*HEY GUYS, IT'S BEEN A WHILE! THIS CHAPTER MIGHT BE PRETTY DAMN LONG (when are my chapters not? lel) AND IT'S A FLASHBACK CHAPPY. HEH. THIS IS CONTINUING OFF FROM Chapter 22, SO IF YOU WANT SOME SLIGHT RECAP THEN YOU'RE FREE TO JOG YOUR MEMORY, SINCE IT'S BEEN SO LONG.
QUESTIONS!!:
-Referring to Wattpad, are you more of a reader or a writer, or are you both? (I'm more of a writer and it's hard for me to settle and read a book on here because I'm so jittery and compulsive when it comes to writing.)
-What instrument do you play or would like to play? (I play the violin. I would like to learn guitar, cello, piano and the ukulele, though!)
ENJOY THE EXTENDED CHAPTER (I think it's pretty long, but I'm so used to writing long chapters so IDEFK)!*
Stay Creepy, My Friends!~
Chapter 30
"Emily, darling, go help Frederick with the crops," Ruth demanded of me, "That man likes to carry more than he can so he doesn't go strolling out for the rest."
"Of course, Lady Ruth," I answered politely and dashed outside of the cottage. I hopped across the grass and towards the field where Frederick grew his crops. I leaped over a rabbit hole that was hidden with the growing grass around it. My feet have gotten stuck in that burrow once or twice. Frederick has had to tug me out of it every time. I quickly dodged a low hanging branch that has caught me on the forehead many times. Ruth has had to put bandages and place kisses on it it. My steps were careful as I avoided falling over where the ground dipped abruptly like a miniature cliff. I've gotten scrapes from that pesky dip. And last but not least, I made sure to avoid a flower that was nearly into bloom. I've trampled over its brethren over the months and it's been hard for more to grow. I've grown well acquainted with the area around the cozy cottage. My mind can wander all it wants and my feet will still take me to the right destination and have me make the right moves.
The field was visible up ahead and I ran out of the tree-line. I ran through aisles of wheat and lettuce and carrots to reach Frederick, who tended to the potatoes. He was plucking them out of the ground, one by one, with steady strong hands. He had baskets next to him and one was nearly filled with the potatoes. "Hello Lord Frederick," I said cheerfully. He flashed me a smile and removed his farmer's hat. He bowed his head and greeted, "Tis a pleasure to see you, Queen Emily! And to what do I owe your visit on this fine summer day?"
I giggled and said, "Lady Ruth sent me to help you bring in the crops."
"Ah, that is quite helpful," he remarked with a big smile. "I was just about to harvest the radishes. Would you mind getting your lovely hands dirty, my Queen?"
"Not at all, my Lord," I chimed and placed myself by the radishes, which was planted next to the potatoes. I began to dig softly at the dirt until I uncovered enough of the vegetable to pull them out without damaging myself or the food. Frederick taught me this. He also taught me how to care for crops. He has taught me a great number of things that come in handy every day. So has Ruth. I knew how to cook even before I met them but she has shown me new and more efficient techniques and she is currently teaching me how to sew. I've helped the couple bring in food, clothing, gifts and money for them. Frederick will be riding off to a town to sell most of the harvested crops in return for tools or other necessities. Ruth likes to make dresses and will also sell them to the fine ladies and young girls in the towns far from our cottage. She also makes other pieces of clothing, like suits for the men and fine vests for the boychiks. If I can master this sewing talent, then I'll be able to help Ruth and speed up business. They are a hardworking couple so it's fair that I take some of the responsibility off of their old shoulders.
"If we get the crops cleaned and packed today, will you be leaving tomorrow," I asked Frederick as I pulled out another ripe radish.
"Yes, indeed, Emily," the black man answered me.
"Please be careful, won't you," I pleaded, "it's summer and the weather can be unkind. As are the animals."
"I promise to be careful," Frederick assured me. "I'll come back with new things for you and Lady Ruth."
"Someday, will you be able to bring us chocolate," I asked. The old man turned to me with a smile. "A whole pound of it," he said. I beamed and my elated feelings increased. I have heard about chocolate but I've never had any and it's horribly expensive. Our business doesn't pay us much to buy such luxuries but Frederick is a man of keeping and if he promises he'll buy chocolate, then he will. Someday.
"All of the radishes are harvested," I announced jovially. Frederick checked my work and praised me. "Well done, Emily. That may be a new record."
"Do you believe so?" I laughed. I picked up the basket of radishes and placed it with the other full baskets of vegetables. "We're all done here," Frederick said and stood up on his feet. He towered over me and stacked one basket over the other, then he tied them together so they would hold. He tied more rope onto them and strapped them onto his shoulders. He did the same with one basket and placed it on my back for me to carry. The both of us grabbed baskets into our arms as well, though Frederick only had me carry one while he carries two. "Let me try another," I insisted.
"No can do, little one," he told me with a light chuckle, "your little head won't be able to peek over the second basket!"
And so we walked all the way back to the cottage, being wary of the minor traps nature set out for us. We reached the cottage and entered through the front door. Ruth came out of the kitchen and greeted our return with a smile. I ran up to the tall lady and held up the basket of radishes in my hands. "Look at this Lady Ruth! I picked all of them myself," I said.
She leaned over and marveled the basket. "My, how incredible! But, your hard work has come at a price, my Queen." She brushed my hair back and wiped her hand on my face. "Your face is filthy with dirt!"
She leaned away and I said, "Frederick tells me that this is the face that brings pride to the working man!"
"Yes, and it also brings a bath to the working man," Ruth jested and gave Frederick a playful glare. "Emily, hurry and put the baskets in storage and come to me so that you may wash up."
I quickly hurried along with Frederick to storage and had the harvested vegetables stay there until Frederick's trip tomorrow. I found Ruth again and she had me remove my dress and she splashed water onto me as I sat in a basin. "You will look lovely by the time dinner comes," she remarked as she scrubbed at my scalp. I smiled and played with the water.
