Shahrukh kept looking at the watch hanged on the wall in his office every now and then, wanting the day to end quickly to go to the hospital and see Kajol. He didn't wait for breakfast at home, he just rushed to the company in the early morning before anybody sees him and before Poja's daily drama. Finally, the day ended and he got out of his office.
Rani was already there as he got a message from her in the morning, telling him that she went to Kajol; because she kept whining over the phone and telling her that she got bored of the hospital, and they will wait for him to check her out. He rode his car and drove to the hospital.
'come in' Kajol said happily when the door was knocking, Shahrukh came in and Kajol ran to his way and hugged him
'how are you?' he asked happily hugging her back
'feeling great' she said pulling back
'I really missed you' he said passing his palm over her hair
'me too' she kissed his cheek
'I see you are already dressed and ready to go back home'
She nodded 'yeah' she said then sighed and sat down at the couch
He sat next to her and smiled sadly, she looked at him and held his hand 'I can't wait to go home, yet I am so scared of mom'
'I won't let her send you away, no matter what. Let's just think about your health now, okay?' he said looking at her in the eyes and smiling, but the smile didn't reach his eyes
'are you okay?' she asked suspiciously narrowing her eyes
He blew 'I have a very bad feeling since I woke up today'
'that's because I wasn't home' she said jokingly placing her palm over his cheek and he smiled and shook his head 'where is Amira by the way?' she asked
'what?' he asked
'I thought she would come with you' Kajol said shrugging
'where is Rani?'
'she is paying the hospital'
'so, she didn't come with her?' he asked in a worried tone
'no Shahrukh, Rani has been here for hours. She may have gone home after college, and she already know that I am coming home today' she smiled nervously yet trying to calm him down
Rani opened the door and came in; she was glad that Shahrukh arrived and they will finally take whining Kajol back home 'you are here' she said smiling
'yeah, let's go' Kajol said and stood up but Shahrukh just took out his phone and called Amira but he couldn't reach her, her phone was turned off 'maybe her battery died as usual' she said trying to reassure him
'Rani, did she call you today?' Shahrukh asked shaking his leg and still trying to call again
'no, she didn't' Rani replied 'calm down Shahrukh'
Kajol's heart started beating very fast, she prayed that she just misunderstood the situation and what came her mind was wrong, she kept rubbing her hands nervously yet breathing slowly; trying to calm down to not grab attention, but her last conversation with Abhishik kept echoing in her ear.
Shahrukh finally gave up calling his sister 'okay fine, let's go. Are you sure you didn't forget anything?'
Kajol nodded in denial at once 'we have everything with us'
Kajol kept her eyes on the window next to her in the car, Shahrukh didn't get the energy to talk about anything because he was worried for his sister. Rani was in her car and she promised to try calling his sister herself when he promised her that he will just focus on driving.
'her car is here' Kajol said and gave a relieved sigh when she saw the car when they were parking and thanked god many times in her head. Shahrukh blew in anger and shook his head 'there was no need to scare all of us' she said reassuring to him
'thank god' he said turning off the engine 'welcome home' he said smiling to Kajol
'thank you' Kajol said and they both got off the car and saw Rani parking her car, then she also got off her car 'she is home' Kajol said to Rani and gestured to the car
Rani sighed 'I hope there will be no whining anymore' she said sarcastically to Kajol while they were walking towards the house
'with mom in the house, no guarantees' Kajol replied in boredom 'I really need to wash up and jump to bed, I couldn't sleep well in the hospital, yet I want to see dad, I haven't seen him for two days'
'don't worry, I am sure your mom set up everything' Shahrukh said sarcastically
'that what scares me' Kajol said sadly 'let's just go to our rooms, sleep and think about nothing'
'I agree with you' Rani said supporting 'the two past days have been tough'
'I pray nobody stops us and we go safely to our rooms' Shahrukh said helplessly opening the door and all came in
'I think they are asleep' Kajol whispered and they all walked slowly to Kajol's room
'I will go to my room and you please do the same and let her rest' Rani said and Shahrukh rolled his eyes
'no problem, I will see you in the morning' Kajol said sweetly
'fine' Shahrukh said and smiled 'good night' he said and both girls replied then he headed towards his room.
