Assassin's new normal life

By thedoctorgonepale

47.5K 2.1K 1.2K

One of the world's oldest jobs is hired killers, ninjas, or simply... assassins. Due to the need and demand f... More

Greatest no more
Killer day at the killer school
A cut of love
Shy shrine gal
Modern assassin
Drunken student
Mean team
Dragon quest
Lethal invasion: part 1
Lethal invasion: part 2
Where the spirits lay
Lost then found
Trial of the forest: part 1
Trial of the forest: part 2
Trial of the forest: part 3
Trial of the forest: part 4
Spiritual goodbye
Killer Date: part 1
Killer Date: part 2
Special mission-chan~
The copy problem
Broken memories
Corporate infultration
Corporate uncovered
Backstabbing the greatest threat
Chickens vs Roosters: part 1
Chickens vs Roosters: part 2
The last straw
Chickens vs Roosters: part 3
Chickens vs Roosters: part 4
Chickens vs Roosters: part 5
Killer arrangement
Lady troubles of the none killing kind
Never bring the past along
The price for fun: part 1
The price for fun: part 2
The price for fun: part 3
A dragon killing plan
Last Step towards the end: part 1
Last step towards the end: part 2
Last step towards the end: part 3
Past vs Present: Fight for the future

Spa day

806 41 23
By thedoctorgonepale

3rd person POV:

Happy as a newborn baby, Yn packed his things for the spa day he would spend on new Year's eve.

Yn: Hm-hm♪ Mmm hmmm♪

Kira:(reads newspaper)

Yn: Hey, aren't you going to pack?

Kira: It's only for the weekend, and I have nothing to pack.

Yn: Right, you only wear your ninja cosplay and my clothes...

Kira: Never refer to my uniform as "ninja cosplay" again.

Yn: Remind me to take you out to buy some clothes for you.

Kira: If it's such a problem, I can go by myself.

Yn: You could, but I feel like we've kinda been on rotten turms, so we should do some bonding.

Kira: Unnecessary.

Yn: Come on. You can consider it a self-learning journey.

Kira: Why would that make me wish to go?

Yn:(shrugs) I don't know.

Kira:(exasperated sigh)

Kira: I fear this weekend will be a long one...

Yn: I hope it never ends!

(Opening theme)


The Roosters and the Chickens arrive at a spa resort with an Asian-style hotel, all paid for in advance by Kira's funds.

Yn had yet to realize that the massive amount of money Kira spent was the money he had accumulated as the ultimate killer, making him the one paying for the spa day.

But he was too busy enjoying the fact that he was getting a "free" spa day to even begin to think about that.

In the spa provided by Kimodo's, the class was about to scatter and enjoy the weekend.

Yn: Bet a lot of you are feeling pretty stupid trying to kill me, eh?

Chan: Nah...

Haru: Not particularly.

Yang: I think I want to kill you more than before actually.

Yn:... Eh?

Paya: We appreciate it, Yn.

Yn: Thank you...

Everyone scatters to go enjoy their spa day.

Kira: I'll be around if you need me.

Yn: Oh no! You and I are going to have some bro time and fix our relationship!

Kira:(glare) I rather die.

Yn: It's this or therapy.

Kira:...

Kira: There's not a therapist in the world who can solve our problems.

Yn: I love a challenge.

Kira:...

Kira: Fine, might as well get what I paid for.

Yn: That's the spirit!

First up on the brotherly bonding session was massages.

Yn was on his stomach while Kira sat in a massage chair.

When the masseuse came, she got ready to work until she saw Yn's back.

Masseuse:!?

Yn:?

Kira: Is there something wrong?

Masseuse: A-ah n-nothing... It's just...there are so many scars...

Yn: There are!?

Kira: You didn't notice?

Yn: I can't see my back!

Kira: Ignore the scars, they're none of your business.

Masseuse: Yes. My apologies.

And so the massage began.

Yn: Ack!

Masseuse:!!

Masseuse:(mumbles) So...stiff... It's like massaging a steel wall...

Masseuse:(struggling to massage) It seems you're quite stressed.

Yn:(grunts)

Yn: N-no...well, yes...but I'm that kind of guy who doesn't get bothered by that kind of stuff.

(Crack)

Yn: AAGH!

(Crunch)

Yn:(grunts)

Masseuse: A-Am I hurting you? Do you want me to stop?

Yn: M-m-maybe be a bit more gental?

Kira:(stares)... Hold on.

Walking up to Yn, Kira feels his back.

Kira: Hmm... You've seen to have relocated a few bones that haven't properly healed...

Masseuse:!??

Kira: You might be onto something... I shall handle it from here.

Masseuse: O-okay...

She leaves Yn alone with Kira.

Yn: Uhh... I don't like where this is going...

Kira: Don't worry, you once pretended to be a masseuse to kill someone.

Yn: I think I rather have a professional than a pretender-

Kira: Hiya!

He elbow drops Yn's back.

(Pop)

Yn: GYAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!

Un-Enjoyable and completely painful, Yn actually felt better once the pain wore off. Whether it's because he had a new scale of pain or Kira actually fixed his back after all the injures he had gained through life, was unknown.

Next was a mud bath, along with face masks and cucumbers on the eyes.

Kira: What the hell are we doing? Why are there cucumbers on our eyes?

Yn: Not sure. It's supposed to be good for the skin.

Kira: If I wanted to bathe in mud, I would go to a forest.

Yn: You know this isn't the same kind of mud...

Kira: It's from Columbia...

Yn:... How do you know that?

Kira: I've...or, you've been there.

Kira: On one mission, we had to cover ourselves in mud to camouflage, making it easier to sneak up to our target.

