly how he used to, and she mewls instruction when she's alone with me... She sounds nothing like him, so she's incredibly annoying. Even during sex—"
"I didn't ask how closely Grennich resembles Cameron. I asked how many times you've been intimate with her."
"She's touched and blown me a few times before we finally had sex today."
"How did your relationship with her start?"
"We're not in a relationship," I snapped. "She came onto me first. She kept batting her eyelashes, biting her lips, pushing out her chest, and checking me out. All I did was let her have a little fun on the job. There's no relationship betwe—"
"Okay. You say that you cheated on Cameron," Bryan mentioned. "But you also said that, when he visited you, he and Giorgi were together... Right?"
My jaw clicked as I rolled it, remembering that day; I never responded to the professor.
"Right... And you know that after you were locked up, he talked about the incident with a therapist and has come to realize that you're a horrible person."
I ground my teeth as Bryan went on.
"You raped him. You beat him. You strangled him, Cooper. You confessed all of this to me," he said.
"I never said I raped him."
"You said you had sex with him in a bathtub while he was incapable of moving or even speaking. That's rape," Bryan said, sounding furious. Both of us went quiet for a moment before a heavy sigh passed through the phone from his line. "Why do you talk about him as if you're dating when you know that he hates you? I mean— He hates you. You know that, don't you? You have to."
A smile tugged at my lips and I shrugged even though I knew the psychology teacher couldn't see me. "I'm manifesting, Bryan. Speaking what I want into existence," I said honestly. "I've been meditating, praying, and I've been begging the universe for him. He'll become mine again. Soon."
"And what if he doesn't?"
"He will."
"Why are you so sure?"
"Because I know he cares about me. He fought with Erin and myself everyday because he hated how manipulative she was with me. He didn't like how she said or did certain things to keep me wrapped around her finger. He cared about me enough to try to get me out of my toxic relationship."
"Cared," Professor Davis repeated. "Past tense. He doesn't care about you anymore, Cooper. And didn't you tell me that you realized he was manipulating you, shortly after being locked up? Guilt tripping? Using certain words and doing certain things to keep you focused on him?"
"But it's okay that he was doing it because his intentions were good. He wanted me to be happy and move on from my mom."
Bryan merely sighed again and I could tell he had scratched his beard from the dry, rustling sound it made through the phone. "You and Cameron are not dating."
He left a long, silent pause after that.
"You never were. You didn't cheat on him, he didn't cheat on you. You need to stop talking about him as if you two are currently a couple, or were ever one."
My face balled up into a frown but my lips stretched into a wide grin. "Why does it matter to you so much how I talk about him? He's just another one of your students, isn't he? You don't have any special kind of relationship with him, do you?"
"Although it's not any of your business, I do prefer talking to Cameron more than any of my other students. He's smart, he pays attention to my lessons, and he can keep up with my notes... And I like his clothing style... He bounces from business, casual, cozy, street, and some combinations of them all... It's always a surprise. I think it's very nice." The Professor said as if he were imagining Cameron and admiring the memories of his past outfits.
I felt slightly agitated and jealous that so many people were getting to see Cameron's style while I couldn't, but I reeled in my angry feelings upon reminding myself that he only wore thick sweaters that covered all of his scars. Nobody saw those, I had bet myself. Cameron was probably still super self-conscious about them. There was no reason for me to get so upset; his scars still belonged to me.
"What, you mean all the turtlenecks that he styles? He just wears them to cover up his failed attempts of suicide."
"I'm not talking about his turtlenecks at all, actually. He hardly wears them anymore—even as it gets colder," Bryan said as a matter of fact. "He wears more of his boyfriend's clothing than his own, really, as the year gets colder. Warmer days, he wears short sleeves, flannels, ripped jeans, and whatever clothes he likes from his boyfriend's closet."
"He..." I inhaled sharply and sighed, rubbing my forehead with the bottom of my palm. "He hates how he looks. He doesn't wear short sleeves. Why are you lying to me?"
"Two years you've been locked up," Bryan said simply. "Cameron's found freedom in your imprisonment. He's found himself, he's found love, and he's found a real best friend that cares about him, Cooper."
"Giorgi doesn't give a fuck about Cameron, Bryan. He's only pretending to like him because Cameron wanted me first. Giorgi's a whiny, sensitive little bitch with neglect problems. Because his parents never gave him the attention he wanted, he feels that he needs to get it from any and everybody else—and so he stole Cameron's attention and affection from me."
"You don't think you do the same? Seriously speaking?"
"No. I got plenty of attention from my mom. I was her favorite. Of course I didn't experience any neglect from her," I scoffed.
"No, Cooper. That was your sister that loved and favored you," Bryan said. "Your mother didn't pay you any mind. The only time she showed you any affection was when you were young or injured..."
I didn't remember that. I didn't want to.
"Cooper, why did you kill your sister? Do you remember?"
"I told you there was no reason. We were arguing over cookies or whatever, and I—"
"It was sushi, Cooper," Bryan snapped abruptly. "And I didn't ask you how. I asked why."
"I told you no reason."
