Is This Happiness

55

Do it again. Reading my thoughts, he kisses my nose. Unable to lose skin to skin contact. I wrap my arms around his neck. Feeling his hands drop from my face to wrap around my waist. Lifting me with a hand under my ass, he squeezed tightly.

I never want to let go. Pushing myself close as I could with the help of his crushing hold. I sigh deeply into his neck feeling his breath tremble out.

So I really do have an affect on him.

The tip of my tongue draws out, slowly licking up the side of his neck. "Fuck don't do that." I ignore his hardened tone, instead listening to the hand now smothered in my hair.

"Why not?" I whisper lowly reaching his ear, biting softly. "You're killing me slowly." I laugh at his choice of words.

"You think that's funny?" I lean up to see his eyes the darkened color I expected to see.

I nod with a closed lip smile. A marker is shoved up my ass when he slams me down onto the table. "Oh my god, Stefano!"

Reaching over my body to grab something. A shocked voice reached my ears.

"Carmen sweetheart?" I jump out of my skin turning to see my mother standing by the door. With knowing eyes, the same eyes i'd see after trying to hide a bad report card from her.

I looking back to see Stefano now standing within a distance from me.

"Yes?" I ask, as if nothing had happened before. Swallowing back the lump in my throat.

"Let's go for a walk." She calls out to me. How much did she see? "It's cold." I whine, trying to find any excuse to not go through her interrogation.

"I'll be waiting in the garden." She gives me a pointed look, terrifying me quite literally.

Sitting quietly, I stand up to only be pushed back down. Moving my hair over my shoulder. I smack him on the chest. It didn't go as planned, i'm pulled into him again.

"Stefano." Warning him with my tone. A kiss is placed to my neck. Sending shivers down my spine. I cant help but let my hand travel up to his hair. Loving the feeling of his throaty groan vibrating my neck.

"Don't you have somewhere to be?" His accent speaking into my ear. His joking gives me a type of comfort I couldn't explain. Soft lips not letting go. I play with his hair. "I do."

"I'll see you tonight." His words were almost like a threat. A threat to my heart and the unknown meaning of his words. "Tonight?"

"In my room." Cupping the side of my face with one of his palms. Excitement fills my body.

"I'll be there." I wink, sliding off of the table. Taking his hand from my face, I kiss it. Enjoying the look of one thousand emotions flash in his eyes. Like an open book, I couldn't understand his scary persona.

He was my big bear.

"I'll be waiting." As you should.

...

"How is Stefano?" My mom pipes, sticking her hands inside of her sweaters big pockets. The freezing wind blew my hair into my face. Getting into my mouth and strangling me.

"How would I know?" I ask her too defensively for my own good. Having enough of the wind and tying the hair back with a band.

"You seem to be good friends." She teases, wanting a reaction. Little did she know she wouldn't get one, especially not from me.

I gulp thinking of a good lie.

"I wouldn't say best friends." Rolling her eyes, she takes a good look at me. "I'm not blind."

"I didn't say that you were." I add, raising my brows. "I know more than you think, Carmen."

What was that supposed to mean?

"I'm sure you do." Nodding to herself.

"Are you being a smart ass?" She stops in her step. "I just don't know what you mean." I confirm my words, more gently.

"Unlike everyone here, I have questioned where that wife of his is. No one questions his motives or doings Carmen and here you are buddies with him." She's right, i'm sure they have but they would never to his face.

"What do you expect me to tell you?" I ask her feeling the guilt eat me alive.

"I just want what's best for you. That you wouldn't.."

"Wouldn't what?" Staring at me for a good minute I knew she didn't know how to spill to me what she meant. Maybe afraid of the reaction she didn't want.

"Be with a married man." I soak in her words.

"I know it's wrong, that's why i'm not. And I promise you that i'm not. Can you believe me? Can you take my word for it, and trust your daughter. Know that i'm not." I grab both sides of her arms stilling her, begging her. I wasn't lying at all. It was true what she said, but he was my husband.

Not believing him and confronting, Stefano. He finally showed me the actual documents. It was a replica of the lines I signed the night I did, nothing had changed.

I was the wife of Stefano Genovese. I was like the queen of the mafia world. The world that I walked into myself.

Watching me with a look in her eyes, I wanted to confess everything. "I knew I raised you right." She jokes lightheartedly. Sending all of my anxiety away like a wave in the ocean.

Wrapping an arm around my shoulder. We walk the garden catching up with each other.

...

hi