Rowan- The floor is lava!
Ben- *picks up Alex and places him on top of the counter*
Teddy- *kicks Gerard off the couch*
Rowan- *nature documenter voice* As you can see there's two types of friendships
•••
Robin- Can you carry this for me?
Grape- I don't know, I can barely carry the weight of my depression
Forrest- Pick up the damn grocery bag
•••
Jake- Do you remember the plan if I ever get attacked and fall down?
Eunchan- Of course
Jake- Tell me
Eunchan- In the case you are ever being attacked, as you fall to the ground I am to say MMMMM WHATCHA SAY~ no matter the circumstances
Jake- Good, I'll do the same for you
•••
Eunchan- What if food had people names and people had food names?
Jake- It's time for dinner, spaghetti
Eunchan- What are we having?
Jake- Dean
Dean- Don't drag me into this
Jake- Shut up potato
•••
Rowan, with his foot stuck in a chair- You might be wondering, "Rowan how'd you get your foot stuck in that chair?"
Rowan- Well, kids Rowan doesn't fucking know either
•••
Jimmy- Do you what to hear the good news or the bad news first..?
Jack- Good news?
Jimmy-
Jimmy- It's very unlikely I'll do it again..
•••
Alex, seething at Gerard- How do you politely tell someone you want to hit them in the face with a brick?
Gray- One wishes to acquaint your facial features with a fundamental item used in building walls repeatably
Alex-
Gerard-
Alex- MARRY ME-
•••
Alex- I have discovered that I am indeed a morosexual
Ben- Hey Gogo, do you think if I put a fork in the microwave it'd create a mini thunderstorm?
Alex, stripping- Ben you complete and utter buffoon
•••
Jake- Shout-out to my parents for making the most perfect kid ever!
Dean- Damn, congratulations to Kenny
•••
Eunchan- Can we visit a haunted house?
Dean- What's wrong with the one we live in?
Eunchan- Wait-wHaT-
Dean- *slowly closes his bedroom door*
•••
Jimmy- Ya know what people always ask me?
Kingsley- "Will you please leave the premises"?
•••
Gray- You two want to explain how you crashed the car?
Alex- Well we were driving and there was this deer in the middle of the road Ben couldn't see so I yelled "Ben deer!"
Ben-
Alex- You want to tell him what your response was?
Ben- "Yes honey?"
•••
Dean- Go lie down you're sick
Jake- If I was sick could I do this??
Dean-
Jake-
Dean- Do what?
Jake- cartwheels, am I not doing them?
•••
Wolf- I'm 30% exhaustion, 50% bitch, 10% sarcasm and 20% don't care
Kingsley- That's 110%
Wolf- 20% don't care
Kingsley- I should've seen that coming
•••
Dean- *wakes up in the middle of the night to see Jake only an inch away from his face*
Jake- so we had this id-stop screaming- so we had this idea
Dean- we???
Eunchan, popping up beside Jake- we had this idea-
Dean, backing away- Oh dear God there's two of them..
•••
Eunchan- Any song can be depressing if you try hard enough
Jake- 🎶 Where do we come from? Where do we go? Where do we come from? 🎶
Jake, whispering dramatically- 🎶 Cotton eye Joe...🎶
Dean- You need help
•••
Alex- Ben, if I died how much would you miss me?
Ben- Gogo, it's funny how you think death can get you out of this relationship
•••
Ben- *screams*
Alex- *screams louder to establish dominance*
Rowan- *joins in*
Gerard- Should we stop them?
Teddy- No I wanna see who looses their voice first
•••
Gerard- Hello officer is there a problem?
Policeman- I'm sorry sir but you can't drive a motorcycle with three people on it I'm afraid I'm gonna have to take you all in.
Alex- Wait- Three???
Teddy & Rowan- Ben fell off!!!
•••
Jake- Wolf won't come out of his room
Grape- Tell him I said something
Jake- Like what?
Grape- Anything factually incorrect
Wolf, a few minutes later- SAM DID YOU SAY THE SUN WAS A FUCKING PLANET????