Dirty Little Secret

Walking and Secrets

Nicolas' POV

After we all pair up, our teacher leads us outside with the guide, and me and Nathan start walking together. I try and look around for Jason, but I don't see him or Luis anywhere around.

'I don't like this.' Benny says softly, but it's not as mean as the first time when Nathan and I decided to hang out.

As we walk through the forest and I halfway listen to Nathan beside me, I bite my lip as I start to think, kicking tiny pebbles out of the way as I shiver slightly in my jacket.

At first, when we first learned of this trip, I didn't think I would be happy with having to hide with Jason. And hes my brother. Something about Nathan's easy smile and charms made me think that maybe he would be the better option, even if he is human. But as I steal shy glances form the corner of my eye, I begin to feel something.

Everything that I like about Nathan, is Jason. The dark hair, the cocky smiles, the way they both treat me like I'm just an average wolf.

The only difference is, Jason is my brother, and being with Nathan would be nothing to hide.

I whimper slightly in my throat, trying to keep quiet, but on the inside, I'm slowly freaking out. Because what if I take too long to chose? What if someone gets hurt? Just as I start to spiral, I feel Nathan's hands on me, my shoulders feeling warm as I go to look up and find him standing in front of me.

"Hey. You okay Nick? You started to freak out a little bit. Do we need to take a break from walking?" He asks me, his face full of worry.

I go to answer him, but looking over his shoulder, I see Jace and Luis standing by a tree, looking back at me. Luis' face is blank as he leans against the wood. Jace's face is smooth, but his eyes, possessive and worried roam my body as if being able to sense what's wrong just by looking at me. When his eyes reach my eyes, his head lowers as he smiles a little bit, having gotten caught staring. When he looks back up at me through his lashes, he gives me a little shrug and a nod before he turns around, him and Luis continuing on.

And for some reason, I find myself breathless.

'Mate. That's our Mate.' Benny says, his voice soft and sweet as we both take in the choice, that never really a discussion.

As much as I adore Nathan and his easy charm, I want Jason. I want to be with him even if it can't be in public. There's no use in getting the easy way out, when Jason is the best person in the world to me, regardless of what anyone thinks.

I feel my ears burn as I try to keep my lips from twitching.

"I'm okay. Just wasn't focusing." I tell Nathan who is still fussing over me worriedly.

"Good. I don't think I would know what to do if you had a panic attack. I'm not good with that type of stuff." He tells me with a crooked grin, and I realize that it doesn't make my cheeks light up or cause me to look away anymore.

We walk side by side again and make our way along the trail with everyone else, the two of us talking, and I feel a sense of calm as we do, as if that one decision was dragging me down more than I knew. 'Jason is my Mate.' I say softly to myself, the softness of his name on my lips making me want to stop and do my happy dance in the snow.

"I haven't seen that much of you since we got here." Nathan says and I think about it, and realize rhat the only time we've seen each other is when we're eating.

"Sorry, I didn't notice." I tell him, looking away and he steps towards me to bump his shoulder with mine.

"It's okay. But maybe we could.." Before he can finish his thought, I interrupt him so I won't have to reject him with the road that we're going down.

"I have to tell you a secret." I tell him, stopping him for a second, keeping my voice low as I make sure that no one is listening.

"What kind?" He asks and I feel myself smile a little.

"I found my Mate!" I tell him and he just pauses to look at me for a few seconds before a half shocked grin comes across his face.

"Oh. That's great Nick." He says though I think we both know that he only half meant it. "Do I know him?" He asks and I think about how much I should tell him before I decide to at least keep one thing a secret before he tries to tell everyone.

"Maybe. But we're keeping it quiet since it's new." I tell him, and the blush along my cheeks is real.

"That makes sense." He says absently and I sigh in relief, knowing that I can focus on Jace and us being happy with each other. "Can we still be friends? If that's okay?" Nathan asks me and I smile and tug on my sleeve as I turn for us to keep walking.

"Of course. You're my best friend." I tell him, and while he flinched a little, he smiles at me, getting the look in return.

Maybe things can fall together earlier than planned.

~~~~~~~~~~
How are you guys doing today? I didn't do a lot of work, but I'm glad with what I did do. It will be a little cliffhanger at the end though guys sorry, but i'll fix it in the morning.

Thoughts?

Comments?

QOTD: Have you watched the polar express?