Off the Grid

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Three new holes in my bedroom wall. Four in total.

For the past four hours I had been sitting down, pacing, and jamming my fist into the paint. I was in a state of fury that overcame my senses and dominated half my brain. As hard as I tried to focus on the mission, which was in mere minutes, I couldn't do anything to distract me from the looming tragedy that had occurred.

It was him. The boy that I had spent the last couple months developing a relationship with. The boy I had kissed. The boy I had broken things off with to protect.

I scoffed at the concept now. Because now he was the boy I despised. The boy that had lied. The boy that needed to mean nothing to me.

I had been throwing my knives at my wall over and over when I noticed the clock. 7:50. Go time.

I stood up, putting on a stoic expression and heading for my door. I extended my fingers towards the handle before stopping. My eyes had caught my dresser, and I stepped away from my door before hesitantly opening my sock drawer and digging around until my hand closed around cold steel. The pistol I had used at Joey's. I could still picture Sandy's face when she saw it; terrified, staring at me as if she no longer knew who I was.

I had a feeling about today.

And so I added the gun to my belt.

I made my way to the training room, where everyone was grabbing extra gear to bring. They all looked in business mode, hiding their fear as I was hiding my anger. I felt Robin's—or Dick's— eyes on me, but I didn't even glance his way.

No one spoke as we made our way to the Bioship, and the tension layered itself like falling snow as we flew across Gotham to the abandoned warehouse we knew was littered with Bots. The silence stretched on like an overused elastic band, and it was only when we left the ship, having landed a little ways away from the building, that Robin spoke to me.

"Do you know what time it is?" He asked casually as we walked out of the ship. I didn't look his way.

"Yes."

I caught up with Aqualad as Robin — no, Dick, I reminded myself — sighed behind me, exasperated with my lack of cooperation but undoubtedly knowing why he deserved it.

"Okay," Aqualad said as we all circled around him, "you know the plan, team. Be safe, be smart, head out."

"Good luck, guys," reassured M'gann, heading into the skies as Connor vaulted onto the roof.

"If I die, donate all of my organs," I ordered, walking away from the group and to the front doors, "except for my middle finger, you can give that to Robin."

No one other than Dick knew why I was angry, but I didn't care. My fury was palpable, forming a thick, lard like layer around every other emotion inside of me.

I made it to the doors, and Robin came up beside me, about to open them when I grabbed his arm and pulled him back.

"Trip wire," I mumbled, nodding at the threshold before hopping over the thin string and entering the building.

Rule #8 of Being a Criminal: always look for booby traps.

"Thanks," he muttered back, but I didn't acknowledge it, just examining the interior hallways that we had arrived in. I grabbed a flashlight from my belt and turned it on the lowest setting, carefully examining the floors and walls in the dim lighting. I could hear distant noises deep inside, and I suddenly felt a jolt of what could only be anxiety as the anticipation of what was to come really weighed down on me.

I took the lead, and we wove around two empty hallways before coming across a rickety staircase. My light flickered and then shut off, and I swore under my breath.

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