Maya walked into her apartment after her long twenty-four shift to find Maddie hunched over the toilet as she puked up the entire contents of what she had eaten. Things were still pretty tense between the mother & daughter duo, but that didn't stop Maya from running in straight away to take care of her.
"Are you alright? Did you eat something bad or something," Maya asked as she held her daughter's hair back. Maddie tried to shrug her away but Maya continued to be there for her.
"I don't know, I just don't feel good," Maddie said weakly as she hugged the toilet bowl.
Maya couldn't help but cringe, she had never been one to good with sickness, and this was especially the last thing that she wanted after she had just gotten off a long shift, but even though her daughter didn't want anything to do with her right now, she would still be there to take care of her.
Ever since finding out yesterday, Maddie kept herself hidden away in her bedroom to avoid the older women. Maya felt heartbroken by it, but she understood that the girl probably felt confused and needed space.
Today was meant to be her & Carina's day off, so they had both planned it to spend time together and have sex all over the apartment. Obviously, now her plans would need to be changed, it wouldn't be appropriate to have sex everywhere, the last thing she wanted was her daughter to be scarred as well.
"Uh okay, right why don't you go back to bed. I don't think you should probably go to school today Mads," Maya told her, cringing again as Maddie started to throw up again.
Maddie wanted to object, if she went to school then she would be out of the apartment and could continue to avoid Maya, but she felt so weak that she could barely even get up off the floor, there wasn't any energy after she had basically threw up her entire insides.
"Alright." Maddie begrudgingly agreed, she tried to get up off the floor but she could barely even move, her whole body hurt so much.
"Do you need some help?" Maya asked hastily as she placed her hand on her shoulder.
"I got it," Maddie shook her head and shrugged her biological mother's hand off her shoulder. Trying to get up from the floor still, she had no luck and slumped back down.
"Okay look, I know that you can't stand to be in the same room as me now but you're my daughter whether you like it or not and you're sick so just let me help you please," Maya pleaded with her daughter.
"Fine," Maddie said as she exhaled a sigh. Maya leant down to pick her daughter up off the floor and easily carried her back into her bedroom, despite the teenager's protests. "This doesn't mean that I forgive you yet," Maddie mumbled.
"I know that kiddo. I just want to help you, I'm not a monster like you think I am," Maya said as she tucked her daughter into bed. "I'm going to go and call your school to let them know you won't be in, just stay in bed and shout to me if you need anything," Maya said, she went to kiss the top of her head but she didn't think that would be a good idea right now so she just exited the bedroom.
"Ciao," Carina smiled brightly as she walked into her girlfriends' apartment.
"Hey," Maya said with a sigh. Carina frowned when she saw the stressed and worn out expression on Maya's face.
"Bella, what's the matter?" she asked concerned while she walked into the kitchen and placed the groceries she had picked up on the Island.
"I'm just stressed out by everything and to make matters worse, I didn't expect to return from my twenty-four shift to deal with a sick kid," Maya said.
"Oh, Maddie is sick? Poor Bambina," Carina said and just at that moment, she caught sight of Maddie weakly going into the bathroom to puke again. "Why don't you head to bed? I know you're exhausted, you have just finished a twenty-four-hour shift," Carina said.
"I can't, I need to take care of Maddie," Maya shook her head.
"Bella, I'm here as well, I can help you." Carina insisted. "I'm a doctor, I can deal with a little bit of sick. I know you don't deal well with it," she chuckled.
"You don't mind?" Maya asked.
"Of course not. I'm here to help with whatever you need," Carina smirked at her girlfriend. Maya bit her lip and smiled as she nodded.
"Well, I can think of something that you can help me with," Maya said as a smile played on her face.
"Okay, well once I have taken care of the Bambina, then I will come and join you in bed," Carina chuckled and sent her girlfriend a wink. Maya grinned and walked off to her bedroom while Carina made her way over to the bathroom where Maddie was curled up in a ball on the floor. "Oh Bambina," she sighed in sympathy.
"I don't feel well at all," Maddie mumbled from her spot on the bathroom floor. Carina felt the teenagers head and winced at the heat that was radiating from the younger girl.
"You're burning up a lot Bambina," Carina sighed. Maddie whimpered as she felt another rush of nausea build up and she was quick to move to hunch back over the toilet to throw up. "Okay I am going to find a thermometer, just stay here a minute,"
"Not like I can move, I feel so weak," Maddie mumbled.
