April 28, 2019.
♛
It was about time he did that. It was something that was in his mind for a long time now, and he wasn't going to procrastinate any longer.
He was finally going to let his family know that he wasn't straight, and he didn't like girls like they thought he would. Not that they were pressuring him to get a girlfriend or something, he just felt guilty for not letting his loved ones know, even when he was fully ready to show his real self outside.
Since his family was planning to move to their hometown for a few weeks the next day, Jeongguk figured it was the best he said it now.
And there he was, just about to leave from his home, while his boyfriend was being a bit nervous than himself, sitting beside him inside the car.
"Don't worry, I'll drop you at the company and then-"
"I'm not worried about that!" Taehyung exclaimed, "You're now going to... come out- Jeongguk, why not come out together? Like the both of us, to your parents."
Jeongguk looked taken aback by that question.
"No, we'll do that someday," he refused immediately.
"Why?" The elder said, unable to cover the pout in his face, "Do you not like-"
"What? No, I didn't mean it like that," he sighed, "I just don't want to force you into anything, that you're not comfortable or not sure of. And besides, I don't know how well my parents are gonna take this information, and I don't want to reveal that I'm already in a relationship with a guy, at the same time."
Taehyung stared into nothing, before taking a deep breath and nodding his head.
"You're right, they'd be overwhelmed."
"Exactly, and above all of it, you're very important to me, love," he said, patting his head softly, "And ask yourself for a second, if you're ready. If you are, perfect. If you're not, no problem. Just because I'm okay with it, doesn't mean you have to, okay?"
The elder did nothing but hum at that, because no matter how much he wanted to be there for Jeongguk during this important thing, deep down his mind, he knew he wasn't really fully ready.
And sometimes, he was thankful that Jeongguk could read him like an open book, because most of the times, Taehyung didn't have to explain his feelings to his boyfriend, which he was really bad at.
It just seemed like, Jeongguk understood him perfectly.
"What are you thinking, Tae?" His voice brought the elder out of his track of thoughts as he turned to his right side, only to see Jeongguk looking at him questioningly, with a concerned face.
"You zoned out," he whispered, before ruffling his hair softly.
"I was just thankful for having a wonderful boyfriend," Taehyung beamed at him, "And a hot one at that."
"I could say the same about you then," Jeongguk answered cockily, before turning the car on, "Hot and sexy."
A low laugh escaped Taehyung's mouth at that sentence, as the younger one started the vehicle.
A sound that soothed Jeongguk.
None of the words were shared between them after that, a comfortable silence surrounding them smoothly. Jeongguk had a small smile in his face, though his heart was beating a bit faster, and his mind was travelling even more --- thinking about his parents' reaction.
He just hoped that nothing would go wrong, or he'd be harshly rejected, because no matter how mentally strong he was, no matter how much he was ready sacrifice anything for his relationship, he still needed parents' love and support for he who was.
.
.
.
"Jeongguk?" His brother, Junghyun blinked in surprise to see the younger one standing in the doorstep., given that he didn't give any heads up that he was visiting, which he cursed himself in the mind, real quick.
"Hey, hyung," he greeted casually, before entering inside and kicking his footwear off.
Junghyun watched his younger brother sit on the couch, before taking the newspaper lying on the nightstand, glancing it.
"What's with the surprise visit?" He asked, before going to the kitchen, and getting him a bottle of water.
"Why? Can't I come?" Jeongguk scoffed playfully, looking around the living room, to see how suitcases were lying around, with half packed stuff here and there.
Of course, they were leaving Seoul that night.
Junghyun just rolled his eyes at his brother's comment, before picking up the clothes which were left on the floor, before folding it just like that, and placing it in the opened baggage in one corner.
"Didn't you wash that?" Jeongguk scoffed.
"I did," the elder said, in an offended tone.
"Jeongguk!" His father exclaimed at his younger son, genuinely surprised that he was there, since nobody was expecting him.
"Hey dad, done packing?" He asked, before getting up, giving a brief hug.
"Does it look like it's done packing?" His bother shook his head, muttering.
And for that second, just for a second, Jeongguk thought that he should back off, at that time. They were all obviously too busy with packing up and travelling, and what might happen when he just broke down the news like a bomb.
"Honey, you didn't say you were coming!" His mother came running to him before wrapping her arms around him, lovingly, "Ah, I would've cooked something if you told me-"
"Not a very special visit, mom," he lied, "Just wanted to see you before you all go to Busan... but," he said, his heart skipping a beat at that single word.
