Always Besides You.... (Editing)

32. COLLOQUY

She smiled a little and gave a nod.

"I want to hear, please." Sanskar pleaded.

"I do, Sanskar. I trust you...the most in my life now." She said honestly.

He relaxed evidently as the words sunk in and he tightened his hold on her palms.

"Ragz, do you remember the night before our marriage? I called you for the party but you were scared of me backing out from the marriage." He said softly as Ragini nodded her head in response. "Do you remember what I told that day?" He asked bringing a smile on her face at the memories.

"Ragz, I can't say that our life would be perfect. It will have highs and lows. The thing is, we will be together. Whatever happens, we can handle it together. I'll be there for you and I won't disappoint you."

"Ragz.." He made sure of his hold repeately. "I---" he trailed off.

"Sanskar, it's okay. You can talk to me whenever you want. Give yourself sometime to get a grip over things. I'm here only. I know you're extremely affected by Kavitha's return." Ragini tried to comfort Sanskar with her words.

"So are you!" Sanskar was quick in his reply. "Ragz, YOU'RE MY WIFE. And I can't even imagine what a wife would feel in a situation like this. I'm sorry. I was so emotional yesterday that I ended up like that. I didn't want to but--"

"Sanskar, why are you being sorry for that? I'm your wife with whom you can share anything."

"Ragz, before stepping ahead, we need to be clear about us. We can't just jeopardize our relation with some silly games or misunderstandings." Sanskar said in a tone of finality.

"You do love her Sanskar, don't you?" Fresh tears rolled down her cheeks even without her knowing.

"Ragz, Kavitha was my everything once upon a time. And when I lost her, I felt failed as a lover and friend as I couldn't protect her. And the misconception that my failure was because of my family made me go mad.

Later, when talks of marriage came up, I was afraid; afraid to take responsibility of another person. I didn't want to marry, that is fact, but I knew I had to consider it at some point of my life for family. And you came as my friend, my Wife.

All of a sudden, when I was verge of losing you, the fear I had kept aside engulfed me again, Ragz. I was struck at the moment I saw you lying in a pool of blood. Unknowingly, I again failed to protect! But you were strong to return back to me.

And now, Kavitha, whom I had my world around her, comes back and accuses me of being her assassin. Yesterday, at that moment, I felt I failed as a human." Sanskar heaved a sigh. His life is anything but simple.

"And on what you asked, I love Kavitha. She had been my friend since I was 16. Later, even after we developed feelings for eachother, our love for eachother as friends was and is more deeper than as lovers. And that love remains even now. She has a permanent place in my heart, Ragz."

They both stared each other as Ragini tried to force a smile on her face.

"So you do, Ragz! You never need to replace her because you own another part of my heart. The most important place, bigger than her now, my Wife! Ragz, did I ever run away from acknowledging you as my wife?" Sanskar's voice was soft.

Ragini nodded in denial with her watery eyes; tears of relief.

"Ragz, Kavitha is my past. I don't know how to describe my relation with her. She's more to a friend but not more important than you. I---"

"I understood." Ragini said with a smile.

"We knew eachother's past and had accepted it. Maybe that's why I had blabbered so many things yesterday. I consider you as a part of my life, Ragz. That's why unconsciously I said 'my Kavitha', 'our Kavitha' and all to you.. Sorry if you--"