↳ 𝖎𝖒𝖕𝖊𝖈𝖚𝖓𝖎𝖔𝖚𝖘║ (ᵀᴼᴰᴼᴿᴼᴷᴵ ˣ ᴿᴱᴬᴰᴱᴿ)

𝖙𝖍𝖎𝖗𝖙𝖊𝖊𝖓

"you're here early." you commented while sitting down opposite todoroki.

you were back at the noodle bar, since he had developed quite the liking for soba.

"oh, hello l/n." he greeted. "i ordered early so the soba would be cold by the time you got here."

you chuckled. "that's sort of cute."

"hm?"

"oh, nothing. eat up, i'll just go order something."

todoroki stood up. "no it's okay, just tell me what you want and i'll order." he offered, fishing out his wallet.

"but i can p—"

"i'll pay, its okay." he insisted.

you didn't argue further. although you felt guilty for letting him buy you free food, it wasn't like you were swimming in money anyway. you just made a mental note to yourself to avoid eating out for a while so you could spend some money when you were with todoroki.

while todoroki was eating and trash talking his father, your thoughts were spiralling out of control.

you weren't sure if you like liked him. maybe it's because you'd never considered you'd even have a change with someone so out of your league, but in your opinion, bakugou was also out of your league. that never stopped your feelings for him.

wait, bakugou.

you realised you hadn't been thinking about him as often, or even talking about him to mina like you usually did. heck, it had only been a day but that kiss with todoroki took up your very limited brain space, and you didn't have time to think about bakugou. but now that you did, you felt a smile tug at the corners of your lips. and then a frown.

why am i fawning over someone who'll never see me that way, when i have a guy who cares for me already?

you stopped yourself from continuing your daydream and looked back up at todoroki, who now looked worried. "are you okay?"

and somehow, those words made you start crying, which only confused the poor boy in front of you even more. the guilt was overwhelming. here you were, sitting in front of someone who had just confessed their feelings for you, eating with him, laughing with him, and joking around, all the while daydreaming about the person you had a one sided crush on for god knows how long.

is this considered leading someone on? fuck i think i messed up.

you hadn't cried in a long time, so it felt good to let it out for a change.
your head was crowded with thoughts like, 'what if i choose todoroki? i'd be called a gold digger and nothing else' and 'why are you such a dramatic bitch, stop crying you stupid head' all at once.

"can i rant to you, todoroki?" you asked with a shaky voice.

"of course." he responded immediately. he left a generous tip on the table before grabbing his coat from his chair. "would you like to be somewhere quieter?"

you only nodded, wiping the tears from your face and keeping your head down. you stood up quietly, and todoroki wrapped an arm around your shoulder and guided you out the door.

and that's when you knew, you didn't deserve him one bit.

~•~

"what's wrong?" he asked when he took you to much farther away from campus than you'd ever been on your own.

"what is this place?"

"it's just a nice place to walk, there's a lot of trees and not many people." he told you and you smiled softly.

"that's thoughtful of you." you said quietly.

the two of you walked side by side in silence, neither or you sure of how to approach the situation. "do you want to talk about it?" he asked after a while.

"i- uh, yes. i do. i just, don't know where to start." you rambled. "i just? i should have told you before, but i have feelings for someone else. but he doesn't feel the same. and i'm not expecting anything to come out of it either, i know nothing will happen. but god, i still like him. whenever i'm with you, i feel like i'm being disloyal to my feelings even though i don't owe him shit. and i feel like, by not saying any of this earlier that i was leading you on. and i hate it, todoroki. because you're too good for yet and yet you're out here wasting your time when you could be with someone e—"

your monologue was cut short when todoroki pulled you into a tight hug. "i'm sorry."

"what? why are you sorry? i'm the one who-"

"i'm the one making you feel like this, right?" he interrupted. "i'm sorry. i shouldn't have been so pushy."

"todoroki, please. you're the last person who should apologise. i'm so very sorry for not being able to control my feelings for him, for not being able to choose you when you're giving me every reason to, and heck? even for talking to you about the guy i like when i know full well you just confessed your feelings to me. i really am a train wreck huh?"

he cracked a small smile at that. "that's what i like about you." you cocked an eyebrow at him.

"what?"

"the train wreck part. it's refreshing. the fact that you're not perfect makes me feel like i don't have to be so perfect all the time either."

"...thanks todoroki."

"for?"

"reminding me that it's okay to be a train wreck sometimes."

he finally released you from his embrace and nodded. "glad i could help."

you put some space between the two of you, and resumed your walk. "so, bakugou huh?"

your head snapped in todoroki's direction. "how did you know?"

"it was either you liked him or he was your long lost brother from another mother."

"and why was 'long lost brother from another mother' even an option?" 

"it seemed likely at the time." todoroki shrugged.

he managed to make you laugh a few more times after this, and you finally felt yourself relax again.

"you're not mad that i like him then?"

"why would i be? i might be a little concerned about your taste in men, but i wouldn't be angry about it." todoroki responded.

"concerned about— hey! my taste is men is perfectly alright— okay maybe not. but i'm working on it."

"good luck with that." he chuckled. "are you coming to the party tonight? momo invited you, right?"

"about that, i wasn't sure i'd exactly fit in with all those rich people so i was considering maybe not going."

"that's too bad." he sighed. "i was looking forward to seeing you there."

"i haven't made up my mind yet, todoroki." you told him. "maybe i'll go after all."

"shoto."

"hm?"

"you can call me shoto." he offered.

"well in that case, you can call me y/n." you beamed.

~•~

THIS CHAPTER IS SO MESSY I HATE IT HERE

i swear i'm gonna edit most of this book when i get more time but rn i just wanna wr ite but my last braincell gave up on me and now i'm dumber than ever

anyways HOWDY