"My dear brother Shahrukh,
I know that you will hate me after you finish reading this letter, but I don't blame you.
I am so sorry but I had to do it, there was no other way out; I had to leave this house. Yes I ran away and I am not alone, Abhishik also ran away with me.
I know what I did isn't easy and it might break your heart, and I swear I didn't mean to. I did it because I really love you. What I did wasn't easy for me too, and god knows how miserable I am. Try to forgive me.
Please focus on your life; you really deserve a chance. You took care of me all these years -and I really appreciate it- that you forgot to take care of yourself. I did this for your own good and for Kajol too, you are meant to be together.
Take care of her, and that way you won't be torn between us; I have removed that burden which was over your shoulder.
Don't worry, I will never let Poja win over you, and you must do the same, you have to win. I wish I could see her face when she finds out that I left and destroyed all her dreams. I removed Abhishik and the Bachchans as much as I could, now it is your turn to make things work.
I don't think I will ever come back, but I hope things work out when I leave, I pray you marry Kajol, you both get a lot of kids and bring happiness to the house, a big happiness that wipes away all the sadness, all bad memories; even the memories I was in.
Don't look for me Shahrukh.
Your sister,
Amira"
Shahrukh found a new letter on his desk, he thought it is one of Kajol's letters and haven't noticed it earlier, or maybe she changed her mind and continued to write him letters anyway.
He opened the envelope smiling and started reading but his smile faded when he finished the letter. Kajol suddenly opened the door of his room, she was panting and also holding a letter. She gasped and her eyes widened when she saw him holding the letter.
He scrunched the letter in his hand and stormed out of the room while Kajol ran behind him.
He headed towards the store room and grabbed an old hockey stick and a bottle of drink, then he passed by the kitchen and got a box of matches. Kajol was following him helplessly not understanding what he is up to. Shahrukh got out of the house and ran to the parking and stood in front of his sister's car. He put the bottle and the matches on the ground, held the hockey stick with his both hands and started hitting the car from each side and broke the glass, the mirrors and lanterns of the car. Kajol couldn't step any closer to him or she would get hurt but at the same time she was scared of what Shahrukh was doing and doesn't want him to hurt himself.
After he finished hitting the car and spoiled how it looked and after everyone in the house including the kids woke up because of the sounds of the car, he threw the stick away, heavily panting and got the bottle. He kept spilling the drink over the car and its seats. Everyone stood scared and not understanding what is happening yet no one dared to ask. When Shahrukh finished the bottle, he threw it at the car smashing it then with five burning matches in his hand, he threw them at the car that started burning at once. Kajol let a scream and pulled Shahrukh from his hand away from the burning car. Poja ran inside to call the firefighters. Shahrukh walked away a few steps with Kajol then he sat on the floor watching the car burns and the fire going up. Kajol kneeled next to him and let his head rest on her chest while she kept crying and looking at the fire with horror.
"Dear Kajol, my best friend,
I am sorry I didn't say goodbye, I know that you think I am crazy and maybe what I did is not the best solution ever but it is better for all of us.
Abhishik told me about your conversation in the hospital, and that made me regret telling you about the whole thing and that's why I left suddenly. You had to be surprised just like Shahrukh or he would lose you too. He must not know that you knew about me running away, never Kajol.
Take care of Shahrukh, I know he hates me now and he will never forgive me but he needs you by his side; you are his future and I am his cursed past.
Kiss uncle for me, I feel sorry to disappoint him. Tell Rani and the kids that I will miss them.
Amira"
Rani got the first aid kit then she and Kajol started cleaning Shahrukh's wounds, his hands were really hurt with broken glass. He was just silent, not feeling anything; not even the wounds in his hands.