"Well I'm glad that you still have your sarcasm Maddie," Carina chuckled.
Carina stood up and walked back into the kitchen to rummage through the draws in search of a thermometer and the Tylenol. After she found them both, Carina walked back into the bathroom to check Maddie's temperature.
"God, my stomach hurts so much, I just want it to stop!" Maddie groaned as she continued to curl up in a ball. Carina quickly took the girls temperature.
"I think that you may have the stomach flu. Your temperature is at 100.02 degrees," Carina sighed. "Come on let's get you back to bed, you can take some Tylenol and you will feel better," The older woman said, gently moving to lift her into her arms and carry her back into her bedroom.
"I really hate being sick, it sucks!" Maddie groaned after she swallowed the Tylenol that Carina had given her.
"I don't think anyone likes being sick Bambina, you should just try and sleep it off," Carina said as she tucked her in, she made sure she had enough fluids on her bedside table before she gently pressed a kiss on the top of her head. Walking out of the bedroom, she made her way into Maya's bedroom and settled on the bed next to her, "Okay, Bambina is settled in bed, I think that it may be the stomach flu so hopefully it doesn't last too long, now where was we?" Carina asked seductively.
"Oh, is it just me, or are orgasms better in the daylight?" Maya asked after they had finished having sex. Carina laughed and propped herself up on the pillow with her elbow.
"It isn't just you. I actually did a whole study on female orgasms." Carina said.
"Oh, that's a study I'd like to see," Maya said as they both chuckle. Carina started to play with the blondes' hair.
"How do you feel?" Carina asked.
"Right now? Amazing." Maya said with a chuckle. "Well minus the fact that Maddie's absolutely despises me and she has got the stomach flu so stands a chance we could get sick as well,"
"I mean about your mama," Carina said. Maya's smile faltered.
"I haven't talked to her since the spaghetti dinner," Maya admitted.
"Don't you think you should try?" Carina suggested.
"Why?" Maya continued to question and Carina chuckled.
"Because she's your mom, and she's hurting, and..." Carina said.
"Yeah, that's not my problem. Maddie wouldn't have found out yet if it wasn't for her," Maya was quick to object and moved to sit up in bed. "Besides, if she wants to ruin her life and live in a motel forever because of some raised voices, that's her choice," Maya said as she grabbed some pants to put on. Carina moved to sit up as well behind her.
"I get it, that this is hard for you, Maya, but don't you think maybe there is some truth in what your mom says..." Carina said.
"Stop." Maya snapped at her girlfriend which took Carina by surprise. "Please" she added before she got off her bed, "I am going to check on Maddie and see if her fevers broke yet."
Maya walked across the hall from her bedroom and opened the door slightly to peer into Maddie's bedroom to find her passed out on her bed. Maya stepped further into the bedroom and felt the younger girls head to see that it was still radiating heat.
"Carina?" Maddie mumbled, she was always a light sleeper so she woke up from the touch.
"No kiddo, it's me, I just wanted to check up on you. Go back to sleep," Maya said. Maddie felt too exhausted to do anything other than sleep, she nodded weakly and closed her eyes again.
Maya got up from the bed and stood up to make her way out of the bedroom, she lingered in the doorway as she watched her daughter sleep, she knew this was hard for her to understand so she had to give her time and space.
"Has Maddie's fever broken yet?" Carina asked appearing out of the bedroom.
"Not yet, the heat is still radiating off her forehead. I'm starting to get a little concerned," Maya said.
"Well we just have to keep a close eye on it," Carina said as they moved into the kitchen. Maya walked over to the pantry to grab vegetables out. "Maya, we need to talk about your dad though," She said, knowing the subject was tense at the moment.
"No, we don't," Maya stated firmly, continuing to angrily chop the veg. "I mean we can talk, anything other than the topic of my family," She added. Carina frowned at her girlfriend.
Maddie woke up to the sound of raised voices of the two women in the kitchen. Sighing, she didn't understand what they were talking about. Maddie heard the sound of an object being thrown down and flinched as she remembered the memories of the previous years where she lived with the people that she thought were her parents.
"How dare you disobey me!" Lane shouted in the face of the ten-year-old as he slammed his fist down on the table. The three of them were sat around the table as they ate dinner, Maddie wasn't wanting to eat her dinner however and Lane let his temper get the better of him. "You will sit here and eat your dinner, you will not leave the table until you have eaten!"
