World's apart (Thorin Oakenshield fanfic)

Chapter 23. Returning to you

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And that happened sooner then you thought it would. You couldn't sit down and wait as Marriet suggested you should do. Your One and your friends were in that mountain. Risking their lives for a lost home. Little did they know they would have to risk their lives again a few days later. You had already sent a raven to Thorin's cousin, Dain. He had to be here on time to help prevent Thorin from getting killed. You weren't sure if he would come since you had sent him the letter, but it was worth a try. He would arrive here sooner and the plot would be changing, but right now you didn't care. You didn't want to stick to Gandalf's plan anymore. Your heart told you Thorin would still die if you did listen to the wizard.

You couldn't help but pace around as you waited for the dragon to fly towards Lake Town. Gandalf convinced you that you could do nothing to protect the villagers. Bard and the other's had to be there to slay the dragon, or he would still survive. You had never felt so guilty in your life. You knew a lot of people would die in the dragon fire and there was nothing you could do against it. A loud noise from the mountain captured your attention and your heart started racing. You were breathing rapidly and you found hard to control it. What was happening to your body? Gandalf looked at you from the place he sat. He had noticed the changed but refuges to find out if he was correct.

And there was stil the dragon sickness... You had to go back because Thorin had asked you to, but you didn't know how he would act. You didn't want to see him go through that, you just couldn't do that. 

The elven King had already warned him about the possibility, but he still didn't want to find out. He needed you to save the rightful King under the Mountain. Thorin belonged on the throne of Erebor. Sauron had to be stopped in this early fight. Another noise erupted from the mountain and this time Smaug came flying out of Erebor. The gold fell off his skin without any hesitation and he flew towards Lake Town.

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The dragon had been driven away. They all watched the desolation of Lake Town. They all saw how Smaug fell into the lake. But no one cheered. Everyone knew a lot of lives were lost tonight. There was no reason to celebrate. Thorin watched as the flames climbed high into the night. The night was filled with fire and smoke, something he remembered from all those years ago. The same scene played in front of him, just with other people. Dwalin and Balin stood beside him, both silent as they too remembered this image from their past. 'Gloin, Bofur' Thorin said softly. 'Aye' the said in unison, mesmerized by the fire. 'Go back and look for survivors. Tell them to come here for shelter and food.' 

For a moment they just stood there, watching the flames burning against the dark background. They left silently. 'Can't we do anything else uncle?' Kili asked. Thorin turned around and looked at his nephews. They had never seen this before. He could see the shock and anger on their faces. Did he look like this when he was younger? 'We can make the beds ready, if they are still here.' The Company nodded and went back inside. They all turned their back on the fire, trying desperately not to think about all the lost souls. Balin lead the younger dwarves towards the chambers, showing them around in their new home. Thorin forgot they had never been here and wouldn't know where the chambers were.

Thorin sat down on his throne, looking at nothing in particular. If he would have been alone he would have allowed himself to cry. Here, where his Company could hear him, he couldn't show his sadness. He felt awful for sending that serpent to Lake Town, even though it wasn't his fault. Thorin was sure you would have tried to talk him out if this thought if you would have been here... He could only hope the wizard hadn't brought you to Lake Town. The chances of you surviving would be slim, he knew that. Balin knew what plagued his mind, that's why he had made it his job to show the lads around. He couldn't do it right now. 'She wasn't there.' Thorin looked up. Dwalin stood in front of him, his eyes showing him he understood how he felt.

'It was a part of the wizard's plan that Kim and I stayed at Lake Town. I have not seen (Y/N) there' Dwalin said. Thorin closed his eyes. He had lost so much during his long life. First he had lost his home, his grandfather, his father and his brother. Then they had lost Dis's husband and now he may have lost you. What had he done to Mahal to deserve this? 'THORIN!' Bilbo yelled from the entrance of the mountain. Thorin's eyes shot open and he and Dwalin grabbed their swords. They rushed towards the halfling, thinking they were being attacked by orc's. The hobbit saw them running and noticed the mistake he had made. 'There's nothing wrong! They are here!' he yelled excitedly. Thorin slowed down and put his sword away.