I was cleaned up and no sign of dirt was left on me. Ruth gave me a clean dress and bloomers and I wore them instead of the dirtied pair. Frederick also washed briefly and he came out looking fresh and renewed. Ruth busied herself by preparing tonight's dinner while Frederick busied himself with one of his favorite hobbies. I left Ruth to her duties and visited Frederick in a private room. He sat at a chair, carving into a circular-like shaped piece of wood. I smiled at his work and scanned the rest of the room to see his finished beauties. Frederick likes to make masks in his spare time. It was a custom that his family and his culture shared. The masks had astonishing faces, some were happy, others were intimidating, and there were the few that did not have a distinct expression. They were all beautiful and they were special because Frederick created them by hand and by heart.
"What is your next piece, Lord Frederick," I asked him as I stood by his chair. He gave me a smile and responded with, "To be truthful, I don't know."
"How will you shape it if you do not know," I asked him, cocking my head to the side.
"I'll figure the design as I go," he said simply. I watched his hands go to work as he carefully carved into the light brown piece of wood. He was always so steady and precise with these things. I was shocked to see this as his hands can pull out the toughest weeds and have such calloused textures, yet he can create a beautiful piece of art with sheer perfection. "I know it will look amazing," I spoke. Frederick smiled and said, "I'm sure it will be. Especially because...you'll be the one to make it."
I stared at the black man with wide eyes. How could I possibly make a beautiful mask? I would ruin it! "You shouldn't entrust it with me," I said, "It would only become a pile of wood shavings!"
"I have faith in your skills, little one," he said as he places the piece of wood into my hands, "You are talented and far more educated than the average child. And, I cannot conjure up a design, no matter how hard I try. You are creative. I am sure you will make something wonderful."
I held the piece of wood to my chest and gave Frederick a determined mien. He allowed me to sit upon his lap as I planned out where I can carve. "You remember my teachings, yes?" He asked me and I nodded. "Be gentle and be patient," I quoted him. Frederick and I sat together as he went over everything with me again. I pictured what I wanted as I stared at the circular-like piece of wood. I carved a small dot as the center for the eye holes, in case if I forgot their memorized placement. Soon I was beginning the process of thinning out the wood so it could curve perfectly over one's face. Frederick watched over me to make sure I didn't hurt myself and to catch me if I ever neared a mistake.
Soon Ruth called us to the kitchen and I had to stop carving. Frederick and I entered the kitchen and found plates of a delicious meal on the table. "Thank you, Lady Ruth," I beamed and took my place at the table.
"You are most welcome, my Queen," Ruth chimed and sat down as well.
"I, too, am most thankful," Frederick chuckled and the two of them shared loving glances. I smiled at their love. It was a once-in-a-lifetime moment, to see something so beautiful. Society would be blessed to have their kind of love, but they also do not deserve it. All three of us sat at the table and we thanked the Lord for having any food to begin with. I always hold hands with Ruth and Frederick, despite that I have long since given up belief in any higher being. After everything I ever went through, there is no chance of there being a God for me. After the prayers were over and we began eating, memories of Father came rushing back to me. I tried to hide my reminiscence of him as I ate and savored my meal.
To this day, I never found out who took the musket-fire in the forest. I never found out if Father is still alive, permanently injured or long dead in the forest. But, I still remember his teachings, especially over the subject of there ever being a God. He never believed though he never pushed his ideas onto me. He allowed me to believe in a God for as long as I wanted and in whatever fashion I wanted. This hope and belief that I had was gradually crushed by the terrible acts of men who feared the unknown. There was a phrase that Father told me, the fifth time we had to flee from another cabin. We came back at the sign of first day light and the both of us stared at the burned wreckage that used to be a safe place. We lost precious things, things that cannot be replaced. "Emily," he had told me, "a man of science can still believe in a higher form, but when his existence is challenged by those of his own kind and his desperate prayers are answered with universal silence, is when he sees that no higher power will ever save him. Chaos is eternal, Emily. If there was a God, it wouldn't exist today." I lost something else that morning too. It wasn't another dress or a dear teddy or drawings of flowers and fields that I was oh so proud of. I lost something even more vital. I lost my faith.
"This food is delicious," I praised Ruth. She smiled at me and said, "Thank you, Emily. I'm glad to know that you enjoy it."
We finished dinner and Frederick announced that he would retire to bed as he had to get up very early to get a good start to the trip. I occupied myself with the mask that Frederick entrusted me with. I sat on the chair, dropping wood shaving as I carved and carved.
What are you planning to design?
Sam asked me and I smiled. "I'm not entirely sure, but I believe I'm making a good base," I answered.
It will be perfect.
"I hope so," I remarked.
It was completely dark outside and I was growing tired from the long day. I kept working my blade into the wood though my movements grew sluggish with every stroke. A yawn escaped my mouth and I rubbed my eyes to try and wipe away the sleep. Ruth came into the room after a long time of battling my exhaustion. "It's time for bed, my Queen," she said with a sweet ring in her voice. Sleep was tempting but I wanted to keep working at the mask. I tried to protest but my voice came out as feeble groans. Ruth gently took the blade and mask from my hands and set it aside. "Come along, little one," she said as she held my hand and walked me to my bedroom. It felt like an eternity before we arrived and she tucked me into bed. "Sleep well, Emily," she whispered against my forehead right before she placed a tender kiss. I managed a sleepy smile and watched with heavy eyes as Ruth sat with me and stroked my hair. Her soft hands relaxed me and I still fought my tiredness. Alas, I lost and so I was sent to a dream world.
...
When I awoke, the faint light of morning was seeping through the window by my bed. I shot out of my blanket and dashed out of my bedroom. I slipped my shoes on my feet and ran outside. I checked the wooden cart that awaited at the back of the cottage. Frederick hasn't even loaded it with the harvest. I still have some time then!