"Yes, Gguk?" She asked, patting his head slightly, adjusting the hair before moving outside and picking up Gureum, and closing the door.
Jeongguk didn't answer her at once, as he just sat on the chair, fiddling with his fingers for a second, before looking up at his family members, who were looking at him expectantly.
"I came to tell something really important, too," he said slowly, making his mother frown slightly. She was getting worried, looking at the nervous expression of her son.
"What happened? Is anything wrong?" Mr. Jeon said, sitting on the couch immediately, opposite to where Jeongguk were seated, so that he could see his face, and the fact that he never saw him so nervous and hesitant caught him my surprise.
"Hyung, come sit here, and you too mom. I'll just... say it together, to everyone," he sighed, looking at both of them, as they took a seat on the couch, with confusion written clearly all over their faces.
"You're really worrying me now, Jeongguk-ah," Junghyun stated, the younger one taking a deep sigh at that.
He knew, he knew that he was worrying them, and honestly? All the confidence he had these times till now, seemed like disappeared into nothing, as if it wasn't even there. He bit his lips softly, not knowing how to bring out the topic of gay out of the blue, and not having any idea whether his family was homophobic, made him even more nervous.
"I really don't know how to say this, and I don't even know if it's a right time to bring this out, but... I think I should let you know, as your son, and your brother," he breathed out, his eyes still casting a bit downwards, not meeting their eyes, "But honestly, please promise me that... I don't know. No matter what I'm saying right now, and no matter how drastic it might be, things between us shouldn't change."
"What do you mean, things between us, Jeongguk? We are family," his mother frowned.
"I know, I know all of that, but I... just want to reassure myself. Because what I'm saying now, has a possibility of that too," he said, "So, can't you just promise me? For my sake?"
"I promise you, Gguk," his father said immediately, "I don't know why you're hesitating so much, son. But I can promise you that, we'll always be family, nothing will change that."
"Good," he breathed.
Silence surrounded them after that, the other three of them waiting for the youngest one to say something, yet Jeongguk was struggling to put it in words. He was stuttering mentally so much, and he was afraid that he'd mess the whole thing up if he opened his mouth.
"Son?"
"I'm gay."
There.
He said it. Except that no one knew the mental breakdown he was having at that moment. He thought of discussing the issue with them first, and get into the main topic slowly and gradually, but there, he just said it... so abruptly.
Jeongguk didn't dare lift his head and look at any one of them, at least. His heartbeat picking up the pace, his eyelids getting heavy with tears forming in the back, he was getting so fucking anxious at the silence he was receiving.
Until, Jeongguk's mother broke it.
"I'm sorry, what?"
Yeah, he knew he was fucked.
.
.
.
The first thing the maknae did after leaving his house was, to go and see Taehyung. He was told that the elder one would be in their dorm, till evening, since he was free for the day. Well... mostly. He may or may not made the day purposefully off from his work, for Jeongguk.
He was eating sandwich, sitting on the floor, while going through Weverse in his phone, when he heard the door open.
Jeongguk's expression was unreadable, as he saw Taehyung sitting in the living room, straight from the door. The younger one felt the other looking at him a bit wide eyed, expecting something, but he just removed his footwear, and placing his car keys on the nightstand, without saying anything.
"Jeongguk-ah," he heard his boyfriend call, but he didn't respond to it immediately.
"Yeah?" He responded a few seconds later, sitting on the couch, and before he could think of anything or... just do anything, Taehyung sat beside him, and pulling the younger one within his arms, "What-"
He was cut off the next second, when the blue haired male pressed his lips against his, pressing for a few moments, before pulling away and cupping his cheeks.
"Didn't they accept you? Is that why you look sad?" He whispered, caressing his cheeks softly.
"I won't say that but... they were shocked, indeed," the younger one sighed, pouting, "I knew they would be, but something in me feels weird... but I don't know like, they didn't reject me or such. But they didn't say that they accept me either, you get what I mean?"
"Of course, baby," he cooed at him, before smooching his face full of kisses, wanting Jeongguk to not overthink on that, "But they didn't use... any vulgar-"
"Nope, Tae," Jeongguk laughed, "Nothing like that, don't worry. They were taken aback, which I completely understand. But they said that they'll... you know, call me soon, and talk about this."
Taehyung hummed.
