Deserve [H.S.]

Chapter 33

GONE

Life wasn't always fair.

How could life be fair when bad things happened to good people?

Noah's brain was blank after Harry left. She couldn't tell exactly how long she had been crying, but she knew a decent amount of time had passed as she was crumpled on the floor against the front door, with her legs hugged to her chest and her face buried into her bent knees. Her body felt physically exhausted and her mind felt mentally exhausted. Her eyes were stinging, her throat felt sore beyond belief, and her shoulders were tight from the way that they were tensed with each sob.

How was this fair?

When Noah finally felt her tears run dry, she slowly brought her head up and stared at the ground in front of her aimlessly. She wasn't really looking at anything in particular, her eyes were just unfocused on the space in front of her. There were too many thoughts going through her head that she couldn't even find a single one to focus on, so her mind felt like an overwhelmed factory with dozens of gears turning at different speeds and directions, with none of them aligning properly to create any sense of stability or smoothness.

Despite the disturbed state her brain was in, Noah was still cognizant enough to make the decision that she had to bring herself to bed. She managed to pull herself up from the floor, using the wall for help as she slowly stood up. Her brain was pretty much blank as she took heavy and staggered steps towards her room.

Finally reaching her bed and immediately climbing inside, Noah didn't even feel like she was in control of her movements. It felt like something else was controlling her body while her brain was just going through the motions.

As she pulled her sheets up to her chin, simply staring at the wall in front of her while lying on her side, Noah had no idea what to think. She didn't even know where to start with her thoughts.

Harry was gone. He was in danger. Anthony was going to go after him. She had to stay away from anything to do with Harry. Harry was gone. She potentially didn't have a boyfriend anymore. Were they technically broken up now? She couldn't talk to Harry. She couldn't see Harry. Harry was gone.

Noah's handsome, sweet, loving dreamboat was gone.

A single tear streaked down Noah's cheek, sliding at an awkward angle before it made contact with the pillow beneath her. She didn't even notice that she had started crying again.

Once again, she wasn't sure how much time had passed as she lied in her bed with a fried brain. She heard the sound of the front door opening, followed by the sounds of Colette returning home from her date and getting herself ready for bed.

Noah stayed awake and heard Colette go into her room for the night. Then, the sound of Colette's phone ringing cut through the otherwise silent apartment.

"Hi, I just got home. All safe and sound," Colette quietly said, clearly having answered the call. After a pause, presumably due to the person on the phone speaking, Colette replied with, "thank you again for tonight. I had an amazing time with you. I'd really love to see you again soon."

The smile and pure happiness was obvious in Colette's tone and on any other day, Noah would have been so happy for her friend. In that moment, though, that conversation could not have come at a worse time.

Harry was gone.

Despite her attempts to fight it, Noah's tears started up again. She kept them as quiet as she could, hoping that Colette wouldn't hear her. She didn't want to ruin Colette's good night by dumping her issues onto her.

As Noah's cheeks became more and more soaked with her tears, she somehow drifted off to sleep. She didn't even realize that she was tired enough to sleep, but her body was so exhausted that it took mercy on her and allowed her a momentary escape from her suddenly horrible reality.