Not all of us have perfect vine references, CHRISTOPHER

Part Eight

Gray- Why are there scratch marks all over you?

Teddy- *flashbacks to when he tried to pet a raccoon even though Gray told him not to*

Teddy- I killed Rowan.

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Grape,out in public- If someone looks at me for more then 10 seconds I will cry

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[Band au]

Random bish- You are by far the worst band I've heard of!

Ben- But you've heard of us

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Timothy- Eunchan is at that level of extra where he would do a vertical split against the wall to tie his shoelaces

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Jake, walking in with sunglasses on- Do these sunglasses make my head look fat?

Wolf- No, your fat head makes your head look fat

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Ben- Gogo your bleeding out! What's your blood type????

Gogo- B positive

Ben- I'm trYING BUT YOUR BLEEDING OUT

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Jake, laying in a hospital bed about to get his appendix removed- If I do die during this can you one thing for me?

Dean- Sure...?

Jake, grabbing Dean's collar- Blow up the fucking hospital

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Wolf- Next time I open up to someone it's gonna be my fucking autopsy

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Jake, knocking on Wolf's door- Hey

Wolf, opening the door- What?

Jake- I can't sleep

Wolf- I can, goodnight *closes door*

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Dean- Why is the apartment on fire???

Eunchan- In my defence, Jake was supposed to supervise me

Jake- In my defence, I was left unsupervised

Dean- oh my god

•••

Wolf- You have no idea what I'm capable off.

Donald- No offence, but I feel like I'm being threatened by a cupcake with glasses

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Dance Instructor- Hello! And welcome to our first Salsa Lesson!!

Ben, standing at the back with a bag of tortilla chips- You guys tricked me!

Alex and Gerard- Come on, it'll be fun!

Ben, sadly eating a chip- How could you two betray me like this?

•••

Jake- What's wrong?

Wolf- I was trying to shed a year of happiness but, my heart's too dry

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Teddy- Your giving me a sticker?

Rowan- Not just any sticker! This is a sticker with a cat saying "Me-Wow"

Teddy- I'm not a preschooler

Rowan, sighing- Fine I'll take it back-

Teddy, hissing- BACK OFF! I EARNED THIS STICKER!

•••

Jake- Ya know, wolf probably sold his soul to the devil for his good looks

Jimmy- And the demon still ripped him off

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Gogo- How is it that you get into atleast one chicken related fight every year???

Ben- ....

•••

Wolf- I just ended a four year relationship

Jake- Oh, Are you alright man?

Wolf- huh? Oh, yeah it wasn't MY relationship

Jack, in the background- I'M BREAKING UP WITH YOU JIMMY-!

Jake- ....

•••

Ben, throwing rocks at Gogo's window- hey, hEY HEY

Gogo- YOU HAVE A PHONE FOR A REASON

Ben- Oh yeah!

*Loud Thunk*

Gogo- diD YOU JUST THROW YOUR FUCKING PHONE AT MY WINDOW????

•••

Gogo, explaining his injuries to Ben- IT WASN'T THAT BAD! The doctor said all my bleeding was INTERNAL that's where the blood is SUPPOSED to BE

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Alex, shuffling through the med kit- whY WOULD YOU FILL IN WITH CHEETOS????

Ben, bleeding out- I THOUGHT it was FUNNY at the TIME

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Wolf, thinking about leaving the union- I have decided that it is a bad idea, but I've also decided that I don't give a flying fuck

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Jimmy- You know what's overrated? Pants.

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Rowan- When I die can you make sure I become a BuzzFeed unsolved case?

Teddy- What?

Rowan- I want to be on Buzzfeed unsolved

Teddy- Can we go back to the part where you get murdered?

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Kingsley- I am not mad, I just want to know why you needed a fake ID

Jake- *mumbles*

Kingsley- What?

Jake- You need to be over 18 to hold the puppies at Petco

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Kingsley- What are you? Twelve?

Ghost- On a scale of one to ten, yes

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Rowan- Vegatable oil is made from vegatables, coconut oil is made from coconuts, so does that mean baby oil-

Eugene- Can't we have a nice dinner ONCE????

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Grape- Everything is alright

Forrest- How can you say that??

Grape- Because sometimes when shit gets tough, denial is all we have

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Jake- Don't worry I have a permit

Dean- This says "I can do whatever I want"

Jake, finger guns- And Don't you forget it!