Live while we're young, Kiss you, Little things, C'mon C'mon, Last first kiss, Heart attack, Rock me, Change my mind, I would, Over again, Back for you, They don't know about us, Summer love and Nobody Compares and OBVIOUSLY What makes you beautiful.
For hours of crowd comedy, jokes and laughs, water fights and last but not least singing, the boys ran around stage and had the time of their lives- and yes, even though it could be exhausting and exhilarating at times.
23:07, a few minutes after their first show ended
Harrys POV:
The concerts just finished a few minutes ago. It was ecstatic. All of us are still high on adrenaline and endorphins. High on the masses of people, high on the loud bass beating in our hear and making the floor shake and quake. Lights and colors flattering in our eyes. Wow, live shows are truly a roller coaster. But as soon I remembered what will happen now, my mood dropped from 100 to 0. Shit... Urghhhhh.... I tried so hard to ignore the fact that Cheri and I have a 'date' after the show and the fact that Lou and I had yet another argument after I told him about the talk with Cheri at breakfast.
>>Flashback<<
"No, Harry! I don't want you going out with her. That's so unfair for fucks sake. You're mine! Bloody hell, no Harry! I don't want that!", he cried out waving his hands in the air gesturing like crazy and a crinkle in his forehead symbolizing his confusion and anger.
So cute. So hot. So sexy. So cute. So adorable.So lucky to have him. Harry! Shut up now and stay focused your in the midst of a crisis!
"I know, my love. But don't ever ever think she compares with you. Don't be absurd okay? Nobody compares to you and never will, duhh! And there is literally no meaning behind this shit. Don't act fucking stupid-", I tried calming him down but I was obviously not oblivious to the fact that when Louis William Tomlinson is angry nobody can get in his way.
"Me? Me fucking stupid? You're one to talk! Damn, you're really going out with her well aware of my insecurities. Are you trying to hurt or provoke me? Fucking hell! Fuck you! Fuck you for actually asking her out. I thought you were mine! Bloody fucking hell!", he yelled out and I shot him a warning look because we were arguing in the hotel lobby -a few feet away from the others- waiting for the bus to get us to the concert location. I reached out for his hand but he pulled away harshly. Okay now he was really getting on my nerves.
"This is so ironic bloody hell, Louis! It was your damn idea! Grow up, seriously. How often do I have to tell you that there is no, I mean absolutely NO interest in her and how fucking often do I have to reassure you that you're insecurities are unnecessary and wrong as shit? Damn! Must I really remind you that only a few hours ago this was your idea! What the fuck is your problem trying to pin this all on me? That's really unfair and uncalled for! Get a grip and stop making a scene. It's not like I will enjoy this date tonight? As if several hours of dancing around on stage in front of thousands of people aren't enough I have to go on a date with a girl I literally have no interest in and play pretend?! Don't you want to see it or are you truly that stupid, huh, Louis? I'm doing this all for us! I- I want us to be something- I want us to have a chance in this horrid and cruel world. I believe that we may have a chance. But only, and ONLY, if you trust me.", I shouted out.
"But you don't understand what you do to me when you hold her hand. We are meant to be-", I saw his pulse lighten and calm down though I also noticed a light tear rolling down from his eyes.
"Shhh, darling. Oh, love don't cry. Please. Shhhh. We ARE meant to be and I'm not doing this for you to walk away- cause we're on fire Lou, don't you feel it. I want us to be comfortable and free in the future, that's why I'm doing this. I don't want to care about what people say when we're together, you know I want to be the one to hold you in your sleep. I just want it to be you and I forever. I want us to be so happily.", I came closer and tilted my head: "So, trust me with her tonight?", I asked staring deeply into his blue.
"I guess." he looked down.
>>Flashback over<<
After 45 minutes backstage, removing all the makeup, hair products and essentials and changing into other clothes, I was the last to be in the changing rooms- Niall and Zayn were in the main room on their phones, Liam passed out on the couch and Louis was... I don't actually know to be honest.
Someone suddenly knocked on the door of my changing cabinet.
"Harry? You in there?", an innocent feminine voice asked. And no, it wasn't Lou. To my disappointment. It was her.
Yes, she was nice and cute and all but my mind constantly- without me even being able to control it- compared her to him. The almighty blue eyes of his. Her boring eyes without any kind of powerful light shining in them. His all consuming smile. Her superficial girly smile. His angelic and pure-hearted laughter. Her girly and over the top loud laughter. His scarred but yet kind soul. Her... well, I don't know how she really is. And I don't care. To be honest I couldn't give any less fucks about how her soul is. And I know what you're thinking, that I don't usually talk so harsh and disrespectful about woman- or actually anyone. But she makes me so angry. So so angry. And it's not really her, it's just her connection to Simon. That son of a bit-
"Hello, Harry?", Oh fuck! Totally forgot to respond.