I paid a quick visit to the lone horse that was gated in the back with good intentions. "Good morning, Philip," I said to the fine creature as I pet his neck through the fence. He snorted briefly and I giggled. I backed away from Philip and swept my eyes over the area.
"Let's make something for Frederick before he leaves," I whispered into the air.
As you wish, Queen Emily.
Sam and I searched through the grasses around the cottage to find lovely flowers. I gathered the beauties in my dress and every so often Sam would carry one and drop it into the pile. "Let's get to work," I said after we gathered enough flowers. I asked for Sam to bring the baskets to the wagon so Frederick won't have to carry all of them. After all of the baskets were nearly placed into the cart, Sam and I twisted flowers together with gentle care and skill.
This is fun.
"Yes it is," I giggled and picked up another flower to combine with the others. Soon, an orange Sun was peeking above the trees and I finished just in time. The door to the cottage was opened and Frederick came outside, dressed for the trip. He spotted me immediately and a big smile spread across his face. "Good morning, Lord Frederick," I greeted kindly and waved my hand. He gave a curt bow and said, "Hello, my Queen. What are you doing outside at this hour?"
"I wanted to give you a proper farewell on your trip," I answered as I stood to my feet. I lifted up the object that Sam and I created and presented it to Frederick. His face lit up even more and he chuckled warm-heartedly. "It's gorgeous," he said as he marveled the crown of sweet scented flowers.
"Fit for a king," I chimed and he laughed. He removed his farmer's hat and let the flowers rest around the crown, fitting to it like a bond. "Do I look ravishing," he chortled and I giggled. "Lady Ruth would be pleased," I said.
"The harvest is already in the wagon so you can leave straight away," I said and pointed to the cart.
"Ah, marvelous," he said. I watched as he released Philip from his gate and secured his reins. Frederick turned towards me and leaned down to place a kiss on the top of my head. I smiled up at him but my eyes must've shown otherwise. "Don't fret, my Queen," he said as he brushed a thumb against my cheek, "I will return with good tidings."
"Yes, I'm sure," I said to lighten the weight of my worry. He gave me one last smile before the old man got onto the wagon and seated himself at the front. "Take care of Lady Ruth while I'm away, little one," he said to me and I nodded my promise. I stood and watched as he whipped the reins to start Philip on his way. The wagon started moving and leaving the cottage behind. Soon, I couldn't see the vehicle anymore as it disappeared in the trees. Even when it was long gone, I stayed in my spot. I signed and clutched my dress. "Please be safe," I mumbled, as the wind blew a gentle breeze over my body and through the summer leaves of the trees surrounding me.
Let's go inside, Emily. Ruth may be starting her day.
I hurried back inside the cottage, just as Sam told me to do. When I entered, the cottage was quiet, which meant that Ruth hasn't fully awoken yet. I removed my shoes by the front door and walked down the hallway, my feet gently slapping against the wooden floors. I found the other room where Frederick goes to relax and make masks and I picked up the mask I was working on from the place Ruth put it last night. I also grabbed the carving blade, then took my seat on a chair. My hands went to work as they shaped the wood and I blew off any stray wood shavings. Everything was quiet and solemn and I began to realize why Frederick loves to do this so much. My focus relaxed me, even when I wielded a blade that I could injure myself with. The rest of the morning was spent sitting on the chair, carving into the wood to create a beautiful mask that can and will make Frederick proud.
...
A yelp escaped my mouth as I reeled my hands away from the wooden mask. I stared down at my index finger to see a splinter stuck into my skin. "I thought I smoothed it out," I grumbled. Ruth came into the room to see my reason for yelling. I showed her the splinter and she sighed with a soft smile. "You must be careful, Emily," she said to me as she plucked the splinter out of my finger with a tool. A small dot of blood accumulated from the tiny wound and Ruth dabbed at it with a small cloth. I thanked her for her service and I continued my task of carving the mask. "Emily, you're still going to carve," Ruth questioned as she placed her hands at her hips. I nodded without looking up at her. "I finally have the perfect design and I want to accomplish it now before I lose my spark," I told her as I carved lines around the forehead of the mask. I could see her smile out of the corner of my eye. "I'll allow it this time," she said, "but know that I warned you."
"Of course, my Lady," I chimed and gave her a glance. Ruth left the room to do her own task of sewing clothing. It's been one week since Frederick left for business in the towns far from our cottage. His trips may last two to three weeks and so I hope he comes home earlier this time around.
"How does it look, Sam?" I asked as I held up the mask. The eye-holes were already cut out and shaped into cat-like, winged eyes. There are markings that reach to the cheeks on each side as well. I'm working at the forehead now which will have the same markings though they will reach down towards the eyes. I'll paint it later and I hope to avoid a mistake when doing so.
It looks fantastic already. It's very unique, too.
"Thank you," I said with a blush at my cheeks and I continued making the markings on the forehead. I'm eager to finish this project and present it to Ruth and Frederick and maybe even hang it up on the wall along with Frederick's other wonderful pieces. "He'll be so happy," I said and dug my blade into the wood.
How do you think Frederick is fairing?
"He'll sell," I said, "I know he will. He always does. He also has a charm that's inevitable to avoid. And, the crops were healthy and ripe as well, which people love."
I wish we could travel with him, as well, but...
I sighed. "I wish the same," I mumbled. I cannot leave the forest. I am wanted in many colonies. I'd be risking my life if I ever traveled with Frederick. Frederick and Ruth know this. Over the course of the nine months that I've lived with them, I began to reveal myself to them. They know that people label me as a witch and that people have attempted to eradicate me from this Earth for my "sins". The only fact that they do not know is Sam's existence. I can never bring myself to confess his presence. I'm always wary of the old couple whenever Sam uses his abilities. Ever since we've made a home with Ruth and Frederick, Sam has had to use his abilities less and less. There have been no signs of danger so far and no one has given Frederick a rough experience whenever he reaches the towns. No one knows that I live with them. As far as I can tell, I'm dead for all that society cares. I died out there in those woods, either from starvation or being mauled by a predator, along with my blasphemous Father. I do not know if people have forgotten me or they just cannot find me, but I do know I'm safe here with Ruth and Frederick. They care for me like parents and they bring happiness to me. Because of this, Sam is happy as well. This is something we have never known before and now that we have a taste of it, we want to keep it lingering. I work hard to keep from scaring the old couple and so does Sam. By now, they could never hate me, but I can affect things in ways I never intend. That's all I've done ever since I was born. I want to change that. We want to change that.
