Boris Johnson x Reader

a strangers home

I woke up, my head pounding and my body aching. I don't feel like I'm laying in the Tesco parking lot, but I can't open my eyes to check, my body is too sore. I hear talking coming from a distance, it sounds like two men. I need to get up and figure out my location, I sit up and try to open my eyes. When I finally open my eyes I look around, there I see what looks like Boris Johnson and Ronald McDonald talking in the distance. They look over at me and I pretend to be sleeping, but Boris sees me.

"Good Morning" he says, drinking a cup of tea. 

Ronald McDonald waves at me, then sprints away. He knocks his head on the door whilst trying to leave and collapses.

"Don't worry about him" Boris says, "He always injures himself."

Boris walks over to Ronald and looks at him, "Oh wait no he's just dead."

Boris claps his hands and two body guards fetch his body.

"Didn't like him anyway" Boris snaps.

Boris walks over to me and throws me his tea. It splashes over me, I start crying.

"Lol" he says. He's very nice to me.

Boris speaks again, "I am going to take you to get some food, follow me"

Boris grabs my legs and drags me out of the room, I hit my head on the way out. Ouch.