"Lane, stop, you're scaring her!" Katherine tried to shelter the ten-year-old who was shaking from fear from the older man.
"Stay out of this, Katherine, the child needs to learn to do as she is told!" Lane shouted in a rage. "Eat, now!" he continued to shout in the child's face.
Maddie had always known that the man who she thought of as her father had a nasty temper, he had broken her arm before and she had a scar from a shard of glass that he threw at her in one of his rages.
"Okay, I'm not interested in talking," Maddie heard Maya raise her voice and she flinched. Maddie moved to get out of bed, she thought about walking into the kitchen but she knew that wouldn't help so she hid around the corner.
"I'm just trying to help," Carina insisted as she sat on a stool.
"He never hit me," Maya said as she began to get even more pissed.
"That's not the only way you abuse somebody, Maya. My dad has never hit me, either. He has never hit my brother, but that doesn't mean that we were not abused. Psychological abuse, v-verbal abuse... they... they are real." Carina continued as she was beginning to get frustrated. Maddie winced at the raised voices, peering around the corner to watch them both.
"I don't want to fight with you," Maya said after she breathes deeply.
"I don't want to fight, either." Carina sighed.
"Then I think you should go," Maya said, a smile on her face to try to keep her calm.
"What?" Carina asked as she chuckled. "This is not how you handle a fight. M-M-M... Maya," Carina stuttered and swallowed the lump that formed in her throat, "I... I'm here for you. I'm not leaving." Carina said as she shook her head. Maya continued to stare at her girlfriend. Maddie wasn't sure what the hell was happening right now.
"Okay, okay. I'm... I'm... I'm gonna... I need... I need to run. So I'm gonna... I'm gonna go on a run." Maya said, walking away from her girlfriend to put her sneakers on and exit the apartment, she hadn't even noticed Maddie stood in the hallway as she was so angry.
Maddie walked into the kitchen to find Carina still sat on the stool.
"I thought you were asleep Bambina," Carina sighed.
"It's a bit difficult when you two are arguing. What happened?" Maddie asked.
"Maya's still in denial about your Grandfather," Carina sighed. Maddie chewed her lip anxiously.
Maya was in the Gym at the station as she worked out with a skipping rope. After her run, she just kind of ended up at the station. There was so much going around her head right now and she didn't know what else to do other than work out as her go-to strategy.
"Hey. Uh. What are you... What are you doing here?" Andy asked as she stood in the door frame of the Gym. Maya briefly looked at her best friend before continuing to jump rope.
"I went for a run, and my body just came here, so I figured I'd work out. Maddie knows the truth as well and she hates me," Maya said. "You?" she asked.
"Oh, well good luck with that... Are there any old files here, like Captain's logs?" Andy asked. Maya stopped jumping rope and moved to sit down on the bench.
"I think so. Why?" Maya asked.
"Where? I... I-I just need to figure something out." Andy stuttered across her words.
"Figure what out?" Maya asked, lifting the weights.
"Just who my dad was," Andy said. Maya continued to look confused.
"What do you mean who your dad was? He was our hero. He literally sacrificed his life to save ours." Maya continued to lift weights as Andy stepped in closer to show her an old photo, "What am I looking at?"
"My mother looks miserable. I've always had this idea that my parents had this epic, amazing love story, that they were soulmates, meant to be, but what if they weren't? What if they were just two messed-up people who rushed into a family, and then one of them died?" Andy said anxiously.
"Andy, do you think maybe it's possible that you're projecting your anxiety about your own marriage onto your parents?" Maya asked.
"Why can't I just say something without someone writing it off as j-just... Can I... Can I just talk?" Andy asked annoyed.
"Okay, okay. What are you talking about?" Maya said as she put the weights down.
"I've been going through my dad's things, and I... I don't know... I feel like... like maybe I didn't even know who my dad was, like... Like, what do I actually know about Pruitt Herrera? He was... He was overbearing. He was controlling. He was..." Andy said as Maya cut her off.
"If he was controlling, it was only because he loved you." Maya insisted.
"Controlling because he loved you." Andy said hesitant, "That sounds like a... like a Lifetime movie about a person who needs to escape." Andy said.
"Andy, you know who your dad was. We all do." Maya continued to insist.
"Do we? Or do we just know the version of him that... that he wanted us to see?"