Why couldn't the halfling have said that in the first place? 'Sometimes I think he does this on purpose' Dwalin muttered. Thorin smiled. 'I don't think you would be wrong.' As they came closer Thorin frowned his eyebrows. Bofur and Gloin were quick. Maybe too quick. Had something happened? Thorin quickened his pace. On the other hand, Bilbo seemed very excited. Maybe a little too excited. Behind the loose stones appeared Gandalf with his wand in his hand. He smiled at the dwarf and bowed his head. Thorin stopped dead in his tracks. If the wizard was here that must mean... 

And there you were. Thorin couldn't believe his eyes. You were truly there. He hadn't imagined the pain in his chest nor had he imagined seeing you on the back of that eagle. You had been there all along. You came running towards him, throwing yourself in his arms. Thorin wrapped his arms around you, swirling you around. He was laughing and somewhere in the back of his mind he could hear more excited voices. It felt so natural to hold you in his arms, like you belonged there. Your skin was so soft. He buried his nose in your air and inhaled deeply. You still smelled like you. Hesitantly you pulled back to look at him. Tears were welling up in his eyes and a bright smile covered his face. He cupped your face with his large hand.

'You have returned to me' he said softly. A small laugh escaped your lips. 'I promised you I would.' You leaned forwards to rest your forehead against his, your eyes were searching for something in his. Softly he pecked your lips before fully kissing you, not caring who was watching you. He pulled back to look in your eyes, and found hesitation in your eyes. 'What's wrong âzyungâl?' he whispered, hoping the wizard wouldn't hear him. 'Are you... How are you?' you asked. Thorin wasn't sure why you asked that but figured you hadn't seen each other for a few weeks. 'I'm doing great now that you are back in my arms' he said, and your eyes softened.

Whatever you had been aiming at, he had been able to take it away, for now. Thorin took a step back to fully see your body, looking for anything that might indicate harm. 'Did you get hurt?' he asked suspiciously when he couldn't see anything. You shook your head. 'I didn't, I'm doing great' you lied. Of course no real harm had come upon you but you didn't feel well at all. Marriet cleared her throat. 'She has been feeling ill for the last few weeks.' Mentally you wanted to slap her but you couldn't do that now, not with Thorin staring at you like you were a wounded deer. 'Bombur! Make a bed ready for her immediately!' he ordered and quickly picked you up in his arms. 

'You have to rest my love' he stated and carried you towards the chambers. The dwarves around you looked worried as well. At first they had been excited to see their lass returned to them, but now there was worry. Kim ran after you, trying to keep up with Thorin as he rushed down the halls. 'Really, this isn't necessary' you tried but you could already read Thorin's answer in his eyes. 'If Marriet says you are not feeling well, then that means you are not feeling well (y/n)' Kim pointed out. You let your head hang back on Thorin's arm and noticed your friend walking closely behind him. 'Kim!' you shouted excitedly. She smiled at you but there was also worry in her eyes. Why did everyone think you were going to die when there was nothing wrong with you?

You reached the chambers and Thorin laid you down on a soft bed. The room was clouded with dust but it looked like a luxurious room. Thorin was very careful with you as he laid you down beneath the covers. He stroked some hair from your face and planted a soft kiss on your cheek. 'What is wrong?' he asked. His voice was slightly shaking. The last time you had been away from each other, he had almost lost you. He remembered it all too well. Carefully, Kim sat down on the bed next to you, looking strangely at you. 'There is nothing wrong. I just felt sick a few weeks ago, and now my back is aching. Nothing to worry about.' But Thorin didn't look convinced. 'Did you eat enough?' 'Aye.' 'Did you have enough sleep?' 'Aye' you said and tried not to roll your eyes.

You knew he was only worried about your well being but there was nothing wrong with you! He let one hand rest on your belly as he caressed your cheek with the other. That's when you felt the strange feeling again. Thorin frowned and looked down at his hand.