Indifference Towards Difference || Harry Potter

21 | Some Lost Things Are Found Again

You've got to listen to him.

I know you knew that girl that got sent to Anthony's ages ago. I don't know if you know about what happened where you are, so I nicked the newspaper off the kitchen table.

I'm sorry about a lot of stuff. Everything. After those... things came after us last summer, I did a lot of thinking.

Yeah, I learnt how to think. The months of the year as well. I think I've still got more to learn though.

Those things, they make you hear bad stuff, right? The worst sort. I felt like I'd never be happy again. But then everything that made me happy was always when you weren't. And the one time I wasn't, you got it worse.

I hope what I gave you helped. The new stuff's probably big, but you got all my old stuff. You've never really had anything new, have you? Always just my stuff. I hope the GameBoy makes up for it. I know it won't fully, but maybe just a bit?

Don't reply to this, in case Dad sees.

I'm sorry about everything, again. We could've been like brothers.

Maybe we could be like friends first?

-Big D

Harry felt as though he'd inhaled a bug. There was definitely something in his throat. He had wondered about Dudley's complete personality change, but now he truly understood the meaning of 'ignorance is bliss.'

This... this was too much. Something unwanted roared in his ears, demanding release. Emotion, Harry realised. All the emotions he'd kept nice and tightly packed up in his cupboard, pushing against the straints of his bolted door.

We could've been like brothers.

Harry let out a bitter laugh, swept away by the spinning in his head. How often had he questioned this, questioned why the Dursleys had never loved Harry liked they loved Dudley. They were more than capable of things beyond parental love; Harry had seen the small touches, secret whispers and coveted smiles between them. And those damn smiles they handed to Dudley like sweets... Harry remembered how he once would've done anything for just one. He still would, he realised, pathetic as it was.

Had the Dursleys loved him like they loved Dudley, had they both been treated and coddled and held the same, then yes, Harry and Dudley could've been like brothers.

Instead, they were starting off as barely friends 15 years later.

The roaring in his ears ceased as the oh-so-familiar numbness settled within him. There was nothing that could be done to change their past. But if there was the potential for a better future, shouldn't Harry try?

He exhaled quietly, holding his head in his hands, bony elbows resting on crossed legs. The idea of the dead not having to worry about such things had popped into his head again, and it was taking a little too much effort to force it back.

But force it back he did, and seeing that his day of bed-rest was turning to bed-stress, he may as well deal with the biggest stress of them all.

Slowly, Harry unrolled the Surrey Today newspaper. He felt his heart leap right out of his chest and run off at the sight of the front page headline.

ST ANTHONY'S BURNED TO THE GROUND!

Cold fingers held the paper. Green eyes blinked and read.

In the late hours of yesterday afternoon, St Anthony's Orphanage was burned to the ground, taking with it twenty-five lives of both the resident orphans and matrons alike. The cause of the fire remains unknown, and may do so for the forseeable future. Indeed, the destruction of such a building named after the gentlest and kindest of saints has caused natural outrage and upset amongst the community.