Book Reviews (CFCU - Sorry!!)

Finding You Review

Finding You by i-freaking-lo_ove-me

Overal review:
A teen fiction and possibly, possibly a mystery. When Daesyn makes a new best friend she can't get away/avoid her brother and the secrets he comes with, Not to mention that there is something about caelum that she Just can't seem to figure out. No, in fact something about thier whole family seems off.

Positives/ What I enjoyed:
- The paragraphs are of right length. It wasn't too long or too short, it was pleasing to the eyes.

- Punctuation/grammer is well done (from what I know about punctuation anyways.)
Makes it easy to read and gives off intended effect.

- I quite like coles character. I don't know if he is important to the plot (I presume he is as he had his whole own introduction bit ) but I don't know there something about him... Maybe it's the fact of him seeming like the typical bad/player type boy🤷🏻‍♀️🤔

- I feel from reading it that there is going to be some plot twists in the foresable future, this always makes good plot. (such as how you keep saying Emery is suspicious, kind of tells us she is suspicious/a bad nut/will do something shocking. However you want to hint this rather than tell it... See constructive criticism💕)

- You have really long chapters and I honestly don't know if this is a good or bad/ needs improvement type of thing because some people like long chapters but for me personally I like shorter chapters than the ones you gave... However this could be because I do my reading at night time, so am sort of dozing off anyway😴 but I don't know
... Maybe ask your followers what they think about your chapters length (if you have not already obviously 😅)

Constructive critism:
Ok, so before I start please don't be put off/ offended by how much writing is in this section as it really isn't that much (only like 3 points) it is just because I go into great detail so that you can improve your book better and know exactly what I'm talking about ☺️

- So, my first pointer would be to describe more! Whilst you do touch on description you don't detail it that much (This goes for places and people) but don't worry I'm here to help🙃.

Now the reason description is so important incase you didn't know is because the readers must be able to imagine a character or a place right down from their style of clothes to their features to the way they act and as for a place they must have a clear visualisation of that place because they need to be able to remember these characters/ places again in the future of the story. It's not enough to just state what the place or person is you must really make the reader feel these things.

Now you may be thinking "what if the character or place isn't important/mentioned again for the rest of the story?" well to this I say OK fair enough, you don't have to describe them as much as say a main character however you must, must still give us enough to be able to imagine a character. You could do this by only mentioning personalities in main characters but not in one thing characters for example of what I mean/ am trying to say:

So instead of saying 'a petite brunette' (the one next to Cole on the sofa) you could prehaps put,

'There next to Cole sat a petite, brunette, Hazel eyed girl, who wore a skimpy black dress(that just about covered the lady parts, that most wish to keep private.) Futher she wore a jack load of makeup that consists of a blossom red lipstick in which really stuck out compared to the rest of her. It is clear she is dressing to impress (prehaps that of Cole) however the only vibe that comes of is that of a tart, which is really quite upsetting as she seems like an innocent, quite girl.'

You see, I gave her the full appearance check.
Clothes ☑️
Makeup ☑️
Features (such as hair) ☑️

Now, as from what I could tell she was not a main character therfore she does not need a personality check or a further in depth description unlike that of example Emery.