After an hour of working on the mask, I decided to stop. I've gotten what I wanted done. I still need a few touch-ups until I can paint it. I also need to make paint. I'll have Ruth help me with that later.
I left the room to find Ruth and she sat in the main room, working on the hem of a newly made dress. I sat with her and she gave me a smile. "Have your hands grown tired," she asked me and I nodded. I looked down at them and at all the scratches I've gained over the week as I worked on the mask everyday. I clutched them together tightly and raised my gaze to Ruth again. "The dress looks wonderful," I complimented her. Her plump cheekbones showed themselves as she chuckled and said, "Thank you, Emily." I watched her work for a while and gazed with amazement over how swift her hands were with the cloth and needle and thread. Suddenly, the old woman asked me, "Would you like me to teach you about sewing again?"
I shook my head a little too frantically and stammered, "N-No. You're busy and I wouldn't want to distract you."
"Non-sense," she laughed and set the dress aside. She brought out pieces of white cloth from a basket at her feet and laid them all out for me. From their shapes, I deduced them to make up a fine blouse. "You can work on this one," she said as she handed me the needles and threads. I stared at the small things with nervousness. "I know you can do it, Emily," Ruth assured me and gave me a warm-hearted look. I nodded and grabbed the cloths to begin sewing them together. Ruth would guide me and tell me what stitchings to make and into specific areas. We went over everything she has taught me so far and I was starting to grow acquainted with sewing a bit more. As I was tying a knot to hold the stitchings in place, Ruth leaned forward and planted a kiss on my forehead. I stopped and looked at her. She had this strange look in her eyes, almost as if she was sad yet her smile said she was happy. "I'm glad to have you in my life, Emily," she told me and my face flushed. She brushed my hair away from my face and said, "You're the sweetest child I have ever had the liberty of knowing. I cannot see why so many people would dare to hurt you. I love you like a daughter." I smiled and held her slender hand. "I love you like a mother," I said and I could sense her happiness grow. I continued and said, "I'm glad to know that not everyone in this world will attempt to hurt me. I feel happy a-and safe with you and Frederick. I actually have a home now. I've never had that. So, I thank you for everything you do for me."
"You're family now," she said, "I will always do my best for you, no matter what trials I have to face. I have something more to live for and so does Frederick. I have someone to pass my teachings to and that's such an honor. There was no one for Frederick and I to teach and care for as parents. Well, there was once someone, but..." Her tone grew grim and she cast her dark eyes down. I grew worried but I waited patiently for her words. "I never told you this, Emily, only because I didn't want to sadden you. Frederick and I used to be parents at a time long ago. Our child was a son. His name was William. He was the most beautiful baby I ever laid eyes on. I had plans for him, so that he may live a bright future. He would grow to be a good man. Unfortunately, those plans were demolished..." Her eyes glistened with threatening tears and I held back the urge to tear up as well. Ruth bit her lip and took in a deep breath. "At the age of seven, he was taken from us by white men. We fought for him and we earned our scars. In the end, our efforts were for not. They took him away and I watched him cry and cry, begging to stay with us. Frederick and I never saw him again and I have no idea whether he is dead or alive. We wanted him back and we wanted to bring justice onto the men who took him away but no one would ever help a couple of blacks. They'd let us wallow in our grief and we did. There was nothing we could do... We never tried to have another child because we would only put them through turmoil and we could never bear to have another love taken away from us again. We couldn't allow a being to be hated and cast away just for being alive, for being like us.."
My chest tightened as Ruth's melancholy was fully eminent and I was scared for she has never been this sad. To think that she used to have a child was shocking and to know of what happened is all the more worse. I thought about their son and how he used to run and play and be free. Ruth must've sat with him until he slept, like she does with me. Frederick must've also taught him how to farm, like he has done with me. I felt guilty for taking his parents away. I am not their kin, though they treat me like so. It feels unfair of me to receive the love that should've gone to him. Ruth picked my head up and asked, "What's wrong, little one? Why are you pouting that way?"
My lip quivered as I tried to look away from her and tried desperately to hold my tears. I was unsuccessful. "You shouldn't have to love me," I murmured past my slowly falling tears, "William should be sitting here, not me. I'm just a criminal youth who only taints what was once pure."
Ruth gave me a hard look and said strongly, "That is not you, Emily. That is what everyone labels you. I'm happy to have you right here and right now. Yes, I miss my son but I cannot dwell on the subject for it'll only be a rain cloud on my soul. You are here with me and I cannot neglect you for what is lost to me. I will love you and see to it that you grow up to be a fine woman. I will protect you with all of my being, even if it were to cost me my life. I love you, my dear Emily, and nothing will ever change that." She embraced me against her body and I held my face into her dress, letting the fabric catch my tears. I clutched at her dress and trembled and formed into a ball. Ruth pulled me closer and nearly cradled me like a baby. She has lost things like I have lost things. Knowing that something so tragic has happened to her has worried me. A reality dawned on me and it was the reality that the most terrible of demons can leak into wondrous places. No one will ever be safe, especially me. I'm more worried for Frederick and Ruth, though. They're such nice people but no one can be kind without knowing what pain is too. "Chaos is eternal," I could hear Father's words, echoing from a time long ago. It is. It is also unmerciful.
"I will protect you too," I mumbled against Ruth's dress. She hugged me tighter and leaned her head against mine. "I know you will, my Queen."
...