"I was promised that no matter what, we'll always be family. I asked for it before revealing it, so I think that... nothing devastating will happen? Yeah," he said, laughing slightly, while taking a deep breath, and relieving from the pressured mood.
"I'm sure you'll hear from them soon," he smiled at him, and the next moment, the younger just go so overwhelmed and confided in the other's arms hugging his torso tightly. Taehyung giggled at that, loving the attention he was getting, as he moved his hands up and down soothingly.
Jeongguk was home.
.
.
.
"Don't do that, you'll get hurt," the maknae whispered to the elder one, who was biting his lips harshly.
They were on a normal movie date, just a normal one, that night, and as far as Jeongguk noticed Taehyung, he was only biting his lips and looking... anxious. And the fact that they weren't even watching any horror movie confused him the most.
He watched as the elder one opened his mouth for a second to say something, but he shut it immediately, making Jeongguk confused more than ever.
"What's wrong, hyung?" The maknae asked, obviously concerned, "Don't bite your lips too much. It's gonna hurt later, okay?"
Taehyung nodded, but didn't open his mouth and say anything else, earning a small inaudible sigh from the latter. He suddenly pulled the elder one within his arms, making him sit in between his legs, holding him closer to his chest, leaning his chin on one of his shoulders.
Jeongguk nuzzled his nose against the latter's bare neck, tightening his grip, planting soft kisses. He heard Taehyung sigh softly at that sensation, leaning back against himself.
"Hyung," he whispered, and both of them knew that the movie was long forgotten, "You know I love you, right?"
"More than anything," the elder replied immediately. Because it was true. Maybe... that was the only thing he was so sure of.
"That's a relief," Jeongguk sighed, "But... what's bothering you hyung?" He asked softly, hugging him closer, and just right.
I don't know too, Jeongguk-ah.
"Nothing's really wrong... Just tired and stressed, I guess," Taehyung answered, with a small smile in his face.
Jeongguk knew he was lying, at least partially, but decided to let go at the moment, and just focus on making Taehyung feel loved and perfect. Continuing to pepper him with small kisses, they were just lying there, downside the couch, with the movie left all alone.
(^the movie be feeling single like the rest of us :'D)
And just for a second, just for... that moment, Taehyung was terrified that Jeongguk could read him like an open book.
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Having a meeting early in the morning, next day, all seven of them were present in the company as soon as possible.
Taehyung and Jeongguk weren't sitting next to each other, and maybe that was intentional. They weren't always together in the company, during work, and especially after a photo leaking out, they decided it was for the best, to not make their relationship more obvious than it already was.
Soon enough, the meeting started, and thankfully enough to both the maknaes, the manager didn't open his mouth about anything that happened in the past days, just came and started their day as usual.
Discussing about the promotional activities, which lasted for three weeks, including all the shows, interviews and performances, all their attention was completely on work and nothing else.
Taehyung was staring into nothing, listening to whatever their manager was saying, and the leader, Namjoon discussing along, with other members giving their opinions and ideas. He didn't really take part in the conversation, but he was keenly taking in the essential information needed.
Jeongguk looked at the elder, glancing at somewhere constantly, for a moment before turning to the staffs, giving them a small smile and continued talking, though it had caught his mind how Taehyung was so close to zoning out of the conversation.
Usually, Taehyung would be the mood maker during every meeting, and now that he was so silent with his own thoughts, Jeongguk was... shocked inside. And worried.
"Tae?" Jimin called for the third time, when Taehyung had to come out of his mind, to respond to the latter.
"Sorry, I zoned out. You were saying?" He asked, sitting upright.
Jimin snickered slightly, before taking once again, but Jeongguk couldn't let go of this, this time. Not only because of just this incident, he was occupied with how anxious Taehyung was, for no reason, and how he had been getting nightmares, lacking the sleep he need.
The maknae took his phone from his pocket, before texting the latter in a swift motion.
Me
you okay?
Jeongguk watched as the elder one's phone vibrate, in his pocket. He looked at him intently, as Taehyung typed back a reply, before looking at him subtly and focusing in the front once again.
My lifeline ❤️💫
I'm okay, baby.
The younger one looked at Taehyung once, only to see him keeping a straight face, looking at the manager. It was as if he knew that Jeongguk would be looking at him. He sighed, before switching off his phone once again, and getting to work, the next moment.
But why do I feel like he's lying?
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Phew, it took three days for me to write this chapter lmao. But it was worth it, I think? Until next time!
Happy reading~
(^-^)