"No. No! You do not get to turn your dad into a bad guy. You won the lottery of dads, and now, just because he died, you are gonna tear down his memory 'cause it's easier than coping with the loss of him? No, I am not gonna stand by and watch you do that, not to my Captain." Maya said as she continued to try and keep her temper in check.
"Not to your Captain?" Andy frowned, "Maya, he was my dad." she said as her facial expression changed.
"Yeah, and you should count yourself lucky!" Maya said as Andy shook her head and stormed out of the gym.
"Do you think she will be back soon?" Maddie wondered, glancing up at the woman from where she lay on the couch with her head on Carina's lap as they had the TV on as background noise.
"I don't know Bambina, hopefully soon, how are you feeling?" Carina asked.
"Do you mean about being ill, or everything else?" Maddie asked with a sigh.
"I mean everything Maddie, you have been so upset Bambina, you have shut Maya out, you shut me out, you have shut everyone out. You need to know that what she did, she did for the right reasons, all she wants to do is protect you," Carina tried to justify her girlfriend's actions, despite the fact they argued not too long ago.
"Protect me from who? I wasn't protected while I lived with Lane, the man who was supposed to be my father," Maddie mumbled. Carina frowned.
"What do you mean Bambina?" Carina asked.
"Hey. What are you still doing here?" Jack asked as he passed Maya's office where she was busy sorting out files on the bookshelf to try and get her mind off other things.
"Just catching up on some work, I'm trying to avoid going home since both my girlfriend and daughter are upset with me right now," Maya moved to walk over to her desk.
"Oh wow, really?" Jack said surprised.
"Yep, Maddie is pretty angry for me not telling her. I screwed up Jack," Maya said flicking through the paperwork, "What are you doing here?" Maya asked.
"I don't know if you heard, but, uh, Warren and Avery were held up on the PRT." Jack told her and Maya looked concerned, " Yeah, Avery got shot." Jack said.
"Is he okay?" Maya asked.
"Yeah. Yeah, everyone's just a bit shaken up." Jack told her using brief hand gestures.
"Thank you for notifying me," Maya said as she sorted out the paperwork. Jack hesitated before speaking again.
"Have you talked to Andy? I'm worried about her." Jack said worriedly. Maya turned around to grab some more materials.
"What a surprise. The men in Andy's life are worried about her. She is fine, Jack. She's grieving her father. Let her do that, however, she needs to." Maya said.
"She married our Battalion Chief after a few weeks of dating, and you don't think that's a little bit concerning?" Jack said as he closed the office door.
"I think that Andy is a grown woman who can make her own decisions. She has made that very clear, Lieutenant." Maya looked up from the paperwork to look at Jack.
"We are Andy's closest friends, Maya, you and me." Jack insisted as he sighed and rested his hands down on the chair in front of him.
"And as her friends, we should give her some space. Not everyone needs therapy, Jack." Maya told him.
"Wow. Yeah, I told you that in confidence, as my Captain, and you're just gonna throw it back in my face? " Jack was taken back by that comment. Maya felt bad instantly.
"Sorry. That wasn't about you. Carina keeps trying to get me to admit to something that isn't true, and I'm sick of it. You know, my father..." Maya said with a smile and Jack cut her off.
"Is a real prick," Jack interjected.
"Hey, you don't know what you're talking about. You don't know me." Maya told him taken back by his comment and shook her head in disagreement.
"No, you know I do," Jack said waving his finger about and pointing at her, "And you hate it because anyone who knows the real Maya is a threat," Jack said.
"Get out," Maya said.
"Right? 'Cause here comes the Maya freeze-out." Jack said as Maya moved to open the door, "No, does Carina know it's coming yet, or are you gonna blindside her like you did me? " Jack asked.
"Get the hell out of my office," Maya said as she opened the office door.
"Way to prove my point. You're broken, Maya." Jack confirmed.
"Oh! The foster boy without a daddy is calling me broken?" Maya said as she raised her voice.
"Yeah, well, I'd rather have no daddy than have yours," Jack argued.
"Don't you dare talk about my father like that," Maya slammed the door shut as she yelled in his face.
"Or what?" Jack argued back against his captain.
"Or I will bury you!" Maya threatened as she pushed him back.
"Yeah, threats of violence. That checks out." Jack said as Maya roughly grabbed the collar of his shirt and they forcefully kissed one another as she ripped his shirt apart, Jack picked her up and they moved back into Maya's bunk as they continued to kiss roughly.
