prayers for the lost.

Cold winter days

I feel breath fill my lungs

And leave me again when I exhale

In and out

It has been my life for many days now

Though no one would notice

Through my brave face

And happy attitude to laugh

No one can see past my mask

I have built it so well

It is my greatest accomplishment

But my the biggest contributor to my downfall

Can no one truly see the pain raging behind these steel blue eyes of mine

Can't they hear the plea of a lost child whose wailing goes through the millennia

Can't they feel the cloud of thousands of pounds of pressure crushing my lungs

My heart struggles to keep going

My brain cannot persuade the body to move

And the body isn’t strong enough to figure out how to fix the mess it has gotten itself into

I'm a doomed soul if my life line is cut

My string of sanity

My last line of defense from the raging roaring darkness that surrounds this being both day and night

Blotching out the sun

Casting shadows over the moon

Casting clouds about the world to smother the stars from shining through

Technology cannot find fault in my circuitry but the chemicals of nature

And natures God can feel this child; a whisper of the human it used to be

Slowly slip into insanity during this depressing time of year

When there is so much pure white all around

It reminds us that we are so far from perfect as we are stained red from tortured tears

When hope is dawning but hasn’t quite reached the horizon

We wait on baited breath to go back to when we can

Live without all of us dying on the insides

A time when you can comfortably say

What doesn’t kill me had better start running

But right now we quiver at the sight of our shadows growing long as the night could snuff out our meager existence before the next dawn if one is caught unprepared

 in the raging Blizzard of the cold unforgiving north

 where if the sun shines it is a weary light lacking all warmth and comfort that it has during the other three seasons.

May the dark stay at bay and the snow accumulate. And may the springtime song of a robin in the yard

Be not so far away as I seem to think it is.

In your name I pray amen.

A/N: Here I am going to apologize to _Shoes because I promised that this would have been uploaded last night however I never got around to doing such... So I am really sorry for that; please forgive me lol.... Okays that is all.