The familiar neigh of a horse cut through the peaceful summer atmosphere and Ruth and I turned from the garden to see Philip. In tow behind him was Frederick, who bore a wide smile at the sight of us. As soon as he was down from the cart, I ran after him and wrapped my arms around him tightly in a great hug. "I've missed you, my Lord Frederick," I exclaimed. He ruffled my hair and beamed down at me. He suddenly picked me up and spun me around with him, then dropped me onto his chest for me to hold onto him. "My, I have missed you too, my Queen," he bellowed merrily. He looked to Ruth who watched our scene with sweet eyes. Frederick held out one arm and leaned in closer to the old woman. They hugged and shared a brief kiss before sharing sweet declarations of love. "How have both of my ladies been fairing during my departure," he asked us. He set me down on the ground as Ruth explained all that we have done. She even mentioned the time and effort I have put in to create the mask Frederick entrusted to me. "I completed the mask," I added and Frederick looked excited. I ran back into the cottage as Ruth and Frederick talked outside.
"Do you think he will like it," I asked aloud as I held up the mask to the light of the window.
He will love it. You've worked hard during the last two weeks. With all of that effort, how could he not?
"You're right," I said as I smiled down at what was once a plain piece of wood. I raced back outside to Ruth and Frederick whilst holding the mask behind my back. When I saw them again, they both had these looks of concern on their faces and my smile faltered at the sight. I caught a few words: "men", "asking", "a witch", "worried". They turned to me and immediately played smiles again. My eyes shifted between them with uneasiness. Something was wrong. I decided not to confront them about it. Maybe it was nothing.
"Look Frederick," I said as I handed him the mask. He picked it up with careful hands and grinned down at it. "It's even more marvelous than I expected," he praised me and my smile grew wide. "This is a fine piece of work," he said, "this deserves to be put on the wall."
"On the wall," I exclaimed with excitement.
"Of course! What better place is there," he chuckled and handed it back to me. I smiled down at it and my excitement stirred within me. I made Frederick proud! All of those splinters and scrapes were worth this very moment! I did it! I made something beautiful!!!
"Let's go inside," Ruth suggested, "I'll prepare a fantastic meal and we will sit and talk."
"That sounds wonderful, love," Frederick agreed. We all walked back inside the cottage and Ruth went to work on the meal while Frederick bathed from a long time of work and travel. I placed the mask on the wall from an unoccupied nail. I set it in place so it wouldn't look crooked or near falling. As I stepped back to take in the picture of the entire wall, my mind wandered to the image of Ruth and Frederick, talking to each other with faces of worry. What exactly were they discussing while I was grabbing the mask? Why did they have to change their mood as soon as I met with them again? Did something happen on Frederick's trip? Did he lose a basket or miss a sale? The cart was empty, though, and he always sells his harvest. It's what the people look for in crops. He's a good farmer so there's no possibility of a sale going wrong. Did something happen to Ruth when I wasn't looking? She would've told me if something happened. This is frustrating me..!
Calm down. We can discuss this with them later. You should relax with them and have them settle down. You should celebrate Frederick's safe return, Emily.
"You're right," I sighed and picked up my smile again. I left the room to help Ruth in the kitchen with the meal she was preparing. Soon Frederick was finished with his bath and he met with us in the kitchen as well. We were having a good time together as we laughed and enjoyed each other's company. I missed these times. Two weeks can feel like forever. I'm happy to have everyone together again. I feel better now.
...
I was awoken to the sound of Philip neighing and making a ruckus outside of the cottage. My eyes were tight with sleep and I rubbed at them to fully wake up. The bedroom was dark and barely any light seeped through my window. Philip continued to whine and I was growing bothered with it. I slipped out of bed to visit Ruth and Frederick's bedroom to let them know that Philip was going a bit ballistic in his stall. I made my way through the dark of the cottage and I was near to knocking on the other bedroom door when I heard a voice outside. My body froze and my heart began to beat in my ears from the eerie silence.
Someone's here. Get Frederick and Ruth and hide!
Flashbacks started to rush through my mind and I begged to have them stop. Not at a time like this! "No, not again," I whispered ever so quietly. Memories of people raiding the yard of my cabin with torches and weapons played out. Men of all ages aimed muskets at me and bellowed the word of God to me, like their beliefs would cleanse my soul. Now what? Who is outside and why? I can't have another home destroyed, I can't lose anybody else, not when I'm finally happy!!!
I quietly sneaked into Ruth and Frederick's room and woke up the old man. He stirred but I shushed him rather harshly. "Someone is outside," I said, and with those three words Frederick bore the demeanor of a centurion. He was quick to find his musket in the dark of the bedroom and he had me wake up Ruth. I did as he said and woke the poor woman up from a peaceful sleep. She got up and held me close as she led me away into the private room where Frederick's masks are. Soon we were huddled into a corner, staring wide at our surroundings for any one who might come out at us. In our very close proximity, Ruth whispered, "Stay inside the cottage, no matter what, and if you must escape without us then do so. I need you to stay safe." I nodded and gulped down a lump of anxiety. I remember the old couple talking about this safety plan with me a few months ago. There is a hidden escape hatch in here that leads down into a tunnel that Frederick worked on himself. It should lead a good twenty yards away from the cottage, which is enough of a head start from danger to get somewhere safe. I hope we won't have to use the tunnel to escape an eminent threat. Ruth holds me still as she awaits for the moment when he must use the escape route. I keep hoping to myself that there is no threat at all, that it might be some stray traveler who lost his way and needs our help because we're the only people for miles. Ruth and Frederick have told stories about people like that and how they have helped them find their way again. Please let this be another of those times..!
The cottage was completely silent and the ringing in my ears was beginning to drive me mad. This is all too familiar to old times, when I would hide in a cold, dark corner and await Father's orders to come out again. If there was no danger then he would have me come out and we would go on with the day or night. If there was a threat then he would run after me, grab me and carry me far away from where we once lived. I don't want to leave this place. I want to stay with Ruth and Frederick and be happy. My heart is beating wildly within my chest and I feared it was enough to alert my presence. When I began to tremble from anxiety, Ruth pulled me within her embrace tightly. Her warmth and presence relaxed me and I tried to manage my breathing again. I'll be fine. I've been fine for nine months. I'll be-.