'how dare she? How did she do this?' Poja yelled when they were in the sitting room 'how could she run with your fiancé?' she asked Kajol
'Abhishik isn't my fiancé, and he never was' Kajol replied calmly placing bandages to Shahrukh's hand
'where were you? How could you let her run away?' Poja shouted at Anarkali
'I haven't seen her I swear, I found two envelopes at my room and a note to put them in the rooms at night, I thought it was a surprise for them' Anarkali replied trembling
'it is a surprise indeed, and a very bad one. It is a scandal' she yelled again 'Arjit call the police, we have to find this girl'
'no, I won't; she made her choice' Arjit said sadly 'but I am so disappointed with her'
'dad, for god's sake' Kajol said blaming 'mom is the reason the girl ran away'
Poja replied 'it is my fault from the beginning to bring such filthy creatures to my house' she said then looked at Arjit 'If you won't call the police, I will; and you won't like it'
'mom don't, she isn't a thief or a killer to call the police for, she is family' Kajol stood up and said confidently
'this girl isn't part of the family anymore, I hate her' Poja yelled
Rani cleared her throat 'I don't think that calling the police is a good idea' she said
'why?' Poja asked placing her palms over her hips
'I don't mean to think bad of her, but she already ran away with Abhishik and... they might have got ... married' she swallowed and continued 'so calling the police will cause unneeded scandal'
Poja was dumbstruck 'oh my god, Rani you might be right' she said placing her palms over her head
'scandal or no scandal, no one will call the police. That's final' Arjit said firmly
'you are proud of what she did aren't you? Don't act disappointed. Why do you keep protecting this pathetic love story of them' Poja asked angrily
'because they are lucky to have each other, they are happy together; unlike me, that's why I am on their side, not yours' Arjit said coldly and went out
'I won't leave you or your sister alone, I will ruin your lives' Poja threatened looking at Shahrukh
'mom please, that's enough' Kajol shouted 'leave him alone'
'what did I do in my life to be punished by the heavens with a stupid daughter like you?' Poja asked in disgust
'who knows?' Kajol asked sarcastically in a cold tone but Poja suddenly slapped her. Kajol placed her palm over her cheek and looked at her mother coldly without shedding a tear.
'that girl had no parents to raise her in a good way but you still have ones, Kajol. Don't you dare talk to me like that ever again' Poja said firmly and went out of the room
'are you okay?' Rani asked sadly
'don't worry about me' Kajol replied smilingly reassuring then kneeled in front of Shahrukh 'Shahrukh can you hear me?' she placed her hand over his hand but he was still looking in the space, she gently moved his face to hers but she regretted doing that; his empty eyes were scarier and stronger than her mother's slap. Kajol swallowed and tried to get herself together.
'are you okay?' she asked and he just gave her a short nod. She looked at his hand and found that he still had the letter with him, she tried to open his grip but he stiffened it more and Kajol looked up helplessly at Rani
'we better take you to your room. Can you walk?' Rani asked kindly and he stood up silently, Kajol took his arm and they walked slowly out of the room.
'are you sure you want to stay alone with him?' Rani whispered when they were at the door of Shahrukh's room
'yes' Kajol whispered back
'I will get the syringe ready if something happened, okay?'
'perfect' she said and Rani left.
Kajol opened the door and took Shahrukh's hand and they went in. They were about to walk towards the bed but Shahrukh stopped and looked at his desk. He put Kajol's hand away gently and walked towards the desk and she followed him. He opened a drawer and took out a framed photo of his parents, his sister and him. Kajol knew he always kept it in the drawer to be kept safe as it was a very old one. He gently traced the faces in the photos and Kajol gave a sad smile.
'they all left me alone' Shahrukh barely whispered 'they abandoned me'
'Shahrukh...' Kajol couldn't complete her sentence as Shahrukh suddenly threw the framed photo at the wall smashing it into pieces startling her. He kept stepping over the shattered broken glass with his shoe and breaking it into smaller pieces and spoiling the photo.
