Bliss

fourteen

Paula has a big mouth. The biggest. For how else can you explain Mum's concerned gaze or Dad's disappointed grimace. You can't, that's how. She swears she didn't tell them about Spencer, but I'm not an idiot. Henry never would. It may come as a surprise, but we respect one another's privacy. Keep each other's secrets. But when it comes to Paula, she's a hand grenade, pulsing until she explodes and sends shrapnel flying everywhere. My life, my business, is that shrapnel, and although I insist that I'm fine and that I don't need to talk about it, Mum and Dad whisk me away anyway.

It's the most awkward journey of my life. More awkward than the airport car park and the drive to the club combined. I'm half tempted to fling myself out of the car, but I don't quite fancy spending the rest of the trip in a hospital bed. That and I know Mum will think I've finally snapped. She's been waiting for it through A-Level madness and Spencer's foray into Penelope, but I'm fine.

At least I think I am.

What am I saying?

Of course I am.

And what does it matter anyway?

Who's a hundred per cent fine a hundred per cent of the time?

No one. I can tell you that for free. And if they say they are, they're lying.

Eventually, Dad parks. I slip out of the car, glancing up at the cliffs, and stifle a groan. As beautiful as the houses are, even they're getting old.

"I hope you're not taking me on another boat," I say. The view was amazing, I'll admit, and sometimes I felt like Rose before the Titanic sank, but I didn't appreciate being trapped with everyone's opinions. I could've done with it.

"I thought you enjoyed it," Mum says, frown lines marring her smooth skin.

"I did," I say, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. "I just think I've had my fill of the marina."

"Well too bad," Dad says, powering ahead. He falters as he nears the restaurants and spins to face us. "What will it be?" he asks, glancing from left to right. "Fancy or filling?"

"Filling," I grin. "Definitely filling."

I missed breakfast. Not on purpose, but then I heard Isaac's laugh, and I turned on my heel and barricaded myself in my room. It seemed like a smart thing at the time, the right thing, but now my stomach is staging a coup.

"You read my mind." Dad all but runs to the café, leaving Mum and me to dawdle behind.

She laughs as he eagerly takes a seat. "Your father's crazy," she says, stroking my hand. "Absolutely nuts."

"I guess I get it from him."

"Oh no." Her grasp tightens. "You're your own person. Always have been, always will be."

"I'm not sure if that's a compliment," I laugh, leaning against her shoulder. "But I'll take it."

"We love you," she says, suddenly very earnest. The frown lines are back and everything.

"I love you guys too," I say.

"But Spencer—"

"—Is that why you bought me here?" I ask.

I knew this was coming, but knowing something and actually experiencing it are two very different things.

"I just don't understand," Mum says, slowing our crawl to an absolute stop.

"Did Paula put you up to this?" She seemed so supportive of my decision yesterday, but then if Paula is good at anything, it's the comforting part. She leaves the hard truths to others. Usually, I'm that vessel, the bad cop to her good one, or Dad. But today, it's Mum, with her furrowed brows and stroking hand.