There was a loud sound of musket fire and I jumped in my spot. My body continued to tremble violently once more and I whimpered under my breath. The door to the cottage opened and closed shut and a man's voice threw out a hissed curse. I recognized it as Frederick's and I hoped he wasn't hurt. I heard him move things across the floor to block the door and I wanted to run out and help him but Ruth's tight grip made sure that I stayed put. I wanted to sob and scream as loud as I could but that would only cause more trouble. Soon more voices stirred outside and I realized that there was more people. There's a group! I knew it! They've come after me again! No, why can't they leave me be?!
One man shouted orders while the others followed. Lights flickered across the window and I recognized them to be the glow of torches and lanterns. My panic grew at the thought of one of those torches or lanterns being thrown onto the cottage and setting everything aflame. I thought about that suffocating smoke that enters the lungs and seemingly burns you from the inside out. I've felt it before and it leaves the nastiest taste and presence long before you've escaped the hell. I was terrified of what they would do. What new ideas have they conjured during my absence? I didn't desire to know.
Just as my panic was growing, it spiked to a dangerous level at the sound of the door being rammed. This noise distracted me from the unfortunate happenings of the window in the private room being smashed. Ruth and I screamed as glass shattered and scrambled in a mess across the floor. Quickly, she had me duck behind a piece of furniture and she ran into the middle of the room. I wanted to scream for her not to but she gave me a look that told me to stay quiet. So I huddled behind the furniture and watched as men started coming in through the window. They found Ruth first, which must've been what she planned for and to keep the men from searching the rest of the room she decided to go livid. She lashed out at one of the men who earned a scratch on the face from her nails. To my horror the man struck her across the face and she fell onto the floor in a shaking heap. Instead of cowering though, she glared ferociously at the men and I felt a chill run up my spine at how her sweet, motherly eyes can bore daggers into steel.
"Where is the witch," a man asked her impatiently.
"What witch?" Ruth growled.
The man struck her again.
"I know of no witch," she spat, "I do know that you heathens have come barging into my home with brute force and I do not take kindly to such actions!!"
"Your kind should not have any home to begin with," the man snapped and grabbed her arm to yank the old woman to her feet. The man dragged her out of the room and the rest of the men followed out. I heard heated shouting and I recognized the loudest voice to belong to Frederick. He was enraged that the men were handling Ruth so rashly. I crawled over to the door and watched as the men took the couple outside of the cottage. The entire house was empty now and so I was free to sneak about it. I peeked out of the window at the front of the cottage and watched as the men had Ruth and Frederick on the ground. There were about seven men and one was pacing in front of the black couple with a look of scorn. He asked, "Where is the witch?"
Frederick was first to answer as he said, "I don't know who you're talking about. I haven't heard of any witch in my territory."
"Your territory," the man repeated distastefully, "my, what a comical statement for you to say, considering you and your strumpet are nothing but filthy Negroes."
"My wife is not a strumpet," Frederick snapped and I could see the veins at his temple pop with anger. "You and your men need to leave! If you will not then I'll have no choice but to drive you all out myself!!"
"Is that so? Do you intend to kill us if we do not obey?"
"If I have to then I will," Frederick growled, with a ferocity that seemed so foreign to me.
"Well, my eyes deceive me then, because I'm sure there are seven men here in total and only you and your woman," the man stated knowingly, "And, I'm sure the people wouldn't take your side as you are nothing but filthy creatures. You have no dominion over us. You're worthless and you will die a thief's death at the gallows if you dare to harm any of us."
Frederick could say nothing as the man's words were unfortunately true. Ruth and Frederick may have their land and their marriage but they would never be considered as human. The man's words were infuriating me and I had every urge to storm out there and strike him in the groin. I wanted to do something but what could I do?
Let me handle them..
Sam's words were ominous and a cruel memory came to mind. The last time I allowed Sam to handle any bad men, he killed them brutally and left a complete bloodbath in his wake. It was awful and it only stirred trouble for me and Father. From then on, I promised to myself that I wouldn't let him create another massacre again. I can't allow him to handle the situation, not when Frederick and Ruth can witness it. "No," I whispered."
But, Emily-!
"You will not," I hissed quietly.
Emily, you're making a mistake-.
"And I will go through with it," I growled and watched the scene outside unfold. I only felt horror as I watched one man strike Frederick across the face as he shouted the same question: "Where is the witch?!"
"He doesn't know," Ruth screamed while tears filled her eyes. I couldn't bear to see her cry.
Emily, please.
"I said no," I snapped and clutched at the window sill as I watched the man hurt Frederick while the others took amusement out of it. I desired to see their laughing, smiling face contorted into expressions of horror and pain. I gasped and shook my head. "Sam, no," I whimpered and clutched at my head, "stop it!"
"For the last time, where is the witch?!" The man snapped again as he struck Frederick with another forceful blow.
"Don't touch him, you filthy mongrel," Ruth screamed, enough to damage the vocal cords.
"Quiet, harlot," another man shouted and hit her as well. My hands clenched into fists and tears of frustration welled in my eyes. I can't let this go on any longer. Frederick is already bleeding and Ruth is in shambles. The bad men are enjoying themselves too much and they don't deserve to take entertainment in Ruth and Frederick's pain. I began to will the courage to end everything and turn myself in. I have gone on long enough. No more running. I cause havoc wherever I take shelter and I cannot afford to ruin anymore lives. I'm nothing but a plague and I need to be eradicated. Surely my punishment has worsened overtime as I have avoided it and caused more crime but it will be better than to see the ones I love become broken until they shatter. Ruth and Frederick shouldn't have to sacrifice themselves for the likes of me.
