Perpetual Heart

Chapter Twenty Five

XiaoBai

Pain varies and it's severity is also different, you would think that when you have suffered through pain it won't catch you off guard or suprise you but pain is something you can never brace yourself for.

Father had gone to rest and I decided to go back to heaven, when I arrive Prince Yuka was waiting for me at heaven's gate. "Come with me." He said as he took my hand and we disappeared and appeared at the Purple Sea. "What's going on why are we here?" I asked and Yuka sighed. "Dong Hua asked me to bring you here." He looked at me. "How lucky you are..... Fengjiu I don't know how to tell you this." His eyes were red from the tears he was holding. "What's wrong with Dijiun?" I asked softly. "Dijiun is gone." He whispered softly but I couldn't understand what he was saying. "After hearing that Wang Shu was working with Kai in trying to hurt you or separating you Dong Hua went to the demon lands, in anger he purified the whole of the demon lands even the forbidden realm then he took away Wang Shu's and Kai's powers, essence and cultivation and sealed it in the ward he created along with his spirit to keep demons away and because of this his spirit tore and his body has...." I don't know what happened but I saw Yuka looking at me horrified and everything went dark.

I opened my eyes and I was inside the palace, Yuka was sitting next to me and watching me. "What happened?" He sighed. "You fainted." Then I remembered the conversation we were having. "H-oow... H-ee left me." I said sadly and Yuka shook his head but suddenly I felt so angry and I screamed. "After everything we have been through!!! Fate still gets in the way! Haven't we lost enough already!? Haven't we suffered in enough, I have given my whole life into loving him; I worked so hard to get him to notice me and all the twist and turns I lose my life just like that!!!" I started sobbing. "Fengjiu you need to calm down." Yuka said softly. " How can I calm down when the love of my life is gone? There's nothing I have ever feared losing him to death, you don't know the pain that is inside of me or what I'm feeling right now. You don't know the aching inside of me or the bleeding of my heart, Dijiun keeps hurting me only this time he has scarred me forever." The pain was starting to spread everywhere not just in my heart anymore, I was sure that this what I was going to die from the pain. "He gave up on me, doesn't he think I'm worthy of him? Why is it so easy for him to leave me all the time? I can't find with death and I can't scream at it, but why did it have to take away the one precious person I loved." I caressed my ring. "Fengjiu why do you think like that? Dong Hua loves you the most, he..." I shook my head at him. "If he loved me the most he wouldn't have left me, he would have taken me with him, I can take the physical pain but I cannot take the pain in my soul. My soul is dying each second, if the world came to know that he's gone they would be saddened not because they care but because someone will have to take responsibility for the world." I couldn't feel the tears anymore only the sound of my sobbing voice filled the palace. "They don't know Dong Hua at all, they don't know that he pretends to be stoic cold and tough but he really just is a loving mischievous child, they don't know that he loves putting his hands inside my sleeping robe when we sleep, saying that he is making sure I don't sneak away. They don't know he hates it when I drink cold water at night because I end getting sick, they don't know that the Dijiun masks he wears with everyone never exists when he is with me, tell me what is the purpose of living in the world where Dong Hua is not in." I got up from the bed and I went outside. "This is our home but it's not warm without him." I drew my sword out ready to stab myself but Yuka grabbed it away. "Why did you stop me!!" He looked at me horrified. "Fengjiu have you lost your mind!!?" He yelled and I laughed. "Why are you behaving like it's the end of the world!! Or life? You're still young you can always marry someone else." The knife in my heart twisted going in deeper and intensifying the pain. "My world has ended, Yuka I didn't work so hard and made all the efforts I had just so I can marry someone else, he is the only thing that I want but nobody will give him to me now. So I'd rather go looking for him, what's the use of heaven when heaven itself is no longer exists, finding him is better than feeling the pain I'm feeling. Even if I don't meet him in the after life, I could always find a way because I would find Dong Hua Dijiun anywhere." I took small steps and then I fell down. "Leave me alone please." I pleaded with Yuka and he disappeared.

Pain can knock you out of breath and it can also make you feel empty, the emptiness makes you wonder whether you're still alive or you are just existing.
Bai Fengjiu lover of Dong Hua Dijiun look at how broken you are, if I had known that going back to heaven would have ended his life I wouldn't have allowed him to go back. We haven't had enough time, I just got you and you have left me just like that, I want to see you so bad and just hold you in my arms, I want you to come back and tease me and tell me how stupid I am for falling for your tricks, my love it's only been two hours but it feels like it's been a thousand years, how will I live forever like this? How will I survive to the next hour? Dijiun you abandoned me I thought you loved me, I am not going to be able to survive this you can't expect me to survive this because I want to be with you.

I coughed up blood but instead of being alarmed I laughed, loosing you has made me sick, I want to feel your loving arms around me and I want you to kiss me and I want to hear you call me XiaoBai. How can your jealousy allow you to leave me? The majestic Dong Hua gets jealous when other people try get close to me, I've never wanted you to protect me because I always wanted to protect you but Dong Hua I need your protection right now, I need you to shield me from this pain and make the ache go away.

Yuka

I watched her as she sat on the ground looking lifeless, I could have told her that he would come back but I think hearing his name is killing her all the more, what an impressive love these two share if she carried on like this she will die from the depression. She laid back on the ground and she just stared at the sky, I didn't know what to do so I went to Qingqiu to get her father. When I arrived she was still laying down and staring at the sky. "Xioajiu." Bai Yi called her softly but she didn't even move, Bai Yi went close to her and picked her up. "XiaoJiu why are you laying on the ground? You will get sick." She didn't say anything and he looked at me. "Father." She whispered and the valley of tears flooded out, Bai Yi held her close to him like he was trying to shield her away from the pain. "I'm here, I'm with you." He comforted her. "Father, he doesn't love me very much." She whispered through her tears. "XiaoJiu don't you know that Dong Hua loves you more than anything?" He asked but she didn't say anything. "I want to die together with him." Bai Yi held his breath. "If you die, who will you leave me with?" He asked gently and she put her hands on his face. "You have mother, you could always make another child." Bai Yi shook his head. "You're my precious baby, I don't want another child but you. Will you be that cruel and leave your father without a daughter?" He asked softly and she shook her head. "I won't leave father." He nodded then he knocked her out. "She needs to sleep her pain is suffocating, I can feel it as I'm holding her." He said as he got inside the palace and laid her down. "Please keep an eye on her, I don't trust her at the moment she might do something to cause harm to herself." I nodded my head. "No need to worry I will watch her." I promised as we watched over the sleeping child.