Shahrukh also tore the letter that was in his hand into pieces still mumbling the same words, then he took other photos that were in his drawer and started tearing them as well.
'Shahrukh calm down please' Kajol said pleading
'I couldn't keep them by my side, they just left like this' Shahrukh said still talking irrationally 'everyone is leaving me. They abandoned me'
Kajol managed to find her voice 'Rani' she called with a breaking voice
'you are next, right?' he asked looking at her suspiciously
'what?' she asked widening her eyes
'you are leaving me next, am I right?' he shouted
Kajol nodded in denial 'no my dear, I won't leave you' she placed her palms over his cheeks
'you will leave me like they did. Nobody wants me' he said with a breaking voice, tears forming in his eyes and they kneeled on the ground
'never say that again' she said and kissed his lips 'I love you so much' she said and he hugged her tight. A few seconds and his head rested on her shoulder and his hands touched the ground breaking the hug 'Shahrukh' Kajol said in a terrified tone
'it is okay' Rani said calming her down. Kajol looked back at her, saw the syringe in her hand leaving Shahruk's bare arm and let out a relieved sigh 'let's take him to his bed' she said to Kajol; they both took his arms and lead him to the bed.
'he won't wake up until tomorrow in the noon, maybe after that. There is no need to stay beside him all night' Rani said standing next to Kajol who sat in front of Shahrukh
Kajol passed her fingers through Shahrukh's hair 'it is like the first day his parents died. When I went to see him at the hospital with my dad, he was just like that. Unconscious, broken, helpless and shocked. All that appeared on his face in his sleep. Dad told me that the first name he called was his sister's when he opened his eyes, not his mom's nor his father's'
'the next days will be tough, we need to be by his side more than any time' Rani said then took a deep breath and added 'we should keep him from any sharp tools; just in case' she said and Kajol looked up at her in horror then looked at the smashed glass on the floor 'don't worry, I will call Anarkali. Now come with me' Rani said gently to Kajol and they walked quietly out of the room.
'why don't we go to my room and chat like old days?' Rani asked sweetly
Kajol smiled and nodded 'normally, people at these situations don't have the energy to speak but on the opposite; I really want to talk. Let's go' she said and held her arm and got into Rani's room, they sat over the bed and pulled the blanket over them.
Rani sighed 'we thought that Preity was the craziest one in this house' she said sadly
'yeah' Kajol replied with a half-smile
'I will miss her; she shouldn't have left like that'
'I am fuming, my hunger strike is nothing compared to what she did to Shahrukh' she blew 'I will miss her too yet I am so angry with her' Kajol said angrily
'but she thought that things will be fixed when she removes Abhishik from your path' Rani said nicely
'and she removed herself from Shahrukh's life as well' Kajol said and sighed
Rani rose her eyebrows 'you were defending her downstairs, what happened now? did you hate her for what she did?'
Kajol clicked her tongue then ran her fingers through her hair 'I feel like she betrayed us, all of us. I won't even dare to mention her name ever again in front of Shahrukh, she stole that right from me. I won't be able to even remember her when I am alone; even if she did this for my own good'
'don't be so sure, we know she broke his heart and let us down, but sooner or later we will forgive her; her intentions were good' Rani said calmly
Kajol blew sadly 'I don't know Rani, I just didn't bear it when they talked about her like that, yet I can't decide how I really feel about her. All I know now that I am angry'
Rani smirked 'I think that my prayers don't get accepted anymore'
'why are you saying this?'
'I remember that I talked with Shahrukh, when he was angry with me before Preity gets married. I prayed he never feel what I felt or be in the same situation ever; but it is so obvious that all the gods are mad at me' Rani said sadly
'don't talk about yourself like this' Kajol said sweetly leaning her head to Rani's shoulder 'speaking about Preity, did you get the time to think about what you would do about her issue yet?'