Just as I was finally developing the courage to reveal myself and take punishment, there was suddenly a loud ruckus and I put my attention back at the situation outside. Ruth was screaming and trying to hit whoever she could as one of the men began beating Frederick with the butt of his musket. I gaped at the horrible sight and was further horrified to see a bleeding gash on the side of the old man's face. "I'm beginning to think that your kind likes this pain," the man laughed, "nothing but filthy, worthless Negroes you are. Tell me where the witch is, we know you have information!"
"I know nothing," Frederick shouted and spat at the man's shoes, letting a mixture of blood and saliva coat the brown leather. The man stopped beating Frederick to stare at the disgusting sight. He frowned slightly and a strange look reflected in his eyes. He was strangely calm despite Frederick's act of disrespect. The man glowered down at the old man and said, "This has gone on long enough. If you know nothing, then I suppose you're right," the man said. Frederick and the man stared at each other for the longest time with intense and cold eyes. "I hope your search is aimless," Frederick growled and coughed a violent storm. The man's mouth twitched at the corners and he responded, "Is this aimless?"
Before I could run out there, before I could suck in a deep breath, before I could even blink, the man aimed his musket at Frederick's chest and fired. Ruth's shrilled cries of fear and anguish filled the air and the wind carried it through the trees. The old man lay in a heap on the ground and blood began to pool out from under his body. I stared at the body of what was once a hearty, strong and living man. My chest tightened as every breath was taken from me, just as Frederick was. I wanted to scream and I wanted to cry. I wanted to curse the world with nothing but disease and death and sin, but I'm not so powerful. As of now, I'm powerless. My voice refused to leave my mouth and I couldn't form tears from the utter shock of the moment. With this, I watched in silence as Ruth cried and screamed and cursed at the ground. I watched and did nothing for I could not do anything because I am terribly incompetent. I can hear myself within my head, telling Ruth 'I will protect you too'. What am I doing here? Why am I still sitting here when I should be keeping my word?!
The man who shot poor Frederick turned to Ruth and I shook my head, mentally pleading for him to leave her be. Even my voice sounded feeble within my mind: Please don't hurt her. Please. Please!! I trembled as I stared at Ruth, as she helplessly stared up at the man with wide, saddened eyes. Another man walked up beside him and raised his own musket. Ruth shook her head and so did I. I can't let her die! I have to let Sam help! No, I can't! No, no, what do I do?! I can't think! No!
Silent tears fell from my eyes and streaked my cheeks. Please don't. Don't leave me alone. Don't take anything anymore!
"SAM, SAVE HER," I finally screamed as everything became too much. Unfortunately, my cries were too late and unheard of as the musket fire covered it up. Ruth jerked slightly from the impact of the bullet to her heart and she fell to the ground. I covered my mouth and screamed into it, sobbing uncontrollably, wishing for this to be nothing but a dream. It must be a dream. I must still be sleeping and this is all a terrible dream! But, as I looked back at the two bodies of two great people, and as I felt my heart pang with agony and distress, I knew that this was all too real. I should've revealed myself sooner. I should've let Sam take over the situation. I should've let him tear their heads off and leave Ruth, Frederick and I in peace. I could've saved them. But I didn't. Because I'm a stupid, incompetent, little girl. Now I've lost everything all over again.
"What should we do with them," a man asked as he stared at the dead couple. The leader of the gang of men spat on their corpses and I felt my blood boil. "Leave them here to rot," he said."
"And the cottage?"
The man turned to the cottage and he stared at it with disgust. He thought for a moment until he said, "Burn it." I gasped and quickly raced down the hall and down to the private room where Frederick made his masks. I shut the door behind me but instead of searching for the escape hatch, I slid down and sat against the door. Suddenly I began to sob and I didn't want to. I needed to move and escape! But what would be the use in that? I have nothing again. The last hope of a better life was taken from me and I did nothing to stop it. Why should I escape with all that I've brought onto people? I'll just bring more misfortune unto others. I'm tired of running away from death and I'm tired of making so much effort to survive. There is no good future for me like I'd always dreamed of. Those are all wishes that cannot be fulfilled. No more running. I'm too tired to run..
Emily what are you doing? Run!
"No more," I sobbed and held myself, "no more.."
Emily, please run!
"I'm tired of running!" I screamed, "I tired of having people die just because I exist! I'm tired of being incompetent! I'm tired of existing!!!" I curled up into a ball and rested my head on my knees. "Why must I have been born," I murmured depressingly. The smell of smoke began to fill my nose and I began to cough. The crackling of fire was all that I could hear and soon the fire was attacking the door on which I sat against. It clawed at me from under the crack of the door and I braced myself for unbearable pain. After many moments, when I should've been burning, I was left untouched. The fire was roaring all around me but I was not burning. Confusion filled me and I gaped at the sight of a circle around me, leaving me and some parts of the floor untouched by the deadly flames. Why is this happening?
If you were not born then I wouldn't exist...
I froze and stared forward into the bright, thrashing flames, listening to Sam's voice.
I wouldn't experience the world if it was not for you... Without you, I would be nothing. Emily, I...I want to exist!
Sam's voice wavered and my heart ached. He sounds like he's about to cry.
I want to exist, Emily. Please let me! Please don't die! I want to exist with you and love you! I love you Emily! Please let me exist! Let me live! Live!!
Tears welled in my eyes at Sam's emotional words. I can't break his heart like this. I can't take something so precious away from him. Not after everything we've been through.
You still have a chance...
My hands clenched into fists and I tightened my jaw. I shouldn't give up on Sam. I have to keep living for his sake. There's no one left but him and I must fight for whatever the world hasn't taken from me yet.