Yn: We've been to Colombia?

Kira: We've been to almost everywhere.

Yn: Antarctica?

Kira: Yes.

Yn: Madagascar?

Kira: Yes.

Yn: Space?

Kira:...

Yn:(grins) No.... Space? Like space, space?

Kira:........... We were once hired to kill an astronaut.

Yn: OH.MY.GOOOOOOOOODNESSSS!

After cleaning themselves up, the two exited the mud bath. On their way out, Yn noticed Mai, Hana, and Kora about to take a mud bath.

When she noticed him, Yn smiled and waved as did Mai.

Kira and Yn then arrived at the hot springs.

It had a little waterfall which Yn sat under to help with the trama Kira put his back through.

Yn: Ah~

Kira:...

Kira: Yn, where is the Mao-Muhon?

Yn: Uh? Oh. I hid it where no man would dare to look or even consider.

Kira: Where?

Gesturing for Kira to get closer so he could whisper into his ear, Yn then told him.

Yn:(whispers) Ran's porn collection.

Kira:(deadpan look)

Yn: It's going to be tricky to get it out from there, but it should be safe.

Kira: The woman I've allowed you to train with, has a porn collection?

Yn: It's not that she's a pervert, I think she just gets lonely is all.

Kira: It matters not. I'm more concerned about the Mao-Muhon getting angry.

Yn: So the sword is living?

Kira: Yes.

Yn: What's the story of that?

Kira:(sigh)...

Kira: Long ago, a great demon walked the lands, challenging people to games for their souls.

Kira: The demon constantly won, until they challenged a blacksmith to see who could forge a greater weapon.

Kira: The blacksmith won, and the demon was forced to release the souls it took.

Kira: But the demon was not happy about this. So they tried again, only to fail again and again.

Kira: Constantly failing drove the demon mad, to the point it dedicated itself to making the ultimate weapon.

Kira: It hunted down another demon and melted it down to make a weapon, but only managed to forge a single shard.

Kira: The demon continued hunting down its kind to the point of extinction as they made more shards for their weapon.

Kira: Once the demon was able to make a full blade out of the shards, there was only one thing left to do...

Kira: Create the hilt...

Kira: Using their own body and soul as the material, the demon had the blacksmith that defeated them many times to forge her into the handle.

Kira: Following the demos instructions to the letter, the sword which history dubbed the Mao-Muhon was created...

Kira: Which the blacksmith admitted defeat to.

Yn: Holy crap...

Kira: The Mao-Muhon is the ultimate offensive weapon. Used correctly, it can slip past any defense to hit a target. Making it virtually unblockable.

Kira: But at a cost, it barely has any defensive capabilities... Unless you master it.

Yn:?

Kira: If you can control all one thousand shards individually, can find a loophole around the horrible defense.

Yn: Controlling a thousand shards seems hard. Two is all I can manage.

Kira: You did it once, you can do it again.

Yn: Well at least you believe in me...

Kira:...

Yn: Hey... Kira...

Kira: What is it?

Yn: Tell me... You want me to remember so badly, why?

Kira:... As a clone, I have a mission to follow.

Yn: Huh?

Kira: To make sure no shadow clones go rouge, you instilled yourself with the mindset that if you are a clone, you serve the original, unless they're compromised.

Yn:?

Kira: Me being a clone, my objective is to reawaken the Kira lost in your mind.

Kira: Once that's done... My existence will most likely end.

Yn: What? Why?

Kira: Because my existence is a mockery of everything I worked for.

Kira: The training I did...the horrors I had to endure and cause... The trials and tribulations and went through to become who I am...

Kira: All of it...worthless, if they can just be copied and mass-produced.

Yn: Is there an alternative to you dying?

Kira: Yes... If the original is beyond saving, then I'll consider this clone life as a second chance.

Kira: I'll end the original and carry out my plans.

Yn: Wow... I made such contingency plans in advance...must have been a paranoid guy...

Kira: That's what you took from all of that?

Yn: No, what I took from that is that there are several options you failed to consider.

Kira: Like...?

Yn: You and I both live, as who we are and live our lives happily.

Yn: No need to change anything.

Kira:...

Yn:(yawn)

Yn: You can think about that, I'm going to hang out with someone much more good-looking than you.

Yn: See ya tomorrow, clone bro.

Kira:...

Yn made his way to his hotel room, where he invited a guest over.

Miss Raoul.

Putting on a movie, the two sat close to each other, shyly and somewhat embarrassed.

Mai/Yn:(light blush)

Yn: So... How was your day?

Mai: It was pleasant. Yours?

Yn: Other than the attempted murder on my back, It was pretty nice. I and Kira bonded...I think...

Mai: That's nice...

Yn:(blushes)... So... I wanted to confirm... A-are we... A couple?

Mai:(blushes) I believe so...

Yn:... That means...you're okay if I did this?

He leans in close, and the two share another kiss.

Mai:(smiles) Yes... I'm fine with it.

Yn: So what finally made you give in to my amazing charms?

Mai:... Let's just say... I knew you would make me lose focus. So when I had nothing no focus on anymore...

Mai:(smiles) I couldn't help but given o your charms.

Yn:(blushes) Oh you~

Leaning in for another kiss, Kira opens the door and entered the room.

Mai/Yn:!?

Kira:?

Yn: Heh...hey there, bro... Can I help you?

Kira:... Apologies... I just came to return this.

He tosses Yn's hairband.

Yn: Thanks... See you later?

Kira:...

Leaving, he locks the door, giving the newly formed couple privacy.

Kira:...(sigh)

(Ending theme)

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