"Um yeah, hi.", I monotonly answered.
"You all set to go? I am so excited hihi!", I practically felt her grin from ear to ear and I already got sick of it. For some reason her grinning felt kind of... unnatural and fake? Again, compared to Lou: his grin was cute and cute and cute and pure and honest and adorable and true and oh did I mention fuckable AS FUCK?
"Yeah, I'll be out in a minute.", I didn't respond to her last statement on purpose. But why would I? The deal was to go on a date and she wouldn't call Simon and she didn't, soooo? Why be extra nice when the deals half over already... well, kinda...?!?!?! Ugh this was all so stressful.
At 00:00 we arrived at "La Dolce Vita", a prominent, high class bar downtown. My pupils were red from some veins popping, I had dark rings under my eyes and my head kinda hurt- but still I was ought to get this nightmare over with. Okay, maybe a little dramatic but why be here with her when I could be there with him? Such a bloody waste of time. But for him, for us, I'd do anything. I'd even play pretend with a girl I had zero interest in. Am I a bad person for playing with her feelings?
She talked her ass off and I, to be honest didn't care a single bit about the shit she talked about. It was getting 1 a.m. and I was beginning to get fed up on a whole other level. Ughhhh, she's sooo damn annoying it's like she talks without any pause. What is Louis doing right now? Where is he? Probably in the hotel with the other 3. Probably also sleeping... Lucky him!
"So, what do you say we leave?", she interrupted my thoughts. She talked kinda weird. Was she drunk? From the 2 Martinis and one Sex on the Beach? Huh, that's kinda funny.
YES YES YES I WANT TO LEAVE. THANK FUCKING GOD.
"Sure, that's sounds good. I'm really tired! Shall we?"
"Wait. Hahahaha. What do you think I meant by us leaving? I mean us leaving to your place- or mine. I don't really care."
"Wait what? You want to come back to my place? It's like 1 am.", oh noooo. Dear God please no! Don't let this happen.
"Yeah, your hotel room?" she laughed. Okay, yeah she's defined wasted.
"No, I don't think that's a good idea. You're kinda drunk and no- I don't do... I'm not into.....- i don't do one night stands? ", I tried turning her down. She was relentless.
"Don't be absurd, Hazzzzzaaa-"
"Please don't call me that."
Then she comes closer. Woah what wait why???
"I want you to fuck me so bad, Harry. I want you to take me deep and make me cum a dozen of times. I want you to fuck me in the taxi, in the lobby restroom, on your bed, on the desk, against the wall. I wan't you to fuck the shit out of me. I wan't to be your slave. Do anything you want with me. Literally anything. Fuck the shit out of me and choke me till I can't breathe, please. Please dear god, Harry do dirty things with me. Pleaseeee. Fuck me so bad. Fuck my pussy and my ass till I can't walk for days. Spit on me and cum on me.", she whispered and then suddenly grabbed my dick.
I immediately pulled away, shoved her face from my ear and her hand from my abdomen. Now I got aggravated. Who the fuck does she think she is? For fucks sake! Damn, yes! The things she said were hot, but only if Louis would be saying these things to me. Not her!!!
"Get off me. I'm calling a cab. You're totally buzzed and this is totally not gonna happen Cheri."
I stood up, ran towards the mens restrooms and called a cab. As we sat in it approximately 15 minutes later, she passed out on the backseat as I was sitting next to the driver in the front, gazing at the night lights as I looked out the window, deep in my thoughts.
Well, maybe I don't need to feel that bad after all about using her, misleading her and playing with her feelings? Because maybe she didn't actually want anything emotional from me, just the physical aspect- just sex? I wish! Although it'd practically objectify me I'd feel relieved and wouldn't have a too bad of a conscience.
The taxi dropped us up at the hotel, I took her up to her floor and with the room card from her purse I opened the door to her room, let her fall on her huge bed gently and instantly left again. As I pressed the number of my floor on the elevator, I thought about going passed Lous room first but I decided against it- I was exhausted, fucked up, annoyed, tired.
The only positive aspect about the date with Cheri was that now it is more clear to me than ever that under no circumstance will I ever want to give up on Louis. Being with her, feeling nauseous and uncomfortable made me feel an immense amount of gratitude and joy, knowing that I have him by my side. I realized that I want to doing anything humanly possible, anything in my power to fight for us. I want to be able to call him mine always. The comfort of knowing he's my boy. That he's my person. My heart, my home.