She chuckled 'I don't even get the time to scratch my head'
'everyone in this house is drained' Kajol said sadly 'I can't get Shahrukh's look out of my mind, his empty eyes. She broke his heart' she said
'I am so scared for him'
'me too Rani, you have no idea' she said then the memory of the first day Shahrukh and his sister came to live with them hit her.
'come in, don't be shy' Arjit said sweetly 'you have already visited this house many times'
'welcome home son' Poja said smiling 'come on in, you aren't a stranger' she said kindly
Shahrukh was holding a bag in one hand, and holding his sister's hand with his other hand, they came in slowly and Kajol clapped happily 'welcome home cousins' she walked towards them and held their hands 'I am so happy that you will live with us'
'thank you Kaj' Shahrukh replied sweetly
'you are most welcome' she said and looked at his sister 'where is my hug you girl?' she said playfully and the two girls hugged then they pulled back and Kajol spoke again 'your rooms are ready, and guess what; they are very close to mine' she said and giggled
'that is so generous of you' Shahrukh said with a broken smile
'don't say that, this is your house; just as us. There is no difference' Kajol said reassuring
'Kajol is right, I don't want you to speak like this ever again. We are family' Poja said sweetly
'Rani and Preity would come too when they come back to India; we are going to have so much fun' Kajol said encouraging
'enough chatting Kajol, they must be tired' Poja said blaming
'let me show you the rooms' Kajol said energetically and pulled Shahrukh's and they all went upstairs
'what are you thinking of?' Rani asked suddenly interrupting her train of memories
Kajol smirked 'I remembered the first day Shahrukh came to live with us. How his arms were wrapped tightly around his sister as if he was protecting her from the whole world, his short sentences and how things seemed pretty easy' she sighed 'I remember jumping around both of them trying to make them laugh. It took years until they felt better, but today thanks to her, we are back on the very first day; just like that' she shook her head helplessly
'this time you are not alone' Rani smiled and held her hand
'thank god you are here' Kajol said sweetly
'that is what family is for' she said kindly
Kajol kept turning in bed all night, hours passed but she couldn't sleep for even a minute. She cried herself to sleep remembering all what happened in the day but in vain. She sat up and grabbed the letter that was over her nightstand and read it again. As she was sad and heartbroken to see Shahrukh feeling down, left behind and depressed; she also felt sad for her best friend that left without saying goodbye just leaving a piece of paper thinking that this was enough. She remembered all their memories, their late-night talks and their laughs. She thought about the fact that they might not meet again, and if it happened it won't be the same as it was in the past; she can't predict how Shahrukh would react. She knew he would never harm his sister, but it won't be an easy meeting.
Kajol remembered that it is Sunday, so she doesn't have to worry about going to college; she can't leave Shahrukh, not on his first day after all what happened. She remembered what Rani told her and she found that she has a lot of time until Shahrukh wakes up.
Kajol thought of going outside her room but she changed her mind, she now had no energy to speak to anybody about anything. Even after her talk with Rani, she still felt alone. Kajol shook her head and let out a short laugh, there was only one thing to do and she was surprised that she would do it without being asked to do it by anyone; she got off her bed and walked to her desk. 'I can't believe it' she sat down and started studying.
She doesn't know how long she have been reading and writing down notes, she stayed like that until sleep finally visited her eyes, she had no energy to go back to bed so she just leaned her head over the desk and closed her eyes.