"That's not true. Why did you kill your little sister?"
"...She was annoying."
"How was Piper annoying?"
I shrugged although I knew Bryan couldn't see me. "She was too bubbly all the time. No matter what, she was always happy—even when I was rude to her..."
"Like how?"
"With the sushi thing... I took pieces off her plate. I did it to make her upset...but she just let me take it. She didn't ask me to give any back, and I got frustrated. She was being stupid. She was smaller than me but I was taking her food and she looked happier every time I took more... I wanted her to get mad at me. She never was and I always wondered what she would look like, how she would sound, and what she would do when she was angry. So, I shoved a piece of sushi in her face. She was only shocked at first, not angry, so I did it again. Before I knew it, she was choking, and then she was dead."
Professor Davis was silent; only the slow stroking sounds against his beard made noise from his side of the call. I sighed as I played with the telephone cord, coiling and stretching it around my fingers.
"Because she wasn't your mother," Bryan began, "you couldn't accept your her love, care, and affection... You killed her because you were furious at the fact that she was a better mother to you than your actual one... And you hoped that after your mom found your sweet little sister dead, she'd take on Piper's role that was constantly admiring, loving, and taking care of you..."
"...Hahaha! Uh... What do you want me to say, Bryan," I chuckled. "You want me to— 'Oh, oh, yes! You're so right! Right on the nose with that one! Oh, wow, you're truly a genius!'? Haha! Bryan, she was just being annoying. We were kids and—"
"Piper was a kid, Cooper. You were her big brother—you were thirteen when you killed her."
"Well, that's an unreliable statement. Nobody remembers when that happened."
"Just because you're too heartless to remember your sisters death does not mean that nobody else remembers it or what happened. I remember, and I won't ever forget it."
"Yeah, okay," I tittered. "If you think I killed Piper because I hated how motherly she was, then why do you think I got with Erin? Erin was practically identical to my mom and acted like a mother, so why did I get with her? Why didn't I kill her? Can you figure that one out?"
"She was exactly what you wanted. A face identical to your mom's and the characteristics of a real, good mother. She nagged at you, yelled at you, scolded you, and loved you. Everything she said and did with you was always out of love, and although she meant it to be romantic, you were so unfamiliar to affection after Piper being dead for so long and your mother shunning you further out of her life as she grieved, you took all of Erin's love and thought it was motherly. And because you'd grown to love your fantasy mother, you struggled when it came time to break things off or recognize the bad in your relationship with Erin. You couldn't let go of this dream-version of your mom even though Erin annoyed you endlessly because she was your real-life fantasy."
I frowned up as I thought about how right he was about Erin. "Explain Cameron... Why do you think I love him so much?"
"Because he's everything you need. He's smart, he's caring, he's honest, he's nice, and he gets upset with you. He has some motherly characteristics that you need, but not enough features to remind you of your own real mom. He's his own person, with his own thoughts, and his own personality that don't revolve around pleasing you. He's not your neglectful mom, he's not your affectionate sister, and he's not your clingy fantasy-mom-girlfriend. He's different from anyone you've ever met. You feel complete with him because he shows you every emotion freely. And although you desperately crave a loving mother, you are already used to your mom's neglect and anger so, just like someone would go about quitting a drug, you decided to ease yourself away from Erin who showered you in motherly affection in order to happily accept Cameron's less intense doses of kindness and care."
"Huh..." I muttered, my cheeks burning as I reminisced about every smile, frown, and pout Cameron had shown me. He was the most beautiful, the most emotional, and the absolute most perfect human I'd ever met in my entire life.
I began wondering why I was in prison, and why Cameron was so angry with me. I'd told him that I needed him and loved him, I thought he'd be happy with my confession since he'd never had someone love him before... That entire month that I'd had him to myself, I made sure he knew I loved him and that everything I did was to show how much I did...but he always seemed so angry and sad.
"Why'd he try to break me away from Erin and make me single if he didn't really want to be with me...? I mean, I made sure that we only had each other. Erin ran away... I thought he'd be happy but he acted like he hated me the whole time. I mean, he kept trying to get me to bring Giorgi over and he kept asking about him... Why would he do that stuff if he wanted me to break up with Erin?"
"You were abusing him. It doesn't matter how long he was isolated from society or how much affection he was refused in his past. An idiot wouldn't want to stick around someone who strangles them for falling out of a bed, Cooper."
I rolled my eyes at the memory of the few times I'd choked Cameron for trying to leave me. He said that it was an accident each time he had gotten out of bed but I didn't believe him.
"Whatever. Tell him I said hi next time you see him and that I'll see him soon," I said, preparing to end the phone call. Just as I pulled the phone away from my ear Bryan had asked me my release date. A wide grin spread my lips and my cheeks warmed as I imagined Cameron's beautiful eyes meeting mine—wide and bewildered upon my meeting him again.
"Soon."
Click.
••••••••
I hope you enjoyedddd!!!
This was Cooper's POV, by the way, if you didn't catch on by the title or...the entire chapter...
Lol thanks for reading!
Catch you in the next one!❤️