With some courage, I lifted myself up to my feet and walked towards the escape hatch that lay in a corner of the room. Sam kept the fire from my body as I moved and I was about to open the hatch when I stopped. I stood for a moment before turning around to look at the wall of masks. Memories of Ruth and Frederick flitted through my mind and I begged for them to stop. I wish I could bring everything with me but I am not capable. I walked up to the wall of masks and looked at all of them. Most of them are already being eaten away by the fire which saddened me greatly. I reached up and grabbed one that was not yet damaged and ran for the hatch again. I lifted it up and jumped down, earning myself a striking pain around my ankles. Once the pain subsided, I began making my way down the long tunnel. Dirt and grime covered my skin and dress but I ignored it. It's nothing after what I've endured.
After a long trek through the tunnel, I made it to the end which was covered by bushes and grass. I crawled out of the opening and took in my surroundings, making sure to be wary of those men or any predacious animals. I sat down by a tree and stared at the mask I grabbed, feeling utterly empty and exhausted. In the distance, the fire from the burning cottage bore bright against the night sky. So many memories were made there yet everything is now lost by hungry flames, terrible men and my failure to act. I grit my teeth and looked away from the light. Despite the darkness that surrounded me, I could still see the designs and color of the mask that lay in my hands. It was the one I created, the one that made Ruth and Frederick so proud. As I stared into its empty eyes, tears began to fall on its wooden surface and I held it to my face as I sobbed. So much love and care was put into this object and now I'm cursing it with sadness and anger. Without realizing it, I cried myself to sleep against the tree, and the smell of smoke traveled through the air, carrying with it the happiness that Sam and I will never gain back.
...
My hand trailed over the fine hair on the bronze horse in front of me. Philip neighed and I placed some attention to his neck. "I'm glad they didn't take you," I murmured tiredly and stared sadly into the muscular animal's black eyes. I sniffled some and fed Philip a bag of oats, the last one he'll ever have here. "Enjoy it while it lasts," I said and walked away from the busy creature. I walked out onto the yard and stared at the green grass and then at the two dead bodies that contrasted differently. Ruth and Frederick lay dead, with blood spattered over their clothes. Their eyes were closed and their hands lay across their chests. I had to endure the trouble of looking into their dead sweet eyes in order to close them and I could hardly bear touching them without thinking about the hugs they've given me. I missed their sweet embrace. Now they can only embrace death while I am left with no one to hug. Sam has no body and I'm afraid Philip might grow upset. My arms feel so numb without the warmth of another.
I released a sigh and traced my gaze over to the twin holes in the ground, which Sam and I worked so hard to create. I looked down at my hands to see all of the scrapes and dirt under my nails that signified my hard-work.
Are you ready to bury them, Emily?
I bit my lip and nodded hesitantly. It has to be done. I cannot leave them to rot outside. That would be a disgrace to all that they are and to what they have sacrificed for me. I started with Frederick first and dragged him carefully to his grave. I huffed and heaved as I put my strength into carrying the heavy man. I wish I was as strong as him, then maybe I would feel better as I struggle to drag his body and maybe this would be done sooner. Sam assisted me along the way and I was grateful for his cooperation. I jumped into the grave to carry Frederick's body in and I placed him respectively. I crawled out of the grave and went on to Ruth. I carried her just as I did Frederick and it was a tad bit easier as she was ultimately lighter. I tried to avoid looking at her face but I couldn't help it and I found myself gazing at her beautiful dark face. I longed for her to smile again but those chances were beyond my reach. Only in memories, can I preserve her radiant, motherly aura. Sam helped me to carry Ruth as well and soon she was in her own grave too. I stood in front of both graves and took in the sight of the lovely, deceased couple before me. Warm tears fell from my eyes but I uttered no cries. I am too broken to release anymore sobs. That seems to be all that I have done during my life.
"I'm sorry we couldn't save you," I whispered to them when in reality I must've been speaking to the air, which still reeked with smoke from the burned cottage, which was now a blackened, charred wreckage of wood and destroyed happiness. I extended my work as I pushed in the dirt that I dug out, letting the soil cover Ruth and Frederick until I couldn't see them anymore. Once I was finished and the twin holes were now twin mounds, I sat in front of them in silence. Despite that it was useless, I held my hands together and prayed one last time for the Lord to guide Ruth and Frederick to an afterlife that could liberate their souls. I felt the need to pray for my safety and liberation as well, but I'm sure the Lord would never grant me such luxury, especially for what I will do soon.
Emily, we should leave soon. We have a busy week ahead of us.
"Yes," I said and stood up to my feet. I looked for the mask I saved from the fire, which I left on a nice patch of grass, and I placed it onto my face. I tied the string around my head and made sure it was nice and tight so the mask wouldn't slip off. My vision gazed through the eye-holes of the red and white mask and I looked to Philip, who was now finished with his oats. "Come, boy," I said and waited for the great horse to stroll towards me. He stood next to me and shook his head briefly as he huffed. I stroked his mane for a few moments until I gathered my strength and climbed on top of him. My arms wrapped around Philip's large neck and I held my legs firmly to his sides.
Are you sure you want to go through with this?
"Yes," I said sharply, with a ferocious certainty. "I'll be damned if I let those men go on after what they have done to us. People like them do not deserve the safety and happiness that we struggle to attain. No more running, no more hiding and no more pain! It's time that I change things and settle the score."
You desire this, regardless of the consequences?
"Yes," I said.
...Okay. Then let us march forth, my Queen. I will serve thee until death consume my soul.
"So shall I," I said and willed for Philip to move forward into the trees. The bronze horse strolled and left behind the place I called home and the people who I loved so dearly. I will protect you too, I had said and my words were false. I cannot protect and it is clear to me now that I destroy better than I preserve. If so, then I will put this into good use. May Ruth and Frederick and the Lord look away from the Hell I will bestow.
"Sam?" I called.
Yes?
A pause of silence weighed on us, yet the wind blew and Philip clopped his hooves against the ground as he marched on, without notice of this tension. Then, I said...
"Don't dare to hold back," I growled fiercely.
Another pause of silence.
Then Sam laughed with macabre amusement.
Yes, my Queen.
-TBC-