IT WAS VERY, VERY CLEAR TO [M/N] HIMSELF THAT HE WAS NOT THE MAIN CHARACTER. he was just an extra, destined to live a normal, quiet life; to be a supporting role to those who were 'protagonists'.
just the quiet kid in the corner, keeping to himself, his mind lost in his own la la land.
he never saw himself as 'special'. special people, in his eyes, were those who had talent- those who were gifted, or even if they were not, somehow they'd still shine brightly; standing out like a peacock in a flock of crows.
and he.. he was just there. another one of those 'crows', hiding in the shadows; watching in envy as the 'peacock' passes him, shying away if he was even spared a glance.
[m/n] used to believe he was the main character- he was athletic, and he had a nice face- he was pretty popular too, nice grades, a creative mind- though, that was until he got into junior high.
volleyball was once his passion. he was ecstatic when he found that he had gotten into the powerhouse school, kitagawa daiichi- and of course, his first instinct was to get into the boys' volleyball team.
albeit the fact that he had fast reflexes, and that he could run really fast; the coach was hesitant on sending him out to play in games. he was the resident bench warmer; always sitting on the side, watching as his teammates shone, as they won prize after prize. without him.
he begged the coach to let him play- even if it was just for one time. reluctantly the coach agreed, and he was sent out. as the libero, what he would usually train as.
..in the end, they lost. all because [m/n] was too excited to concentrate. he could still remember the dirty looks he received, the harsh scolding he got from his coach.
he'd been a bench warmer at games ever since.
[m/n] would watch as the other members bonded, as they went out to celebrate; and he, he was never invited. it hurt, it really did.
he lost his fire, yet he couldn't leave. it was as if there was a chain binding him to his once favourite sport- he always turn around, run back to the court that he never belonged in.
so he began to daydream. creating a world where he was loved, where he was needed, where he was actually, for once, the main character; indulging himself in the imagined attention that he received from his 'friends', his outer shell living his life as the normal extra, sitting in the back of the class, as the loner who never spoke.
he was on the sidelines, watching; watching as oikawa and iwazumi played their last game in junior high with the rest of the team, watching as the rest of the team abandoned kageyama, blank eyes staring forwards, unmoving as he felt kageyama glance at him once in a while, with them both being benched.
fuck oikawa. fuck iwazumi. fuck the coach.
fuck kageyama, and mostly, fuck everyone in kitagawa daiichi.
❝..𝐈 𝐃𝐎𝐍'𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐀 𝐁𝐄 𝐀𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐄❞
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word count: 591
pages: 1.8
recently discovered haikyuu, decided to start watching that anime. seriously, best decision of my life. this is a venting book. god, i need to stop making books and focus on my main-
