Ever since Taeyeon exposed herself saying that she is Aera, Byeol has been taking any chances to speak to her. Not giving up, wanting to get close to her like they used to be. It's not that Taeyeon hates her, whenever she looks at Byeol she keeps on getting haunted by the voices of students from that day.
Along with how Byeol just watched her get bullied. She has been trying to see the good in Byeol but all the unwanted thoughts just overlap.
The girl constantly just pops out of nowhere whenever Taeyeon is alone attempting to speak. She hasn't been sitting with her at lunch anymore. As much as Taeyeon wanted to ask why she didn't want to get close with her because her nightmares may begin again.
Everyone was outside for their P.E lesson. Taeyeon on the other hand was washing her hands in the bathroom. She told the teacher beforehand so she was taking her time sorting her hair out before she leaves. As she was about to make a move, the cubicle door from behind opened revealing Byeol. Byeol's eyes widened in surprise to see Taeyeon. After her eyes fell on the girl she walked up washing her hands as well.
" Are you leaving now to go to the grounds? Let's walk together" She smiled friendly but only received an emotionless expression in return through the mirror.
Letting a heavy sigh she readied herself before talking. "Look Byeol... Can you stop acting like we are friends? We aren't the same as before. I have changed. I'm not the same girl from back then and I don't want to associate with anything from my past. Stop acting like you care!" Taeyeon lashed out. She tried to speak in a calm and collective manner but all the pent up emotions did not help.
Byeol's eyes shook, Taeyeon could see the fear in her eyes. She was petrified. Taeyeon furrowed her eyebrows in confusion if it was an act yet again or real. "Look, I'm not trying to be rude. But every single time I see you, I feel suffocated, all the memories and the things you all did to me keep on coming back."
"What do you mean Aera? All the things we did to you? What did I do to you? And why are saying that I should stop acting like I care? I do care about you !!" she didn't want to hold back either and had enough she shouted back.
"No you don't! I needed you back then. I lost everything. My mother, friends, reputation. Everyone in school was calling me names. Monster, murderer. They said that I should rot in prison and said I killed my own mother. I would never and you know that! You knew about everything I went through back then when my mum abused me and you were the only one I had left. The looks they gave me, pitying me and the hatred in their eyes.... I also saw it in you. The hatred !! You looked at me just like they did! I trusted you! You were my best friend Byeol and I needed you. You were the only one I had but you abandoned me.. Betrayed me!" She didn't know how to respond to that. It was as if she never expected any of those words from her because that's not how she remembered it.
They both stared at each other and suddenly tears fell from Taeyeon's eyes. "For goodness sake!" She wiped them away slowly.
Byeol couldn't say a word, she faced down to the floor... guilty taking over. Truth be told, she didn't know that's how Taeyeon felt at that time. Tears pricked her eyes as well. Taeyeon scoffed. She shook her head and walked out the toilet door not wanting to be there any longer.
She stepped out and turned left but bumped hard onto someone's chest. Without even looking up at who it may have been she froze.
No, Did they hear?
She slowly tilted her head up to see Jaemin standing in front of her. His stoic face staring back at her startled one.
Uncontrollably, their tears became heavy, blurring her view. Her body stiffened and muscles became rigid as anxiety built up in her body. A sudden coldness of dread hit her core, her voice trapped at the back of her throat plummeting down to her stomach. She had nothing to use as an excuse.
A warm hand brushed against her cheek. He dried her tears but they kept on falling. She let out an unstable breather before pushing his hand away. She didn't look back towards him and took large strides just to find another figure standing a few steps behind Jaemin.
Donghyuck looked at the girl, a disconcerted expression staring back at her.
No!! No!! Please, this is a nightmare! It can't be happening!
She avoided his gaze, walking past him in hope that he would leave her alone. Against her liking a hand clasped around her wrist "Yeon... are you ok?" Donghyuck asked softly, trying to not scare the vulnerable girl away.
Taeyeon turned her head to face him, tears still falling down her cheeks. Her eyes wandered between his eyes. She was partly shocked by how he looked at her. There wasn't the hatred that she was familiar with. He looked ...worried
She broke their eye contact and looked at Jaemin... he on the other hand had an unreadable expression. Taeyeon sighed and faced the ground "I need some time alone"
"But-"
"Please.. Hyuck..... Let go" she pleaded in desperation. Donghyuck unwillingly let go and watched her run down the hallway.
After she disappeared he turned to see Byeol step out the toilets. Without any thoughts, he marched towards her. The girl shook in fright when her orbs settled on their dark demeanour surrounding both Jaemin and Donghyuck.
Both glaring at her with disgust and hostility. Byeol couldn't say a word, she wanted to sprint but her feet were glued to the floor. Her muscles were tired and lost energy; they couldn't even lift a finger.
Donghyuck took a deep inhale "Be glad I don't hit girls. But mess with her again I won't hesitate to hurt you." he hissed out, venom dripping out his voice. With that said he left both Byeol and Jaemin alone.
"I told you not to sit with us at lunch or talk to her. I don't know where your confidence came from but if I ever see you even laying a finger on her, or making a stray tear roll from her eyes I will end you myself. This isn't a warning but a threat." His deep loathing voice sends shivers down her spine.