'oh my god!' Preity said nearly dropping her jaw, she was sitting around the table having breakfast in the kitchen with Kajol and Rani
'yes, she ran away' Kajol said sadly
'I didn't expect Am...' Preity was interrupted by Kajol who kept clicking her tongue and looking at the kitchen door making sure Shahrukh doesn't come in suddenly; then Preity continued 'okay, fine. I didn't expect "her" to do that... that's not her at all'
'nothing is clear, that just came to her mind and she did it without even thinking' Rani said explaining
'I am so proud of her' Preity said happily and clapped
'sorry?' Kajol asked raising an eyebrow
'don't get me wrong, but finally I am not the only one who followed my heart' Preity said proudly
'Preity, we aren't here to discuss if it was a decision out of romance or not. You should have seen Shahrukh yesterday; you won't be jumping happily celebrating what your cousin did' Kajol said blaming
Preity bit her lower lip sadly 'I am sure he is so upset with her, but she followed her heart after all' she said and shrugged 'wait a minute. How could you be so cruel on your best friend? You should be defending her more not the opposite'
Kajol sighed sadly 'the result of her decision -even with good intentions- wasn't easy at all. I am hurt too Preity. I really miss her and I am sad she left. She followed her heart and broke hearts also' she said then sipped some water
'let's talk about you. Where did your heart take you when you followed it?' Rani asked coldly
'Rani!' Kajol said blaming
'just a minute Kajol' Rani said then continued 'why didn't you tell me about the divorce papers thing?'
'it is my private life Rani' Preity said firmly 'things will be okay'
'so why did Saif come to Shahrukh and tell him? Things don't seem okay'
'Preity I am with Rani this time, why didn't you tell us? Why do you keep acting normal?' Kajol asked kindly
'because Rani keeps reminding me of my mistake whenever she gets a chance. She is always the angel that makes no mistakes. She keeps doing it over and over, yes Rani, you win; I am the dirtiest girl on earth. Are you happy now?' Preity said through her teeth
'I didn't mean what you understood' Rani said sadly 'I just want to help you'
'don't worry, everything will be okay' Kajol said gently and patted over Preity's shoulder 'Rani and Shahrukh will speak to Saif and fix everything'
'don't you dare speak to him. I don't need help, it is my life, my mistake and I have to deal with it alone' Preity replied angrily
'okay, calm down please' Rani said kindly
'no, I won't. Why are you treating my life as if it was a chess game?' Preity said and looked at confused Kajol, Preity rolled her eyes 'I meant Rani and Shahrukh not you Kajol'
Rani clicked her tongue sadly 'why are you saying this?'
'stop controlling other people's lives saying you protect them, trying your best to prevent us from making mistakes is a mistake itself, and then you blame us for how we behave and do later'
'I agree with Preity, and I already spoke with Shahrukh about that' Kajol said
'fine, I give up. I am sorry Preity' Rani said helplessly
Preity bit her lower lip 'you promise you won't talk to Saif, okay?'
Rani nodded 'I promise'
'Promise that Shahrukh won't speak to him too' Preity asked, still feeling suspicious
'don't worry, Shahrukh is out of service; he won't be able to talk about anything for some time' Kajol said and smirked 'I pray he can get himself together first' Kajol said hopelessly
'he is choosing the tough way to deal with things, he only has to use his heart to understand her choice -okay she did it for noble things and all- but in the end, she followed her heart no matter what' Preity said happily
'it is not that easy Preity, we are afraid to say her name even in our minds that he might hear it. We have no idea how he will react or behave in the next days' Rani said then stretched her lip
'you are not the only ones who are sad. Did you think about her? She did what she did for your own happiness, I bet she is so upset with her decision too. It is not easy thing for god's sake' Preity said and placed her palm over her cheek sadly
'since when you speak wisely like that?' Kajol asked sarcastically
'I am full of surprises' Preity said flipping away her hair
Kajol blew 'it is still really early for noon' she said in and whined
'ugh, love is tough' Preity said to Kajol and winked 'when will you get married?'
'What?!' both Kajol and Rani asked in a shock
'yeah, what stops you anyway? Abh...ugh, no one is in Shahrukh's way, and your mom chose that very guy because of the business relationship thing. Now he is gone'
'um, what about mom herself?' Kajol said
'this girl hasn't learned anything from me or her cousin' Preity said making fun of Kajol
'Preity shut up' Rani said and shook her head
'okay fine, but if -by a miracle- your mom agreed and things went smooth; just imagine' Preity said sweetly
Kajol blushed then shook her head 'stop that nonsense' she said shyly
'oh my sweet shy cousin' Preity said and pulledKajol's cheek playfully