"I remember it all. The abuse I mean" Maddie said, she turned to look up at Carina who frowned. Maddie sat up and continued to explain, "It wasn't so bad when Maya and Mason lived at home, sure there was raised voices but after they left it got worse," Maddie said and Carina smiled softly at the teenager and rubbed her arm in comfort. "Lane had a terrible temper, he broke my arm last year because he was so angry that I lost a soccer game," Maddie admitted.
"What?" Carina asked horrified. "You need to tell Maya about this," Carina was sure that this was something that Maya needed to be made aware of, after all, it was her own daughter who was hurt by her father.
"No, I don't want to tell her. After it happened he apologised profusely but it wasn't long until his temper got the best of him again," Maddie confessed. "The next time he got angry was because I had bad grades, he threw a glass when he found out and a shard of it stuck in my rib cage, I still have the scar from it," Maddie said. Carina's expression faltered and she continued to comfort the teenage girl.
"Bambina, I really think that you need to tell Maya about this," Carina told the teenager. Maddie shook her head furiously.
"So, the whole time that Maya thought she was protecting me, I wasn't safe at all. I don't know how to forgive her Carina, I mean sometimes when she loses her temper, I flinch because she reminds me of him, Lane, and I get scared, I don't know how to trust her after she lied to me," Maddie admitted.
"Maddie, Maya isn't anything like your Dad, you really need to tell her about this, she needs to know!" Carina insisted, "I don't feel comfortable keeping a secret like this from her," she said.
"I thought that is what we do know, you know, keep secrets from one another," Maddie said sarcastically.
"Maddie, this is something completely different, you have to tell her." Carina continued to insist.
"Fine," Maddie sighed in agreement. Carina was right, even if she was upset with her biological mother, she had to tell her.
It was a few hours later, Maddie was fast asleep in bed still trying to feel better by the time Maya came back to the apartment. Maya walked in and was surprised to still see Carina sat in the hallway.
"I thought you left," Maya stated. "Where's Maddie?" she asked.
"Maddie's asleep, I wanted to wait with her until she felt better. I didn't think it was right to leave her while she is so sick. I-I... I almost did, but then I thought you might need to talk." Carina said with a sigh.
"I don't need anything except space," Maya said annoyed.
"Okay. I can see that you're pushing me away, and I want to give you space, but..." Carina started but Maya cut her off.
"So give me space," Maya interjected.
"I-I understand that you're going through a lot, and... and I... I am trying not to be mad at you, but I..." Carina stuttered.
"Well, I just slept with Jack an hour ago, so be mad at that," Maya said out loud before she walked into her bedroom. Neither of them was aware that during that discussion, Maddie had woken up and heard the last of it, she opened her bedroom door find Carina sat there heartbroken.
"I'm going to go," Carina said feeling numb all of a sudden.
"Carina wait," Maddie said. Carina looked at the teenager sadly.
"I-I need to go. Be good Bambina," Carina said as Maddie nodded, she watched as she gathered her things before exiting the apartment upset.
Maya sat on her bed with her knees up to her chest, she felt like she had made the worse mistake in the world, well now two mistakes, she really seemed like she was screwing up a lot lately.
"What the fuck Maya, you slept with Jack!? Why would you do something so stupid!" Maddie stormed into her biological mothers' bedroom which caught her by surprise.
"Not now Maddie," Maya sighed, not in the mood to deal with the teenager.
"No! You can't do that to Carina, you know that she isn't going to forgive you at all! Seriously why would you sleep with Jack of all people?" Maddie asked pissed off, she loved Carina and couldn't believe the stupidity of Maya.
"You don't get it, Maddie. What do you know, you're just a child." Maya groaned in frustration. Maddie scoffed and shook her head.
"Clearly more than you since you made such an idiotic decision!" Maddie shouted at the older blonde, "You're dumb for doing that Maya!" Maddie scowled at her, the young girl felt this was another reason to be upset with her. Maya sighed and knew she was right.
"Despite finding out what I know, I still love you because you're my family, and you're the one that stuck around for me, but right now I'm seriously so mad at you right now, you really fucked up this time!" Maddie said going to walk out of the bedroom and slamming the door behind her.
•
Bank holiday Monday, no here we have another update!
Hope that you all enjoy reading... Let me know your thoughts!