She let go of the breath she held as soon as he was out of her sight. Her feet glided towards the pale wall, dropping down onto the floor cuddling her knees towards her chest. Back against the wall.
"I'm sorry Aera.... I should've told you back then what really happened" she muttered while crying hard into her knees. Red and swollen.
↠
"She isn't here," donghyuck whispered to jaemin. After everything they witnessed they left to go back to their P.E lesson but taeyeon wasn't anywhere to be found. They didn't want to look for her because she seemed like she needed space but now it's last lesson as she isn't in the classroom at the moment. Both the boys were becoming worried. But Donghyuck was panicking, his legs bouncing up and down. Jaemin's fist was clenched hard, hitting his desk now and again rhythmically.
The lesson felt like hours and they were becoming stressed.
Taeyeon isn't the type of student to miss lessons but she didn't want to face them. Scared that news about her past may have fled across the school like wildfire so she has been hiding. She was on the way to the rooftop but was stopped by Cyrah who spotted her crying. The older girl immediately embraced and calmed down Taeyeon.
At this exact moment she was sitting in Cyrah's office sipping on some coffee.
"So what's wrong sweetheart?" Cyrah asked softly while rubbing circles on her back leaning her back on the couch. "Nothing really." Cyrah sighed and turned taeyeon's body towards her.
"I don't think it's nothing. Who made you cry? Was it a boy? Did he reject you?" the younger simply shook her head. "I can teach him a lesson for making a beautiful girl cry!" she bawled her fist and acted tough. Taeyeon smiled slightly. "You look so much better when you smile. Always smile .. ok?" Taeyeon nodded, sniffing a little.
"You know my job isn't only to treat wounds, it's looking after the students' health. That includes mental health. Let me be your personal therapist... what do you say?"
Taeyeon sighed and nodded. "Ok spill all your worries I will listen. Don't worry I will keep it all confidential." She promised the girl.
"I had a friend around 5 years ago. We were really close but then something happened and rumours spread around the school. The students turned against me. She wasn't beside me when I needed her the most. But I met her recently and she is acting like we have always been friends. Caring about me and I'm confused. Seeing her just reminds me of how badly I was treated back then" taeyeon held back the urge to scream out all her worries in case she says something that she would regret later. Her heart was pumping hard but mentally she controlled herself to stay calm and choose the correct words.
"When you said she wasn't beside you - what did she do which made you feel like wasn't there for you?"
"Everyone looked at me with hatred, and I saw that look in her eyes as well!"
"Taeyeon, that doesn't explain anything. It might have been a misunderstanding you know. You said that the whole school turned against you, when in that position you would be under an immense amount of stress and fear, you lose trust in everyone and all the peers around you.
You probably felt like you fell down a bottomless pit. In that kind of situation your brain may trick you. You didn't know who to believe and who not to because most of the majority weren't on your side. So you make judgments which can be unreasonable, you lose control of your mind and can go into depression.
So when you saw your friend you may have thought you saw hatred but when in reality it might be something else. You can't conclude what a person is thinking just by their facial expression. And you're telling me that she is acting like she cares about you, so maybe you judged the situation wrong back then. What if she actually didn't look at you with hatred? I mean that was the past. Think about the present, how she treats you now?"
Not getting a response Cyrah sighed and carried on.
"You said it was 5 years ago. You were 14, that's the age when you are having your puberty. You're exposed to mood swings and can't control emotions. I think maybe your anger and fear got ahead of you and you might've thought wrong about your friend. I'm only saying this because from what I hear from you she doesn't hate you, but instead still thinks of your friends. You should talk to her, and clear it out." she advised.
Taeyeon stared blank in space.
What if Cyrah is correct? I never talked about it with Byeol. I just ran away like a coward.
"Cyrah thank you" Taeyeon bowed. "It's ok.. It's my job. If you're ever feeling down or have any worries which may affect your mental health just pop here" she winked.
Taeyeon waved the older bye and left.
↠
"Ok you can pack your bags now!" It was the end of the day. Donghyuck and jaemin left immediately and went to the car park waiting for the girl.
"She isn't even picking up my call!" Donghyuck cried out, distraught. He has been calling her for the past 10 minutes but there has been no response. "She is alright isn't she?" he asked jaemin.
"She will be fine. She might be just avoiding us. As long as she reaches home safely it's all fine." They both left the school. She isn't picking their calls and they knew that she won't be coming back home with them.
Taeyeon left school and sat in a donut shop munching on the sweet savory food.
I'm such an idiot. The more I think about it .. it's my fault. I never heard what Byeol had to say. I just believed in what I saw back then.
Taeyeon felt anger rising in her bloodstream. Not anger towards Byeol but to herself for being so immature back then. She should've at least given a chance to hear the girl out.
After 1 hours of eating donuts and drinking her milk tea Taeyeon left to walk back home. She couldn't take the bus back as the last bus that goes towards the mansion has already left. She planned on walking home not wanting to call the boys. She wasn't complaining as she could lose some of the built up calories.
Probably the worst idea she ever made ...
This was a long chapter !!